dreaming is believing
➤ gasp two posts in a row. i guess this should mean that my no, my lj is not dead. it just was on a coma but now i'm (hopefully) back to posting about things going on in my mundane life.
➤ tonight i went out with friends for dinner and karaoke. it was much fun, i missed everybody but the pressure to actually go do something with my life is back on. i'm the type who works when it's time for work, but when it's time for play i will sure as hell play. but yes, now playtime is over and i need to get my shit together lol. also watched the avengers for the second time! idk i never seem to tire of it. it is amazing, if i weren't already married, i would marry it dkjasbldas
➤
i mentioned in my previous post that i wanted to do a writing meme. it was actually brought on by late night thoughts regarding my style of writing. so here, because i like answering questions.
How about a brief introduction of yourself?
i go by the name laura. writing was something that came naturally to me, and i started concocting absurd situations back when i was still a child. i drew and wrote a picture book when i was seven, and to my embarrassment, my mother kept it and treats it as something to be proud of. i guess back then, making up stories was something that i found interesting. i started writing fiction properly in elementary, when a friend of mine actually asked me if i wanted to co-write fanfiction with her. the idea interested me and from then on, writing became an integral part of me.
And what got you into fanfiction to begin with?
as previously mentioned, this certain friend of mine. before she did drag me into the entire fanfiction business, she wrote and posted online versions of her fiction too. these involved anime characters and original characters (named after me and my other friends) in romantic situations. prior to this, i had no clear idea what fanfiction was. it was like a magical land of rainbows and unicorns for me, but my friend made this world tangible for me. it's weird but i never realized before this meme just how important her role is in my writing.
What kind of fanfiction do you like to write?
i love writing about everyday situations and exploring the different aspects of it. i'm not really the type to make up fantasy worlds and make-believe situations. rather, i like to work on something that's already there and expanding the idea. when it comes to genres, recently, i have been addicted to drama. there is always some sort of drama going on in everything i write. i love writing angst too. somehow, it's these genres that just flips my switch on. they are the easiest to write for me.
Do you tend to write the same pairings/characters? Or are you a fandom whore?
i am easily swayed by other people's opinions, i admit. but i think that just gives me more insight to other pairings and characters. i am willing to try anything at least once, so i have written about pretty bizarre pairings. but no matter what, there are pairings and characters i will always go back to. they are my comfort zone. i feel like i know these pairings best, and there is always an aspect of the character or the pair that i would want to explore more.
What is your most popular fanfic and why do you think people like it so?
wow, i am not really sure since i'm not aware which one people actually say their favorite is. but judging from feedback i guess it would be this one? i'm not entirely sure why people like it so much. it's not anything new, and i don't think i brought anything new to the table. but i guess within the fandom, the idea is novel? this is just a guess though lol.
Forget other people...what is the fanfic you've written that you're most proud of?
i'm proud of perfect because it is seriously the first multi-chaptered fiction that i finished (lol my attention span is pathetic). but what i'm really, truly proud of is this one. for one, the pairing is something that i never knew i liked until i actually wrote about them. for another, people who know me should know that yamapi is not my favorite person. in fact, i couldn't give a fuck about him if i tried. and yet, surprisingly, people praised me for my version of him. they claimed that it was "believable" and being able to capture the character of someone i am so close to hating is something i am proud of. there is also the fact that this fiction was super easy to write. the words just so easily came to me and before i realized it, it was too long to be one chapter. haha. this is definitely one of my favorite works of mine.
Do you find writing easy? Hard? What are the most difficult aspects of writing?
ah this question. admittedly, when i am in condition, writing is easy. i used to churn out fiction within an hour, that was how easy writing was for me. but i work from the extremes, so when i hit a slump, i hit it hard. as of right now, i am finding it so hard to write. i do get momentum at times, but when that's broken i find it hard to get back into it. i think the most difficult aspect of writing is properly conveying the scene in the author's mind to the reader. what the author writes and what the reader reads aren't always the same, and i think that being able to achieve that is a feat. when i write, i tend to focus more on emotions and feelings, the intangible. i try to find words so the reader can understand what the character is going through and somehow empathize with them, and i hope each time that that gets across when people read my work.
Write a few sentences or so of your favorite pairing or character.
it's so hard choosing a favorite character. i thought mine was akanishi jin to be honest. to a point, i thought i understood him; i thought i knew him. but it turns out i didn't, and it suddenly feels like the jin i was so fond of writing of wasn't really jin at all. but if i really had to choose, it would be nino. i can always picture nino in a scene. he can always fit. he's the sort of guy who falls into certain character categories, but every now and then, he would do things to surprise you. and i find myself loving about guessing his next move. would he do this? would he do that? he's interesting.
another character i love writing about is yamanaka ino (bet you didn't expect that huh). biases aside, there are so many dimensions to ino that even i'm not sure of. some of them are guesses of mine, and i can't be entirely sure that they're true. another thing about ino is that i feel like i understand her. it's absurd because we share no similar experiences, but it feels like i've been through all of them with her. i can sympathize with her completely that it's so easy to write about her.
Are there any fanfiction trends/cliches that you're sick of?
a lot actually. there are several character cliches that annoy me: aiba being stupid, massu being addicted to food, jin being an airhead--i haven't read fiction in a while, but these i remember i hate the most. they are not one-dimensional characters, they are people who feel and do other things. i'm also sick of original characters who somehow end up with an idol because of one thing or another. some people can pull it off, some just cannot. lastly, mpreg fics scare the shit of me. i do not want to understand how the hell they happen, nor do i want to understand. i don't get why people find this interesting.
since i am currently in my shikamaru/ino phase, i have been reading several fanfiction on them. my biggest annoyance is when people use ino's beauty as an excuse for shikamaru to fall for her. i'm sure that if shikamaru fell for ino's beauty, he wouldn't treat her with such an indifference during the first part of the series. shikamaru isn't that shallow--he isn't going to love somebody because they sported a pretty face and a hot body. there is also the point that ino is more than just pretty. she's annoying, demanding and spoiled. she's tough, independent and manipulative. there are so many different aspects of her, go write about that please.
Are you guilty of any of these? Or have you committed other crimes?
of course there came a time when all my characters felt flat. when i read my earlier fics, it feels like torture sometimes because unless the character isn't the one in the spotlight, i don't bother exploring their other traits.
and yes, guys, i have written arashi fiction wherein i ~*~magically~*~ become aquainted with arashi and we have lots of fun times. this was during the time when the idea of RPS scared me so badly that i couldn't bring myself to write about it (oh how times have changed). i have written several chapters and did several versions. it makes me cringe everytime lol. i think the important point in here is realizing what makes this trend or cliche annoying. if you agree with the reason, then stop doing it. if you don't, do it. it's just that. i hold this ideal that an author is writing because they have something they want to say. they should always uphold whatever they publish. they should be their own biggest fan. they should believe in what they write.
What was the first fandom you wrote for? Do you continue to like/participate in it?
first fandom i wrote for was cardcaptor sakura. i don't remember why it was this fandom, but given that this was an influential part of my life (no seriously) i don't mind at all. i kind of stopped writing for it when the series ended and there was nothing left to read or watch, but my interest returned when tsubasa reservoir chronicles came out. the interest was short lived, but i managed to write another story for the fandom before i completely stopped participating in the fandom. the thing is, even though i don't participate in it anymore, i still like it. it's an amazing fandom, because the characters are so much fun to throw into various situations in. that, and thanks to the magical power of ~*~ALTERNATE UNIVERSES~*~ the possibilities are endless. i have always thought that cardcaptor sakura characters are really flexible. not to mention each of them have so much depth and character that they're fun to come back to.
Name your OTPs or most frequently written pairings/characters and explain what it is about them that you love to write.
oh no, OTP question. i shall try to keep it short. for those in the planet who were not aware, i have OTPs for every johnnys group i like lol. i didn't really mean for it to turn out that way, but something about these pairs attracted me so bad, and who was i to deny a ship? anyway, my two most favorite JE pairs:
01 SAKURAI SHO/MATSUMOTO JUN - i have this huge fetish for best friends. i really do. so sho and jun started out teeny weeny best friends. but then conflict shows up and bam, suddenly they hardly talk to each other to the point that it's unbelievable. i admit that the angsty what-ifs of what happened were what attracted me to this pair. i wanted so much to explain the reason for their drift, and how they can get over that. usually, that was how my fics went. but then they DID get over that distance, and now they've entered an entirely different category. what i love working on when it comes to this pair is that no matter what happens, they always hold a certain respect for each other. they are awkward and clumsy, and even shy but this doesn't change the fact that they acknowledge each other and they think highly of the other.
02 AKANISHI JIN/KAMENASHI KAZUYA - i am going down with this ship. save your meisa comments for some other akame fangirl, because nothing can faze me from this pair. again, if you would notice the best friends drifting apart pattern, it is also found in akame. but the thing that clearly differentiates akame from sakumoto is that first, the drift is so much more noticeable. second, they never made up. third, theirs is an angst that pulls your heart out and tramples it mercilessly on the ground. there is no happy ending for this pair, even i admit it. there will always be something to make you cry or sad. there will always be something to make you frustrated. but the best thing is, they have so much to work on. there is something really fishy about this pair because they have a lot of issues (with themselves, with each other). lots of theories and essays and whatnot were written in hopes of clearing things up, but there is no one answer. i have theories of my own, and i use those to form the beginnings of a fic. what i love the most about this pair, is that their friendship (or ex-friendship) was something precious. and i would like to believe that it was real (the one in their junior days, not the delusional friendship act they put on after their debut). and what i would really love, is for them to have some sort of closure. just that. i wouldn't even expect a hug or an apology. just closure.
when the news about jin got married, i contemplated hard on writing about a fic wherein jin and kame do achieve that closure. i had the entire thing mapped out in my head, with each part of the plot clearly outlined. but i couldn't write it. i couldn't bring myself to. because as much as i would love closure for them, it would mark the end of my ship. because i know that a closure would ensure that no further contact would be initiated. and i can't do that to myself. i don't want to do it to them. in me, there is still that tiny hope that they will someday talk this entire thing out.
and if you have thoughts otherwise, i don't really care about them.
runner up pairs: nishikido ryo/yamashita tomohisa (again, the bestfriends stereotype), nara shikamaru/yamanaka ino, akanishi jin/matsumoto jun
What would you call your writing "style"?
i have no idea. as i said, i'm more interested in how the character's mind works, so i focus on how they perceive the situation, and how they react to it. whatever that style is, that is mine.
Do you read other people's fanfics? If so, what do you find yourself reading the most?
yes. i read random fiction, depending on my whim. the thing is, i lose interest really easily so unless the fic is really good at engaging me, i will have no qualms in leaving it.
Name one thing you'd LOVE to write but haven't yet.
character death.
Do you have trouble taking criticism? Or worse yet, do you have a really bloated ego?
lol yes i do have trouble. like i said, the author should be their biggest fan, so it's hard to just accept someone claiming that something or something isn't good. initially, it hurts. but i get over it, and then i try to understand their side. i consider their suggestion, and i think about whether i want to keep it or not. in the end, i decide on the way i write, but criticism gives me another view. in spite of what people say, i will write for myself. i will never write something because it is what the people want. everything i write, i write because i like it.
When you write is there anything that helps? Music? Quiet room?
solitude, definitely. i need to be alone, or i prefer if i'm the only person awake in the room. i don't mind music, i don't mind the quiet. but i get conscious when other people are with me, especially if they're the type to look over your shoulder while you're writing. unless i'm totally into the story, in which case i can write anywhere.
What inspires you?
anything and everything. i don't have an exact place or person or thing to inspire me. i find that watching the world go by its pace gives me plenty of inspiration. i get inspired during a badmintion game, before an exam, while drinking juice--it just comes. i don't dictate it.
Lastly, how would you sum up your fanfiction experiences and yourself as a writer?
well i've definitely been writing for a long time, and i have changed drastically since i started out. i talked to kieok about it the other night, how i was so intent on pinning my writing style changes on an experience, and she started explaining to me that maybe it's just life doing this to me. and it is true. i'm just someone equipped with a voice and a mind, and i write things as i see them, or as how i want to see them.
i'm just me.
got carried away with that meme. i miss writing so much, i'm not even going to lie. i want to get out of this horrible slump already.
➤ tonight i went out with friends for dinner and karaoke. it was much fun, i missed everybody but the pressure to actually go do something with my life is back on. i'm the type who works when it's time for work, but when it's time for play i will sure as hell play. but yes, now playtime is over and i need to get my shit together lol. also watched the avengers for the second time! idk i never seem to tire of it. it is amazing, if i weren't already married, i would marry it dkjasbldas
➤
i mentioned in my previous post that i wanted to do a writing meme. it was actually brought on by late night thoughts regarding my style of writing. so here, because i like answering questions.
How about a brief introduction of yourself?
i go by the name laura. writing was something that came naturally to me, and i started concocting absurd situations back when i was still a child. i drew and wrote a picture book when i was seven, and to my embarrassment, my mother kept it and treats it as something to be proud of. i guess back then, making up stories was something that i found interesting. i started writing fiction properly in elementary, when a friend of mine actually asked me if i wanted to co-write fanfiction with her. the idea interested me and from then on, writing became an integral part of me.
And what got you into fanfiction to begin with?
as previously mentioned, this certain friend of mine. before she did drag me into the entire fanfiction business, she wrote and posted online versions of her fiction too. these involved anime characters and original characters (named after me and my other friends) in romantic situations. prior to this, i had no clear idea what fanfiction was. it was like a magical land of rainbows and unicorns for me, but my friend made this world tangible for me. it's weird but i never realized before this meme just how important her role is in my writing.
What kind of fanfiction do you like to write?
i love writing about everyday situations and exploring the different aspects of it. i'm not really the type to make up fantasy worlds and make-believe situations. rather, i like to work on something that's already there and expanding the idea. when it comes to genres, recently, i have been addicted to drama. there is always some sort of drama going on in everything i write. i love writing angst too. somehow, it's these genres that just flips my switch on. they are the easiest to write for me.
Do you tend to write the same pairings/characters? Or are you a fandom whore?
i am easily swayed by other people's opinions, i admit. but i think that just gives me more insight to other pairings and characters. i am willing to try anything at least once, so i have written about pretty bizarre pairings. but no matter what, there are pairings and characters i will always go back to. they are my comfort zone. i feel like i know these pairings best, and there is always an aspect of the character or the pair that i would want to explore more.
What is your most popular fanfic and why do you think people like it so?
wow, i am not really sure since i'm not aware which one people actually say their favorite is. but judging from feedback i guess it would be this one? i'm not entirely sure why people like it so much. it's not anything new, and i don't think i brought anything new to the table. but i guess within the fandom, the idea is novel? this is just a guess though lol.
Forget other people...what is the fanfic you've written that you're most proud of?
i'm proud of perfect because it is seriously the first multi-chaptered fiction that i finished (lol my attention span is pathetic). but what i'm really, truly proud of is this one. for one, the pairing is something that i never knew i liked until i actually wrote about them. for another, people who know me should know that yamapi is not my favorite person. in fact, i couldn't give a fuck about him if i tried. and yet, surprisingly, people praised me for my version of him. they claimed that it was "believable" and being able to capture the character of someone i am so close to hating is something i am proud of. there is also the fact that this fiction was super easy to write. the words just so easily came to me and before i realized it, it was too long to be one chapter. haha. this is definitely one of my favorite works of mine.
Do you find writing easy? Hard? What are the most difficult aspects of writing?
ah this question. admittedly, when i am in condition, writing is easy. i used to churn out fiction within an hour, that was how easy writing was for me. but i work from the extremes, so when i hit a slump, i hit it hard. as of right now, i am finding it so hard to write. i do get momentum at times, but when that's broken i find it hard to get back into it. i think the most difficult aspect of writing is properly conveying the scene in the author's mind to the reader. what the author writes and what the reader reads aren't always the same, and i think that being able to achieve that is a feat. when i write, i tend to focus more on emotions and feelings, the intangible. i try to find words so the reader can understand what the character is going through and somehow empathize with them, and i hope each time that that gets across when people read my work.
Write a few sentences or so of your favorite pairing or character.
it's so hard choosing a favorite character. i thought mine was akanishi jin to be honest. to a point, i thought i understood him; i thought i knew him. but it turns out i didn't, and it suddenly feels like the jin i was so fond of writing of wasn't really jin at all. but if i really had to choose, it would be nino. i can always picture nino in a scene. he can always fit. he's the sort of guy who falls into certain character categories, but every now and then, he would do things to surprise you. and i find myself loving about guessing his next move. would he do this? would he do that? he's interesting.
another character i love writing about is yamanaka ino (bet you didn't expect that huh). biases aside, there are so many dimensions to ino that even i'm not sure of. some of them are guesses of mine, and i can't be entirely sure that they're true. another thing about ino is that i feel like i understand her. it's absurd because we share no similar experiences, but it feels like i've been through all of them with her. i can sympathize with her completely that it's so easy to write about her.
Are there any fanfiction trends/cliches that you're sick of?
a lot actually. there are several character cliches that annoy me: aiba being stupid, massu being addicted to food, jin being an airhead--i haven't read fiction in a while, but these i remember i hate the most. they are not one-dimensional characters, they are people who feel and do other things. i'm also sick of original characters who somehow end up with an idol because of one thing or another. some people can pull it off, some just cannot. lastly, mpreg fics scare the shit of me. i do not want to understand how the hell they happen, nor do i want to understand. i don't get why people find this interesting.
since i am currently in my shikamaru/ino phase, i have been reading several fanfiction on them. my biggest annoyance is when people use ino's beauty as an excuse for shikamaru to fall for her. i'm sure that if shikamaru fell for ino's beauty, he wouldn't treat her with such an indifference during the first part of the series. shikamaru isn't that shallow--he isn't going to love somebody because they sported a pretty face and a hot body. there is also the point that ino is more than just pretty. she's annoying, demanding and spoiled. she's tough, independent and manipulative. there are so many different aspects of her, go write about that please.
Are you guilty of any of these? Or have you committed other crimes?
of course there came a time when all my characters felt flat. when i read my earlier fics, it feels like torture sometimes because unless the character isn't the one in the spotlight, i don't bother exploring their other traits.
and yes, guys, i have written arashi fiction wherein i ~*~magically~*~ become aquainted with arashi and we have lots of fun times. this was during the time when the idea of RPS scared me so badly that i couldn't bring myself to write about it (oh how times have changed). i have written several chapters and did several versions. it makes me cringe everytime lol. i think the important point in here is realizing what makes this trend or cliche annoying. if you agree with the reason, then stop doing it. if you don't, do it. it's just that. i hold this ideal that an author is writing because they have something they want to say. they should always uphold whatever they publish. they should be their own biggest fan. they should believe in what they write.
What was the first fandom you wrote for? Do you continue to like/participate in it?
first fandom i wrote for was cardcaptor sakura. i don't remember why it was this fandom, but given that this was an influential part of my life (no seriously) i don't mind at all. i kind of stopped writing for it when the series ended and there was nothing left to read or watch, but my interest returned when tsubasa reservoir chronicles came out. the interest was short lived, but i managed to write another story for the fandom before i completely stopped participating in the fandom. the thing is, even though i don't participate in it anymore, i still like it. it's an amazing fandom, because the characters are so much fun to throw into various situations in. that, and thanks to the magical power of ~*~ALTERNATE UNIVERSES~*~ the possibilities are endless. i have always thought that cardcaptor sakura characters are really flexible. not to mention each of them have so much depth and character that they're fun to come back to.
Name your OTPs or most frequently written pairings/characters and explain what it is about them that you love to write.
oh no, OTP question. i shall try to keep it short. for those in the planet who were not aware, i have OTPs for every johnnys group i like lol. i didn't really mean for it to turn out that way, but something about these pairs attracted me so bad, and who was i to deny a ship? anyway, my two most favorite JE pairs:
01 SAKURAI SHO/MATSUMOTO JUN - i have this huge fetish for best friends. i really do. so sho and jun started out teeny weeny best friends. but then conflict shows up and bam, suddenly they hardly talk to each other to the point that it's unbelievable. i admit that the angsty what-ifs of what happened were what attracted me to this pair. i wanted so much to explain the reason for their drift, and how they can get over that. usually, that was how my fics went. but then they DID get over that distance, and now they've entered an entirely different category. what i love working on when it comes to this pair is that no matter what happens, they always hold a certain respect for each other. they are awkward and clumsy, and even shy but this doesn't change the fact that they acknowledge each other and they think highly of the other.
02 AKANISHI JIN/KAMENASHI KAZUYA - i am going down with this ship. save your meisa comments for some other akame fangirl, because nothing can faze me from this pair. again, if you would notice the best friends drifting apart pattern, it is also found in akame. but the thing that clearly differentiates akame from sakumoto is that first, the drift is so much more noticeable. second, they never made up. third, theirs is an angst that pulls your heart out and tramples it mercilessly on the ground. there is no happy ending for this pair, even i admit it. there will always be something to make you cry or sad. there will always be something to make you frustrated. but the best thing is, they have so much to work on. there is something really fishy about this pair because they have a lot of issues (with themselves, with each other). lots of theories and essays and whatnot were written in hopes of clearing things up, but there is no one answer. i have theories of my own, and i use those to form the beginnings of a fic. what i love the most about this pair, is that their friendship (or ex-friendship) was something precious. and i would like to believe that it was real (the one in their junior days, not the delusional friendship act they put on after their debut). and what i would really love, is for them to have some sort of closure. just that. i wouldn't even expect a hug or an apology. just closure.
when the news about jin got married, i contemplated hard on writing about a fic wherein jin and kame do achieve that closure. i had the entire thing mapped out in my head, with each part of the plot clearly outlined. but i couldn't write it. i couldn't bring myself to. because as much as i would love closure for them, it would mark the end of my ship. because i know that a closure would ensure that no further contact would be initiated. and i can't do that to myself. i don't want to do it to them. in me, there is still that tiny hope that they will someday talk this entire thing out.
and if you have thoughts otherwise, i don't really care about them.
runner up pairs: nishikido ryo/yamashita tomohisa (again, the bestfriends stereotype), nara shikamaru/yamanaka ino, akanishi jin/matsumoto jun
What would you call your writing "style"?
i have no idea. as i said, i'm more interested in how the character's mind works, so i focus on how they perceive the situation, and how they react to it. whatever that style is, that is mine.
Do you read other people's fanfics? If so, what do you find yourself reading the most?
yes. i read random fiction, depending on my whim. the thing is, i lose interest really easily so unless the fic is really good at engaging me, i will have no qualms in leaving it.
Name one thing you'd LOVE to write but haven't yet.
character death.
Do you have trouble taking criticism? Or worse yet, do you have a really bloated ego?
lol yes i do have trouble. like i said, the author should be their biggest fan, so it's hard to just accept someone claiming that something or something isn't good. initially, it hurts. but i get over it, and then i try to understand their side. i consider their suggestion, and i think about whether i want to keep it or not. in the end, i decide on the way i write, but criticism gives me another view. in spite of what people say, i will write for myself. i will never write something because it is what the people want. everything i write, i write because i like it.
When you write is there anything that helps? Music? Quiet room?
solitude, definitely. i need to be alone, or i prefer if i'm the only person awake in the room. i don't mind music, i don't mind the quiet. but i get conscious when other people are with me, especially if they're the type to look over your shoulder while you're writing. unless i'm totally into the story, in which case i can write anywhere.
What inspires you?
anything and everything. i don't have an exact place or person or thing to inspire me. i find that watching the world go by its pace gives me plenty of inspiration. i get inspired during a badmintion game, before an exam, while drinking juice--it just comes. i don't dictate it.
Lastly, how would you sum up your fanfiction experiences and yourself as a writer?
well i've definitely been writing for a long time, and i have changed drastically since i started out. i talked to kieok about it the other night, how i was so intent on pinning my writing style changes on an experience, and she started explaining to me that maybe it's just life doing this to me. and it is true. i'm just someone equipped with a voice and a mind, and i write things as i see them, or as how i want to see them.
i'm just me.
got carried away with that meme. i miss writing so much, i'm not even going to lie. i want to get out of this horrible slump already.