contemplations
Lately I realized that my philosophy of life has gone full circle.
As a teen and young adult, I held fun as my goal and life's purpose. Not that I didn't work hard, I did, but I always made sure that fun was a high priority. In college, I would advise the incoming students to drink heavily, smoke pot and have lots of sex. I went to the University of Chicago, a very high stress school. It was important, nay, imperative, to have a way to blow off stress, or one would go insane. Think of me as the Val Kilmer character in Real Genius.
Then I got married. Then he got sick, and for seven years, keeping him healthy was my goal. Not good for me, I know now, but then, it seemed the only thing I could do. Fun didn't enter into it.
Maybe part of my tolerance for my current circumstances rests in my burnout from those years. I'm not interested in high moral issues or serious problems. I just want to have fun, and whatever else R is, he is a lot of fun.
January 10th will be the fourth anniversary of our meeting. We have lived together over two and half of those years. One wouldn't think that life with a sex offender could be so ordinary and comfortable, but there we are. We watch TV (more than I ever would alone), we go to estate sales (compulsively every weekend), he does crossword puzzles and I read. And we make love twice a day, every day. My life is hot and sweet and comfy as old flannel pajamas.
I am finally having fun.
As a teen and young adult, I held fun as my goal and life's purpose. Not that I didn't work hard, I did, but I always made sure that fun was a high priority. In college, I would advise the incoming students to drink heavily, smoke pot and have lots of sex. I went to the University of Chicago, a very high stress school. It was important, nay, imperative, to have a way to blow off stress, or one would go insane. Think of me as the Val Kilmer character in Real Genius.
Then I got married. Then he got sick, and for seven years, keeping him healthy was my goal. Not good for me, I know now, but then, it seemed the only thing I could do. Fun didn't enter into it.
Maybe part of my tolerance for my current circumstances rests in my burnout from those years. I'm not interested in high moral issues or serious problems. I just want to have fun, and whatever else R is, he is a lot of fun.
January 10th will be the fourth anniversary of our meeting. We have lived together over two and half of those years. One wouldn't think that life with a sex offender could be so ordinary and comfortable, but there we are. We watch TV (more than I ever would alone), we go to estate sales (compulsively every weekend), he does crossword puzzles and I read. And we make love twice a day, every day. My life is hot and sweet and comfy as old flannel pajamas.
I am finally having fun.