Things, Stuff, & Whatnot
Life progresses. I am considering various 'What I Wanna Be When I Grow Up' strategies, but can't seem to find one to really concentrate on for any length of time. At the moment, being a rad hairstylist sounds good. If only for the amount of things I could do to my own hair. Hee.
Everything has been basically all right or good lately. Except yesterday, when I had an epic emotional breakdown. It was bad enough to scare me. I don't even want to imagine how Sam felt about it. I kept swinging from manic to depressed, with little to no warning signs. It was bad. B. A. D. Bad.
But that is over now, and I don't really want to dwell on it.
My con costuming is going swell for now. I'm going for Lovecraftian steampunk doctor/adventurer. It seems like a fun idea, don't you think? I'm even teaching myself to do copper and brass etching for the whole thing. I mean, everyone needs a sweet elder sign amulet, right? That is my opinion, at least.
That area of my life is good. I'm going back to crazy coloured hair this weekend, which is also good. I have read: The Etched City, Crimewave, L.A. Confidential, The Prestige, Slaughterhouse 5, Saving Fish From Drowning, and most of Perdido Street Station in the last month. That is better than good.
Not so good stuff? My breakdown yesterday, for one. The fact that someone else just told me that my group in the SCA (Clan Chaos Moon) is planning to go to Sir Eddy's, but no one apparently wanted to tell me. Maybe I'm not wanted? It doubly sucks, since that is the weekend of my birthday. Maybe nobody gives a shit? Honestly, that is what it feels like lately for the most part. I'm not aiming this at everyone, so please don't take it personally. There are people that I know have a genuine interest in seeing me and talking to me and knowing how I am doing in life. But I don't really get that feeling anymore from some of my oldest friends. Yeah, I know that everyone's lives are much more complicated in many ways than they used to be. But I've made the occasional gesture towards keeping in touch, which I haven't felt reciprocated. It just hurts a bit, y'know?
But I try not to think about that stuff. I have a lot of books to read. I have plans to make. I have a boyfriend to snuggle. I have another boy I don't feel that I snuggle nearly enough. I have girls to find fascinating from afar. I have bread to bake, hats to make, and epic meals to plan. I have Norwescon coming up. I have people to charge money to.
I'm doing okay.
Everything has been basically all right or good lately. Except yesterday, when I had an epic emotional breakdown. It was bad enough to scare me. I don't even want to imagine how Sam felt about it. I kept swinging from manic to depressed, with little to no warning signs. It was bad. B. A. D. Bad.
But that is over now, and I don't really want to dwell on it.
My con costuming is going swell for now. I'm going for Lovecraftian steampunk doctor/adventurer. It seems like a fun idea, don't you think? I'm even teaching myself to do copper and brass etching for the whole thing. I mean, everyone needs a sweet elder sign amulet, right? That is my opinion, at least.
That area of my life is good. I'm going back to crazy coloured hair this weekend, which is also good. I have read: The Etched City, Crimewave, L.A. Confidential, The Prestige, Slaughterhouse 5, Saving Fish From Drowning, and most of Perdido Street Station in the last month. That is better than good.
Not so good stuff? My breakdown yesterday, for one. The fact that someone else just told me that my group in the SCA (Clan Chaos Moon) is planning to go to Sir Eddy's, but no one apparently wanted to tell me. Maybe I'm not wanted? It doubly sucks, since that is the weekend of my birthday. Maybe nobody gives a shit? Honestly, that is what it feels like lately for the most part. I'm not aiming this at everyone, so please don't take it personally. There are people that I know have a genuine interest in seeing me and talking to me and knowing how I am doing in life. But I don't really get that feeling anymore from some of my oldest friends. Yeah, I know that everyone's lives are much more complicated in many ways than they used to be. But I've made the occasional gesture towards keeping in touch, which I haven't felt reciprocated. It just hurts a bit, y'know?
But I try not to think about that stuff. I have a lot of books to read. I have plans to make. I have a boyfriend to snuggle. I have another boy I don't feel that I snuggle nearly enough. I have girls to find fascinating from afar. I have bread to bake, hats to make, and epic meals to plan. I have Norwescon coming up. I have people to charge money to.
I'm doing okay.