Invisible Rain
I'm sifting through mail from colleges, still clueless of where I want to go and what exactly I want to do, while I'm waiting for the sign up time window to photobucket so i can attempt to copy celebrity photos and put them on my site.
I am firmly pondering about staying here and attending Edison for 2 years. The negatives: I won't be away from my parents,
I won't be in a new town with absolute freedom,
I won't be able to start over.
The positives: I will be accompanied by Caitlyn and Sara.
I will most likely be rooming with Caitlyn (still too close to my parents but at least I will have a bit more freedom)
I can maintain a job in a familiar place while I start my cushion for when I move away.
I will still be by my family and most of my friends
I wont have the anxiety of starting over and being in a new place since I've never lived outside of Lehigh given the 1st two years of my life in Ft. Myers.
I can still mooch off my parents
So yes. the good outways the bad. Plus, I don't have any idea of what college I want to attend outside of Lehigh. I want to get away to a new town. I want to start my life in a new place, but I don't want to drown myself and fail in the process. Just the thought of me being close to that age and time where I can be out on my own is simply amazing. I still feel like a 12 yr old. One who lives in her head and could play video games for hours. I guess growing up doesn't mean growing old, it just means gaining knowledge and responsibility which I am more than happy to have. I am looking forward to the new chapters to add to my life story. I want my independence and my freedom. And it is so close I can taste it. . .
Due to unfortunate circumstances of Miss Spag I am now Stage Manager for the plays instead of Assistant. We have swapped positions and I am quite pleased. I like the added responsibility instead of just being someone's puppy. Last meeting all i did was color posters with Jon the Spag didn't want to do so thus I was forced to. This time, I got to run errands and such. I like that responsibility and since of authority that I can use bossing the cast and crew around, Muahhahahaha, not that I will be mean about it, but just knowing I could and get away with it is a cool thing. Yeah, Shawn in Margie's pants yesterday. That was a trip. I wish I had a picture to look at every morning and chuckle to myself. Teehee. It was funny stuff. . .
I don't know who I like. I have mini-crushes on people I suppose but those are the ones that don't seem interested in me or for the matter even talk to me much, maybe that is why I like them. The ones that do like me and flirt with me I would never want to be with. Not in a mean way, just, they aren't my type. Dwayne keeps calling my cell. He called today at 8:30 and that pissed me off. It woke me up. SO i ignored it and turned the phone off. Logan was mad macking yesterday which was funny and I kind of played along though I could have gotten majorly pissed at him and he would've stopped, but I guess I kind of was intrigued by it a little, the fact that someone was flirting with me. That's always a nice feeling though it is kind of rude to lead them on. No more of that I suppose. John is starting to look real cute, not that he hasn't before, but it's more of just a really good friend thing. He reminds me too much of my brother. When he flirts with me I feel super, but it doesn't mean anything. Just the fact that i find him attractive and he thinks likewise is pretty cool. I miss Kevin. Tear. Yeah the flirting, but I miss my good friend. Just when I was getting so close to him, he leaves. Bastard. But it wasn't his decision and he does still keep in contact with me so that's cool. I must hang out with him soon. Anycrap. . . I'm just spouting random stuff now.
I shall go. I'll write more of my adventures later.
Muah
I am firmly pondering about staying here and attending Edison for 2 years. The negatives: I won't be away from my parents,
I won't be in a new town with absolute freedom,
I won't be able to start over.
The positives: I will be accompanied by Caitlyn and Sara.
I will most likely be rooming with Caitlyn (still too close to my parents but at least I will have a bit more freedom)
I can maintain a job in a familiar place while I start my cushion for when I move away.
I will still be by my family and most of my friends
I wont have the anxiety of starting over and being in a new place since I've never lived outside of Lehigh given the 1st two years of my life in Ft. Myers.
I can still mooch off my parents
So yes. the good outways the bad. Plus, I don't have any idea of what college I want to attend outside of Lehigh. I want to get away to a new town. I want to start my life in a new place, but I don't want to drown myself and fail in the process. Just the thought of me being close to that age and time where I can be out on my own is simply amazing. I still feel like a 12 yr old. One who lives in her head and could play video games for hours. I guess growing up doesn't mean growing old, it just means gaining knowledge and responsibility which I am more than happy to have. I am looking forward to the new chapters to add to my life story. I want my independence and my freedom. And it is so close I can taste it. . .
Due to unfortunate circumstances of Miss Spag I am now Stage Manager for the plays instead of Assistant. We have swapped positions and I am quite pleased. I like the added responsibility instead of just being someone's puppy. Last meeting all i did was color posters with Jon the Spag didn't want to do so thus I was forced to. This time, I got to run errands and such. I like that responsibility and since of authority that I can use bossing the cast and crew around, Muahhahahaha, not that I will be mean about it, but just knowing I could and get away with it is a cool thing. Yeah, Shawn in Margie's pants yesterday. That was a trip. I wish I had a picture to look at every morning and chuckle to myself. Teehee. It was funny stuff. . .
I don't know who I like. I have mini-crushes on people I suppose but those are the ones that don't seem interested in me or for the matter even talk to me much, maybe that is why I like them. The ones that do like me and flirt with me I would never want to be with. Not in a mean way, just, they aren't my type. Dwayne keeps calling my cell. He called today at 8:30 and that pissed me off. It woke me up. SO i ignored it and turned the phone off. Logan was mad macking yesterday which was funny and I kind of played along though I could have gotten majorly pissed at him and he would've stopped, but I guess I kind of was intrigued by it a little, the fact that someone was flirting with me. That's always a nice feeling though it is kind of rude to lead them on. No more of that I suppose. John is starting to look real cute, not that he hasn't before, but it's more of just a really good friend thing. He reminds me too much of my brother. When he flirts with me I feel super, but it doesn't mean anything. Just the fact that i find him attractive and he thinks likewise is pretty cool. I miss Kevin. Tear. Yeah the flirting, but I miss my good friend. Just when I was getting so close to him, he leaves. Bastard. But it wasn't his decision and he does still keep in contact with me so that's cool. I must hang out with him soon. Anycrap. . . I'm just spouting random stuff now.
I shall go. I'll write more of my adventures later.
Muah