I have lost control of my life
Me: I kind of want even-younger-than-tween wolf
Where they’re like 5-6 and Derek is like 12
just. rolly polly Scott all cuddled up to Derek like a puppy
Stiles chewing on his jacket
Tombolguid: playing in the woods, tumbling all over each other, big piles of giggling kids and Derek likes to snuffle at Stiles' faces and lick him bc it makes Stiles giggle and kick his legs
Me: ugh ugh whyyyy
Tombolguid: and it’s the high pitch kid giggles too
Me: noooooo
Tombolguid: those almost baby squeals
Me: stahp
Me: ugh and Derek, like, plays fetch with them (where they throw their shoes and he goes and gets them and stuffs them back on their chubby little feet because what if catch COLD)
Tombolguid: and he lets them use him as a pillow when they watch cartoons
Me: yes ugh and Lydia throws the worst tantrums until Derek gives her a piggy back ride
Tombolguid: but he can get all sulky sometimes bc he’s not an ACTUAL dog. they should like him as a kid too
Me: but they do! they totally do and even when he gets sulky they just dog pile all over him until he perks up
Tombolguid: exactly!
Me: jump-on-Derek is one of their favoritest games
Tombolguid: always
Me: hide and seek too (they make Derek hold his nose because cheating)
Tombolguid: LOL
Me: and he always plays along anyway like, six inches away from them going "wheeeeeere's Stiles? where could he BE"
while they giggle and tell him he's getting colder
Tombolguid: best babysitter ever
Me: BEST BEST OMFG
Me: okay I just had a thought--what if toddler!Stiles
Tombolguid: omg
no
Me: who still knows stuff but he's pre-verbal
Tombolguid: I’m dead
Me: like, he thinks he's talking but it's just a stream of babble as he pats Derek’s face
BAH BAH BAH BRUGGLE BAHGRUUWEEEE
Tombolguid: shut up
I cant
snot bubble
Me: and keeps looking at Derek with his big brown eyes like "why are you so dumb today"
omfgggg snot bubble
Tombolguid: dude, toddlers, psychologically, think they share a consciousness with the world. they think that what they’re thinking is what everyone else is
Me: yes yes yes yes exactly
so no different than Stiles on a normal day
Tombolguid: lol basically
Me: toddler!Stiles probably knows what spell he got whammied with and knows it wears off in a day and, like, sees no reason why Scott and the others are fussing so much
he TOLD them he's fine ("gurglebUGOOO")
Tombolguid: the tantrum he throws when he’s tired
Me: omggg so precious, so LOUD
all the grabby hands to pick him up
Tombolguid: like "I have been explaining this shit for hours and you won’t listen and I’m hungry and what are you feeding me you all suck" and it’s all wailing and throwing things and shoving his face into couch cushions
Me: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Tombolguid: until someone picks him and rubs his back and he hiccups
Me: omfg
Tombolguid: and sniffles
that warm baby back
and his hair is all messy and his cheeks are red and they have to clean his face
Me: can Scott pick him up bc I feel like this is so best friends duty and Scott would be awesome at it
Tombolguid: yes he can
Scott goes to pick him up and he’s totally not sure what to do but picking him up seems like the thing so he grabs Stiles and puts him on his hip and they both stare at each other for a second like >.> <.<
and then Stiles plants his face on Scott’s neck and gives up
Me: ajsklfjaksdljf
what if Derek kind of wanders by while Scott is holding him and sniffs and like "dude you need to change his diaper"
Scott suddenly going NOPE TOO FAR OUTSIDE BEST FRIENDS DUTY N O P E
Derek can totally tell when Stiles is hungry because his tummy gurgles and Derek hears it
Tombolguid: and also Stiles starts to suck on his mouth and he gets cranky
Me: and Derek is like "I AM ALPHA I WILL PROVIDE FOR THE PACK" goes to grocery store for toddler food
Tombolguid: conveniently saves him from diaper duty
Me: he’s a wascally werewolf
Tombolguid: what if Scott is sitting on the floor with Stiles and he falls asleep and Derek is lying on the couch bc alpha and Stiles isn’t asleep yet and Scott is no fun anymore so he starts staring at Derek and he stands up and makes grabby hands and Derek is like O.O no but Stiles is like nnnnnnnnng and Derek picks him up and Stiles just settles on him
Me: Stiles climbs his leather coat to look him in the face
he burbles and pokes Derek’s nose
"Abubuh" *GIGGLE*
Tombolguid: and full open hand slap
Me: pfffft kajdfladsjf
Tombolguid: soft, baby slap of curiosity
Me: klsfjlakdf
what if when Scott wakes up
Derek is playing peekaboo
WITH HIS WOLF FACE
Tombolguid: OMG
Me: like "wheeeere's the wolfie? THERE HE IS"
while Stiles shrieks with laughter
Tombolguid: I would die
I want this so bad I can't even talk about it (BUT I WILL TRY FOR YOU, BBS). I want this as an ENTIRE SEASON ARC.