fifth bullet :: video

[headedforhope]

[It's been awhile since this girl showed her face on the Vine in a way that wasn't in a more private conversation with friends. Ever since her breakdown during the last incident, Mami's been scarce; she's had to do a lot of thinking, had to face a lot of painful truths, sorting things out in her head until she could come together again. It was the

Comments

[notvitiligo]

...how would you suggest making it not a prison?

[headedforhope]

Find ways to be happy, reasons to hang onto hope. I can't give you step by step instructions- something like this....you have to figure it out for yourself, like I did. But if there's something you enjoy about this place....indulge in it. Things like that.

I think that this place is, in many ways, what we make of it. True, we are all confined, there's no getting around it. But....for some of us, that's for the best. So the best of it we' have to make. I don't want to spend the rest of my existence here as a miserable person if I can help it.

[notvitiligo]

It'd probably be easier if this place wasn't designed to take away all the stuff I actually like.

I'd probably go totally nuts if it weren't for some of the people here, and even then... I feel kind of bad, since I know they'd mostly be better off at home.

[headedforhope]

I never said it'd be easy. The Queen's idea of a paradise is noticeably flawed.

Mmhm, I can understand that. But...it's not wrong to feel that way, to enjoy their company, even though it came about from mutual abduction. I used to feel guilty about doing the same thing.

[alchemistsquery]

This place is a second chance for me. I am grateful.

...I don't think I've seen you before. I'm Alfimi.

[headedforhope]

Is it? Then I'm glad, and I mean that.

Ah, you haven't. I'm Mami...Mami Tomoe. It's nice to meet you.

[alchemistsquery]

Thank you! You are very kind!

It's nice to meet you, too, Mami! I'm excited by this surprise. I think it will definitely be a good thing. If the Queen knows she was bad and really wants to say she's sorry, then everything will be okay!

[headedforhope]

[She looks surprised at first, then on the verge of protesting, but after a moment she just nods.] Thank you for the compliment, Miss Alfimi.

You think so?...that's a very optimistic way of looking at it. I hope it'll be a good thing, too- I guess I just have my doubts, knowing her.

[sexy_beams]

Dolls she can bump together? So, she's a big kid that want to play romance but lost all her Ken dolls.

[headedforhope]

Unfortunately, I think that's a pretty accurate assessment. Like a child....not malicious, but still a child.

[says the fourteen year old]

[sexy_beams]

Ha. Kids can be plenty malicious. But let me guess: you don't know where she is, either?

[headedforhope]

Yes, hence the clarification. [badum tsh] And no, I don't- her location's a secret to all of us, pretty much, for obvious reasons.

[video]

[tookupthesword]

I think something's being built, I keep hearing sounds of it, but it's small.

Any guesses?

[video]

[headedforhope]

You think so? Hmm.....well, do you remember that extravagant ball we went to a few months ago? Maybe it's something like that- a new area we're supposed to "enjoy".

[video]

[tookupthesword]

Of course I remember... has it been that long? Hope I don't have to dress up again.

... Also, didn't that give us those damn robots?

[video]

[headedforhope]

It doesn't feel like that much time has passed, huh?...for me, it feels even longer.

Heh, it did. And we might get such an unexpected addition this time around- the Queen doesn't really think things through, as we've learned.

[ebony_bone]

You truly believe a prison is worse than being treated like dolls?

[headedforhope]

Sorry, is that how I made it sound? [she looks thoughtful] No, both are bad- but just because that's how she thinks of us, it's not what we have to be. Her whims, and false perceptions, can't erase who we are. And just because we're confined here doesn't mean this has to be a place of suffering.

I know not everyone is like me, so I don't expect unanimous agreement. Others have probably left so much more behind than I have. Even if I did manage to leave....well, I have nothing to go back to, let's just say. So if this is to be my home, I have to think of it differently.

[ebony_bone]

[Her manner softens a little at Mami's response. She's incredibly angry at the Queen at the moment, but she does understand Mami's position, doesn't need to direct her anger at her.]

Perhaps if there was some way to fight against her manipulations, but we seem helpless to her whims, at the moment.

I understand some are safer and happier here, but I wonder how safe we truly are. She is mad and powerful. The two together are not a good combination.

[headedforhope]

[She tries for an understanding smile- it's a little shaky, but it's there. Mami's been hurt by the Queen's thoughtless plans, and wasn't one to forgive early even before her arrival here; anger is a feeling she can empathize with.]

I've been here for a few months and all I've been able to do is resist what she tosses at us- not outright stop it. Even then, I can't rebuff her all the time; the way she can affect us all is so varied that there's no perfect defense against it.

Yes, you're right. She's not so much a proper ruler as she is a child- whatever good intentions she has are obscured by her own impulses and egotism. I may want to live here peacefully, and I'm glad for the opportunity....but I know that's a naive desire, and there are things I can't forgive her for. [a pause, and the next words come a little painfully:] She brings us here based on an assumption and wonders why we're not all happy. She hurts us, and expects absolution after a simple apology. I've spoken to her multiple times and I doubt that she'll ever change.