writers-muses: 57.1.D. "I'm sorry that I'm not exactly what you bargained for."
[LOCKED]
Every now and then I get plagued with these...annoying bouts of inadequacy. I doubt absolutely everything around me, and it is unfair to those in my life because I am well aware that those feelings should not be given a second thought.
Yet...
Well, it happens. No one gives me a reason to think them. No one even hints at it at all - on the contrary, everything they do shows that obviously they do care about me, and want me in their lives.
Yet...
It comes with every full moon. It comes even more so on the mornings after, when I am too worn out to do much. With each transformation that passes my body is getting more and more tired of them, and all I keep thinking is that no one should have to deal with having to take care of me. It is a burden that no one needs. It is completely unfair for them to have to pause their lives for me, and... I don't know. I hate that it happens. I hate that they have to deal with it, and be burdened by it. By me. I can already hear everyone adamantly saying that I am not a burden, but I cannot help but think of it that way.
I am grateful that they do not think the same way that I do. There is just this...annoying little voice inside me, this never-ending insecurity that comes on those full moons, that wonders how long it will be until they do.
Every now and then I get plagued with these...annoying bouts of inadequacy. I doubt absolutely everything around me, and it is unfair to those in my life because I am well aware that those feelings should not be given a second thought.
Yet...
Well, it happens. No one gives me a reason to think them. No one even hints at it at all - on the contrary, everything they do shows that obviously they do care about me, and want me in their lives.
Yet...
It comes with every full moon. It comes even more so on the mornings after, when I am too worn out to do much. With each transformation that passes my body is getting more and more tired of them, and all I keep thinking is that no one should have to deal with having to take care of me. It is a burden that no one needs. It is completely unfair for them to have to pause their lives for me, and... I don't know. I hate that it happens. I hate that they have to deal with it, and be burdened by it. By me. I can already hear everyone adamantly saying that I am not a burden, but I cannot help but think of it that way.
I am grateful that they do not think the same way that I do. There is just this...annoying little voice inside me, this never-ending insecurity that comes on those full moons, that wonders how long it will be until they do.