is misery made beautiful right before our eyes

[aunomdedieu]

Characters: aunomdedieu and OPEN.
Date: Backdated to midday, May 26th.
Summary: Caprica returns to the Gardens.
Warnings: Angst and emotional confusion? Spoilers for BSG season three, I guess. Shouldn't be anything else, but I'll warn if it comes up.

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[aunomdedieu]

I've come to believe that it wasn't a good idea to make us so similar.

That statement catches Caprica a little, because it's something she has wondered about herself in the past. Wondered if it was a good idea for the Cylons to recreate themselves in a form so very similar to humanity, with everything attendant on that - emotions, desires, failings. Would it be easier for her if she couldn't feel sadness, anger, love, happiness?

And then she always dismisses that question, because Caprica has never done the easier thing and because it is essentially a ridiculous question. The pain and the joy alike are a gift from God. She isn't like Cavil, who despises every flaw and weakness of his humanoid form. Those things are part of life, living, being alive, and that's something she clings to despite everything. She is alive, no matter how much the humans would like to believe she and her siblings are just machines.

Having her own question turned around on her is... something she expected, but it's still not any easier, and an unsteadiness flickers through her expression before she controls it carefully, drawing in a breath. This is something she only really feels safe discussing with Epsilon because she isn't human - it was something she wanted to discuss with her before, but most of the previous times they've talked have been over the Vine, and she doesn't want to bring it up in a forum so public.

"More than fifty years ago," she begins, quietly, "mankind created robots called Cylons. They were designed as soldiers, laborers - designed to make life easier for humanity." Caprica is very cautious and careful not to use the word slaves, though she would like to, and Epsilon may hear the implication in the flatness of her tone. It's a little like she's simply reciting from a history book, as if she doesn't have a personal stake at all in what she's discussing.

"And then the day came when the Cylons became aware of themselves, and decided that they didn't want to serve humanity any longer. So they rebelled. There was a war that lasted for twelve years, then an armistice. The Cylons left the Twelve Colonies and disappeared into space for more than four decades."

She draws a breath, then continues. "During that time, the Cylons evolved into a new form that mimicked the human body so accurately as to be almost indistinguishable." A beat, then she adds, with a slight smile, "I am a product of that evolution."

There is a good bit more to the story, but she's going to pause a moment to let Epsilon digest all of that.

[lovelikelight]

Epsilon takes the information in with less surprise than a human might. Her emotions are different than a human's, and more controlled. At last, she nods.

"In my world, robots were also made to serve humans, originally. The situation has been changing, as laws have been made to protect us, but we are not yet equal. I can understand how those circumstances could easily cause a war. It's a volatile imbalance of power, an unsustainable situation." There is a sadness in her eyes as she says this. "It is unjust." To make machines that can think and feel, then use them as if they were simply objects--it isn't right.

"There is not precisely a war in my world, not now, but there has been a great deal of violence." Caused in no small part by the earlier war.

"I hadn't realized you weren't human. You must be very close in design. Usually, I would be able to tell. I'm very different from a human, in some ways." She doesn't blame Caprica for not telling her the truth, if it was something she found difficult to speak of. "I'm glad you told me."