It's A Small World After All - Part Ten
Hey there, everyone! It's time for Part Ten of It's A Small World, a 'you suck at parenting' challenge. In the last update, France took everyone on a lovely holiday to Takemizu Village, learned to teleport and got fit. There was tea, fights and mistaken identity, then once home, France went on a dream date with NyoBelgium and screwed him in the sauna. Twice.
Also bees.
I should also mention that this update contains much nudity. Hooray! Quick, get in there before Photobucket nukes it all!
So after their date, Belgium comes by with flowers. Which are nice, but now I want all the expensive, shiny gifts. I shall have to send France on some more dates.
France: Fine with me!
Oh, and I brought an espresso machine. The teens are thrilled by this, as it means they never have to sleep again, ever.
The mini-golf lessons relentlessly continue.
As do the ventrillofarts. I hope no-one ever lights a match in the house.
And while America and Switzerland are bonding over fart jokes, Seychelles randomly finds a necklace on the beach.
Switzerland: What the hell are you doing?
England: Can you pass me a pillow from over there?
Switzerland: Wha-NO, I'm neutral! And I'd just end up smothering you by 'accident' when I handed it over...
Spaghetti for breakfast? People are gonna stop mistaking you for America and start mistaking you for Italy.
Canada: Eh, that would be an improvement.
The next day, these two twerps reached new heights of bloody annoying by deciding to argue just as the school bus arrived.
Switzerland: Jeez, would you get out of my personal space?
England: What's the problem? I'm not touching you.
England: NOW I'm touching you! With my fists!
Switzerland: Speaking of fists, eat mine!
Belgium: Um, guys? Can I get past? Guys? GUYS?!
Switzerland: Hah! Take that, jerk.
England: Grr... I'll get you!
Don't worry, no rush, you've got all day... seeing as you missed the school bus.
France managed to haul England to class, but Belgium and Switzerland just stood there on the pavement, gossiping, and wouldn't get in the car.
England: I don't need any help, my baking is fantastic!
France: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA*cough*wheeze*hack*
England: Hope you choke, smegger.
Enjoy the card, you'll never get to use it.
Hah, easy choice. Like America's going to waste his time with someone else's old, crappy mascot.
Well drat.
America: They didn't even let me keep the suit. :(
Niiiiice.
Booooo.
And then I had an IDEA. When you have a sim using a Bubble Blower, you can click on other sims and ask them to join you. Sims use that thing FOREVER. I have a mod that improves social when sims use it.
Maybe if I can get these two dickheads high for long enough, they'll stop trying to kill each other all the damn time and actually go to school!
OH MY GOD A POSITIVE RELATIONSHIP! IS THIS THE REAL LIFE, IS IT JUST FANTASY!
So once France gets Switzerland and England settled, he heads indoors to help teach Canada... I forget what, logic maybe? Whatever it is the fingerprint scanner teaches you, anyway.
France: Scan the mouse.
Canada: ...The mouse?
France: Scan it.
Canada: But um, the cats are the only ones to touch it.
France: So?
Canada: Cats... don't have fingerprints.
France: Excellent deduction! And that's how you learn logic!
After that, I went and built a community lot for France so I'd know just how much more he had to save. It's amazing. Somewhere in the region of $60,000, which he's pretty close to. But then disaster struck - the home lot corrupted! I couldn't get onto it at all. Happily I had the old original one in my lots bin. But because there was a stay-things shrub on the lot, none of the things got sold when I moved them out.
So, um, this happened.
I had to go back into the lot in build mode and get rid of the cribs and the car, which finally pushed the price down low enough to buy it. Unfortunately, it left France with around 10p.
Switzerland: At least we still have each other, isn't that right, Lily?
Switzerland: Shame we've still got you.
So much for being bubble buds. Sigh.
France: I've had enough! Just talk to each other, dammit!
England: But I don't wanna. :(
France: OK, I was totally saving you in case anyone else died, but I kind of need money now.
Switzerland: I'LL SCRATCH YOUR EYES OUT!
Genie: Oh my gosh, those two boys are fighting!
France: Yeah, they do that. So, cash?
Seychelles: WOO GO ENGLAND KICK HIS ARSE!
Genie: I can't watch!
France: Look, I'm kind of skint right now, can I have some money or not?
England: I'LL RIP YOUR KNOB OFF!
Genie: Eeek, they're going to get hurt!
France: I'll come back later, shall I?
Seychelles: ENGLAND! ENGLAND! ENG-oh.
France finally gets his wish and the genies drops a cool 10 grand down the toilet, but that's not going to be enough for the community lot.
Time Lily and Iris started earning some more cash. I tried hiring an obedience trainer, but she was fucking useless and immediately skived off to go watch TV, so France taught them some skills so they could be promoted.
Sure would be nice if Seychelles could get a promotion too, that'd be a real help. Let's try the oranges!
Aw nutsucks.
Seychelles: AGAIN?!
She really was fired this time too. :(
And just to round up the afternoon of fail, Canada gets demoted.
Belgium's sunburn faded a while ago, so she's trying to tan again.
And this time she manages it!
Belgium: Aww yeah, check me out!
Dating tends to bring some pretty neat cash rewards, so I send France out to the pub to woo NyoChina.
Hahaha! Haha!
Sweden: *glare*
OK, OK, I'll really start fixing this, I promise.
The pub is cute, but France and China both rolled wants to go out to dinner, so I sent them to my adorable l'il pink restaurant.
France: Sooo... having fun?
China: Not so bad.
France: Excellent. Have I mentioned that I could really use a flat screen TV or two around the house?
A dream date! Maybe you'll get that TV after all! But there's plenty of time left on this date, let's see if we can't fulfil one or two of China's wants there. ^^
And just for a change, I made France use his bed for sex too.
My bubble bong brings all the kids to the yard.
While rummaging through the teens inventories to see if they had anything I could sell, I found this little beauty in America's pockets. Nice! I'd never seen a sim catch one of these before!
Liechtenstein: Whose a cute kitty cat? Ess oo are!
Lily: baby talk me some more and I'll smack your mouth off.
Despite the inventory plunder, there's still not enough cash. It's too late to call anyone else for a date, so I make France go digging in his birthday suit while we all wait for China to drop off a gift.
England: Put it there, pal.
Canada: Aww, all riaaaaaaaagh!
England: Teehee!
Canada: Why you little-!
Liechtenstein: Aww, don't be mad at him, it was kind of funny.
England: Thanks for sticking up for me. Shake?
Liechtenstein: Arrrrgh!
I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU FELL FOR THAT YOU WERE STANDING -RIGHT THERE- WHEN HE DID IT TO CANADA!
Next morning, France is still digging.
France: Can't I stop and shower?
What for? The water pipe you just burst will wash the stench away in no time.
AMAZING! ASTOUNDING! WHAT RICHES WILL YOU FIND NEXT?!
BE STILL MY BEATING HEART! That community lot is a good as yours!
England: Ugh, is he stalking me again?
Liechtenstein: Don't worry, I'll stand here and prevent him from getting any closer. ♥
England: ...I'm still gay.
Well that's a no-brainer. Punk-ass England ain't toning it down for anyone.
Yessss, give me the money.
I wanted to see how many fights England and Switzerland had each won. I can't remember exact numbers, but Switzerland has pretty much pummelled England to a pulp. It's a good thing this game doesn't come with fight injuries and hospital bills! Anyway, I also found out that several kids had become overachievers when I wasn't looking.
Also England got pick-pocketed. Sucks to be you, I guess.
Must fix nations.
And just to annoy me some more, Seychelles switches into some stupid basegame hair for her new job. I can't be too mad though, cos she entertains me all the time by sliding down the banister.
France's digging sucks almost as much as his fishing, so I give in and blow his third wish on more money.
...What?
Genie: Hey, if it bothers you, you could just sell the lamp.
No, no, no bother, Ill happily take three more wishes. (I just hope this isn't an impending sign of hood implosion).
Have a shot of America sunbathing. Just because.
France: Why am I still doing this when there's a bag of cash behind me?
Because you've still got 20 grand to grub up. Get digging.
This pop up appears to remind me that the teens are getting older. I've decided I'm going to send them to college on their last day, but I'm not sure how I'll play. I'll ask you lot nearer the time. ^^
Finally, the minigolf and fingerprinting pays off and Canada gets a promotion.
France takes a moment to get Switzerland and England settled around the bong...
And then he buys The Club!
So, welcome to The Club. France is gonna love this place.
Because it's a strip bar.
It even has a little employee break room! Isn't it adorable?!
I took some of the teens along, thinking I could get them to work behind the bar, but I couldn't do it. Maybe teens can't be employed by owned businesses, or maybe it's because they're in the same household and so I would have to control them to work, but as I couldn't make them work, I wound up leaving them to their own devices.
SO OF COURSE, THEY DID THIS!
I don't think Switzerland's quite got the hang of stripping yet...
Unlike Seychelles.
At least England's behaving himself, hanging out in the breakroom and eating crisps.
What have I done?!?
Seychelles: *boogie boogie*
England: EEEK A NAKED GIRL!
I don't think I've ever mentioned it before, but Seychelles and England are like totally platonic super best friends forever. So seeing her shaking her naked ladygarden at him must be all kinds of horrifying.
England: Actually, this looks kind of fun.
NOOO, NOT YOU TOO!
Awwwwwkward.
Not sure if even more awkward.
And where's France while all his under-age charges are getting naked for cash? Huffing on the bong with Pimp Madame Venus.
France: Yeah, this is great! Shake it, shake it- hey, where's all my admirers?
Oh you're boring, everyone's seen your arse a million times now.
Anyway, I sent them all home after a while, only for Switzerland to wet himself because he'd been so busy dancing, he'd forgot to use the toilet.
And finally, better late than never, China arrives with a date gift.
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