keeponkeeponkeepon
i feel like i need to update whether for personal reference in future situations or just to vent.
i've been sleeping on a couch for the last 9 months.
i've been sleeping on a couch with out A/C for the last 4 months.
i've been sleeping on a couch without A/C in a house that's constantly under construction.
we're currently tearing out the inner walls and ceiling of our living room. we're hoping to insulate, add support beams, fix the central air system, and re-construct the walls and ceilings as soon as feasibly possible.
i constantly get into arguments with my father over money and how it's hard to make money and how he keeps spending it before i earn it.
i spend a majority of my time watching TV when i'm not working. i try calling friends but it always seems hit or miss, and i'm probably wrong, but it always seems like i'm making more calls than i receive...
i went for a walk, 'exploring' my neighborhood and ate at a shrimp shack and picked up some paperbacks at Haslam's. i'm hoping to do more of this.
i go to shows too, roughly once a week. they're usually in Tampa and i always have a great time hanging out at them with my tampa friends and the occasional pinellas friends sprinkled in. a few of my st. pete friends give me shit for it. i wish my st. pete friends would come up to tampa with me more often...
i'm a horrible self-motivator and i have a so-so self opinion of myself. these do not bode well.
i want to get more active to improve the latter, but the former always gets in the way.
i feel like my body has become my biggest enemy. i keep getting pains in the chest and i can't tell if it's hypertension or minor heart attacks or panic/anxiety attacks, or some mixture of all of the above. there's other problems too, but i don't want to go into detail with them in writing.
i wish i had health insurance. i wish i had enough extra money to get health insurance in some form or other.
times at the job are slowly rolling downhill. i've had too many nights making less than $20 in tips. the job at dairy inn is still on hold, but there keeps being promises that it'll start soon.
the situation with the bar is yet another knot in my back. i feel bad i can't help them out as much as i'd like and i really wanna help them, but i keep feeling like i'm being pushed out or plain out of the loop. that's probably partly my fault, but now i don't even know where i stand as far as setting up shows and promoting there.
i talked to a girl at the orpheum a couple weeks ago. i got a number, but no response. by now, that kind of stuff just slides off my back. it doesn't help, nor hurt the self image. i haven't even been on a date since 2005. it's not so much love or romance as it is a desire for support and a partner in crime.
i keep having a desire to hit the road, i've been getting a bout of homesickness strangely. i've also been thinking about getting back into school in some shape or form.
i always feel like i'm not asking much, but that i'm always one step away from knowing how to get to that goal.
i could probably go on, and would, but i'm at a halt as to what else to write.
i've been sleeping on a couch for the last 9 months.
i've been sleeping on a couch with out A/C for the last 4 months.
i've been sleeping on a couch without A/C in a house that's constantly under construction.
we're currently tearing out the inner walls and ceiling of our living room. we're hoping to insulate, add support beams, fix the central air system, and re-construct the walls and ceilings as soon as feasibly possible.
i constantly get into arguments with my father over money and how it's hard to make money and how he keeps spending it before i earn it.
i spend a majority of my time watching TV when i'm not working. i try calling friends but it always seems hit or miss, and i'm probably wrong, but it always seems like i'm making more calls than i receive...
i went for a walk, 'exploring' my neighborhood and ate at a shrimp shack and picked up some paperbacks at Haslam's. i'm hoping to do more of this.
i go to shows too, roughly once a week. they're usually in Tampa and i always have a great time hanging out at them with my tampa friends and the occasional pinellas friends sprinkled in. a few of my st. pete friends give me shit for it. i wish my st. pete friends would come up to tampa with me more often...
i'm a horrible self-motivator and i have a so-so self opinion of myself. these do not bode well.
i want to get more active to improve the latter, but the former always gets in the way.
i feel like my body has become my biggest enemy. i keep getting pains in the chest and i can't tell if it's hypertension or minor heart attacks or panic/anxiety attacks, or some mixture of all of the above. there's other problems too, but i don't want to go into detail with them in writing.
i wish i had health insurance. i wish i had enough extra money to get health insurance in some form or other.
times at the job are slowly rolling downhill. i've had too many nights making less than $20 in tips. the job at dairy inn is still on hold, but there keeps being promises that it'll start soon.
the situation with the bar is yet another knot in my back. i feel bad i can't help them out as much as i'd like and i really wanna help them, but i keep feeling like i'm being pushed out or plain out of the loop. that's probably partly my fault, but now i don't even know where i stand as far as setting up shows and promoting there.
i talked to a girl at the orpheum a couple weeks ago. i got a number, but no response. by now, that kind of stuff just slides off my back. it doesn't help, nor hurt the self image. i haven't even been on a date since 2005. it's not so much love or romance as it is a desire for support and a partner in crime.
i keep having a desire to hit the road, i've been getting a bout of homesickness strangely. i've also been thinking about getting back into school in some shape or form.
i always feel like i'm not asking much, but that i'm always one step away from knowing how to get to that goal.
i could probably go on, and would, but i'm at a halt as to what else to write.