I think I hate where I work
I do not hate what I do, but I hate all the crap at work. Everyone has different expectations, I am expected to be a leader but have no power. I am expected to do client development, but am given no real support. I get condescending emails all the time from the one older lawyer that is actually working me into her clients, so I feel like I have to put up with it or risk losing my future. She is retiring in two years, so there is a light at the end of the tunnel, but two years is a long time. The atmosphere is still way better than my last job, but I have never wanted more to be independently wealthy than I do right at this moment. It does not help that my joy outlets have been less joyful for the last several months as well, and I am not sure how to fix that. I have taken big steps back in terms of responsibility in the sca so I could just focus on the fun, but that has not translated yet into the joy that has slipped away. I also need to figure out what I can do for alone time each day that will self soothe that does not involve eating as that crutch is sabotaging my weight loss efforts. Anyway, dentist is back, so I need to go. More thought later.
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