Is communication always best?
I told Anna, sort of unintentionally, that I have a private blog. I wanted to share with her some of the insights I have gotten from all of you who have been so helpful, and kind of had to tell where the info came from... And she is a bit upset that I dont want her to read it.
I really do believe that communication is important in any relationship, ours especially, but I am also afraid that there is such a thing as too much communication. Anna has SO MUCH to deal with on a day to day basis without worrying whether I am feeling awkward or depressed. She is so much like me in that she is patently unable to put her own needs first. I am TERRIFIED that letting her read this would make her feel guilty for being who she is and causing me pain. Add to that the fact that I am probably more likely to blog when I am upset than to blog when I am happy... I really dont know what the right thing to do is.
I have to laugh at myself when I realize that I honestly did not think Anna would care whether I had a private blog or not. That just proves to me even more that I am dating a girl! My ex would not have cared... When I turn the situation around I know I would feel the same way, but I am still worried about hurting her.
I am also worried that I will start to censor my words if I know she will see them, and thats the last thing I want. The whole purpose of this blog was to get away from everyone I knew so I could truly say what I wanted to. I told Anna that I wished I hadnt said anything to her about it, but she says that would have been even worse. What should I do? Do you think total communication is best even if it causes her pain?
I am at a loss...
I really do believe that communication is important in any relationship, ours especially, but I am also afraid that there is such a thing as too much communication. Anna has SO MUCH to deal with on a day to day basis without worrying whether I am feeling awkward or depressed. She is so much like me in that she is patently unable to put her own needs first. I am TERRIFIED that letting her read this would make her feel guilty for being who she is and causing me pain. Add to that the fact that I am probably more likely to blog when I am upset than to blog when I am happy... I really dont know what the right thing to do is.
I have to laugh at myself when I realize that I honestly did not think Anna would care whether I had a private blog or not. That just proves to me even more that I am dating a girl! My ex would not have cared... When I turn the situation around I know I would feel the same way, but I am still worried about hurting her.
I am also worried that I will start to censor my words if I know she will see them, and thats the last thing I want. The whole purpose of this blog was to get away from everyone I knew so I could truly say what I wanted to. I told Anna that I wished I hadnt said anything to her about it, but she says that would have been even worse. What should I do? Do you think total communication is best even if it causes her pain?
I am at a loss...