Toothirdie
+++IT IS LATE, I AM DOPED UP, DISREGARD ANYTHING THAT REVEALS THE INNER THOUGHTS OF PHILIP, THEY ARE PROBABLY TOTALLY WRONG. HE WAS JUST CONFUSED (NOT TOMENTION HE GOESON FOREVER).+++
Today I am on vacation. Since Saturday when I arrived on the airplane. The objectives were similar to my last visit: have fun with friends and family, and get some things out of the way. Monday I started helping the neighbors fix their computer, but I was supposed to go and play with my father at the beach. I missed that opportunity because when I came back home he had decided to go to work.
It isn't always about what you are doing or where you are doing it. It's more about just being with your people. I took that advice and spent the rest of the afternoon at the shop with dad, we took apart some chairs for mom and reupholstered them. I was impressed by Ben, he actually put together one of the chairs.
Tuesday I don't really remember what I was doing, I think I spent most of the day taking care of the babies. Or rather just being an uncle, the difference being when they get stinky you can just pass them back to Elissa or Dave.
I also spent time with Elissa; we went to JP's. Women ogled over babies. That was fun. I laugh at my sister because her boobs are so big. Each boob is like a watermelon in her shirt. We walked downtown; I bought some chocolate at the peanut store.
I would like to say that I am not shy, and yet sometimes I embarrass myself because of how uncomfortable I am around people that I know, or don't know. . . How to explain- typically introducing myself in a strange way, or saying silly, immature things. I look at the way that others interact easily- instantly. Hmmm. This is the hardest paragraph to write and understand. At least I know what I mean, and I know how I mean to change myself.
Life is good. So Wednesday I think I fixed the Neighbors computer, or rather took their parts and put them in a working computer we had in the basement. I learned some more things about computers. Unfortunately I don't think that I will ever have enough money to buy my dream computer. I like computers sooooo much, they just get me going . . . BUT I still want to make movies. . . I will explain in a moment.
SO then my whole life it seems is planned, I didn't mention that I had my teeth cleaned, I did on Wednesday. I hung with Jon I think. . . Somebody for sure. . .I think that I was hanging out with Dan Gale. Dan is a really nice guy, but I have a difficult time trusting him since the whole plane ticket incident. I may never understand what that was completely about. He was in a band for a while; he is going to go to MSU in the fall. Anna and Dan talked about MSU . . . Thats where she goes too.
So then ON Thursday I saw Claire and Simon. . . they are just plain cool. We played all day, and I went to a birthday party for one of Simon’s friends Ben, there were only little kids and moms there. That is where some of that awkwardness came in, I wish that I could be a little more cool around people and be more comfortable in the environment that I am placed. It wasn't that it was a totally boring time, I like kids, and I just reacted stilly to certain questions. HMM> > > I Don't know. . . Oke so I really enjoy my sisters company and she cooked some good food for dinner.
Sarah is on a strict diet and she thinks that I don't understand, truth is I do understand and I do believe that it is important for her to eat well. I wish I could do the same, I would feel so much better, and the reality is, the food she cooks really does taste a whole lot better than anything else less wholesome. Ok so I totally envy and respect that, despite all the jokes I make about feeling sorry when she can't eat . . .Insert this or that.
K so then Thursday night I got to spend time with Anna and Jon and Liz and Ben and Ben. Here is where everything gets a bit silly again. I really enjoy everyone’s company but sometimes I just don't understand what they see in me! I feel like such a bum sometimes because I am not doing anything, like whenever I hang out with the people I feel like we are limited to Frisbee golf, talking in the kitchen or looking at something on the computer. These limitations are all created by my own self, my unwillingness to have fun, in the way that Anna and Jon can instantly interact, while I stand awkwardly near by.
I am ok with me, but there are some things that I would like to learn (like proper social interaction things) I don't always have to be a clown so that I can feel accepted (it's all in my head).
Um, yeah so I have had a lot of interesting experiences, including my recent tooth removal (that the Lord for the KNOCK OUT). I have also had some interesting revelations (deep thoughts, conversations in my head about myself and who I want to become). I also had an argument with Dan Eggenschwiler. It's really strange what happened there. But I think that I have grown a lot in these past few days.
SO WHAT ABOUT DAN (this is going to be one of those journals that sounds like it should have be written about a girl)>
Well. It is not simple really; Dan is busy, too busy for me. I thought that he would want to spend time with me; he was probably thinking the same thing in reverse. But here is where it is left to interpretation: When I talked to him on Monday night he had already called me that morning, telling me that he was going to Gun Lake. He already had plans for that; he may have invited me had I answered the phone. The fireworks at night he had plans to meet up with some other people that I didn't know. He was probably thinking that "Phil isn't going to want to hang with people he doesn't know, but that’s ok- all I want is some good time, and some hot women." When I called him later that night I was supposed to invite myself to hang out with him and his new friends, he thought I was uninterested in doing that, that is where dans "Lack of hospitality" comes in (otherwise known as, I don't really care if you do or don't come). I didn't go, but I expected that since I had made the previous 5 phone calls he would call me back the next day. When I called him at the end of the day he had already made plans with someone else, which totally pissed me off. So I Hung up. OK Now that that SOAP DRAMA is done with.
There is just as much to say about Anna, a great women and very attractive. My entire family really likes the Anna and treats her like family. I really appreciate that Anna comes to visit when I am in town, and we also have some really good phone conversations when I am in FL. Speaking in general she is the type of woman that a guy like Phil needs to marry someday.
Jon White is a really great friend, I am really glad that I get to spend time with him. Every time that I see him he has something new, a trick a gadget or funny joke. The guy is a barrel of funniness. He also has some really great business plans as well, of which I am not allowed to disclose. I promised. So, that's about all, I still believe in Ooeb.
So everyone (including himself) really want to know what is in the head of Phil regarding dating, a special friend, a wife. Lets set down the facts- he has never had a GF and he insists that it is because he was too busy in high school, portions of that could be validated, but not all. He missed a lot of dances, the excuse being- it will never matter in 20 years, reality, he was too afraid to dance (because he can't) or ask the girl that he really would have wanted to go with. Now of course, there are no women, FS is full of Dykes and . . . . That’s about it. Plus my current life schedule doesn't exactly leave time for a relationship.
So I am lonely sometimes, and I wonder how that will all work out, who she will be, when and where I will meet her (maybe I have already met her, I just haven't realized it yet)? Who I will be, what I will be like?
Um so tomorrow I am going to spend with more family and the eye doctor and um. . Whatever else I can think of. Then I leave on SUNDAY. Yeah. I am done typing for today.
Today I am on vacation. Since Saturday when I arrived on the airplane. The objectives were similar to my last visit: have fun with friends and family, and get some things out of the way. Monday I started helping the neighbors fix their computer, but I was supposed to go and play with my father at the beach. I missed that opportunity because when I came back home he had decided to go to work.
It isn't always about what you are doing or where you are doing it. It's more about just being with your people. I took that advice and spent the rest of the afternoon at the shop with dad, we took apart some chairs for mom and reupholstered them. I was impressed by Ben, he actually put together one of the chairs.
Tuesday I don't really remember what I was doing, I think I spent most of the day taking care of the babies. Or rather just being an uncle, the difference being when they get stinky you can just pass them back to Elissa or Dave.
I also spent time with Elissa; we went to JP's. Women ogled over babies. That was fun. I laugh at my sister because her boobs are so big. Each boob is like a watermelon in her shirt. We walked downtown; I bought some chocolate at the peanut store.
I would like to say that I am not shy, and yet sometimes I embarrass myself because of how uncomfortable I am around people that I know, or don't know. . . How to explain- typically introducing myself in a strange way, or saying silly, immature things. I look at the way that others interact easily- instantly. Hmmm. This is the hardest paragraph to write and understand. At least I know what I mean, and I know how I mean to change myself.
Life is good. So Wednesday I think I fixed the Neighbors computer, or rather took their parts and put them in a working computer we had in the basement. I learned some more things about computers. Unfortunately I don't think that I will ever have enough money to buy my dream computer. I like computers sooooo much, they just get me going . . . BUT I still want to make movies. . . I will explain in a moment.
SO then my whole life it seems is planned, I didn't mention that I had my teeth cleaned, I did on Wednesday. I hung with Jon I think. . . Somebody for sure. . .I think that I was hanging out with Dan Gale. Dan is a really nice guy, but I have a difficult time trusting him since the whole plane ticket incident. I may never understand what that was completely about. He was in a band for a while; he is going to go to MSU in the fall. Anna and Dan talked about MSU . . . Thats where she goes too.
So then ON Thursday I saw Claire and Simon. . . they are just plain cool. We played all day, and I went to a birthday party for one of Simon’s friends Ben, there were only little kids and moms there. That is where some of that awkwardness came in, I wish that I could be a little more cool around people and be more comfortable in the environment that I am placed. It wasn't that it was a totally boring time, I like kids, and I just reacted stilly to certain questions. HMM> > > I Don't know. . . Oke so I really enjoy my sisters company and she cooked some good food for dinner.
Sarah is on a strict diet and she thinks that I don't understand, truth is I do understand and I do believe that it is important for her to eat well. I wish I could do the same, I would feel so much better, and the reality is, the food she cooks really does taste a whole lot better than anything else less wholesome. Ok so I totally envy and respect that, despite all the jokes I make about feeling sorry when she can't eat . . .Insert this or that.
K so then Thursday night I got to spend time with Anna and Jon and Liz and Ben and Ben. Here is where everything gets a bit silly again. I really enjoy everyone’s company but sometimes I just don't understand what they see in me! I feel like such a bum sometimes because I am not doing anything, like whenever I hang out with the people I feel like we are limited to Frisbee golf, talking in the kitchen or looking at something on the computer. These limitations are all created by my own self, my unwillingness to have fun, in the way that Anna and Jon can instantly interact, while I stand awkwardly near by.
I am ok with me, but there are some things that I would like to learn (like proper social interaction things) I don't always have to be a clown so that I can feel accepted (it's all in my head).
Um, yeah so I have had a lot of interesting experiences, including my recent tooth removal (that the Lord for the KNOCK OUT). I have also had some interesting revelations (deep thoughts, conversations in my head about myself and who I want to become). I also had an argument with Dan Eggenschwiler. It's really strange what happened there. But I think that I have grown a lot in these past few days.
SO WHAT ABOUT DAN (this is going to be one of those journals that sounds like it should have be written about a girl)>
Well. It is not simple really; Dan is busy, too busy for me. I thought that he would want to spend time with me; he was probably thinking the same thing in reverse. But here is where it is left to interpretation: When I talked to him on Monday night he had already called me that morning, telling me that he was going to Gun Lake. He already had plans for that; he may have invited me had I answered the phone. The fireworks at night he had plans to meet up with some other people that I didn't know. He was probably thinking that "Phil isn't going to want to hang with people he doesn't know, but that’s ok- all I want is some good time, and some hot women." When I called him later that night I was supposed to invite myself to hang out with him and his new friends, he thought I was uninterested in doing that, that is where dans "Lack of hospitality" comes in (otherwise known as, I don't really care if you do or don't come). I didn't go, but I expected that since I had made the previous 5 phone calls he would call me back the next day. When I called him at the end of the day he had already made plans with someone else, which totally pissed me off. So I Hung up. OK Now that that SOAP DRAMA is done with.
There is just as much to say about Anna, a great women and very attractive. My entire family really likes the Anna and treats her like family. I really appreciate that Anna comes to visit when I am in town, and we also have some really good phone conversations when I am in FL. Speaking in general she is the type of woman that a guy like Phil needs to marry someday.
Jon White is a really great friend, I am really glad that I get to spend time with him. Every time that I see him he has something new, a trick a gadget or funny joke. The guy is a barrel of funniness. He also has some really great business plans as well, of which I am not allowed to disclose. I promised. So, that's about all, I still believe in Ooeb.
So everyone (including himself) really want to know what is in the head of Phil regarding dating, a special friend, a wife. Lets set down the facts- he has never had a GF and he insists that it is because he was too busy in high school, portions of that could be validated, but not all. He missed a lot of dances, the excuse being- it will never matter in 20 years, reality, he was too afraid to dance (because he can't) or ask the girl that he really would have wanted to go with. Now of course, there are no women, FS is full of Dykes and . . . . That’s about it. Plus my current life schedule doesn't exactly leave time for a relationship.
So I am lonely sometimes, and I wonder how that will all work out, who she will be, when and where I will meet her (maybe I have already met her, I just haven't realized it yet)? Who I will be, what I will be like?
Um so tomorrow I am going to spend with more family and the eye doctor and um. . Whatever else I can think of. Then I leave on SUNDAY. Yeah. I am done typing for today.