i'm an idiot
i hate to bitch, but i have to get my feelings out somehow. she says she loves me, but i don't really know what she feels. i know that i love her, and would give my right arm to have her back with me. i know that most people think that i should just move on, but it's allot harder than it seems. i mean, me and her went out for 3 years. you don't just get over somebody that you've spent 3 years with. i know that i hurt her, and i'm extreamly sorry for that, but i think it made us both better people for breaking up back then. i understand that she wants time with her friends. even with me, she can get that. i just wish she would give it a chance again. i was an idiot when we got back together. i swear on my life, that if we get back together, i will be the greatest boyfriend she has ever had. i'm willing to let her do anything that she wants to. that's the way relationships should be. i just want to be happy again. the only way that will happen, is if i'm with her. i wish she just knew how much i love her. i've never hurt like this with anyone else. that should mean something to her. if we don't get back together i just hope that the hurt doesn't kill me before i can get over it. i think it's going to take allot of time to get over this chick. even if i try and make myself, i can't. i can't drink away the hurt, and i can't sleep it off. what the hell can i do to make it stop hurting?!? i hope that someday soon, she will realize how much i love her, and want to be with me again. i really hope she reads all of this. it's all of my feelings toward her. i don't hate her for what she did, but i hate the hurt. i'm sorry for being a dick to her. she doesn't deserve that. well, to sum it up, i hope that i can have her back soon, or get over her soon. one of the two. i think we all know which one i would prefer.