(no subject)
i honestly dont know what to think right now.
the relationships i have with people are so ridiculous.
i dont know how i can not piss you off every other day. it seems like everytime we talk, youre in a bad mood and are rude to me, or im in a bad mood and im rude to you. either way, its frustrating that our friendship has come to this. everytime we talk, it seems like one of us gets pissed off...i dont know what to do anymore. i want to be there for you, and i want to be a part of your life, but everytime i try to help, it seems like you dont want to listen or i say something completely wrong and rude. maybe im just asking for a fight right now, but frankly, this is my journal, and im intending to use it to say how i feel. im not angry...just more along the lines of upset and confused.
yeah.
i dont know if i like the fact that college social life in auburn is revolved around getting fucked up every weekend. yeah, sure, getting drunk is fun and all, but every weekend and some weeknights?
i know im a hypocrit while saying this...but whatever. ive seen a lot of drunk people make a complete ass/idiot out of themselves, and it got me to thinking if its actually worth it. i know i look and act like an idiot when im drunk...im one of those people who think that everyone is their friend. embarrassing, really. some people are giggly, horny, others dance a lot, etc., and still others on the opposite spectrum are what i like to call sad bastard drunks. point being, has anyone actually ever looked back on their behavior while drunk, and been proud of it? i guess you can be proud of the fact that you funnelled 5 beers or something...but what im talking about are the actions. its a misrepresentation of what you really act like.
i guess the point of all this random, nonsensical rambling is not to necessarily say that i will never get drunk again (that would be a horrible lie), but to kind of question why some people revolve their free time getting fucked up. yeah. i guess the whole party party puke scene is just really played out for me right now. realistically, i probably wouldnt be feeling this way if i was messed up with the rest of them. i think my attitude in this entry stems from my hatred of being the only sober one. eh. what can you do?
today has been productive. im still not close to being done with anything, but im well on my way. yay for not being a complete lazy bum.
oh, and auburn won last night against tennessee, and it was an incerdible game. more and more i find myself actually enjoying football. weird. auburn football is just so exciting though. i think we might be ranked number 6 right now? score. i hope we win the sec championship...i think all of college street would be covered in toilet paper. heh.
so i think ill stop wasting precious friends list page space with junk....
bye!
the relationships i have with people are so ridiculous.
i dont know how i can not piss you off every other day. it seems like everytime we talk, youre in a bad mood and are rude to me, or im in a bad mood and im rude to you. either way, its frustrating that our friendship has come to this. everytime we talk, it seems like one of us gets pissed off...i dont know what to do anymore. i want to be there for you, and i want to be a part of your life, but everytime i try to help, it seems like you dont want to listen or i say something completely wrong and rude. maybe im just asking for a fight right now, but frankly, this is my journal, and im intending to use it to say how i feel. im not angry...just more along the lines of upset and confused.
yeah.
i dont know if i like the fact that college social life in auburn is revolved around getting fucked up every weekend. yeah, sure, getting drunk is fun and all, but every weekend and some weeknights?
i know im a hypocrit while saying this...but whatever. ive seen a lot of drunk people make a complete ass/idiot out of themselves, and it got me to thinking if its actually worth it. i know i look and act like an idiot when im drunk...im one of those people who think that everyone is their friend. embarrassing, really. some people are giggly, horny, others dance a lot, etc., and still others on the opposite spectrum are what i like to call sad bastard drunks. point being, has anyone actually ever looked back on their behavior while drunk, and been proud of it? i guess you can be proud of the fact that you funnelled 5 beers or something...but what im talking about are the actions. its a misrepresentation of what you really act like.
i guess the point of all this random, nonsensical rambling is not to necessarily say that i will never get drunk again (that would be a horrible lie), but to kind of question why some people revolve their free time getting fucked up. yeah. i guess the whole party party puke scene is just really played out for me right now. realistically, i probably wouldnt be feeling this way if i was messed up with the rest of them. i think my attitude in this entry stems from my hatred of being the only sober one. eh. what can you do?
today has been productive. im still not close to being done with anything, but im well on my way. yay for not being a complete lazy bum.
oh, and auburn won last night against tennessee, and it was an incerdible game. more and more i find myself actually enjoying football. weird. auburn football is just so exciting though. i think we might be ranked number 6 right now? score. i hope we win the sec championship...i think all of college street would be covered in toilet paper. heh.
so i think ill stop wasting precious friends list page space with junk....
bye!