Je serai dans ma bunk.
Right. So. girlnamedpixley asked me this question and I DO NOT KNOW THE ANSWER, GUYS, C'EST UN FREAKING TRAVESTI. It's a transvestite? Shut up, klu.
Why is there NO FIC that takes advantage of the fact that Steve obviously has mad language skillz? I mean we know he speaks Hawaiian and Mandarin. And given his time in the 'Stan, I firmly believe (based on nothing more than my vivid imagination and his freaky need to excel at EVERYTHING) that he's mastered at least two dialects of Farsi. And just for the hell of it, let's throw Korean in there, too.
So...with all that, where are the stories??? Where is the story where it's 9 in the morning and Danny didn't even get to finish his coffee before they were doing 80 mph across the island toward the scene of a multiple shooting in a vacation resort only to find that the only eye-witness is a tiny little old lady from France who doesn't speak English no matter how loudly Danny gestures at her, and the harder he gestures and the more confused she gets, the more the vein in Danny's forehead is threatening to explode until finally Steve comes back from talking to the hotel manager and calmly puts a hand on Danny's back and gently interrupts with a very smooth, "Je sais que c'est dur, mais j'ai besoin de vous pour essayer de se souvenir. Avez-vous réellement voir une arme à feu la première fois qu'il passait devant vous?"
And then Danny has to just kind of stop and stare and think, "of course the bastard knows French, because he just wasn't quite hot enough 15 minutes ago when he was only 99.99% perfect. Now he has to speak FRENCH! And then Danny probably doesn't get any work done ever again because every time Steve looks at him after that, all he can think about is how it would sound if Steve murmured soft French words against his neck late at night while they're breathless and pressed hard against each other, wrapped up in nothing more than cool sheets and warm skin and a whole night full of hours to spend however they want.
So. If there are fics. If you felt so inclined to write a fic. IF YOU JUST WANT TO KEYMASH ABOUT IT.
Answer her question? :D