Desperation....

[raincry]

I'm having a really hard time right now. I feel that dam about to break. That all consuming torrent threatens everything and yet I want to drown in it all. My stress level is through the roof and yet I'm trying to hold it altogether. I feel so responsible for all the people and all the creatures in my life. I feel like I have to remain the port in

Comments

[mscuriousity]

Oooooh hun, I am SO sad to read this :( I like thinking of you in your big sunglasses, smiling in the California sub surrounded by friends. That is the immediate image I see when I think of you--happy :)

I know how suffocating and frightening it feels when the world closes in. I too am enjoying unemployment which is due to end sop for me as well. We will have $200/mo to cover gas, food, entertainment, and any other add'l expenses. I don't think we are going to make it either and I am scared to death. Beau's attitude -- "it'll be fine". Really? Maybe if we all survive off of Ramen all month. Thank God the baby eats nothing but free boob.

Do you feel overwhelmed in caring for things? What I mean is -- maybe too many animals or the like? I stretched myself way too thin when I had my reptile room and a couple of cats... It sucked rejoining them but now I feel so much more free... No more cats, just my 3 Yorkie dogs & my snake family. I hated always feeling like I had to feed and clean and interact and vet and blah blah blah. I

[raincry]

Thanks Shelby your words do really help and are like a cyber hug. It's true I've been considering rehoming most of my geckos if only to also make a few bucks. I love Jared but I love him more in that good friend sort of way like I would want his life to be good and I care, but what we have lacks connection on soo many levels its more like a roommate