Fic - "Apples" - Robin Hood
Title: Apples
Fandom: Robin Hood
Rating: K+
Pairing: Slight Robin/Marian
Summary: A bit of a crack!fic. Set sometime after the end of series 1, and before the start of series 2. The gang happens upon a contingent of appples travelling through Sherwood, and share their prize eagerly, resulting in catastrophic events.. In the meantime, Will makes friends with a cat.
Author's Note: Written for the prompt "Apple" from philippa_
“Apple crumble. Just think of it; warm, brown, sweet and succulent. That’s what we’ll have. All we need is a bit of sugar to sprinkle on the top and then we’ll have the best apple crumble England’s ever seen.”
“Much, don’t you think you’re getting just a little too excited. It’s only apples!” Robin gave him a bemused grin as they all tramped through the woods, bearing a large sack of round fruit, green and juicy, fresh and delicious.
“I can understand his excitement. In my country, fresh fruit that had not been spoilt through drought or disease was a gift from Allah.” Djaq sympathised with the gleeful Much, who was currently planning one hundred and one different meals they could have with the apples. Several sack loads full of apples had been.. obtained by the outlaws, whilst they had been journeying through Sherwood. Confused as to why such a large contingent of fruit was going to Nottingham, they had taken it, and were on their way to giving it out at the various villages in the county.
They neared their first point of call, Knighton, and Robin’s grin became wider and his eyes brighter as he peered around. Knowing that there was every chance of bumping into Marian in her own village filled him with excitement, as if he was a young boy, which, in a very large number of ways, he still was. He turned round to his gang, which had dispersed somewhat since they’d entered the village. “Let’s give some to Marian,” he called out, hitching the sack higher on his shoulder.
“Marian’s at home alone today, Robin.” Will replied, looking up from where he was conversing with a peasant. “This lady says Sir Edward left for town this morning, for an important meeting about the farm taxes, but Lady Marian stayed behind as she was ill. No one saw her leave the house.”
Robin’s eyes twinkled at the prospect of paying a visit to Marian whilst she was ill in her bed. “Good, we can give her some and hope she feels better, then.” He looked up towards the eaves of Knighton Hall, then back at the others. “Just give us a sec.”
Robin had spent a large portion of his childhood scrambling up and down the gables underneath Marian’s window, and despite having been away in the Holy Land for a number of years, the skill of such a feat had not been lost. Within seconds he was pulling himself up over her window ledge, and the gang saw his boots disappearing into Marian’s room as he rolled in.
Djaq shook her head. “That man has no tact; Marian will hardly wish for a dirty outlaw to pay her a visit if she is ill.”
“Illness would never stop Robin from seeing Marian. When she was six, she caught the measles, and everyone thought she would die. She was kept in quarantine, and Robin was banned from seeing her, but one night, he crept up to her room, and Sir Edward found him the next morning, kneeling by the side of her bed, holding her hand, his head rested on the bed, fast asleep.” Much smiled. “Robin was beaten for doing that, and he was lucky he never caught the measles either, but after that Marian got better so quickly, everyone said it was a miracle. Robin claimed it was his doing, of course, and that his presence had cured her immediately, and I think he was not far off the truth, despite the wildness of his claims. Marian was always in good spirits when she was with him.”
“Here, kitty, kitty.”
They all turned around to see who was speaking, and looked at Will crouched on the ground next to an old, stray, orange tabby cat, digesting part of an apple Will had managed to sneak out of the bag before Robin had taken it up to Marian. He looked up to see them all looking at him and shrugged his shoulders. “What?”
xxx
In Marian’s room, everything was silent and still, apart from the outlaw stealing across the floor. “Marian! Marian!” he hissed, reaching the bed, and peering into the sheets and blankets piled up on there. “Marian, wake up, it’s me!”
“Robin, what on earth are you doing here?”
Robin spun around as the voice came from the other end of the room, and saw Marian standing in the doorway, dressed in her Nightwatchman clothes, her brown mask held in her hand.
“Marian,” he started over towards her. “I thought you were supposed to be ill in bed?” He gave her a rueful look.
Marian looked guilty. “Well, obviously not, as you can see. I stayed behind to go out and hand out food to Nettlestone. The butcher’s been evicted.”
Robin nodded. “We’ll go round and give him some money later.”
“Robin, what exactly is in that sack?” Marian was giving the dirty bag a concerned look, where Robin had left it by the widow.
“Oh, it’s apples.” He flashed her a grin, and went to retrieve one for her. “We found a cart going to Nottingham, and presumed it was money, so we ambushed ‘em, but found them instead. We’re on our way to handing them out now, but since we heard you were ill, we thought you might like some yourself.” He held one out for her.
Marian smiled. “That’s very kind Robin, but I couldn’t possibly take one when you’ve got the whole of Nottingham to feed.”
“Marian, it’s hardly as if we’re not going to have enough. Have you seen how many are in there?” He gave the bag a nudge with his foot to prove his point, and there was a rumbling noise as several fell over each other and tumbled around inside the bag.
Marian acceded. “Alright, then.” She took the apple, and after looking at it as if it was about to attack her, took a bite. She grinned; “Delicious, Robin.”
He beamed, his hands on his hips.
“Robin! Got a bit of a problem here!” The loud boom of John alerted the outlaw and he scurried to the window and put his head out.
“What?” He called out, looking down at the crowd of his gang below.
Will simply held up a half-eaten apple and the limp body of a cat.
There was a dull thudding noise from behind him, and Robin spun around just in time to see Marian fall to the floor, her face white, the apple falling from her hand as she did so. He dropped down to his knees by her side, shaking her shoulders. “Marian, please, open your eyes. Marian!”
She lay there on the ground as if one dead, her eyes closed and all colour faded from her cheeks. He put his ear to her mouth, and cried out as he felt no breath come from her lips. Stumbling to his feet, he reached the window and put his head out again. “Djaq! Come quickly! It’s Marian!”
Immediately, the Saracen clambered up the side of the house, and the others followed in swift pursuit, all of them looking grim with worry. This ideal day was not going so well.
Djaq jumped into the room, and went to Robin and Marian immediately. She listened for breathing, and then shook her head. “She is unconscious, and has stopped breathing. We need to find a way to start her lungs up again. Will, Allan, go downstairs and get some cold water in basin. John, Much, I need you to look for a little purple flower for me. I have seen it on the hillside near the forest. Go, quickly!”
Obediently, they all scrambled off, though Will stood still for a moment as he wondered what to do with the cat held in his arms.
“Will, leave the cat with me, now go!”
The carpenter deposited the cat swiftly by Djaq and then followed Allan out of the door and tore down the stairs to the kitchen.
“Djaq, what’s wrong with her? Is she going to die?”
Djaq gave Robin a serious look, then turned back to Marian and slapped her hard across the cheek to try and wake her up, but gained no response. She sat back on her heels. “It must be the apples, Robin. First the cat, now Marian… They must have been poisoned.”
“Poisoned? But why?”
Djaq rolled her eyes. “Robin, please do not tell me you do not know the answer to that. Who else but us would seize a cart passing through Sherwood? And who wants us dead, very, very badly?”
Robin’s eyes darkened. “The Sheriff.”
Djaq nodded, then she turned her attention back to Marian. “What we need to do is give her an antidote, to balance the poison out.”
Robin took Marian’s hand in his own and rubbed it gently. “The purple flower.”
“Precisely.”
“Then what’s the cold water for?”
Djaq looked at him. “The cold water is for the cat.”
Xxx
Much took great heaves of breaths, clutching his chest as he stumbled along the hillside. John was ahead of him, scouring the land with his eyes as he ran. “John, it’s not here. We must face it.” Much stopped and wiped his brow with a hand. “We’ll have to look somewhere else.”
John carried on oblivious, and Much sighed and started to run again.
“There!” John bellowed, pointing at a little hollow near the edge of the woods. Much followed him and saw a patch of small, star shaped flowers growing in the shade.
He collapsed onto the ground as John started to rip great tufts of them out of the ground, and threw his head back. “God be praised,” he muttered, trying to get his breath back, but he was hardly given a moment before John started running back the way they had come.
“Much! Come on!”
Getting to his feet, Much grumbled for just one quiet day.
Xxx
“Djaq! We’ve got it!” A hand appeared over the window ledge, purple flowers sprouting out from between fingers.
“Quickly, give it to me.” Djaq rushed over to the disembodied hand and seized several of the flowers, before returning to Marian. With a crash, Allan and Will arrived in the room once again, water slopping everywhere from the basin held in Will’s hands. He set the basin down and watched intently, as Djaq bent over Marian’s head.
Carefully, she tugged at one of the lady’s lips and, her brow furrowed in concentration, squeezed the head of the flower. A single purple droplet fell out, and trickled down Marian’s lips, into her mouth. Djaq did this again, and with a rush of excitement from the surrounding outlaws, for Much and John had managed to get into the room by now, they all noticed a flush of red return to Marian’s cheeks.
Djaq sat back and beamed, as John gave her a pat on the back. Robin sat up and manoeuvred himself so that he was leaning over her head, and then, very slowly, lowered his mouth towards hers. When they were barely a hair’s breadth apart, he closed his eyes, and closed the final distance -
There was a loud smack of the sound of palm of hand colliding with cheek, and Robin tumbled backwards, rolling onto the feet of Much. He looked back over at Marian, whose eyes were now open, and who was looking at him with something between amusement and exasperation. “Robin, I am not Snow White.”
“I was just trying to wake you up,” he explained, his eyes large as he rubbed his cheek. “That hurt.”
“I’m sorry.” She looked up to Djaq. “Thank you. All of you,” she swept her gaze over the whole of them assembled there. “I have a feeling you saved my life, once again.”
Djaq shook her head, brushing it aside. “It is no big deal. Now, Will, pass me that cat.”
Will picked the cat up and handed it over to Djaq, who went and sat on the side of Marian’s bed, cradling the cat in her lap. Once again, she squeezed another of the purple flowers, letting some of the liquid drop onto the cat’s mouth, and after a few moments of hushed silence, during which Will watched like a hawk, his hands bunched up in white fists, the cat gave a quiet mew, and stretched widely, extending its claws. They all laughed, as Will picked it up and brought it to his chest, giving it a warm hug.
Robin returned to Marian’s side, and squeezed her hand. “Are you alright?”
“I’m perfectly well, Robin, don’t worry about me.” She smiled at him. “What are you going to do about the apples though?”
Robin looked over at the others, sadly. “I’m afraid apple crumble’s off for tonight, boys.”
Much looked downcast, and gave the sack of apples a kick for good riddance. “I could just smell that pudding.” His voice was low and morose.
“Well,” said Marian, leaning on Robin’s shoulder for support as she got to her feet, “we’ve got more than enough apples downstairs. Would you like to use those for cooking? I promise they’re not poisoned.” She gave Robin a mischievous glance.
Much looked ecstatic, and clasped Marian’s hands to his chest. “Oh really, my lady? Oh, you are so good. Thank you, thank you, thank you!” He bolted to the doorway, and was already half way down the stairs before his words had finished ringing around the room.
Robin shook his head, and with Marian on his arm, led the way downstairs. “I’m sorry if you have no apples left, but you see it has been some time since we had a decent pudding.”
Marian laughed. “Don’t worry about that, what I would worry about is the fact that Will seems to have taken a liking to that cat.”
Robin spun around to Will, following them down the stairs, the cat still held protectively in his arms. “No. Absolutely not. We are not having pets in the camp!”
The sound of laughter joined that of food parcels being turned over vigorously in the kitchen, as Much ransacked Knighton Hall’s pantry. What Marian didn’t know was that Allan had already claimed some of her food earlier on, whilst getting a bowl of water for Djaq. They were all rather hungry, after all.
Fandom: Robin Hood
Rating: K+
Pairing: Slight Robin/Marian
Summary: A bit of a crack!fic. Set sometime after the end of series 1, and before the start of series 2. The gang happens upon a contingent of appples travelling through Sherwood, and share their prize eagerly, resulting in catastrophic events.. In the meantime, Will makes friends with a cat.
Author's Note: Written for the prompt "Apple" from philippa_
“Apple crumble. Just think of it; warm, brown, sweet and succulent. That’s what we’ll have. All we need is a bit of sugar to sprinkle on the top and then we’ll have the best apple crumble England’s ever seen.”
“Much, don’t you think you’re getting just a little too excited. It’s only apples!” Robin gave him a bemused grin as they all tramped through the woods, bearing a large sack of round fruit, green and juicy, fresh and delicious.
“I can understand his excitement. In my country, fresh fruit that had not been spoilt through drought or disease was a gift from Allah.” Djaq sympathised with the gleeful Much, who was currently planning one hundred and one different meals they could have with the apples. Several sack loads full of apples had been.. obtained by the outlaws, whilst they had been journeying through Sherwood. Confused as to why such a large contingent of fruit was going to Nottingham, they had taken it, and were on their way to giving it out at the various villages in the county.
They neared their first point of call, Knighton, and Robin’s grin became wider and his eyes brighter as he peered around. Knowing that there was every chance of bumping into Marian in her own village filled him with excitement, as if he was a young boy, which, in a very large number of ways, he still was. He turned round to his gang, which had dispersed somewhat since they’d entered the village. “Let’s give some to Marian,” he called out, hitching the sack higher on his shoulder.
“Marian’s at home alone today, Robin.” Will replied, looking up from where he was conversing with a peasant. “This lady says Sir Edward left for town this morning, for an important meeting about the farm taxes, but Lady Marian stayed behind as she was ill. No one saw her leave the house.”
Robin’s eyes twinkled at the prospect of paying a visit to Marian whilst she was ill in her bed. “Good, we can give her some and hope she feels better, then.” He looked up towards the eaves of Knighton Hall, then back at the others. “Just give us a sec.”
Robin had spent a large portion of his childhood scrambling up and down the gables underneath Marian’s window, and despite having been away in the Holy Land for a number of years, the skill of such a feat had not been lost. Within seconds he was pulling himself up over her window ledge, and the gang saw his boots disappearing into Marian’s room as he rolled in.
Djaq shook her head. “That man has no tact; Marian will hardly wish for a dirty outlaw to pay her a visit if she is ill.”
“Illness would never stop Robin from seeing Marian. When she was six, she caught the measles, and everyone thought she would die. She was kept in quarantine, and Robin was banned from seeing her, but one night, he crept up to her room, and Sir Edward found him the next morning, kneeling by the side of her bed, holding her hand, his head rested on the bed, fast asleep.” Much smiled. “Robin was beaten for doing that, and he was lucky he never caught the measles either, but after that Marian got better so quickly, everyone said it was a miracle. Robin claimed it was his doing, of course, and that his presence had cured her immediately, and I think he was not far off the truth, despite the wildness of his claims. Marian was always in good spirits when she was with him.”
“Here, kitty, kitty.”
They all turned around to see who was speaking, and looked at Will crouched on the ground next to an old, stray, orange tabby cat, digesting part of an apple Will had managed to sneak out of the bag before Robin had taken it up to Marian. He looked up to see them all looking at him and shrugged his shoulders. “What?”
xxx
In Marian’s room, everything was silent and still, apart from the outlaw stealing across the floor. “Marian! Marian!” he hissed, reaching the bed, and peering into the sheets and blankets piled up on there. “Marian, wake up, it’s me!”
“Robin, what on earth are you doing here?”
Robin spun around as the voice came from the other end of the room, and saw Marian standing in the doorway, dressed in her Nightwatchman clothes, her brown mask held in her hand.
“Marian,” he started over towards her. “I thought you were supposed to be ill in bed?” He gave her a rueful look.
Marian looked guilty. “Well, obviously not, as you can see. I stayed behind to go out and hand out food to Nettlestone. The butcher’s been evicted.”
Robin nodded. “We’ll go round and give him some money later.”
“Robin, what exactly is in that sack?” Marian was giving the dirty bag a concerned look, where Robin had left it by the widow.
“Oh, it’s apples.” He flashed her a grin, and went to retrieve one for her. “We found a cart going to Nottingham, and presumed it was money, so we ambushed ‘em, but found them instead. We’re on our way to handing them out now, but since we heard you were ill, we thought you might like some yourself.” He held one out for her.
Marian smiled. “That’s very kind Robin, but I couldn’t possibly take one when you’ve got the whole of Nottingham to feed.”
“Marian, it’s hardly as if we’re not going to have enough. Have you seen how many are in there?” He gave the bag a nudge with his foot to prove his point, and there was a rumbling noise as several fell over each other and tumbled around inside the bag.
Marian acceded. “Alright, then.” She took the apple, and after looking at it as if it was about to attack her, took a bite. She grinned; “Delicious, Robin.”
He beamed, his hands on his hips.
“Robin! Got a bit of a problem here!” The loud boom of John alerted the outlaw and he scurried to the window and put his head out.
“What?” He called out, looking down at the crowd of his gang below.
Will simply held up a half-eaten apple and the limp body of a cat.
There was a dull thudding noise from behind him, and Robin spun around just in time to see Marian fall to the floor, her face white, the apple falling from her hand as she did so. He dropped down to his knees by her side, shaking her shoulders. “Marian, please, open your eyes. Marian!”
She lay there on the ground as if one dead, her eyes closed and all colour faded from her cheeks. He put his ear to her mouth, and cried out as he felt no breath come from her lips. Stumbling to his feet, he reached the window and put his head out again. “Djaq! Come quickly! It’s Marian!”
Immediately, the Saracen clambered up the side of the house, and the others followed in swift pursuit, all of them looking grim with worry. This ideal day was not going so well.
Djaq jumped into the room, and went to Robin and Marian immediately. She listened for breathing, and then shook her head. “She is unconscious, and has stopped breathing. We need to find a way to start her lungs up again. Will, Allan, go downstairs and get some cold water in basin. John, Much, I need you to look for a little purple flower for me. I have seen it on the hillside near the forest. Go, quickly!”
Obediently, they all scrambled off, though Will stood still for a moment as he wondered what to do with the cat held in his arms.
“Will, leave the cat with me, now go!”
The carpenter deposited the cat swiftly by Djaq and then followed Allan out of the door and tore down the stairs to the kitchen.
“Djaq, what’s wrong with her? Is she going to die?”
Djaq gave Robin a serious look, then turned back to Marian and slapped her hard across the cheek to try and wake her up, but gained no response. She sat back on her heels. “It must be the apples, Robin. First the cat, now Marian… They must have been poisoned.”
“Poisoned? But why?”
Djaq rolled her eyes. “Robin, please do not tell me you do not know the answer to that. Who else but us would seize a cart passing through Sherwood? And who wants us dead, very, very badly?”
Robin’s eyes darkened. “The Sheriff.”
Djaq nodded, then she turned her attention back to Marian. “What we need to do is give her an antidote, to balance the poison out.”
Robin took Marian’s hand in his own and rubbed it gently. “The purple flower.”
“Precisely.”
“Then what’s the cold water for?”
Djaq looked at him. “The cold water is for the cat.”
Xxx
Much took great heaves of breaths, clutching his chest as he stumbled along the hillside. John was ahead of him, scouring the land with his eyes as he ran. “John, it’s not here. We must face it.” Much stopped and wiped his brow with a hand. “We’ll have to look somewhere else.”
John carried on oblivious, and Much sighed and started to run again.
“There!” John bellowed, pointing at a little hollow near the edge of the woods. Much followed him and saw a patch of small, star shaped flowers growing in the shade.
He collapsed onto the ground as John started to rip great tufts of them out of the ground, and threw his head back. “God be praised,” he muttered, trying to get his breath back, but he was hardly given a moment before John started running back the way they had come.
“Much! Come on!”
Getting to his feet, Much grumbled for just one quiet day.
Xxx
“Djaq! We’ve got it!” A hand appeared over the window ledge, purple flowers sprouting out from between fingers.
“Quickly, give it to me.” Djaq rushed over to the disembodied hand and seized several of the flowers, before returning to Marian. With a crash, Allan and Will arrived in the room once again, water slopping everywhere from the basin held in Will’s hands. He set the basin down and watched intently, as Djaq bent over Marian’s head.
Carefully, she tugged at one of the lady’s lips and, her brow furrowed in concentration, squeezed the head of the flower. A single purple droplet fell out, and trickled down Marian’s lips, into her mouth. Djaq did this again, and with a rush of excitement from the surrounding outlaws, for Much and John had managed to get into the room by now, they all noticed a flush of red return to Marian’s cheeks.
Djaq sat back and beamed, as John gave her a pat on the back. Robin sat up and manoeuvred himself so that he was leaning over her head, and then, very slowly, lowered his mouth towards hers. When they were barely a hair’s breadth apart, he closed his eyes, and closed the final distance -
There was a loud smack of the sound of palm of hand colliding with cheek, and Robin tumbled backwards, rolling onto the feet of Much. He looked back over at Marian, whose eyes were now open, and who was looking at him with something between amusement and exasperation. “Robin, I am not Snow White.”
“I was just trying to wake you up,” he explained, his eyes large as he rubbed his cheek. “That hurt.”
“I’m sorry.” She looked up to Djaq. “Thank you. All of you,” she swept her gaze over the whole of them assembled there. “I have a feeling you saved my life, once again.”
Djaq shook her head, brushing it aside. “It is no big deal. Now, Will, pass me that cat.”
Will picked the cat up and handed it over to Djaq, who went and sat on the side of Marian’s bed, cradling the cat in her lap. Once again, she squeezed another of the purple flowers, letting some of the liquid drop onto the cat’s mouth, and after a few moments of hushed silence, during which Will watched like a hawk, his hands bunched up in white fists, the cat gave a quiet mew, and stretched widely, extending its claws. They all laughed, as Will picked it up and brought it to his chest, giving it a warm hug.
Robin returned to Marian’s side, and squeezed her hand. “Are you alright?”
“I’m perfectly well, Robin, don’t worry about me.” She smiled at him. “What are you going to do about the apples though?”
Robin looked over at the others, sadly. “I’m afraid apple crumble’s off for tonight, boys.”
Much looked downcast, and gave the sack of apples a kick for good riddance. “I could just smell that pudding.” His voice was low and morose.
“Well,” said Marian, leaning on Robin’s shoulder for support as she got to her feet, “we’ve got more than enough apples downstairs. Would you like to use those for cooking? I promise they’re not poisoned.” She gave Robin a mischievous glance.
Much looked ecstatic, and clasped Marian’s hands to his chest. “Oh really, my lady? Oh, you are so good. Thank you, thank you, thank you!” He bolted to the doorway, and was already half way down the stairs before his words had finished ringing around the room.
Robin shook his head, and with Marian on his arm, led the way downstairs. “I’m sorry if you have no apples left, but you see it has been some time since we had a decent pudding.”
Marian laughed. “Don’t worry about that, what I would worry about is the fact that Will seems to have taken a liking to that cat.”
Robin spun around to Will, following them down the stairs, the cat still held protectively in his arms. “No. Absolutely not. We are not having pets in the camp!”
The sound of laughter joined that of food parcels being turned over vigorously in the kitchen, as Much ransacked Knighton Hall’s pantry. What Marian didn’t know was that Allan had already claimed some of her food earlier on, whilst getting a bowl of water for Djaq. They were all rather hungry, after all.