[FIC][ZoroxSanji][M][WonderPenis][One Piece]
Title: WonderPenis
Rating: M
Word Count: 4410
Genre: Humour, romance, smut, PWP
Part: 1/1
Warnings: Slight spoilers, manlove (though if you're here, you're probably aware of that). Just some good ol' fashioned ZoSan smut, and you know what that means: it's not worksafe.
Timeline: Post-time skip. Wherever that takes us.
Pairing: ZoSan (…you know that means elephant in Japanese, right? XD)
Summary: Sanji takes an interesting detour.
Comment: Gather round for your bedtime story children.~
Sanji had giggled immaturely when he'd spotted the sparkly pink phallus in the not-so-discreet sex shop he'd 'accidentally' stumbled into. They were leaving in a few days, so he'd decided to see what this island had to offer in the way of more… 'specialised' goods. He'd looked around the shop with cautious eyes, checking to see if he'd been followed by a crew member or - god forbid - a pretty lady. But the shop had been empty save for the blond cook and a rather bored looking cashier. He was probably around Sanji's age, sat on a stall before a rainbow-beaded curtain leading to the storage room and thumbing through a magazine with a muscled man on the cover.
Slowly, he reached out for the display model and held it between his fingertips with a silly half smile. He handled it as if it were contaminated and turned it around in his hands until he got used to the cold plastic. Then his fingers brushed against what seemed to be a dial and a few buttons. He furrowed his brow, still giggling quietly, and pressed the button. When it began to buzz softly in his hands, he nearly dropped the thing and stared at it with wide eyes.
What. The. Fuck.
After having sailed half the Grand Line, Sanji was more than familiar with bizarre technology (and people), but this was a new one on him. It also threw up a lot of new possibilities, and despite being the gentleman he was, he couldn't quite bring himself to let this opportunity slip.
So, with utmost dignity, he switched it off and placed the display dildo back where it came from, picked up a packaged one in matching pink cardboard, and strode over to the cashier. Said cashier got up from his stall with his eyes still glued to what was probably some erotic picture. Sanji cleared his throat. The young man started slightly and put the magazine down, blushing with a cute grin. His brown hair was slightly ruffled and though not really Sanji's type, he was rather attractive.
The clerk's brown eyes locked onto what the cook had placed on the glass counter, and then he grinned a filthy grin. "Good choice," he said, "it comes in small, medium, large and extra large, if you're interested," he said, pointing to the 'L' symbol on the box with one hand and grabbing a black plastic bag with the other.
Sanji stifled a giggle and shook his head. "It's fine, thank you."
The boy shrugged. "Your choice. It comes with batteries, by the way," he said, and bagged everything up before ringing the till.
Sanji had paid him and all but ran out of the store, giggling madly to himself. Luckily, this island was pretty chilled out (Sanji suspected it had something to do with the lingering smell of marijuana), so no one gave him a funny look when he stepped into a market from a store with the sign 'D-I-R-T-Y' and a big rainbow awning over the shop front.
Later on that day, after Sanji had hidden the sparkly vibrator and cleared the table after dinner, Zoro had remained in the galley. The blond eyed him as he collected a pile of dirty dishes and dumped them in the sink.
"What?" He asked, turning the tap on.
"I saw you earlier," Zoro began quietly, his arms folded and leaning against the table, "in a weird part of town. What were you doing there?"
Sanji was quiet as he emptied pink washing up liquid from a bottle into the water. "How do you know it was a 'weird part of town'? You couldn't tell your arse from your elbow."
Zoro grumbled faintly at the remark, his one remaining green eye flickering to the floor. "You came out of a sex shop with a bag," he said, eye gradually travelling up to the blond. "Where is it?" He asked, giving him a half-glare.
Sanji ignored him and dropped the cutlery into the bottom of the bubbly sink of water. "I have no idea what you're talking about. Did you stumble into a drug den, by any chance? There were *more* enough of them." He drawled, thinking back to the amount of shady looking buildings with funny smells coming from them.
"No, I left that to you," Zoro shot back.
Sanji whirled around, indignant. "I resent that! I smoke nothing but the finest tobacco."
"Oh, sorry, I forgot. You prefer brothels these days, right?"
Sanji shook a dirty ladle at him. "You know that I am far too much of a gentlemen to-to go snooping around a place containing poor, desperate women like that. I-If anything, I was merely seeking to rescue them!"
Zoro spoke up again before the mental image killed him. "I'm sure," he said. "Now what did you buy from the sex store?" He asked again.
Sanji ignored him, returning to the dishes.
Zoro stared at his back for a few moments, before he stood, walking over to the blond to try another tactic. He slid his arms around the cook's lithe waist, pulling him close to his body and resting his chin on his shoulder. Sanji was unresponsive, so the swordsman continued. He nipped the cook's ear softly, kissing a line down his neck and rubbing his muscled lower abdomen through his shirt gently.
"If you tell me, I'll help you use it," he whispered, his deep voice rumbling in Sanji's ear, hot breath tickling his skin.
Sanji shivered gently, but resisted nonetheless. He squirmed away, turning around in Zoro's grip where the swordsman put his hands on the edge of the counter, trapping the cook. Sanji glared. "It wasn't even for you," he said.
Zoro's eyebrow pumped up. "Oh really? Well why do you need something to pleasure yourself with when I'm right here..?" He asked, leaning forward to lick the shell of a flushed ear.
Sanji shivered and ran his hands down the swordsman's biceps. "Arrogant bastard," he muttered.
"You love it," the green haired man replied as he returned his attention to nibbling the cook's neck.
Shivering, Sanji closed his eyes before he pulled Zoro away from him and kissed him deeply, running his wet fingers through short green spikes and plunging his tongue into the other man's mouth.
Zoro returned it with vigour, wrapping his arms tightly around the blond and stroking his back through his shirt.
After a couple of minutes, Sanji pulled away, looking the marimo in the eye. "Meet me in the Crow's Nest in fifteen minutes," he whispered.
Zoro flashed him a dirty grin as he walked out the kitchen, leaving the blond breathless against the counter. Sanji's lips twitched up in a small smile, and then he turned around to finish cleaning the dishes.
--
Fifteen minutes later and Sanji was climbing up to the Lookout with his black bag from the sex shop. He opened the hatch and looked around to see Zoro lifting a dumbbell, his eyes closed in concentration. Sanji rolled his eyes and climbed up into the round room.
"Christ, do you think of nothing but your body?" He asked.
Zoro opened his eye and placed the weights down, before he stood and walked over to the cook. "Yeah, I think about yours a whole lot," he replied, wrapping his arms around the cook and kissing him deeply.
Sanji rolled his eyes again and kissed him back, breaking away after a couple of seconds.
"I had no idea I was on your mind so often," he answered with a small smile, placing the black bag on the nearby bench.
"Shut up and strip," Zoro said, before he pulled his black vest over his head and threw it on the floor.
Sanji glared at him and kicked his shoes off to the side of the room, before turning his attention to his buttons and undoing them ever so slowly. He heard the stomps of Zoro's boots approaching him and he stopped unbuttoning them, instead pulling the garment over his head hastily. He didn't want a repeat of what happened the last time he made Zoro wait.
"See you've learnt your lesson, shit-cook," the swordsman whispered into his ear as he was suddenly all around him, his large hands stroking up his back, over his shoulder blades and down the dip of his spine. Shivers rocked the cook's body, and his hands found their way over the other man's muscled shoulders as he looked Zoro in the face.
"The only lesson I've learnt from you is that you're an idiot." He replied, tapping the other man on the nose with a long index finger patronisingly. He gasped as Zoro surprised him by taking the digit into his mouth, sucking on it slowly with his one remaining green eye flicking up to meet his.
Biting his lip, he pulled his finger away and used the hand to guide Zoro's lips to his. The swordsman pecked him on the lips and then pulled away, instead kissing a path along his jaw, down the tendon in his neck, licking a collarbone, and kissing down his muscled chest until he reached a nipple, taking it into his mouth and sucking on it hard.
"Ah!" Sanji gasped, fisting his hand into green hair as the bastard bit him. He continued to do this until the cook was trembling, goose bumps appearing all over his skin. They continued to kiss for several more minutes until Zoro decided to take the lead, stepping forwards to guide the cook towards the bench and pushing him back against it.
Sanji willingly spread his legs a little to accommodate the swordsman, tilting his head up and resting his neck against the soft, plush fabric so Zoro wasn't craning his neck to kiss him as he loomed over him. As Zoro plunged his tongue into his mouth, the blond's hands found their way down his toned, muscled back and into his loose-fitting training pants to slide over his ass, gripping the firm flesh with both hands and pulling him closer, rubbing his confined crotch against Sanji's own tightening one.
The marimo grunted and moved his hands from kneading the cook's hips to the button of his slacks. He fumbled slightly before practically tearing it open, followed by the zipper and then grabbing the waistband and yanking it down his legs, penguin-print boxer shorts and all. Sanji gasped quietly as their lips separated and he lifted his legs a little, twisting his ever more flexible body to kick them off the rest of the way. He wrapped himself around the other man once again, holding onto his shoulders as the swordsman's mouth attached itself to his neck, panting against it as he rubbed his crotch against the cook's.
Another minute of their intense lip lock was broken when Sanji reached down to his lover's training pants and rolled down the waistband, revealing Zoro's long, hard cock beneath, uncovered by underwear. Even in his aroused state, Sanji rolled his eyes before he used his feet to push them down the other man's muscled legs until Zoro kicked them off the rest of the way, kicking his boots off as well.
Sanji gasped when Zoro suddenly used his nudity to his advantage; he grabbed his and Sanji's dicks in one hand and squeezed, making them both simultaneously groan and shift slightly to get more friction. The swordsman smirked breathlessly down at the writhing cook as he began to stroke using his firm grip and used his other hand to hold onto the cook's hips.
"Agh, fuck!" He moaned as Zoro's pace increased, his hands fisting in the fabric of the bench and lifting his legs a little to hook them over the swordsman hips.
Zoro grinned and grunted quietly, moving his other hand away from caressing the cook's side to grab his leg, hitching it slightly as he often did when they were fucking. Not that he'd ever admit it, but he loved the feel of the strong muscles in the blond's legs rippling beneath his hands as his toes curled in pleasure.
Sanji was getting louder and louder, and as much as Zoro enjoyed watching the cocky idiot squirm and blush underneath him, he wanted to find out what was in the bag.
After a few minutes, Zoro pulled his hand away, winking as the cook glared up at him through his messy hair. He then reached beside him to the bag which had been dumped there about twenty minutes earlier, opened it and pushed the receipt to the side to draw out a pink box.
Zoro snorted.
"What?!" Sanji snapped.
"WonderPenis?" Zoro said through a filthy grin, "why the fuck would you call it WonderPenis?"
Sanji furrowed his brow. "I don't fucking know! Does it matter?" He asked.
"Not at all," the marimo replied happily, leaning down to kiss the other man deeply, the WonderPenis forgotten for a moment.
After a minute or so, Zoro pulled away and excitedly pulled the tape away from the cardboard like a kid on Christmas morning. He pulled up the cardboard flap and turned the box upside down until an instruction manual, the batteries the clerk had promised, and of course, the vibrator itself fell out onto the bench.
Zoro picked the dildo up and hastily inserted the batteries, not bothering to read the instructions- it was fairly obvious anyway. He fiddled about with the buttons for a few minutes and then let out a short laugh as it started to buzz.
"This thing is pretty awesome," he commented, "I wonder what else you could use it for."
Sanji glared at him, hard. "Would you like me to make a list?" He snapped.
Zoro chuckled and flicked his eyes down at him. "Maybe later. I think I'd like to shove it up your ass, first," he added lewdly with a wink.
"Please do," Sanji replied.
Zoro turned it off and leant down to kiss him again, but he pulled away after only a few seconds. He looked over his shoulder for a minute before looking for their pants, and then he manoeuvred himself a little so he could grab the cook's pants and rummage around in his pocket for a moment before he drew out the small bottle of cooking oil. The cook was well-trained, it seemed, even after their two year separation.
He tossed the garment back over to the floor and emptied a small amount onto his palm. The scent of the fluid flared up memories of sweaty nights in the galley when they were out at sea, and he knew that the scent would probably remind him of it for the rest of his life. He smiled and then brought his hand down, rubbing it over the increasingly-annoyed cook's asshole. He ever so slowly slipped a finger in- though at this point, he really didn't need it; they had been apart for a few years but it didn't take long for them to settle back into their routine of fucking like rabbits.
Sanji's back arched a little at the intrusion but he glared up the swordsman from his position, reminding him of this fact. But Zoro ignored him, instead slowly inserting another finger, and then another, scissoring his fingers inside the pliable, but still tight, passage.
"Nh- argh, fuck! Enough already, asshole!" Sanji snapped.
Zoro chuckled. "Alright, don't hurt yourself," he replied, looking at him with a teasing glint in his eye as he picked up the vibrator and coated it with the oil. He then took it and positioned the slightly tapered tip against the cook's entrance.
Sanji hissed as the cold plastic pressed against his ass and he closed his eyes, leaning his head back as Zoro pushed it until it was halfway in. With a moan, the blond reached forward and gripped the swordsman's large bicep, spreading his legs a little wider subconsciously. With a smirk, Zoro pushed it in the rest of the way, delighting in the little gasps and quiet moans the cook released.
When it was fully sheathed, he leant forward again, moving his head down until he could kiss the other man deeply, his nose mashing against his face as they kissed passionately, tongues tangling and shallow breaths peppering the tiny space between them. After a few minutes the swordsman pulled away and pushed a button on the vibrator.
Sanji's long, loud moan made Zoro grin wide, the blush on the cook's face spreading further down his body as he shivered. The blond groaned and gripped the fabric of the couch again, fisting his hands in it until his knuckles went white as the vibrator rubbed against the sensitive nerve endings deep inside him.
The swordsman's hand twisted slightly as he began thrusting the vibrator inside his lover slowly, the vibrations from the toy sending shockwaves through the cook's lithe body. It was a wonder how the others couldn't hear them- though it was probably due to the fact that it was now dusk and they were probably preparing themselves for bed. But nonetheless the cook's moans and groans began to grow in volume.
Zoro dipped his head down again to kiss the other man as he twisted the dial and increased the vibration to the medium setting. The blond's pants increased in frequency for a moment before it turned into full-out moaning and whimpering into the lip lock, his eyes rolling back a little as the marimo's tongue plunged into his mouth. Zoro trailed his mouth down the cook's neck, leaving a dark love bite there before he kissed down his chest and laved his tongue over his nipple, sucking it into his mouth and nibbling it a little. With a gasp, Sanji responded by fisting his hand in the slightly longer spikes of hair and arching his back, thrusting his hips forward and brushing his cock against his lover's.
Zoro grunts lowly and flicks his dark green eyes up at the other man from beneath his brow, moving his body a little from his half slumped position. He sits up and leans with one hand on the back of the couch, kissing the cook's fingers as they slide from his hair to cup his face. He turned the dial up again, now on its maximum setting as he began to thrust the toy in and out of the blond's body. Furrowing his brow and biting his lip in concentration, Zoro aimed to thrust the thing at the memorised angle.
It took everything in him not to come when the cook squealed beneath him, his legs jerking and wrapping themselves around his waist when he found the sensitive bundle of nerves deep inside of him. He actually moaned with his lover, his cock now against his chest. This won't last long, he thought, beginning to thrust the toy in and out and drawing the moans out of the suddenly silent, rather embarrassed cook.
Sanji bit his lip and squeezed his eyes shut, humiliated at letting out such a noise. He began to buck his hips up and let out two breathy, deeper moans as the vibrations pressed against his most sensitive place. "Fuck," he breathed, his cock weeping precum at the tip, smearing it slightly against his muscled, coiling abdomen. He looked past his own shuddering body to the swordsman's neglected length, and he suddenly grabbed it with the hand that had been stroking the other's muscled neck.
Zoro yelped, and Sanji grinned devilishly up at him through his shallow breaths. With a sigh, the swordsman turned off the vibrator and pulled it out, leaving it on top of the instruction manual before pulling away from the blond, forcing him to let go of his cock.
For a moment, Sanji was terrified that Zoro had lost interest in what they were doing and was going to leave him there, hard and horny. But instead, the other man sat next to him on the couch with his legs slightly spread. Sanji smiled wide as he realised what he meant when he turned to wink at him, and he moved so he was straddling the other man. Shifting his weight onto his shins, he looked over his shoulder to see Zoro guiding his cock to his already slick entrance.
The two men groaned as the blond sunk down, the hardness sliding into the cook's ass ever so slowly. When he was fully seated in the swordsman's lap, Sanji leaned forward and kissed the other man hard, moaning softly as Zoro's hands gripped his hips like a vice. He rocked his pelvis against him softly in response, feeling coarse dark hair against the curve of his ass. This was one of the cook's favourite positions, as it allowed him to feel Zoro's cock deeper than ever. Zoro's eyes were screwed shut as he kissed back, lost in the sensation of the cook's tight, hot heat around his dick.
After a few minutes of kissing, Sanji pulled away breathlessly, and, swearing, began to ride his swordsman hard, already desperate from the other man's earlier teasing. Zoro grunted and leaned his head back against the wall, biting his lip as more, shorter grunts and pants fell from his mouth.
Sanji braced himself on the other's muscled shoulders as he slowed a little, allowing them slower, deeper thrusts deep inside. Shifting a bit, the cook changed his angle and then began to moan loudly, his noise slowly climbing in volume as the angle allowed Zoro's cock to hit his prostate dead on.
"Argh!" Zoro moaned, his face pinched in pleasure as he held onto his lover's hips, pushing him down hard on his cock. The two of them moved together; Sanji thrusting back as Zoro bucked his hips up to meet his. Their movements started to quicken, and Zoro distantly wondered how he had gone two years without this, without the foul-mouthed, cocky, endlessly irritating and infuriatingly sexy love-cook. Sanji just wondered how he thought a vibrator could rival this.
Their thrusts gained in pace, the two of them slamming their hips together, Sanji moaning almost continuously with grunted and gasped curses falling from his lips, Zoro's hands gripping his ass hard and deep grunts escaping his throat.
They knew that they were too far gone to last, and Zoro grabbed the back of the blond's head, his calloused fingers threading through the blond locks to bring their lips together. His other hand travelled between their sweat-slicked bodies to grip the blond's cock and he fisted it roughly, still bucking his hips up to meet Sanji's now desperate lunges towards his pelvis.
With a long string of curses, the cook moaning continuously as he quickly, frantically thrust towards the swordsman, torn between his cock and his hand. But it didn't matter, as he was coming within seconds, spilling over Zoro's tanned, sweat-slicked skin. Zoro bit his shoulder hard as he came and fisted his cock through his orgasm. He felt his own approaching as the cook tightened around him like a vice, the fizzing sensation in his belly spreading outwards and washing through his body as he released into the other man.
"Argh, fuck!" He groaned loudly as he bucked his hips hard the last few times, the cook's tired body slumped against him.
Sanji groaned softly as he felt the other man's orgasm fill him, and he stroked the swordsman's shoulder as it subsided. They lay there for several minutes, panting, before Sanji pulled his face from where he had pressed it into Zoro's neck midway through his orgasm, and looked into the peaceful face of his lover.
Zoro's one remaining eye was shut as his breathing levelled, though he still breathed through his mouth. When he felt Sanji's gaze on him, he opened his eye and they kissed- the closest thing to a thank-you that either of them were ever going to get. Zoro stroked down Sanji's back in an unusual display of affection, but the cook didn't mind. He wrapped his arms around the others neck and smiled at him when he pulled away. "The vibrator was better." He said with a naughty smile.
"Oh-ho-ho!" Zoro said with a wide grin, "I suppose you won't be needing me anymore, then?" He asked.
"I suppose I can make do." Sanji replied, looking at his nails.
Zoro spanked him.
Sanji yelped.
"Revenge." Zoro said, grinning wide. Sanji kicked him in the shin.
~OMAKE~
Not long after they had finished and cleared away the vibrator before leaving within a few minutes of one another, Luffy would climb the ladder to the Crow's Nest for the first watch of the evening (it was the only one he could stay awake and out of trouble long enough for).
Mysteriously, the windows were steamed up and as he padded over, barefoot, to the bench where cook and swordsman had been not long before, he bent down onto the floor and picked up a small placard that read "D-I-R-T-Y Sex Shop - Where Your Fantasies Come True!"
Luffy scratched his head. "Where did this come from~?" He wondered, before glancing around the Crow's Nest and tucking it into his pocket with a filthy grin.
---
So, something of an apology fic for the lack of Salrynn's Shrine. I found like a quarter of this on my computer and decided to finish it. :D
I'm really sorry I'm so slow - I promised myself to have the next chapter up by Easter (which is like… now), but its proving to be a bitch to write. As well as this, I am extremely busy with coursework and I am moving to the other side of England this Summer (which, judging by the heat of the Summer so far, is not something I'm looking forward to, despite the much better location). So once again, I won't have much time to write between packing, coursework, moving, house-hunting, etc. You'll just have to find something else to read for now, I'm afraid D:
Rating: M
Word Count: 4410
Genre: Humour, romance, smut, PWP
Part: 1/1
Warnings: Slight spoilers, manlove (though if you're here, you're probably aware of that). Just some good ol' fashioned ZoSan smut, and you know what that means: it's not worksafe.
Timeline: Post-time skip. Wherever that takes us.
Pairing: ZoSan (…you know that means elephant in Japanese, right? XD)
Summary: Sanji takes an interesting detour.
Comment: Gather round for your bedtime story children.~
Sanji had giggled immaturely when he'd spotted the sparkly pink phallus in the not-so-discreet sex shop he'd 'accidentally' stumbled into. They were leaving in a few days, so he'd decided to see what this island had to offer in the way of more… 'specialised' goods. He'd looked around the shop with cautious eyes, checking to see if he'd been followed by a crew member or - god forbid - a pretty lady. But the shop had been empty save for the blond cook and a rather bored looking cashier. He was probably around Sanji's age, sat on a stall before a rainbow-beaded curtain leading to the storage room and thumbing through a magazine with a muscled man on the cover.
Slowly, he reached out for the display model and held it between his fingertips with a silly half smile. He handled it as if it were contaminated and turned it around in his hands until he got used to the cold plastic. Then his fingers brushed against what seemed to be a dial and a few buttons. He furrowed his brow, still giggling quietly, and pressed the button. When it began to buzz softly in his hands, he nearly dropped the thing and stared at it with wide eyes.
What. The. Fuck.
After having sailed half the Grand Line, Sanji was more than familiar with bizarre technology (and people), but this was a new one on him. It also threw up a lot of new possibilities, and despite being the gentleman he was, he couldn't quite bring himself to let this opportunity slip.
So, with utmost dignity, he switched it off and placed the display dildo back where it came from, picked up a packaged one in matching pink cardboard, and strode over to the cashier. Said cashier got up from his stall with his eyes still glued to what was probably some erotic picture. Sanji cleared his throat. The young man started slightly and put the magazine down, blushing with a cute grin. His brown hair was slightly ruffled and though not really Sanji's type, he was rather attractive.
The clerk's brown eyes locked onto what the cook had placed on the glass counter, and then he grinned a filthy grin. "Good choice," he said, "it comes in small, medium, large and extra large, if you're interested," he said, pointing to the 'L' symbol on the box with one hand and grabbing a black plastic bag with the other.
Sanji stifled a giggle and shook his head. "It's fine, thank you."
The boy shrugged. "Your choice. It comes with batteries, by the way," he said, and bagged everything up before ringing the till.
Sanji had paid him and all but ran out of the store, giggling madly to himself. Luckily, this island was pretty chilled out (Sanji suspected it had something to do with the lingering smell of marijuana), so no one gave him a funny look when he stepped into a market from a store with the sign 'D-I-R-T-Y' and a big rainbow awning over the shop front.
Later on that day, after Sanji had hidden the sparkly vibrator and cleared the table after dinner, Zoro had remained in the galley. The blond eyed him as he collected a pile of dirty dishes and dumped them in the sink.
"What?" He asked, turning the tap on.
"I saw you earlier," Zoro began quietly, his arms folded and leaning against the table, "in a weird part of town. What were you doing there?"
Sanji was quiet as he emptied pink washing up liquid from a bottle into the water. "How do you know it was a 'weird part of town'? You couldn't tell your arse from your elbow."
Zoro grumbled faintly at the remark, his one remaining green eye flickering to the floor. "You came out of a sex shop with a bag," he said, eye gradually travelling up to the blond. "Where is it?" He asked, giving him a half-glare.
Sanji ignored him and dropped the cutlery into the bottom of the bubbly sink of water. "I have no idea what you're talking about. Did you stumble into a drug den, by any chance? There were *more* enough of them." He drawled, thinking back to the amount of shady looking buildings with funny smells coming from them.
"No, I left that to you," Zoro shot back.
Sanji whirled around, indignant. "I resent that! I smoke nothing but the finest tobacco."
"Oh, sorry, I forgot. You prefer brothels these days, right?"
Sanji shook a dirty ladle at him. "You know that I am far too much of a gentlemen to-to go snooping around a place containing poor, desperate women like that. I-If anything, I was merely seeking to rescue them!"
Zoro spoke up again before the mental image killed him. "I'm sure," he said. "Now what did you buy from the sex store?" He asked again.
Sanji ignored him, returning to the dishes.
Zoro stared at his back for a few moments, before he stood, walking over to the blond to try another tactic. He slid his arms around the cook's lithe waist, pulling him close to his body and resting his chin on his shoulder. Sanji was unresponsive, so the swordsman continued. He nipped the cook's ear softly, kissing a line down his neck and rubbing his muscled lower abdomen through his shirt gently.
"If you tell me, I'll help you use it," he whispered, his deep voice rumbling in Sanji's ear, hot breath tickling his skin.
Sanji shivered gently, but resisted nonetheless. He squirmed away, turning around in Zoro's grip where the swordsman put his hands on the edge of the counter, trapping the cook. Sanji glared. "It wasn't even for you," he said.
Zoro's eyebrow pumped up. "Oh really? Well why do you need something to pleasure yourself with when I'm right here..?" He asked, leaning forward to lick the shell of a flushed ear.
Sanji shivered and ran his hands down the swordsman's biceps. "Arrogant bastard," he muttered.
"You love it," the green haired man replied as he returned his attention to nibbling the cook's neck.
Shivering, Sanji closed his eyes before he pulled Zoro away from him and kissed him deeply, running his wet fingers through short green spikes and plunging his tongue into the other man's mouth.
Zoro returned it with vigour, wrapping his arms tightly around the blond and stroking his back through his shirt.
After a couple of minutes, Sanji pulled away, looking the marimo in the eye. "Meet me in the Crow's Nest in fifteen minutes," he whispered.
Zoro flashed him a dirty grin as he walked out the kitchen, leaving the blond breathless against the counter. Sanji's lips twitched up in a small smile, and then he turned around to finish cleaning the dishes.
--
Fifteen minutes later and Sanji was climbing up to the Lookout with his black bag from the sex shop. He opened the hatch and looked around to see Zoro lifting a dumbbell, his eyes closed in concentration. Sanji rolled his eyes and climbed up into the round room.
"Christ, do you think of nothing but your body?" He asked.
Zoro opened his eye and placed the weights down, before he stood and walked over to the cook. "Yeah, I think about yours a whole lot," he replied, wrapping his arms around the cook and kissing him deeply.
Sanji rolled his eyes again and kissed him back, breaking away after a couple of seconds.
"I had no idea I was on your mind so often," he answered with a small smile, placing the black bag on the nearby bench.
"Shut up and strip," Zoro said, before he pulled his black vest over his head and threw it on the floor.
Sanji glared at him and kicked his shoes off to the side of the room, before turning his attention to his buttons and undoing them ever so slowly. He heard the stomps of Zoro's boots approaching him and he stopped unbuttoning them, instead pulling the garment over his head hastily. He didn't want a repeat of what happened the last time he made Zoro wait.
"See you've learnt your lesson, shit-cook," the swordsman whispered into his ear as he was suddenly all around him, his large hands stroking up his back, over his shoulder blades and down the dip of his spine. Shivers rocked the cook's body, and his hands found their way over the other man's muscled shoulders as he looked Zoro in the face.
"The only lesson I've learnt from you is that you're an idiot." He replied, tapping the other man on the nose with a long index finger patronisingly. He gasped as Zoro surprised him by taking the digit into his mouth, sucking on it slowly with his one remaining green eye flicking up to meet his.
Biting his lip, he pulled his finger away and used the hand to guide Zoro's lips to his. The swordsman pecked him on the lips and then pulled away, instead kissing a path along his jaw, down the tendon in his neck, licking a collarbone, and kissing down his muscled chest until he reached a nipple, taking it into his mouth and sucking on it hard.
"Ah!" Sanji gasped, fisting his hand into green hair as the bastard bit him. He continued to do this until the cook was trembling, goose bumps appearing all over his skin. They continued to kiss for several more minutes until Zoro decided to take the lead, stepping forwards to guide the cook towards the bench and pushing him back against it.
Sanji willingly spread his legs a little to accommodate the swordsman, tilting his head up and resting his neck against the soft, plush fabric so Zoro wasn't craning his neck to kiss him as he loomed over him. As Zoro plunged his tongue into his mouth, the blond's hands found their way down his toned, muscled back and into his loose-fitting training pants to slide over his ass, gripping the firm flesh with both hands and pulling him closer, rubbing his confined crotch against Sanji's own tightening one.
The marimo grunted and moved his hands from kneading the cook's hips to the button of his slacks. He fumbled slightly before practically tearing it open, followed by the zipper and then grabbing the waistband and yanking it down his legs, penguin-print boxer shorts and all. Sanji gasped quietly as their lips separated and he lifted his legs a little, twisting his ever more flexible body to kick them off the rest of the way. He wrapped himself around the other man once again, holding onto his shoulders as the swordsman's mouth attached itself to his neck, panting against it as he rubbed his crotch against the cook's.
Another minute of their intense lip lock was broken when Sanji reached down to his lover's training pants and rolled down the waistband, revealing Zoro's long, hard cock beneath, uncovered by underwear. Even in his aroused state, Sanji rolled his eyes before he used his feet to push them down the other man's muscled legs until Zoro kicked them off the rest of the way, kicking his boots off as well.
Sanji gasped when Zoro suddenly used his nudity to his advantage; he grabbed his and Sanji's dicks in one hand and squeezed, making them both simultaneously groan and shift slightly to get more friction. The swordsman smirked breathlessly down at the writhing cook as he began to stroke using his firm grip and used his other hand to hold onto the cook's hips.
"Agh, fuck!" He moaned as Zoro's pace increased, his hands fisting in the fabric of the bench and lifting his legs a little to hook them over the swordsman hips.
Zoro grinned and grunted quietly, moving his other hand away from caressing the cook's side to grab his leg, hitching it slightly as he often did when they were fucking. Not that he'd ever admit it, but he loved the feel of the strong muscles in the blond's legs rippling beneath his hands as his toes curled in pleasure.
Sanji was getting louder and louder, and as much as Zoro enjoyed watching the cocky idiot squirm and blush underneath him, he wanted to find out what was in the bag.
After a few minutes, Zoro pulled his hand away, winking as the cook glared up at him through his messy hair. He then reached beside him to the bag which had been dumped there about twenty minutes earlier, opened it and pushed the receipt to the side to draw out a pink box.
Zoro snorted.
"What?!" Sanji snapped.
"WonderPenis?" Zoro said through a filthy grin, "why the fuck would you call it WonderPenis?"
Sanji furrowed his brow. "I don't fucking know! Does it matter?" He asked.
"Not at all," the marimo replied happily, leaning down to kiss the other man deeply, the WonderPenis forgotten for a moment.
After a minute or so, Zoro pulled away and excitedly pulled the tape away from the cardboard like a kid on Christmas morning. He pulled up the cardboard flap and turned the box upside down until an instruction manual, the batteries the clerk had promised, and of course, the vibrator itself fell out onto the bench.
Zoro picked the dildo up and hastily inserted the batteries, not bothering to read the instructions- it was fairly obvious anyway. He fiddled about with the buttons for a few minutes and then let out a short laugh as it started to buzz.
"This thing is pretty awesome," he commented, "I wonder what else you could use it for."
Sanji glared at him, hard. "Would you like me to make a list?" He snapped.
Zoro chuckled and flicked his eyes down at him. "Maybe later. I think I'd like to shove it up your ass, first," he added lewdly with a wink.
"Please do," Sanji replied.
Zoro turned it off and leant down to kiss him again, but he pulled away after only a few seconds. He looked over his shoulder for a minute before looking for their pants, and then he manoeuvred himself a little so he could grab the cook's pants and rummage around in his pocket for a moment before he drew out the small bottle of cooking oil. The cook was well-trained, it seemed, even after their two year separation.
He tossed the garment back over to the floor and emptied a small amount onto his palm. The scent of the fluid flared up memories of sweaty nights in the galley when they were out at sea, and he knew that the scent would probably remind him of it for the rest of his life. He smiled and then brought his hand down, rubbing it over the increasingly-annoyed cook's asshole. He ever so slowly slipped a finger in- though at this point, he really didn't need it; they had been apart for a few years but it didn't take long for them to settle back into their routine of fucking like rabbits.
Sanji's back arched a little at the intrusion but he glared up the swordsman from his position, reminding him of this fact. But Zoro ignored him, instead slowly inserting another finger, and then another, scissoring his fingers inside the pliable, but still tight, passage.
"Nh- argh, fuck! Enough already, asshole!" Sanji snapped.
Zoro chuckled. "Alright, don't hurt yourself," he replied, looking at him with a teasing glint in his eye as he picked up the vibrator and coated it with the oil. He then took it and positioned the slightly tapered tip against the cook's entrance.
Sanji hissed as the cold plastic pressed against his ass and he closed his eyes, leaning his head back as Zoro pushed it until it was halfway in. With a moan, the blond reached forward and gripped the swordsman's large bicep, spreading his legs a little wider subconsciously. With a smirk, Zoro pushed it in the rest of the way, delighting in the little gasps and quiet moans the cook released.
When it was fully sheathed, he leant forward again, moving his head down until he could kiss the other man deeply, his nose mashing against his face as they kissed passionately, tongues tangling and shallow breaths peppering the tiny space between them. After a few minutes the swordsman pulled away and pushed a button on the vibrator.
Sanji's long, loud moan made Zoro grin wide, the blush on the cook's face spreading further down his body as he shivered. The blond groaned and gripped the fabric of the couch again, fisting his hands in it until his knuckles went white as the vibrator rubbed against the sensitive nerve endings deep inside him.
The swordsman's hand twisted slightly as he began thrusting the vibrator inside his lover slowly, the vibrations from the toy sending shockwaves through the cook's lithe body. It was a wonder how the others couldn't hear them- though it was probably due to the fact that it was now dusk and they were probably preparing themselves for bed. But nonetheless the cook's moans and groans began to grow in volume.
Zoro dipped his head down again to kiss the other man as he twisted the dial and increased the vibration to the medium setting. The blond's pants increased in frequency for a moment before it turned into full-out moaning and whimpering into the lip lock, his eyes rolling back a little as the marimo's tongue plunged into his mouth. Zoro trailed his mouth down the cook's neck, leaving a dark love bite there before he kissed down his chest and laved his tongue over his nipple, sucking it into his mouth and nibbling it a little. With a gasp, Sanji responded by fisting his hand in the slightly longer spikes of hair and arching his back, thrusting his hips forward and brushing his cock against his lover's.
Zoro grunts lowly and flicks his dark green eyes up at the other man from beneath his brow, moving his body a little from his half slumped position. He sits up and leans with one hand on the back of the couch, kissing the cook's fingers as they slide from his hair to cup his face. He turned the dial up again, now on its maximum setting as he began to thrust the toy in and out of the blond's body. Furrowing his brow and biting his lip in concentration, Zoro aimed to thrust the thing at the memorised angle.
It took everything in him not to come when the cook squealed beneath him, his legs jerking and wrapping themselves around his waist when he found the sensitive bundle of nerves deep inside of him. He actually moaned with his lover, his cock now against his chest. This won't last long, he thought, beginning to thrust the toy in and out and drawing the moans out of the suddenly silent, rather embarrassed cook.
Sanji bit his lip and squeezed his eyes shut, humiliated at letting out such a noise. He began to buck his hips up and let out two breathy, deeper moans as the vibrations pressed against his most sensitive place. "Fuck," he breathed, his cock weeping precum at the tip, smearing it slightly against his muscled, coiling abdomen. He looked past his own shuddering body to the swordsman's neglected length, and he suddenly grabbed it with the hand that had been stroking the other's muscled neck.
Zoro yelped, and Sanji grinned devilishly up at him through his shallow breaths. With a sigh, the swordsman turned off the vibrator and pulled it out, leaving it on top of the instruction manual before pulling away from the blond, forcing him to let go of his cock.
For a moment, Sanji was terrified that Zoro had lost interest in what they were doing and was going to leave him there, hard and horny. But instead, the other man sat next to him on the couch with his legs slightly spread. Sanji smiled wide as he realised what he meant when he turned to wink at him, and he moved so he was straddling the other man. Shifting his weight onto his shins, he looked over his shoulder to see Zoro guiding his cock to his already slick entrance.
The two men groaned as the blond sunk down, the hardness sliding into the cook's ass ever so slowly. When he was fully seated in the swordsman's lap, Sanji leaned forward and kissed the other man hard, moaning softly as Zoro's hands gripped his hips like a vice. He rocked his pelvis against him softly in response, feeling coarse dark hair against the curve of his ass. This was one of the cook's favourite positions, as it allowed him to feel Zoro's cock deeper than ever. Zoro's eyes were screwed shut as he kissed back, lost in the sensation of the cook's tight, hot heat around his dick.
After a few minutes of kissing, Sanji pulled away breathlessly, and, swearing, began to ride his swordsman hard, already desperate from the other man's earlier teasing. Zoro grunted and leaned his head back against the wall, biting his lip as more, shorter grunts and pants fell from his mouth.
Sanji braced himself on the other's muscled shoulders as he slowed a little, allowing them slower, deeper thrusts deep inside. Shifting a bit, the cook changed his angle and then began to moan loudly, his noise slowly climbing in volume as the angle allowed Zoro's cock to hit his prostate dead on.
"Argh!" Zoro moaned, his face pinched in pleasure as he held onto his lover's hips, pushing him down hard on his cock. The two of them moved together; Sanji thrusting back as Zoro bucked his hips up to meet his. Their movements started to quicken, and Zoro distantly wondered how he had gone two years without this, without the foul-mouthed, cocky, endlessly irritating and infuriatingly sexy love-cook. Sanji just wondered how he thought a vibrator could rival this.
Their thrusts gained in pace, the two of them slamming their hips together, Sanji moaning almost continuously with grunted and gasped curses falling from his lips, Zoro's hands gripping his ass hard and deep grunts escaping his throat.
They knew that they were too far gone to last, and Zoro grabbed the back of the blond's head, his calloused fingers threading through the blond locks to bring their lips together. His other hand travelled between their sweat-slicked bodies to grip the blond's cock and he fisted it roughly, still bucking his hips up to meet Sanji's now desperate lunges towards his pelvis.
With a long string of curses, the cook moaning continuously as he quickly, frantically thrust towards the swordsman, torn between his cock and his hand. But it didn't matter, as he was coming within seconds, spilling over Zoro's tanned, sweat-slicked skin. Zoro bit his shoulder hard as he came and fisted his cock through his orgasm. He felt his own approaching as the cook tightened around him like a vice, the fizzing sensation in his belly spreading outwards and washing through his body as he released into the other man.
"Argh, fuck!" He groaned loudly as he bucked his hips hard the last few times, the cook's tired body slumped against him.
Sanji groaned softly as he felt the other man's orgasm fill him, and he stroked the swordsman's shoulder as it subsided. They lay there for several minutes, panting, before Sanji pulled his face from where he had pressed it into Zoro's neck midway through his orgasm, and looked into the peaceful face of his lover.
Zoro's one remaining eye was shut as his breathing levelled, though he still breathed through his mouth. When he felt Sanji's gaze on him, he opened his eye and they kissed- the closest thing to a thank-you that either of them were ever going to get. Zoro stroked down Sanji's back in an unusual display of affection, but the cook didn't mind. He wrapped his arms around the others neck and smiled at him when he pulled away. "The vibrator was better." He said with a naughty smile.
"Oh-ho-ho!" Zoro said with a wide grin, "I suppose you won't be needing me anymore, then?" He asked.
"I suppose I can make do." Sanji replied, looking at his nails.
Zoro spanked him.
Sanji yelped.
"Revenge." Zoro said, grinning wide. Sanji kicked him in the shin.
~OMAKE~
Not long after they had finished and cleared away the vibrator before leaving within a few minutes of one another, Luffy would climb the ladder to the Crow's Nest for the first watch of the evening (it was the only one he could stay awake and out of trouble long enough for).
Mysteriously, the windows were steamed up and as he padded over, barefoot, to the bench where cook and swordsman had been not long before, he bent down onto the floor and picked up a small placard that read "D-I-R-T-Y Sex Shop - Where Your Fantasies Come True!"
Luffy scratched his head. "Where did this come from~?" He wondered, before glancing around the Crow's Nest and tucking it into his pocket with a filthy grin.
---
So, something of an apology fic for the lack of Salrynn's Shrine. I found like a quarter of this on my computer and decided to finish it. :D
I'm really sorry I'm so slow - I promised myself to have the next chapter up by Easter (which is like… now), but its proving to be a bitch to write. As well as this, I am extremely busy with coursework and I am moving to the other side of England this Summer (which, judging by the heat of the Summer so far, is not something I'm looking forward to, despite the much better location). So once again, I won't have much time to write between packing, coursework, moving, house-hunting, etc. You'll just have to find something else to read for now, I'm afraid D: