A fair and square deal: Unknown status of severity of ADHD...
Mom and i are still fighting and things are becoming more and more on the rocks. She's thrown in that she cries every time we argue because she does not have the energy left. I don't write this as a "yea right wtf.. bitch!" ... i write it because i dont know how to totally control what goes on in my head evidently. I don't listen to anyone that tells me anything because i auto-defend myself.. and i'm starting to see that i'm becoming very.. complacent in my position with some of my friends that i'm doing it to them now too... and i did it to my psychologist... and i do it to everyone.
I HATE having ADHD, because unless i seek out change in someway.. i can juts convince myself to just stay here the rest of my life and get even more fat and stupid and lazy. And it's true, iv'e watched my dad do it. I don't want to live on unemployment, i don't want to live alone and with my parents the rest of my life. But my mom's got a point -- at the rate i'm doing it... why not? ... How can i change without stopping this bandwagon routine?
I've gained weight again, I'm probably back to 275 at the worst, sad to say it but i've been on my ass everyday of the week. I hardly clean -- mom's getting realy shit off at how long it takes me before i'm tired. "You shouldn't have to rest when you clean". This being said people we have a really SMALL house, like two rooms, one bathroom and open plan living/kitchen. (Most people think massive apartment i think dinky 85 sq meter house.)
I'm on SL, MSN etc way too much and at a detriment to everything else.
Am i subjecting myself to self torutre... parental torture? I Dont' know, i seriously don't know..
Without a psycholgoist to tell me how much of a retard i am, i dont know.
I HATE having ADHD, because unless i seek out change in someway.. i can juts convince myself to just stay here the rest of my life and get even more fat and stupid and lazy. And it's true, iv'e watched my dad do it. I don't want to live on unemployment, i don't want to live alone and with my parents the rest of my life. But my mom's got a point -- at the rate i'm doing it... why not? ... How can i change without stopping this bandwagon routine?
I've gained weight again, I'm probably back to 275 at the worst, sad to say it but i've been on my ass everyday of the week. I hardly clean -- mom's getting realy shit off at how long it takes me before i'm tired. "You shouldn't have to rest when you clean". This being said people we have a really SMALL house, like two rooms, one bathroom and open plan living/kitchen. (Most people think massive apartment i think dinky 85 sq meter house.)
I'm on SL, MSN etc way too much and at a detriment to everything else.
Am i subjecting myself to self torutre... parental torture? I Dont' know, i seriously don't know..
Without a psycholgoist to tell me how much of a retard i am, i dont know.