Worst Apology in History - for gay jokes
http://outsports.com/jocktalkblog/2012/06/03/jason-alexander-offers-the-greatest-apology-in-history-for-gay-cricket-jokes/
A good friend of mine posted that link, with the comment, "Touching! What an incredible, heart-felt, and reflective apology. Most would have blown it off...BUT he really thought about it, discussed it and analyzed it...Nice going, Jason!"
I heartily disagree! I know an apology when I read one, and this is NOT an apology, just excuses. And definitely analyze his last paragraph !
I'd like it verified that he even wrote that himself, by himself, and didn't have someone compose it for him. And I have doubts that he really feels remorse, more than it's a case of trying to get out of trouble with the public, and with Hollywood. This is why: He touts out his musical theatre/dance background and claims he was jeered at and "with violence or the threat of violence." He is also a short man, portly, and quite balding. None of those three are thought of well for men in our society, although there is no Pride Month for short, bald guys. But still I wonder, what's wrong with this guy's CHARACTER? You claim you were picked on for A,B and C, and yet you bash people in the very same way as soon as you get to the top, as an adult, a rich, famous adult, with all the power that comes with that. Adversity is supposed to Build Character. Usually someone who was bullied does not become a bully, but either stays shy/frightened/mousy, or becomes an advocate against bullying. They don't become someone who Bullies others. Not unless there's something wrong with their CHARACTER - deep down.
I was severely bullied and ostracized every day of my childhood until I got to high school and made my first friend. Now that I am finally an adult, and get to choose my friends, my job, and where i hang out, do I go around making fun of other people? Heck no! (Not unless they just slipped on the ice, haha.) No! I go out of my way to SEEK OUT in any group, any person likely to receive derision, or be left out of things, and I taught my kids to act like this, too. My kids go out of their way to approach "the new kid" in their class and ask him over to play. They (and I) pointedly make it a priority to offer welcome and friendship to someone with a disability, to the fat person, to the not very pretty girl, to the scrawny guy. What's the payback for my kids? (Not that they do it for the payback, but it's a reward anyway.) These people on the fringe of acceptance usually always have better CHARACTER than the exalted football quarterback - the god of the school.
Power corrupts. Think of the movies about Mean Girls. And adversity is supposed to breed Character. So if this Jason is trying to use his theater background to soften up people's reaction to his cruel humor, then I don't buy it. If that's his purpose, then I say HE DIDN'T GET BULLIED ENOUGH. Not enough to breed Character.
I also call bullpuckey on his excuse that comedy always makes fun of someone. And he said "always". He said, "I do know that humor always points to the peccadillos or absurdities or glaring generalities of some kind of group or another - short, fat, bald, blonde, ethnic, smart, dumb, rich, poor, etc. It is hard to tell any kind of joke that couldn’t be seen as offensive to someone. " That's crap, and HE KNOWS IT ! He's trying to get out of trouble by intentionally lying. Here's why I say so. He's the same age as we are. And in Hollywood. Is he trying to imply he's never ever heard or watched the comedy of the great BILL COSBY? In Cosby's spiel on going to the dentist - who did he ostracize, what group of people did he make fun of or bully? Not even the Dentist, really. He never gave the impression that dentistry was anything other than honorable. No, Cosby finds a situation that is common to every human, rich/poor, tall/short, bald men/bearded women, black/white, fat/skinny, and every flavor of sexuality including love of chickens. And Cosby pulls out what's UNIVERSALLY funny about the SITUATION, not what's funny AGAINST PEOPLE.
And Jason grew up in this same era, same America, as I did. It's impossible that he got to a whopping 50 years old-ish without ever hearing Cosby, or others like him.
It's impossible that Jason has never seen someone slip on the ice, or trip. It's impossible that he's never seen anyone walking around with TP trailing from his/her shoe, or had food spilled on their shirt/tie. So I call Bullpuckey on his assertion that comedy ALWAYS pokes fun at people in fringe groups - or groups at all. There is plenty of funny things about common life ! And he knows it.
And he's also trying to snow you with that "Ignorance Card" over claiming that he just didn't get it. Ignorance simply means "without knowledge". It's built into the word - without Gnosis. It's a word that's grossly misused today instead of "sinful, rude, prejudiced, biggotted." Call a spade a spade. And Jason claims "I am profoundly aware of the challenges these friends of mine face", and that he was bullied for a hobby other than football quarterback himself. Back in our day, he was probably called a faggot, or fag. How then, do you expect me to believe he was "without knowledge"? And short, pudgy, and bald as a man, to boot? Even the character he played for years on TV was made fun of, or was suffering from feeling unworthy, unacceptable - both by men and women (for a boyfriend) because of these physical attributes. And yet he wants a free pass excuse of "without knowledge"? He's just trying to pass the blame to, "I just didn't get it." Horseshit. Own up to it !
Reread his letter. Almost all of it is his EXCUSES, that he is INNOCENT because of Ignorance, and only at the very end does he really attempt to actually APOLOGIZE. Actually, he doesn't really ever say he was WRONG, or sinful, or hurtful. No, he claims his comedy bit was "well-intentioned". That's starkly IMPOSSIBLE. He KNEW that this routine was not just against the odd-looking uniforms of cricket players, nor the goofy looking approach a player makes when throwing the ball. He PURPOSEFULLY, and with FORETHOUGHT, CHOSE to do this practiced routine on TV, knowing that he was lumping in the goofiness of cricket with what type of sexual relations one chooses to engage in. And I say, "purposefully and with forethought", because I didn't miss the part where he said that he did this routine years ago, and it's starkly implied that he did it several times in his words "I was hosting comics in a touring show in Australia". A touring show is multiple appearances, hence he bashed gays by equating their sexual preferences with cricket behavior multiple times. He also said "years ago", so he's had years to think that over, years to grow up and mature. Ignorant - meaning innocently without knowledge? Bullcrap !
Let's look at his summation, his last paragraph, where he finally uses the word "apologize". Almost the entire paragraph is still him protesting he is innocent of blame or has an excuse, and worse !
"So, I can only apologize and I do. In comedy, timing is everything. And when a group of people are still fighting so hard for understanding, acceptance, dignity and essential rights - the time for some kinds of laughs has not yet come. I hope my realization brings some comfort."
No, Jason. Timing of a joke, as in "don't rush its delivery" is NOT the same as deciding when is the appropriate TIME TO BASH gay people ! He flat out says that "the time for some kinds of laughs has not yet come". Which kinds of laughs is he referring to? Laughs against Gay people, since that's the context here !! He didn't say the time to Gaybash was OVER. Nor did he say that there never was an appropriate time to commit that sin. No, he leaves open the idea that there is still coming an appropriate time to bash gay people.
That is no apology, and I don't accept it !!!
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Lastly, don't write off what I have said above because of your preconceived notions about homosexuality, or where you think I stand on the issue. Don't think I got all that angry because I'm gay. Because I'm not. I can't even be qualified as a gay advocate. And I wish all people would just keep what they do with their private parts in their private time - PRIVATE. Same rule for heterosexuals. That's why bedrooms have doors. I think it's bad manners to discuss all such things at the table at a public restaurant.
That being said, whole rant is not even about homosexuality at all ! Jason Alexander committed three sins.
1. He bashed a group of people who happen to like sexual relations in a way different from him. That part was anti-gay.
2. He sinned against ALL people by making fun of ANY GROUP of people who are different. This is the same sin as if he had picked black people, or Christians, or Wiccans, or Iraqis, or Jews, or mentally handicapped people. Targeting your "comedy" AT a group of people is divisive, and SINFUL. Pointing out that you think the tradition uniform for cricket players looks silly is NOT.
3. And his third sin was his non-apology - that he is lying that he is sorry. It was just a planned out writing, not off the cuff remark - full of excuses as to why he shouldn't be blamed as a gay-basher. And he still maintains that making fun of groups of people is perfectly fine.
Dear Jason, you said "the time for some kinds of laughs has not yet come." Dude, the time for bashing groups of humans never was !