In which I write 1280 words of writerly meta when I could have just written porn

[ras_elased]

So, I was going to post this earlier tonight, but then BRADLEY AND COLIN'S EPIC DATE NIGHT happened, and somehow I didn't get around to it. SHOCKING, I KNOW.

Anyway,

Comments

[ras_elased]

From one high maintenance writer to another: I TOTALLY FEEL YOU. I don't know what I'd do without cheerleaders. The best fic I've written since Two Weeks Notice (NOT THAT THERE'S A LOT TO CHOOSE FROM, BUT WHATEVER) was Something Fragile, and that fic would absolutely not have even existed without puckling's saint-like patience while I bitched and moaned at her constantly and she kept propping me back up whenever I would have preferred to just curl up in a fetal position and give it up altogether.

But other than that I haven't really had any cheerleaders recently, because these WIPs that I'm writing are SO HUGE that I would feel guilty inflicting them innocent bystanders. BUT NOW YOU'VE OFFERED, SO I WILL PROBABLY TAKE YOU UP ON THAT. I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'VE GOTTEN YOURSELF INTO. MWAHAHAHAHA. (In all seriousness, though, it means so much to me that you would even offer hand-holding services, and I wish you could have seen my face when I read those words, because it made my heart go all wibbly.)

And I think you've hit the nail on the head about writing smaller fics, drabbles and such. Because I used to write mostly shorter fics, with the occasional multi-chapter fic thrown in for good measure. But now, with only working on these two huge fics, it's like I've got all my hopes and dreams pinned on these two fics, and if I can spread that out a bit I think it will take a lot of the pressure off. In hindsight, I think one of the reasons I even started working on these mammoth things instead of my usual smaller fics is out of fear, because I think I was subconsciously afraid to actually finish anything. But I think the best way to get over that is to just face it, to just put stuff out there, like you said, and I think it might help dissipate the anxiety I'm feeling for my epics.

And finally, as for coming to terms with your writing ability, I'm not even sure what to say about that because girl. Yeah. I feel you so hard on that. I think I feel the same way that you do, that I'm an okay writer. I'm not horrible (I hope!), and I'm not outstanding. It isn't an exactly an easy thing to come to grips with, because I want so badly to be brilliant.

So, I know I totally shouldn't be amused by this, but considering you are one of the people I was thinking about when I mentioned authors on a whole other level, I cannot help but find this a bit hilariously ironic. ♥

And I love what you have to say about playing to your strengths, and I actually mentioned that to magog_83 above. And honestly, I would really like to hear what you think my strengths are, because I feel like I have no idea. I know I'm good at romcom-y type situations, and I like to take canon and turn it on its head and see what I can do with it, but other than that, I'm pretty much at a loss. It's hard to play to your strengths when you don't really know what they are! :(

And thank you so much for everything you've said, it's really opened my eyes up to a lot of stuff and given me plenty to think about! ♥♥♥

[ras_elased]

I think you've been too much inside your own head, babe. Time to come back out and play.

OMG, YES, THAT IS EXACTLY IT. ♥

I guess I am afraid of being one of those needy writers who keeps imposing on people all the time, so it makes me afraid to step outside myself and ask for help. BUT I VERY MUCH NEED IT, and so I might as well accept that part of myself. ;)

AND I WILL TOTALLY SEND STUFF TO YOU. Don't worry, I can wait a week or two for your life to get less crazy. ♥♥♥x10000000!!!