andrew...i want to say something to you, but i just can't pinpoint what exactly...i both agree with you and disagree with you in Section I. I feel that sometimes you let it get to you too much. You had every right to ask him not to use the word (i know i have used it before, and you have asked me to not use it...i respect that), but sometimes it feels like you are asking people to stop for sake of making them stop and not because it truly offends you...i know it does offend you, but you have a reputation for telling people not to use that word and i am afraid that people are starting to rub that in just because they know it bothers you. so for your own protection, i would try to find the happy medium of telling people to stop only when it is necessarily appropriate. oh...and please dont take this the wrong way, i support you 100% and i respect you like 4,567,342% and i think you are right in doing what you do, for your own sake, i think you may need to let it go by a few times...maybe try the dissapproving look a few times...that
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I let it go about 85% of the time already. However, when someone uses it directly to me, I'm not going to let it go. If someone calls me it or says it stright up to me, I'm going to say something. I do the same thing when someone says that something is [again, word omitted. This one three letters and starting with G. again, not an inherently bad word but also used offensively when as an insult] directly to me. Even when people say those things in a group, even a small one of only three or four people, I often let it go because I just don't feel like getting in a debate whether it's okay or not (for future reference, it's not. It really does degrade anyone who is disabled and I take quite personal offense to that). But when someone says it straight to me or actually calls me it, I'm going to say something.
I know how it is dude. My sister is a behaviorist, and works with developmentally disabled children every single day. She yells at my brothers and I everytime we say the word. I never mean to say it, but it just slips. I'm going to work with her this summer and run playgroups for her, so maybe that will finally put the seal on it.
And another thing I wanted to add was that it was actually an adjective before having a application to something. But i dont think anyone thinks about that definition when saying it.
I don't know how you mean that it was an adjective... but I do know that it originally meant to be slowed. I've seen it used in literature as that. And that's awesome about your sister and your plan for the summer! It's so fun working with these kids! I worked in my brother's class last summer and it was so fun!
Your correcting me about saying the R word has really stopped me from saying it all-together. I'm more aware of when i involuntarily want to use it and I can stop myself from verbally speakng it. Little by little I've noticed that I stop thinking about it all together. I say keep confronting - if it's stopped me, it's bound to stop someone else. I've gotta say that I totally admire you for confronting people about using it. Although I'm totally on your side, I can't get the guts to tell my friends not to use it. I just tend to ignore it and forget it. So, I say keep doing what you're doing!
don't feel like you should or have to. I don't expect that many people would. A lot of the people I tell don't even do it themselves, so I hardly ever see anyone spreading the word... it's kinda a hard one to explain since most people think of it as just a word and refuse to have their ideas changed...
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And another thing I wanted to add was that it was actually an adjective before having a application to something. But i dont think anyone thinks about that definition when saying it.
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