And This Bird You Cannot Change...
it's holiday break. brandon came up north only a few days after i did since he didn't have to work much. i wish i could freely hang out with my friends, but i want to be with him, perhaps because i don't trust him, perhaps because i feel bad. he's flirting with my friend sam now...maybe he's not...i guess i'm just so selfish that if he's not flirting with me, he must be flirting with others. i'm so childish. sick. why wouldn't anyone date me? even if they were lonely... we're at sam's house, he's playing guitar hero with sam, i'm typing on my livejournal being emo. he has ignored me much of the night. i feel good. there's no winning unless i am playing video games or watching anime.