all stripped down
Like everyone, my perspective on life is informed by things I have done, people I have met, places I’ve been. I am a collection of all my life experiences.
I am also fundamentally unpatriotic. I don’t care about flags.
I think borders are arbitrary devices for dividing human culture, sometimes tragically so.
~
To say that Canadians have a complicated relationship with Americans is an understatement. Complicated from the Canadian point of view, that is. Americans hardly ever think about Canadians, unless they happen to know one, or are going up north for vacation.
But most Canadians have a love-hate relationship with America. We tend to focus on the hate part of that equation by tapping into our entrenched resentment through humour. We are deeply bothered by the fact that most Americans don’t know anything about us, and delight in making fun of them for it. We begrudge the power that Americans have in the world, not that we want it for ourselves, mind you. We’re far too peaceful a nation to covet such things! But, dammit, why should they have it? And why must they wield it so arrogantly? I mean, 99 percent of them don’t even know who the Prime Minister of Canada is! You could ask the dumbest hick in Canada who the President of the U.S. is and get a correct answer. Why does ignorance deserve power?
In our darkest, most hateful moments, we believe Americans to be self-absorbed, money-hungry, gun-toting, celebrity-obsessed, rhetoric-spouting, narrow-minded, self-important ego maniacs who think all Canadians talk like Bob and Doug McKenzie and live in igloos.
But on the other hand, we really like the movies they make. And the music!
Don’t forget TV. We love TV!
And we don’t mind the fact that Americans pay through the nose for health care and pharmaceuticals so that the rest of the world can benefit from ground-breaking medical research. Hey…. thanks, eh?
Also, the constitution. Now that was a nifty idea.
And we want them to keep buying our natural resources, cuz, you know, we need the money. This capitalism thing works out well for us, too, after all. In fact, we pretty much depend on a strong American economy.
Dude, we’d be hosed without it.
But aside from the fact that our country would be seriously handicapped without the innovative, entrepreneurial, boldness of America as our neighbour, we still think we’re better!
More compassionate, more enlightened, more tolerant.
Greener, thinner, smarter.
We have better beer, air and public schools.
We have more space, wilderness and water.
We’re funnier! And nicer!
And more humble!
Right.
~
Now that I live in America, I’m experiencing something that surprises me. Of course, given everything I just talked about, I know it shouldn’t surprise me. But it does anyway.
Some people who know me well - Canadians - are uncomfortable with me being here. Disturbed. Upset. Confused. Worried. They really don’t like it one bit.
This bugs me.
I mean, I get it. I am Canadian, after all. I understand. And I may have even felt the same way had someone close to me moved to America instead of the other way around.
But now that I’m here, I also understand something else: we are all so very susceptible to being held captive by our often flimsily formed perceptions. Myself included, of course. It just feels safer to weed through empirical data to find stuff that fits into our already-established world view, rather than let a wide range of empirical data reshape our world view as we go along. As a species, we really don’t like to let go of dearly held beliefs. It’s too risky. It can turn your life up-side-down.
We like things to stay the way we've always believed them to be.
But sometimes, the non-conforming data builds up such that you can no longer ignore it. You must either re-evaluate or, you know, embrace denial.
~
So here I am, in America, confronted with matching up my long-held cultural perceptions of Americans to the reality of my experience. And I love being in this position. It’s one of the reasons I didn’t hesitate to take this job. It’s the primary reason I’ve travelled to a bunch of very different countries over the years. I find it fascinating to immerse myself in different cultures and open my mind to new ideas, increased understanding. I probably should have been an anthropologist.
And here’s the thing: Americans don’t know who the Canadian Prime Minister is because they don’t need to know. It just so happens that he has very little effect on them or the world.
Americans live in the most powerful country in the world, yes. This is a blessing, curse and monstrous responsibility. Sometimes they do great things. Sometimes they do shitty things. Sometimes they engage in huge, messy, complicated arrangements of great and shitty things all at once. One day they won’t be the biggest, most powerful country anymore, and another group of hapless humans will take on the task of setting the bar. If we don’t kill ourselves off first, that is. Such is the evolution of our species.
And of course the truth is that there are just as many (I’m talking percentage-wise here) self-absorbed, money-hungry, gun-toting, celebrity-obsessed, rhetoric-spouting, narrow-minded, self-important ego maniacs in Canada as there are in America. You can also add smug to that list.
And, as it turns out, there are plenty of brilliant, funny, educated, open-minded, thoughtful and genuinely warm and kind people in America, too. Imagine that. In fact, I’ve never met so many people all in one spot that I’ve felt such a strong connection with. People with whom I can laugh and drink wine, talk politics and religion, and share love for great tunes. I’ve only been here six months and I’ve actually made friends. I never do that!
Canada is a fabulous place, an amazing land to call home. I will always cherish and protect my Canadian core. I could very well move back there one day. Maybe even soon.
But I also appreciate America for what it is, has been and could be.
Even the nasty bits.
Because no country is without heinous history.
Except maybe Switzerland.
Maybe I should move there next.