ho humm....

[rachellikewhoa]

today i am at school...
i missed a few days there
more like a week
which is not good
very not good
i am wearing a white shirt that says love on it in pink letters
i feel like a little girl
like a high school girl
i think its because of the shirt
my stomach is getting bigger
ugh
things arent going good
not good at all

i have to do something i dont want to do
and i think i just might kill myself for it
i need god to help me
and forgive me

randy is back
back in my life
and he is proving to me each and every day
that he really loves me
in his way
a way probably no other girl would understand and appreciate
but its his way
and this time i see he is really trying
i think he is serious

i am really hungry and i have no money
i did have money in the morning but i ate
i ate
and im hungry some more

tomorrow is going to be a bad day
i hope no one asks me about my baby after tomorrow
i just might start to cry
and I'll loose it
after my bad tomorrow
i think it will be very hard for me to find a reason to be alive

i wish i had some friends
but i have none
i never had any
and i will never have any
i wish i had a friend who knows what this is like
who knows what my everyday is like
who knows what tomorrow is going to be like
a friend to give me a hug tomorrow
a real hug that means they know how it is
a hug that makes you feel like it will all be ok
because tomorrow that is what i will need

i need some prayers too...
oh man i need god

i am depress and i need god.

yes....

thats it.

<3
<3