I give up on this
Well I can't sleep at all tonight because of something completely unrelated to this entry. I have been working since about 1:30 on my shitty excuse for a cure for CF. I have been working on this for over four freaking years with no results and nothing even close to a somewhat theory. I have nothing. This work is pointless. I can't believe I actually thought I could cure anything. I can't believe I actually thought I could help. I think it is time for me to give up. I was stupid to think I could do this or even help. I can accept that I failed. I don't like it but I can accept it. I am stuck with this disease and there is nothing that can be done about it. I know those dreams are going to come back because I gave up but I will get through it again. Everytime I look at my "Breathe" bracelet or read articles about how they are trying to cure CF it used to fill me with hope but not anymore. They have been working on this for so long and nothing. NOTHING. I know these things take time but why can't they figure out anything. Just some step forward would give me alittle bit of hope. I'm just looking for that silver lining but it is not there. I GIVE UP!
I hope things get better because after my hospital visit things have not been going well. Things have sucked because it is so hard to keep this schedule and not be able to see my friends as much. The only thing that could make this worse is me forgetting to get the air out of my syringes. That is the only thing that could be worse, but I won't let that happen. I really hope things get better.
I hope things get better because after my hospital visit things have not been going well. Things have sucked because it is so hard to keep this schedule and not be able to see my friends as much. The only thing that could make this worse is me forgetting to get the air out of my syringes. That is the only thing that could be worse, but I won't let that happen. I really hope things get better.