You know I feel ya. That's how I feel in particular about the Hillsdale crowd. I was a part of the new friendships in that small Freshman class, but I left the school for Purdue... and watched the friendships go on without me - and I think what I could have been a part of.
I always am the one who shows up, tries to fit in, then fades out
Yeah. I don't like this feeling. Even in a sociology class, I feel it. In lab, everyone is all chatty and has found 'friends' and even when we are to find a group, I don't find one. It's just me.
My sister has all kinds of different groups with friends. And they are all very interesting women! It makes me feel like I'm lacking so much! She puts a lot of work into sustaining the groups: high school friends, college, each group meets about once a year. And since she's on army bases, she collects friends there. She's told me that she is introverted by nature and nearly forces herself to do this stuff: at the end of her life, she wants to have friends to show for it.
So maybe the difference is true desire? Does that sound like it would fit you? Probably for me, because I get vulnerable with people fast, but at the same time, I hate rejection and will probably reject first :(
Not necessarily, I do feel like I make noble attempts. I don't know what it is. I put forth the time and effort.
Maybe it is me. Maybe I'm too judgmental. I hold high standards and a lot of times I won't waste my time on people who disappoint me. Maybe that something to do with it.
I always am the one who shows up, tries to fit in, then fades out
Yeah. I don't like this feeling. Even in a sociology class, I feel it. In lab, everyone is all chatty and has found 'friends' and even when we are to find a group, I don't find one. It's just me.
My sister has all kinds of different groups with friends. And they are all very interesting women! It makes me feel like I'm lacking so much! She puts a lot of work into sustaining the groups: high school friends, college, each group meets about once a year. And since she's on army bases, she collects friends there. She's told me that she is introverted by nature and nearly forces herself to do this stuff: at the end of her life, she wants to have friends to show for it.
So maybe the difference is true desire? Does that sound like it would fit you? Probably for me, because I get vulnerable with people fast, but at the same time, I hate rejection and will probably reject first :(
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Maybe it is me. Maybe I'm too judgmental. I hold high standards and a lot of times I won't waste my time on people who disappoint me. Maybe that something to do with it.
I just don't know.
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