welcome to the shortest recorded hiatus in LJ history
The good news is! I HAVE EENTERNET. \OOOO/ This would normally make up for everything that is bad news, but ugh, bbs, today was just. Long. And. ...Long.
I don't know what is is about this conference that seems to draw out the entitled and high-maintenance older women, but I've been forced into prolonged conversation with two of them now, at two different instances, about the same shit, and I think it would do the world a kindness if they were both locked in a cellar together somewhere and left for, say, a week.
*claw hands*
Yes, you are both, by your own definition, "old." You said it, not me. Though I think it's a fucking shame that my mother, who is older than both of you, must be by your definition decrepit to the point of death. Yes, the Conference should have been clearer that you would be sharing accomodations. BUT IT IS FREE. FREE ROOM. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO STAY HERE. IT IS FIRST COME FIRST SERVE, I WAS HERE FIRST, AND YOUR PASSIVE-AGRESSIVE-WITH-EMPHASIS-ON-THE-AGRESSIVE HINTS THAT I SHOULD GIVE UP AN ACTUAL MATTRESS FOR YOU, WHO ARE PERFECTLY HALE AND HEALTHY AND FINANCIALLY STABLE ENOUGH TO DRAG YOUR SORRY CARCASS TO A HOTEL, JUST.
rrrrrrrrgh. My mom is sleeping behind a couch, because she thinks it's an adventure and she's perfectly happy to do it (and she's slept in much worse places and so have I). If anyone is switching (and we probably most definitely are, as soon as I can talk her into it) I will be switching with her, you absolute whiners. Back off.
The first woman, when the poor boy (who had to deal with this clusterfuck presented by the higher ups with no training or warning or prep of any kind) asked her how to spell her last name, she said, and I quote, "People who ask me that must never read newspapers."
And the other one, the one I'm actually sharing a dorm suite with? Two minutes is not long enough to know someone before you tell them your daughter is planning on losing her virginity in South America. It is definitely not long enough to ask this person if they lost their virginity in Scotland, fucking just. Fuck off. You over share, lady. Just because we will hopefully never see each other again after this week does not mean you can suddenly remove your verbal filter.
Also, when I pointed out to her that the rooms were free, she got very pissy and said, "They are not. I am paying for them with my acting."
Which...for the Conference this year...actually cost the actors $50 each. Really, you're getting a huge discount for attending the Conference (normally over two hundred dollars) which provides a) free room, b) free lunches, c) free panels, d) two free fancy dinners and e) a free glacial cruise. You do not get to tell me you snore, and expect that to be incentive enough for me to give up my bed, I brought earplugs, I do not care.
Shit, sorry, had to get that out, ummmmm GOOD THINGS. There were lots of good things. Cabin Pressure, oh my god, flightjacket , thank you. We now make obscure references to things only the three of us will understand, and Benny is ADORABLE, I luff him, and keep picturing Sherlock when he snuck into the Museum in The Great Game wearing the night watchman's uniform. *___* Also the Fringe Fest plays--CockTalk in particular, alksdjfladjk--were lolariously good, I will forever think of Orlando Bloom's cock as being "pale and minty fresh," don't ask me to explain it, I don't think I can.
And, you know, INTERNET, which is lovely. *rolls around in it* But I think I should probably actually read my plays before going to bed, Psycho Bitch #2 looked vaguely horrified when I mentioned I'd only skimmed them.
Then again...I could just fall asleep watching White Collar and reading porn. Hmmm.