Fic: In Flux (2/5)
Title: In Flux
Author:
pterawaters
Artist:
bulisen
Word Count: 15,800 (total)
Characters: Kurt, Puck, Blaine, Hudmels, Mercedes, etc
Pairing(s): Kurt/Blaine, Kurt/Puck
Genre: Supernatural/Drama/Romance
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Gender mutability
Author's Note: Written for Round 2 of the
kurtbigbang. Archive link to the whole thing. Drawings awesomely made by
bulisen. Written before S3, so no spoilers there.
Summary: Kurt never thought losing his virginity would also mean losing his gender and by extension, his boyfriend. When a chance encounter with Puck proves his old self wasn't gone for good, Kurt figures his life is set again. It's too bad he never asked Puck what he thought of the arrangement.
Part 1
Part 2
On Monday, Burt called Kurt in sick to Dalton and then called McKinley, saying his brother's kid, who'd been raised overseas and didn't have records, was his responsibility now. "And you're gonna have to take some exams," he explained to Kurt over lunch, "so they can place you in the right grade. Figgins is setting it up for tomorrow."
"What kind of exams?" Kurt asked. Wouldn't that suck if he managed to test down a grade because Figgins didn't know what he was doing?
"Like, some SAT practice tests and a math test. I'm sure you'll do great, kiddo. They got ya studying nonstop over at Dalton, right?"
"Right," Kurt sighed, taking another bite of his sandwich. It was starting to set in that maybe, after three mornings of waking up as a girl, this was it. Barring sex reassignment surgery, Kurt was always going to be female.
Blaine showed up after school, while Kurt's parents were still at work and Finn was at glee. And Kurt had to answer the door in a girl top, didn't he?
"Oh, hi, Blaine," Kurt greeted his boyfriend, crossing his arms across his chest to try to minimize the change. "Please, come in."
"Hey," Blaine replied with his nervous smile, passing Kurt on the way in. "Sorry it took me so long to come by. I was being an idiot."
Kurt closed the door behind him and sighed in relief. "I'm sorry you have to deal with this, and I don't blame you for taking your time. This is like, every gay boy's nightmare. From both sides of the issue."
Blaine let Kurt take his hand and lead him into the living room as he asked, "How do you mean?"
"I mean," Kurt said, sitting on the couch with plenty of space for Blaine to fit comfortably as well, "it's like God got tired of me being so effeminate and just finished the job."
"I thought you didn't believe in God," Blaine pointed out chuckling softly and not quite meeting Kurt's eye.
"Before this weekend I didn't believe genders could change in the absence of major surgery, but poof!" Kurt explained, holding his hands out in a little gesture of presentation. "I lose my virginity and become a girl. Tends to make one a little wary of absolute truths."
"You still sound the same," Blaine said with a hint of awe, "and not just your voice. You're the same person, aren't you?"
Kurt didn't even have to think before replying, "Yep. Same old me, just a change of window dressing. I mean, I still feel like a boy, or like being male is right for me, you know?"
"Just ... trapped in a girl's body?" Blaine asked slowly, looking Kurt up and down again. When Kurt nodded, Blaine shrugged a little and sighed. "So I guess this means you're not coming back to Dalton."
"I'm afraid not," Kurt replied, wanting to take Blaine's hand but having no idea whether the gesture would be appreciated or not. "Tomorrow I'm starting school as my own cousin, Katrina Hummel, daughter of Andy and Dena Hummel. Born..." Shit. Kurt knew this. He'd been practicing over and over again since Puck dropped off the ID with Finn the night before. "Oh! October seventeenth, nineteen ninety-three. A couple months younger, but who's counting?"
"Does that mean I have to remember two birthdays?" Blaine asked with a smile and Kurt couldn't help but smile back, just a little.
"Only if you're sticking with me despite my deformities," Kurt answered, gesturing at his body. "Could you be with me like that?"
Blaine shrugged again, meeting Kurt's eyes briefly before admitting, "I don't know. I know this isn't your fault, I know I love the person inside that body, and I feel like that should be enough, but when it comes down to it? I don't know."
The fact that Kurt had been expecting this from Blaine did nothing to make it hurt any less. His uncertain words cut at Kurt's gut like a knife, stealing his breath and making his eyes feel warm with the weight of tears he desperately held back.
Blaine's compassion was almost overwhelming when he gave Kurt that hurt-by-proxy look and stepped forward to hug him. It wasn't everything, but it was hope.
~~**~~
Kurt took his tests at McKinley and while they occupied most of his day, he felt like he'd done fairly well. As he presented Mrs. Pillsbury with his exams, he felt a smile spread onto his face. His life may have been one big ball of suck at that moment, but at least he still had a brain he could rely on.
Since the school day was almost over, Kurt decided to stick around for the New Directions' after school rehearsal. He texted Mercedes so she could accompany him in and introduce "Katrina" to the room, and then waited in his car for her to come get him.
Before class let out, though, there was a sharp rap on his window, which made Kurt's heart leap in surprise. Looking up, he saw Puck grinning at him from the other side of his window. Turning his key in the ignition
so the power would come on, Kurt lowered his window and frowned, "Aren't you supposed to be in class, Puck?"
"Eh," he shrugged. "Call it Senioritis."
"You're still a Junior," Kurt pointed out dryly, which earned him a small chuckle.
"You joinin' glee for the rest of the year?" Puck asked, leaning closer with both hands on Kurt's door.
Kurt gave Puck's hands a look of distaste and replied, "I'd like to. It doesn't seem like my ... condition ... is going to reverse itself anytime soon, so I'll be stuck here anyway."
"Hey," Puck grinned again, "bright side: you'll be able to sing all those girl songs you like without Schue complaining!"
Sighing (because he knew Puck was right and what that said about their teacher) Kurt asked, "Are you here for a reason? Besides harassing me, I mean."
"Yeah," Puck said, clearing his throat softly. "I gotta proposition for ya."
Kurt didn't like where this was headed, but he raised a questioning eyebrow anyway.
"Right," Puck nodded, leaning even closer. "So did Aretha tell you about me and Zizes?"
"Briefly," Kurt nodded, remembering his confusion upon learning that Puck had apparently fallen for someone unconventionally pretty.
"She tell you about how Lauren broke up with me the night before prom so she could go with her ex?"
Kurt gasped. The great Noah Puckerman had been dateless for prom? Realizing Puck was waiting for an answer, Kurt shook his head.
"Well she did," the boy practically spat, "and so I've got the need for a little revenge."
"You aren't going to ask me to vandalize something, are you?"
"No," Puck laughed, looking away - a gesture Kurt wanted to kick himself for thinking was the tiniest bit cute. "I was thinking I got this Lauren thing and you're gonna have a rep problem by the end of your first day, so we should join forces."
"Rep problem?" Kurt asked, confused. "How so?"
"Look, I know I ain't smart or whatever," Puck admitted and Kurt snorted at the irony of the statement, "but I know this school. By lunch you're gonna be three things - the new girl, Kurt's cousin, and a loser who joined glee right away. Unless..."
Kurt wanted to play along and ask, "Unless what?" but he was afraid of the answer Puck might give. Instead, he rolled his eyes and muttered, "Why would I care about my reputation? It's not like I'm a different person, really."
"But you are!" Puck insisted with another one of those grins. "You're a chick, which means it's cool to be into fashion and chick flicks and all that crap. And it really doesn't hurt that you're hot," Puck shrugged and Kurt wanted to laugh in his face.
"Yeah, right," he scoffed instead, wondering exactly how rude it would be to roll up the window so Puck would stop talking about this. Kurt just wanted to be back to normal, in his normal skin, with his perfect, normal boyfriend.
"You are!" Puck insisted. "You really wanna waste this chance to own McKinley? You could be head bitch, Kurt," Puck whispered, almost seductively. "You could shut Karofsky out of the inner circle. You could shut out anyone who ever fucked with you."
"Including you?" Kurt asked coolly, though he couldn't say Puck's words were having no affect on him.
Puck smirked - damn that smarmy-ass smirk - and shrugged, "If you want, though I'm hoping you'll want to keep me around by then."
Kurt thought for a moment - it would be nice to have someone recognize his superiority for once - before meeting Puck's eyes and asking, "What would I have to do?"
Puck leaned in even further, crossing his arms over Kurt's windowsill and grinning as he replied, "Be my girlfriend."
"What?" Kurt asked, fighting the urge to punch Puck in the face. "I'm with Blaine! We're trying to work things out."
"Just at school then," Puck amended, following Kurt's eyes with his own like he was trying to pry an answer from him. "You'll get a badass rep, since I've been to Juvie, and I'll get to show Lauren I can still date the hottest chick in this place."
"You...?" Kurt stuttered, really looking at Puck's apparently honest expression. "You think I'm the hottest girl in school?"
"For sure," Puck replied with no hesitation, meeting Kurt's eye with a smile.
"And it doesn't bother you that despite current appearances, I still consider myself to be a guy?" Kurt cried, fairly certain by now that Puck was playing a joke on him, using that damn poker face of his.
"Hey, the fewer crazy female thoughts rattling around in there," he pointed at Kurt's head, "the better we'll get along. Chicks, man. Fucking confusing."
"So you see my world turning upside-down, my life irrevocably changed, and my old body gone as some sort of windfall for you?" Kurt asked, shaking his head. "I'm sorry. Even the lure of absolute power isn't enough to make me want to pretend to be your girlfriend, Puckerman. Now if you'll excuse me," Kurt pressed the button that would raise his window, dislodging Puck and making him back up with a start. Before the window reached the top, Kurt called out, "Tell Mercedes I went home. I'm not feeling well enough for glee club."
With that, he pulled out of his parking spot and drove off, leaving Puck alone in the lot.
~~**~~
By Thursday, Kurt had been accepted back into all his old junior-level classes so he could finish out the last two months of the school year - as Kat. Before school started, Kurt made his way to the Spanish room, knocking on the door when he saw Mr. Schue at his desk. "Um, Mr. Schuester, right?"
The teacher looked up and with a slightly confused expression, nodded. "Can I help you with something?"
"Yeah," Kurt replied, stepping further into the room. "I just transferred here and my cousin told me you were the guy to talk to about joining glee club." He found it beyond weird talking about himself in the third person completely un-ironically.
"Your...?" Schue started to ask, but then it must have clicked because he pointed at Kurt and said, "Let me guess. You're Kurt Hummel's cousin!"
Kurt nodded, "Guilty," and stepped forward, offering his hand to the teacher. "Katrina Hummel. Kat for short."
Mr. Schue shook Kurt's hand and chuckled, "Kurt and Kat, huh?"
"Our parents had an odd sense of humor," Kurt shrugged. "Anyway, I moved in with my Uncle Burt, so I go here now. Kurt's always going on and on about glee club, so I thought it would be fun. A good way to meet people, you know."
"Oh, you're gonna love it!" Mr. Schue agreed enthusiastically. He jotted down something on a post-it and handed it across his desk to Kurt. "We have rehearsal in this room after school. You should come by. We're really starting to gear up for nationals."
Smiling at the thought of watching all his old friends bicker over and practice their songs of the day, Kurt felt better than he had for almost a week. Nodding, he promised, "I'll be there."
~~**~~
For some reason, Figgins decided it was appropriate to give Kurt his old locker back, so he didn't have to fumble around with the combination for more than a few seconds before he got it open. Unfortunately, he hadn't thought to bring any decorations or organizational structures, so right now, his locker was just a stack of books and papers, all given to him the afternoon before by the well-meaning principal.
The mess meant he spent too long at his locker, trying to unbury his math book, and Azimio found him before he could meet Mercedes at her locker for a little moral support.
"Hey, sweet cheeks," the football player greeted him, "You have to be new, 'cause there's no way I walked past that ass every day for the last three years without noticing!"
Really not in the mood to deal with creepy jocks, Kurt scoffed in disgust and refused to answer, looking away and making to leave until a broad chest stopped him.
"Hummel, is that you?" the person before him asked, and looking up, Kurt saw that it was Karofsky. Fantastic.
"I'm a Hummel, not that it's any of your business," he lied, trying to push past the jock without touching him if at all possible. Unfortunately, he and Azimio closed ranks meaning Kurt would really have to force his way past them. "What?"
"You're a Hummel?" Azimio asked with a laugh. "I always thought there was just the one of you."
"I'm Kurt's cousin, Katrina," he explained, trying to look past Karofsky for any sign of Mercedes or Finn. "Get out of my way."
"Did you hear that, Azimio?" Karofsky laughed, and Kurt really had to wonder why the jock felt the need to bully girls as well as other gay guys. "Little girl Hummel wants us to get out of her way."
"Unfortunately," Azimio said, leaning down a little to look Kurt square in the eye, "there's a toll in effect today. Can't let you go without payment." He puckered up his lips for a kiss and Kurt wondered how many girls at McKinley he'd done this to before.
A Mercedes-like voice in Kurt's head screamed, "Aw hell to the no!" so Kurt did the only thing he could think of. He grabbed Azimio's waistband with his free hand and pulled, bringing his knee up between the boy's legs. The move was so unexpected that Kurt made pretty good contact, wincing in the tiniest bit of sympathy for the guy.
For a heartbeat or two, nothing happened, but then Azimio let out a soft, keening breath and fell to the ground, cupping his nuts with both hands. Smirking, Kurt asked, "Does that satisfy your toll?"
Karofsky stood back in shock, so Kurt decided the best move would be to saunter away, owning that little piece of violence. By the way everyone's eyes followed him in awe, Kurt thought maybe Puck had the right idea about this being an opportunity to reinvent his image. Sure, he had to look like a girl to do it, but hey - every plot for school domination required a little bit of compromise. Just ask Coach Sylvester.
~~**~~
"Dude," Puck said when he ambushed Kurt in the girls' room between classes, "you gotta go out with me now."
"Dude," Kurt replied as he washed his hands, "no. And you're not allowed in here, Puckerman."
Puck ignored Kurt's admonishment, instead asking, "Did you or did you not bust Azimio's balls this morning? Like, for real?"
"He was being a jerk, and I figured," Kurt replied, fixing his eye make up a little, "that since I look like a girl, he couldn't hit me back for once."
Puck laughed and leaned on the sink next to Kurt, in a way that Kurt was sure Puck knew accentuated his shoulder muscles. "Yeah, well everyone's talking about the badass new chick schooling Az right in the middle of
the hallway. I think they like, expect us to get together now."
"Sounds like wishful thinking on your part," Kurt sighed, fixing his hair one last time before leaving the room, Puck close on his heels.
Just outside the door, Kurt almost ran into two Cheerios, but managed to lean back just in time to stop himself. It also meant leaning back into Puck, unfortunately. The girls both gave Puck suspicious looks and before Kurt could explain that it was nothing, Puck wrapped his arms around Kurt's waist and pulled him off to the side, saying, "Don't mind us, ladies." Kurt could hear the smirk in the boy's voice and wasn't pleased one bit.
"Oh, my god! Get off me," he hissed, pulling at Puck's arms ineffectually. "Let go!"
"Alright," Puck laughed, pulling away more slowly than Kurt would have liked. "Chill. I was just playin'."
"Remember what happened to Azimio when he tried to 'play me' this morning," Kurt whispered in warning, stalking away toward his next class and trying to forget the way Puck's arms felt around his waist.
~~**~~
When Mercedes met Kurt at the cafeteria line, she grinned that big grin she always wore when she had gossip to share.
"What?" Kurt asked carefully, unable to keep himself from smiling back, just a little.
"Rumor has it," Mercedes began, picking up a tray, "that you have a black belt in Kung Fu, you're the governor's daughter, and you're sleeping with Puck."
"What?" Kurt cried, realizing he'd spoke a little loudly and smiling at those students who looked over at him before returning to Mercedes with a moderated tone of voice. "The governor?"
"I thought you'd be more interested in the Puck rumor," Mercedes giggled, picking up a salad from the counter. "Unless..."
"No!" Kurt insisted, taking a salad for himself and selecting the only low-fat dressing available. "No. He's trying to get me to pretend to be his girlfriend to make Lauren jealous, but there's nothing going on there. I promise."
"And the rumor?" Mercedes grinned, letting the lunch lady give her some sort of mystery meat and mashed potatoes.
"Puck followed me into the bathroom. That's all there is to it," Kurt explained, avoiding the mystery meat in favor of a grilled chicken sandwich. It wasn't great, but since he hadn't packed his lunch it had to do.
"Uh-huh," Mercedes replied in disbelief as she headed for the cash register.
Shaking his head, which had the unfortunate side effect of getting a long hair stuck on his eyelashes until he blinked it away, Kurt followed his friend toward the glee club's usual table.
"Hey, everyone," Mercedes called as she approached, "this is Kurt's cousin Katrina. She goes here now."
"Hey, Kitty-Kat," Puck called from his end of the table, where he was sitting next to Artie and across from Sam.
"Bite me, Puckerman," Kurt replied sweetly before sitting down next to Mercedes. "And hello everyone else. I know Finn, obviously, and Rachel, but what do I call the rest of you?"
The gleeks introduced themselves one by one and Kurt only half paid attention once he realized most of what they were saying was untrue. "Really, Mike? You were raised for three years by a family of panda bears?"
"I swear," Mike nodded earnestly, looking to Artie for back up. "I didn't even learn how to speak human fluently until I was eleven."
Silence settled over the table as everyone waited for Kurt to give some indication whether or not he believed the story. The old Kurt would have pointed out that Mike's story seemed improbable at best, but what would Katrina Hummel, head badass in charge, say about Mike's story?
Kurt hummed like he was thinking about it, before saying, "Know any good bamboo recipes? My Uncle Burt is on a heart-healthy diet these days."
"Uh," Mike replied, his face going a little blank until Sam hit him on the arm, "no, sorry. I don't remember."
"Shame," Kurt replied, turning to Tina instead and saying, "I like your broach today, ..." He paused, leaving room for her to introduce herself.
"Tina," the girl replied with a slight smile. "And can I just say how fascinating I find it that you and Kurt look so much alike? You could be brother and sister."
Kurt wanted to say, "We could be the same person," but too many people already knew about his condition. Instead, Kurt shrugged and muttered something about, "Hummel family genes win out," before turning back to
his sandwich and letting the conversation continue as usual.
(Drawing By bulisen; Deviantart version.)
Part 3