Spanish moment
Saw this somewhere. I think it applies to the Spanish ppl I've met, too. :P
Los Cubanos pueden ultilizar la palabra "Coño" para:
Sorprendido,
Dolor,
Bravo,
Miedo,
Admiracion,
y una pila de otraz cosas.
Me encanta la palabra, no hay nada parecido en ingles.
Naturally, it's one of those words that I had never gotten used to injecting. :P Kinda like "vale". :P
Meanwhile, another discovery:
HOW TO BE A CUBAN
This is for those of you who want to be Cuban (It's just a joke)
It is no longer necessary to be born on the island of Cuba to be considered cuban. If you have dark, preferably curly hair, and appetite for black beans and rice, an adiction to cuban coffee, (Rocket fuel compared to american coffee), you may have the makings of a cuban.
To begin with, it is necessary to learn the basics of the spanish language. Phrases such as "De pinga el caso", "Coño", "No jodas mas", are imperative if you intend to become cubanized.
You must keep anywhere from 12 to 16 cans of Goya products in your cupboard. (Diana products are acceptable). Also, you must own, or display anywhere from 3 to 10 statues of various saints on your car's dashboard. It also helps to be afiliated with one of the afro-cuban gods of Santeria. You may choose from Chango, Elegua, etc.
Your name must include at least two middle names. Ex. Maria De La Luz, Caridad Del Carmen, Doleres Sol Angel. Along with your middle names, you should also have a couple of last names, ex. Perez Sanchez, Soto Ortiz.
The tonal quality of your voice should increase a couple of decibels.
A definite must in the process of cubanization, is to develop a love for guava pastries, (pastelitos cubanos), and a longing to see the homeland. Even if you've never seen the homeland before.
You must definetely indicate a strong dislike to socialists and communists ideas, and know at least someone who took part in the "Bay of Pigs Invasion".
Upon signing up to obtain american citizenship (if you are not already an american born) you should obtain an LP which will teach you the answers to all the questions which will be asked in the exam.
If you are of the male sex, you must show some liking for a large ass, and overly ripe breasts. Every time you encounter a female (regardless of beauty or age) you should whistle loudly and yell a couple of well phrased obscenities. Such as "Nina, que culo", or "Tremendas tetas".
In the final process you should try to get a couple of large medallions and necklaces, and hang them from your neck. Usually a large boat anchor charm will work beautifully. Also you must wear your shirt with the top three buttons undone.
Being cuban is not easy, but you will find it to be, in the long run, the most worthwhile and well fed minorities.
Oh, goodie, I'm well on my way. :P *Laughs* The Goya products comment had me laughing for a few minutes. That was so true in my childhood...not so sure why I haven't seen so many of those products in our cupboad in recent years. And the guava pastries...hehehe, that's so my dad. :P
Los Cubanos pueden ultilizar la palabra "Coño" para:
Sorprendido,
Dolor,
Bravo,
Miedo,
Admiracion,
y una pila de otraz cosas.
Me encanta la palabra, no hay nada parecido en ingles.
Naturally, it's one of those words that I had never gotten used to injecting. :P Kinda like "vale". :P
Meanwhile, another discovery:
HOW TO BE A CUBAN
This is for those of you who want to be Cuban (It's just a joke)
It is no longer necessary to be born on the island of Cuba to be considered cuban. If you have dark, preferably curly hair, and appetite for black beans and rice, an adiction to cuban coffee, (Rocket fuel compared to american coffee), you may have the makings of a cuban.
To begin with, it is necessary to learn the basics of the spanish language. Phrases such as "De pinga el caso", "Coño", "No jodas mas", are imperative if you intend to become cubanized.
You must keep anywhere from 12 to 16 cans of Goya products in your cupboard. (Diana products are acceptable). Also, you must own, or display anywhere from 3 to 10 statues of various saints on your car's dashboard. It also helps to be afiliated with one of the afro-cuban gods of Santeria. You may choose from Chango, Elegua, etc.
Your name must include at least two middle names. Ex. Maria De La Luz, Caridad Del Carmen, Doleres Sol Angel. Along with your middle names, you should also have a couple of last names, ex. Perez Sanchez, Soto Ortiz.
The tonal quality of your voice should increase a couple of decibels.
A definite must in the process of cubanization, is to develop a love for guava pastries, (pastelitos cubanos), and a longing to see the homeland. Even if you've never seen the homeland before.
You must definetely indicate a strong dislike to socialists and communists ideas, and know at least someone who took part in the "Bay of Pigs Invasion".
Upon signing up to obtain american citizenship (if you are not already an american born) you should obtain an LP which will teach you the answers to all the questions which will be asked in the exam.
If you are of the male sex, you must show some liking for a large ass, and overly ripe breasts. Every time you encounter a female (regardless of beauty or age) you should whistle loudly and yell a couple of well phrased obscenities. Such as "Nina, que culo", or "Tremendas tetas".
In the final process you should try to get a couple of large medallions and necklaces, and hang them from your neck. Usually a large boat anchor charm will work beautifully. Also you must wear your shirt with the top three buttons undone.
Being cuban is not easy, but you will find it to be, in the long run, the most worthwhile and well fed minorities.
Oh, goodie, I'm well on my way. :P *Laughs* The Goya products comment had me laughing for a few minutes. That was so true in my childhood...not so sure why I haven't seen so many of those products in our cupboad in recent years. And the guava pastries...hehehe, that's so my dad. :P