need some humor
This article appeared in my local newspaper. It's pretty funny. I put it under a cut because it's kinda long.....
by Del Stone Jr.
The possibility exists the National Hurricane Center will run out of names before this awful season has ended. If so, their plan is to borrow letters from the Greek alphabet--Alpha, Gamma, Omega, and so on.
I guess they can do that, but for what MY opinion is worth, a better idea is to let US come up with a new list of names. In fact, I've already compiled several suggestions:
A: Hurricane Armageddon. In this day of meaner, rougher hurricanes, the name seems apropos.
B: Hurricane Bush. Dubya and Jeb can duke it out over whom this storm is name.
C: Hurricane Cantore. Let's see Jim cover himself. "Cantore is an extremely dangerous menace," Jim shrieks into the wind. " You must flee Cantore if you value your life." We're already running, Jim.
D: Hurricane Del. Yes, after years of obsessing, I deserve a hurricane of my very own.
E: Hurricane Enough, as in "Enough of those damn hurricanes!"
F: Hurricane FEMA. Maybe THAT will get their attention.
G: Hurricane Godzilla. I stole that from the guys at 99Rock. In lieu of Godzilla, Hurricane Generator.
H: Hurricane Hell. Unfortunately, people might look at this as a reference to a place (here), not a storm.
I: Hurricane I'm Outta Here. Enough said?
J: Hurricane Jittery.
K: Hurricane King Kong. Gotta have this one if we're gonna have Godzilla.
L: Hurricane Liquor. I'll drink to that one!
M: Hurricane Martha, as in Stewart.
N: Hurricane Nightstalker. OK, so nobody has given their baby this name. Maybe I can strong-arm the Hurricane Center into stepping outside the name box.
O: Hurricane Oh My God, as in, "Another One!?"
P: Huricane Plywood.
R: Hurricane Roofer.
S: Hurricane Shingles.
T: Hurricane Tarp. I sense a theme.
U: Hurricane Uh Oh. This name works for most any hurricane utterance.
V: Hurricane Valium. I'll need several to make it through the next storm.
W: Hurricane Weather Channel. Run, Weather Channel TV personalities, run! We have seen the enemy, and it is YOU!
X: Hurricane Expletive
Y: Hurricane Yonder, as in "Look yonder, Clem! That thar's 'nother hurricane a comin'."
Z: Hurricane Zoloft. I'm starting to feel better already.
by Del Stone Jr.
The possibility exists the National Hurricane Center will run out of names before this awful season has ended. If so, their plan is to borrow letters from the Greek alphabet--Alpha, Gamma, Omega, and so on.
I guess they can do that, but for what MY opinion is worth, a better idea is to let US come up with a new list of names. In fact, I've already compiled several suggestions:
A: Hurricane Armageddon. In this day of meaner, rougher hurricanes, the name seems apropos.
B: Hurricane Bush. Dubya and Jeb can duke it out over whom this storm is name.
C: Hurricane Cantore. Let's see Jim cover himself. "Cantore is an extremely dangerous menace," Jim shrieks into the wind. " You must flee Cantore if you value your life." We're already running, Jim.
D: Hurricane Del. Yes, after years of obsessing, I deserve a hurricane of my very own.
E: Hurricane Enough, as in "Enough of those damn hurricanes!"
F: Hurricane FEMA. Maybe THAT will get their attention.
G: Hurricane Godzilla. I stole that from the guys at 99Rock. In lieu of Godzilla, Hurricane Generator.
H: Hurricane Hell. Unfortunately, people might look at this as a reference to a place (here), not a storm.
I: Hurricane I'm Outta Here. Enough said?
J: Hurricane Jittery.
K: Hurricane King Kong. Gotta have this one if we're gonna have Godzilla.
L: Hurricane Liquor. I'll drink to that one!
M: Hurricane Martha, as in Stewart.
N: Hurricane Nightstalker. OK, so nobody has given their baby this name. Maybe I can strong-arm the Hurricane Center into stepping outside the name box.
O: Hurricane Oh My God, as in, "Another One!?"
P: Huricane Plywood.
R: Hurricane Roofer.
S: Hurricane Shingles.
T: Hurricane Tarp. I sense a theme.
U: Hurricane Uh Oh. This name works for most any hurricane utterance.
V: Hurricane Valium. I'll need several to make it through the next storm.
W: Hurricane Weather Channel. Run, Weather Channel TV personalities, run! We have seen the enemy, and it is YOU!
X: Hurricane Expletive
Y: Hurricane Yonder, as in "Look yonder, Clem! That thar's 'nother hurricane a comin'."
Z: Hurricane Zoloft. I'm starting to feel better already.