well....
so yah.....i basically came to the conclusion that even though i'm fat....even if i lost the weight i want......it doesn't really matter cause i'm not that attractive.....so whatever....i'm still gonna try my darndest to lose weight but it really isn't gonna change anything......i don't know if thats all from my hormones or if it's cause i have depression....one of the two or both....i've just wanted to cry soo much during the past couple of days it's ridiculous....its like i'll be all up and then i get all down and feel like bawling......ugh......i just wish i wasn't like this.....i don't know......that makes me sounds lazy and stuff but it's not even my body it's just me in general......phhh...whatever......just fuck it.......all