Supah-fly (for lack of a better title...)
Title: Supah-fly
Author: a_life_defiant
Paring: TaeKey, JongHo Onew/various SuJu members
Genre: Crack, humor
Rating:R (for language and crudeness)
Summary: Superheros lead interesting lives. AKA, take a big bowl of cliche, add in some superpowers, and then *nom nom nom* (fail summary is fail)
A/N: For fangnicole (thankies for the inspo and plunnies) I hope I don't seriously disappoint you with this.....
***
Key lay in bed and stared at the ceiling. He knew he should be trying to get as much sleep as he could, but he couldn't relax. Taemin was out on patrol alone. He knew the younger boy was more than capable of taking care of himself. To be honest, Key had to admit with his powers of pyrokenisis and time manipulation he wouldn't want to meet Taemin in a dark alley. Key was no slouch in the powers department either. With his laser-beam eyes and cat-like agility he could take down some serious bad guys all on his lonesome. But he preferred to be with his partner.
He rolled over in bed as stared out into the black night sky. No stars shone, and it made everything seem more depressing - like when you realize you're out of cookie dough ice cream at 2 am and no stores are open. However, something on the other side of town burned brighter than the stars or moon could ever hope to achieve.
***
Blue flames licked up and down Taemin's forearms as he closed in on his opponent. He kept the fire close to his skin, not wanting to set off the fire alarms in the convenience store. The robber grabbed a bottle of Grey Goose off the shelf and quickly unscrewed the cap; dousing Taemin in the vodka. The slender boy laughed as he shot flames through the stream of alcohol, causing the bottle to burst in the assailants hand.
"Wow. You're stupid for real, huh numbnuts? Flammable liquid." He pointed a blazing hand at the wrecked bottle in the screaming man's hand.
"FIRE." Taemin waved a burning arc in the air with his arm.
"You know, for once, I would practically kill for a bad guy who made it past 3rd grade." Taemin sighed heavily.
He heard the faint drone of sirens getting nearer. He quickly extinguished the flames and grabbed a bag of Doritos off a nearby shelf along with a 2 liter of rootbeer. Flashing lights could be seen in he distance.
"Whelp, that's muh cue." He stated cheekily as he made a swift exit out the back.
***
High above the city streets, in his penthouse of sexual horrors the villainous DuBulge cackled as he observed Taemin through his looking glass.
"Be careful what you wish for, you sexy little minx." DuBulge purred as he rubbed his crotch menacingly.
***
Key heard a rustling in the kitchen and immediately got up, hoping it was Taemin. He found the younger boy in the kitchen munching away happily on his chips.
Key noted the bag and the soda. "Really?"
"What??" Taemin questioned around a mouthful of Cooler Ranch. "Service fees." He finished with a shrug.
"You are unbelievable." Key rolled his eyes.
Taemin crossed the space between them and pulled the older boy flush against his body. He nuzzled at Key's face, causing his expression to scrunch into one of distaste.
"Ew. You have Dorito breath."
Taemin blew in his face and suddenly the air was minty fresh.
"No fair using your powers when we're at home." Key pouted playfully.
Taemin's eyes grew large, filled with feigned innocence. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
Key just arched a brow as the younger boy closed in on his lips. Their mouths melded softly together, tongues flicking teasingly at one another. Taemin sucked Key's tongue into his mouth, swirling his own tongue around it. When they pulled back, Key was dizzy and breathless.
"Ok, I take it back. Totally fair."
Taemin gave a child-like smirk and then began to nibble along Key's shoulder.
"Why don't we take this to the bedroom?"
The older boy's pupils dilated with lust; a laser pulse bursting out briefly. Taemin laughed as the firey beams grazed his skin.
"Yeobo, you are so lucky I'm fire-proof."
***
The next day in another sector of town two other super-powered individuals were about to be fighting for their lives...
DuBulge's minions had shown up at the shopping mall where Minho and Jonghyun were picking up Minho's new phone. He'd lost the previous one the week prior, when he was beating the shit out of some guy who had tried to hit on Jonghyun.
The Super Sex Kittens (as DuBulge had re-named them) stalked the pair through the shopping complex. They were waiting for the right moment to strike; needing the heroic couple to be semi-secluded. Such a chance came when Jonghyun pulled Minho into the Versace store in search of new bad-ass shades. The SSK (formerly known as Super Junior) closed in, hustling the attendants out of the store until only Minho and Jonghyun were left.
Eunhyuk was the first to attack, fingers grabbing desperately at Minho's skin to poison the taller boy, rendering him unconscious. However, Minho's ability to regenerate and heal himself instantly made him immune. The taller boy pulled his arm back and then snapped it forward quickly; knocking his assailant out immediately with his super strength. Shindong attacked Minho next, using his telekinesis to throw racks of clothes in the taller boy's direction. While Minho was thoroughly distracted, Donghae took the opportunity to clamp a chloroformed cloth over Jonghyun's mouth, rendering his power of vocal persuasion useless; the blonde passing out from the effect of the drugs. He then used his power of invisibility and cloaked their forms. He began to drag Jonghyun off while Minho remained distracted by various attacks from the rest of the SSK. Leeteuk whistled, signaling the SSK to pull back their assault. Minho looked around in bewilderment.
"Jjong? JONGHYUN??!" His large doe-eyes searched the store for his partner.
Seconds later his new phone beeped loudly, alerting him to a text message. He clicked 'view', gulping down the vomit that was rising in his throat. The only person who had his new number was Jonghyun.
From: Jjongie
To: Min-all mine
We have your partner. Come to the penthouse of SHINee tower lofts at midnight, or he dies and you'll be sorry sorry.
Minho crumbled the electronic-laden plastic in his iron grip. Bits of the frog-green polymer cascading to the floor. Minho was angry. Whoever took his lover would soon find out - they won't like him when he's angry.
Tbc....
Author: a_life_defiant
Paring: TaeKey, JongHo Onew/various SuJu members
Genre: Crack, humor
Rating:R (for language and crudeness)
Summary: Superheros lead interesting lives. AKA, take a big bowl of cliche, add in some superpowers, and then *nom nom nom* (fail summary is fail)
A/N: For fangnicole (thankies for the inspo and plunnies) I hope I don't seriously disappoint you with this.....
***
Key lay in bed and stared at the ceiling. He knew he should be trying to get as much sleep as he could, but he couldn't relax. Taemin was out on patrol alone. He knew the younger boy was more than capable of taking care of himself. To be honest, Key had to admit with his powers of pyrokenisis and time manipulation he wouldn't want to meet Taemin in a dark alley. Key was no slouch in the powers department either. With his laser-beam eyes and cat-like agility he could take down some serious bad guys all on his lonesome. But he preferred to be with his partner.
He rolled over in bed as stared out into the black night sky. No stars shone, and it made everything seem more depressing - like when you realize you're out of cookie dough ice cream at 2 am and no stores are open. However, something on the other side of town burned brighter than the stars or moon could ever hope to achieve.
***
Blue flames licked up and down Taemin's forearms as he closed in on his opponent. He kept the fire close to his skin, not wanting to set off the fire alarms in the convenience store. The robber grabbed a bottle of Grey Goose off the shelf and quickly unscrewed the cap; dousing Taemin in the vodka. The slender boy laughed as he shot flames through the stream of alcohol, causing the bottle to burst in the assailants hand.
"Wow. You're stupid for real, huh numbnuts? Flammable liquid." He pointed a blazing hand at the wrecked bottle in the screaming man's hand.
"FIRE." Taemin waved a burning arc in the air with his arm.
"You know, for once, I would practically kill for a bad guy who made it past 3rd grade." Taemin sighed heavily.
He heard the faint drone of sirens getting nearer. He quickly extinguished the flames and grabbed a bag of Doritos off a nearby shelf along with a 2 liter of rootbeer. Flashing lights could be seen in he distance.
"Whelp, that's muh cue." He stated cheekily as he made a swift exit out the back.
***
High above the city streets, in his penthouse of sexual horrors the villainous DuBulge cackled as he observed Taemin through his looking glass.
"Be careful what you wish for, you sexy little minx." DuBulge purred as he rubbed his crotch menacingly.
***
Key heard a rustling in the kitchen and immediately got up, hoping it was Taemin. He found the younger boy in the kitchen munching away happily on his chips.
Key noted the bag and the soda. "Really?"
"What??" Taemin questioned around a mouthful of Cooler Ranch. "Service fees." He finished with a shrug.
"You are unbelievable." Key rolled his eyes.
Taemin crossed the space between them and pulled the older boy flush against his body. He nuzzled at Key's face, causing his expression to scrunch into one of distaste.
"Ew. You have Dorito breath."
Taemin blew in his face and suddenly the air was minty fresh.
"No fair using your powers when we're at home." Key pouted playfully.
Taemin's eyes grew large, filled with feigned innocence. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
Key just arched a brow as the younger boy closed in on his lips. Their mouths melded softly together, tongues flicking teasingly at one another. Taemin sucked Key's tongue into his mouth, swirling his own tongue around it. When they pulled back, Key was dizzy and breathless.
"Ok, I take it back. Totally fair."
Taemin gave a child-like smirk and then began to nibble along Key's shoulder.
"Why don't we take this to the bedroom?"
The older boy's pupils dilated with lust; a laser pulse bursting out briefly. Taemin laughed as the firey beams grazed his skin.
"Yeobo, you are so lucky I'm fire-proof."
***
The next day in another sector of town two other super-powered individuals were about to be fighting for their lives...
DuBulge's minions had shown up at the shopping mall where Minho and Jonghyun were picking up Minho's new phone. He'd lost the previous one the week prior, when he was beating the shit out of some guy who had tried to hit on Jonghyun.
The Super Sex Kittens (as DuBulge had re-named them) stalked the pair through the shopping complex. They were waiting for the right moment to strike; needing the heroic couple to be semi-secluded. Such a chance came when Jonghyun pulled Minho into the Versace store in search of new bad-ass shades. The SSK (formerly known as Super Junior) closed in, hustling the attendants out of the store until only Minho and Jonghyun were left.
Eunhyuk was the first to attack, fingers grabbing desperately at Minho's skin to poison the taller boy, rendering him unconscious. However, Minho's ability to regenerate and heal himself instantly made him immune. The taller boy pulled his arm back and then snapped it forward quickly; knocking his assailant out immediately with his super strength. Shindong attacked Minho next, using his telekinesis to throw racks of clothes in the taller boy's direction. While Minho was thoroughly distracted, Donghae took the opportunity to clamp a chloroformed cloth over Jonghyun's mouth, rendering his power of vocal persuasion useless; the blonde passing out from the effect of the drugs. He then used his power of invisibility and cloaked their forms. He began to drag Jonghyun off while Minho remained distracted by various attacks from the rest of the SSK. Leeteuk whistled, signaling the SSK to pull back their assault. Minho looked around in bewilderment.
"Jjong? JONGHYUN??!" His large doe-eyes searched the store for his partner.
Seconds later his new phone beeped loudly, alerting him to a text message. He clicked 'view', gulping down the vomit that was rising in his throat. The only person who had his new number was Jonghyun.
From: Jjongie
To: Min-all mine
We have your partner. Come to the penthouse of SHINee tower lofts at midnight, or he dies and you'll be sorry sorry.
Minho crumbled the electronic-laden plastic in his iron grip. Bits of the frog-green polymer cascading to the floor. Minho was angry. Whoever took his lover would soon find out - they won't like him when he's angry.
Tbc....