All We Know (Jalex) Chapter Nine
Title: All We Know
Pairing: Jalex (Jack Barakat/Alex Gaskarth)
Rating: PG-13
Warning: Swearing, some smut, mpreg
Summary: Alex is your normal popular high school party boy. Great life, fun times and anything he wanted. Jack isn’t so lucky. He has an okay life, but has always been under strict rule, so when these two cross paths at a high school party, both of their life’s take an unexpected turn.
Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own Jack or Alex. Story line is mine though. Title cred to Paramore.
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-22 Weeks-
I actually haven't seen Alex all week. It was a little different from the past few when he would come over or I would go over. My mom thought that I was spending too much time with him. I wish the caring supportive mom that I had would come back. I was upstairs In my room just watching TV, but I felt really alone. I went downstairs, with a little trouble, and walked to my moms room. I knocked on the wood frame and she looked up at me from her bed. She smiled and patted the bed next to her. I went over and sat down. “Hey mom.”
“Hey, baby,” she said, and sat down the clothes that she was folding. “Everything okay?” she asked and looked at me. I just shrugged.
“I just kind of wanna talk to you. It’s been a while.” She gave me a sympathetic look and nodded.
“What did you want to talk about?” I shrugged again.
“Nothing in particular. Just… This whole pregnancy thing, I feel like I lost your trust and… I hate that I feel like that.” I tried my best not to look at her, she always had this look of disappointment towards me. “I hope that you don't hate me too much…”
“Baby,” she said, hugging me. “I can’t hate you. Yeah, you made a really stupid choice and broke a lot of my trust… But you’re still my son. I can’t stay mad at you forever,” She paused for a second. “But once the baby is born we can find it a nice healthy home-”
“No!” I shouted at her. “We already talked about this. Alex and I wanna keep the baby.” I was getting angry again. I hated these mood changes.
“Jack, you know that two men are not healthy for a babies life. Two men are not supposed to be together. I don't want to hear this, Jack.” Why does she insist on doing this? All this is doing in making me pissed of at her.
“Can you just stop!” I screamed. “This isn’t about you or what you want. This is about me, Alex, our fucking baby. This has nothing to do with you.” I was fuming at this point. I got up and walked to the door.
“Jack-” she tried talking, but I cut her off once again.
“No.” I turned back to her. “I just wanted to talk to you and I wanted you to support me, and as always, you made it about you. Well guess what? It’s. Not. About. You.” My breathing was heavy. It really did hurt me to talk to my mom that way, but no matter what I said to her, she wouldn't listen. “I made a mistake, and I know. I’m sorry, but I can't do anything about it now.” I just walked out of the room after that. I walked past the living room where my dad was and stopped for a second, then started to walked again until I heard my name.
“Jack!” my dad called me. Taking a deep breath, I turned and walked over to his place on the couch. “Hey, take a seat.” I sat next to feeling awkward. We’ve haven't really talked since they found out about me being pregnant. He glanced at my stomach and back at my face quickly. “Is everything okay? You and your mom sounded pretty, rough.”
“I don't know.” I said honestly. “It’s like she doesn't want to help me at all.” I had one hand on the top of my belly and one on the bottom rubbing it a little. “I just wanted to talk and she just… I hate it.”
“Well it’s a lot to take in. Your mom and I both grew up where, men didn’t have romantic relationships with other men, let alone get pregnant.” I nodded. It was understandable, but it still sucked because the way she treats me.
“I know,” I told him, and looked at him. “But I just want her to accept this. I can't just go back and change it now. It’s too late for that. She’s the grandma of this baby and I want her to be in it’s life. I want you to be in it too, if you don't hate me too, that is.” My dads eyes when sympathetic to me and grabbed my right hand holding it.
“Jack, I'm your father. I know that you mom is taking a while, but you are still my son and I'm going to support that. I'm not happy about this, but it’s happening anyway.” I bit my lip really wanting to cry. It might have been from my father telling me he supported me, or it could be these hormones. “Give your mom time. She’ll come around. I still need time to process this, but putting words in your mouth and forcing our opinions on you won't help this.” he paused for a second, it looked like he was thinking about something.
“Do you really like other boys?” I sighed and nodded. He nodded too. He didn't say anything after that. I got up and adjusted my shirt. “Can I feel it?” I was a little shocked at the question, but really happy too. My dad was accepting this. I shrugged my shoulder and stepped closer him. My dad was hesitant at first, but put both hands on my stomach. There was no movement at first, but then there was a tiny little kick on the side. My dad and I both smiled and chuckled a little.
He took his hands off of me, still smiling. My phone rang and I took it out of my pocket. “Hello?” I asked taking the call.
“Umm... Hey, Jay.” I really liked the nervous Alex, he made me laugh. The nickname was new, but I actually really liked it. “Do you wanna come to dinner with my grandma and me?”
“Why do you want me to come?” I asked, I was kind of surprised.
“I think my grandma should met you. She kind of wants to, too.” That was shocking. I thought that he didn't want me around his grandma too much. But then again, he did say he still wanted me over since he knew about how my mom wasn't exactly supportive.
“Sure.” I said back to him.
“Great. I’ll pick you in five minutes.” He said, and the line went dead.
“Was that Alex?” My dad asked and I nodded in reply, and I put my phone back in my pocket. “He’s the dad right?” I nodded again. “Make sure he doesn't fuck up. I might not be happy about this, but that is still my grandchild in there.” I smiled and chuckled at him.
“I’ll make sure of it.” I told him, and went over to the door sliding my shoes on and putting on my jacket. I wish it was summer. “Alex is picking me up to have dinner with his grandma. I’ll be home later.” My dad looked really hesitant, but let me go. What was so bad that could happen with his grandma around? Probably nothing.
A few minutes later, Alex showed up and I got in the car. I saw his grandma from the passenger seat eyeing my belly. I felt really self-conscious about it. I sat and pulled my jacket over my belly as far as it would go. She seemed like a nice person, but I'm guessing she hates the idea of a male being pregnant. What's going to happen when Alex tells her? If he ever tells here.
We drove for a few minutes until we reached a small family restaurant. I’ve actually never been here. It was kind of hidden away from everyone else, I liked it. Alex came around to the other side of the car and help his grandmother out. She wasn't really old, sixties maybe, but Alex was a gentleman to her. Just before I was about to open my door, he scooted over and opened it up for me. Getting out, his grandmother looked at my stomach again. I blushed feeling like coming was maybe a bad idea after all. Alex opened the restaurant door for both of us and we took our seats near the back of the place in a booth. It wasn't a super fancy place, but it was nice and quiet with a few other people scattered around the area. Our waitress came over with our menus and we ordered our drinks.
“May I ask you something son?” Alex’s grandmother asked me, and sat down her drink. I nodded and sat down my drink too. “Are you one of those homosexuals?” I froze a little. I looked at Alex for any kind of ‘okay’ about what I can tell her. Alex just shrugged.
“Umm… Yeah.” I said, nodding my head. She gave me a weird look and took a drink of her tea.
“I don’t really approve of this kind of thing. It’s wrong and against the bible.” I know that she was raise this way, but it still really hurt for her to say that. I was never a bad person. Yeah, I was attracted to males, her grandson being one of them, but I was always a good person and never got into trouble, well, until lately. “This pregnancy too. It’s wrong. Basically giving birth to the devil.”
“Grandma,” Alex chimed in and gave her a look.
“Oh shush, Alexander. You can possibly support this. I don't really like you hanging out with those gays. Imagine what they could do to you. AIDS, STD’s, now pregnancies.” She was really hurting me right now.
“Grandma stop. Straight people get that too. I’m not gay, don't worry, But Jack is a friend and I'm not going to let you talk to him like that, not everything in the bible is true,” This side of Alex always surprised me, but I liked it. For a few minutes, Alex and his grandmother went on talking and arguing back and forth about being gay and all the annoying shit. The waitress brought out our food and I tried eating, but all this arguing was getting to me. It was starting to get overwhelming. My breathing got a little heavy.
“I need some air.” I said and got up quickly leaving the restaurant. I stood outside trying to catch my breath and holding my stomach. I felt a hand on my shoulder and I jumped a little. I turned seeing a concerned Alex looking back at me.
“Are you okay?” he questioned and I nodded. “Do you wanna leave? I'm okay if you want too. I can drive you back home.”
“I'm fine. Really.” he gave me a disbelieving look. “I just hate that your grandma doesn't like me. I'm carrying you baby, dammit. It’s really hurt to be talked about like I'm not even here.” Alex got a sad, sorry look on his face then wrapped his arms around my shoulders.
“I'm sorry, Jack. I just wanted you to meet her. I know she hated this stuff but I didn't think she would be mean about it.” I hugged him back telling him that it wasn't his fault. “I wanna tell her.” I widened my eyes at him. We had a silent conversation before going back into his grandmother paying for the lunch. “Gran. I need to tell you something.” He was holding my hand tight. I could feel him shaking, I squeezed my hand back reassuring him he’ll be okay.
“What is it dear?” She asked standing up. Alex took a deep breath and started to talk.
“Um... The baby um… Jack is pregnant with… My baby.” Alex mumbled the last part. If I wasn't standing right next to him, I would have never hear him.
“I can't hear you hun, you need to speak up.” his grandmother said.
“Jack is pregnant with my baby.” he final spat out. He gulped and looked back at the older lady. She had a shocked look on her face, but that quickly changed into… well I’m not really sure what she was feeling or thinking. She looked at me with a mean stare.
“I’ll be in the car.” she mumbled and pushed past Alex, making sure that she didn't come anywhere near me. Alex and I looked at each other. He looked like he was going to break in tear any minute. He mumbled to me, and we walked out to the car. I sat in the back again and his grandma was sitting in the front.
The car ride back was a defining silence. Alex went to apologize a couple times, but his grandma never said anything back. We got back to the house and she couldn't get back in the house quick enough. Alex drove me back to my house and helped me out of the car. I could tell in his eyes that the rejection for his grandmother hurt him, a lot. I never actually knew mine, but I could only imagine how he felt. I lent forward and hugged him trying to make some kind of comfort. After a couple seconds, he hugged me back.
“I'm sorry about her. She’s just… Not used to this kind of thing.” I nodded.
“It’s okay. I get it. My mom has been the same way. Surprisingly, it’s been my dad who has been the most comforting lately.” He smiled at me and hugged me again.
“I see you tomorrow, okay? I promise I'm not gonna be a dick anymore in school. I already made that promise, but I'm serious this time. After what my grandma said to me, I can't imagine how you feel with a bunch of people telling you at school.” it was almost like her read my mind. I nodded once again and said my goodbye. I walked in to my mom and dad on the couch watching more TV. I smiled to them and went upstairs.
I was really falling for Alex. Every time he showed his caring side, every time he defended me, hugged me, I was falling more and more. I laid on the bed lifting up my shirt. I ran my hands along the smooth belly feeling little kicks every once in a while. How was I supposed to raise a baby with someone who straight? So far at least. I kept my arms on the belly, like I had to keep it warm in the freezing air of my room.
I took a small nap. but woke up to fingers being ran through my hair. It startled me at first but when I realized it was Alex, I relaxed again. “Hey,” he said, smiling. I mumbled a hey back. he sat next me me on the bed and helped me sit up. I got a better look at him, he was a mess. His hair was poking out in all different directions, his eyes were red and puffy, his cheeks were flustered and his breathing was kind of hard. it looked like he had some kind of break down, his body was shaking a little.
“Are you okay? What happened?” I asked, grabbing his hand and running my thumb along the back. He let out a shaky breath and shook his head.
“My grandma and I got in a really big fight. My mom joined in trying to help be.” He was starting to cry again. “My grandma left… She wants nothing to do with use anymore.” He cried, clasping his hand over his mouth. I pulled him to me as close as I could without hurting my belly. “Everyone fucking leaves and I hate it. All because I like you and that baby is mine.” I was shocked at what he said. He likes me?
I pushed the thought to the back of my head and just held him. I knew his dad left when he was little, but now his grandmother was gone too. I rubbed his back until he calmed a little. “it’s going to be okay.” I mumbled in his ear and kissed his head. I've never seen him this broken. “I'm not gonna leave you.” I said to him and just kept him close.
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This chapter is longer than the rest. A good thing I guess. Since this story is a little upside down, I made the dad more accepting and Alex has a really close relationship with his grandma. I know a lot of families are like that, but not most fanfics I've read so, yeah. I hope you liked it. Please let me know! More regular updates soon, I'm finally back from my trip to the American Beauty Show in Chicago.