Disinfectant Poisonings Rise

[profrobert]

After Trump said people should ingest disinfectants to combat the coronavirus, there has been a 121% increase in poisonings from the ingestion of disinfectants.  Trump called the reports "fake news" and insisted that putting cleaning agents into the body was safe.  "I know it's highly safe," Trump said.  "Look at Melania.  She had the bleach for

Comments

[nonelvis]

The second sentence felt completely legit, but the rest of it clearly was not. That said, I'm concerned at how well you write Trump's voice, and if you've been busy writing Trump/Pence RPF on AO3, I never, ever want to know about it.

[profrobert]

Trump pushed the white checker to the last row. "King me," he said. It had been difficult finding a set of white and pink checkers -- the pink ones were nearly all off the board now -- but he'd put Barr on it, and Barr would do anything for him. Barr was good that way.

The Vice President put another white checker on top of the first. He removed the ball gag from his mouth. "I wish we could play chess, so then I could queen you," he said.

"No, I won't, and you know why," Trump replied. "I heard the chess is a game for Democrats. Hannity said Wacky Nancy Pelosi is playing a 3-D version of the chess. I won't do the chess."

"Mmmmph emmph mmmmph," the Vice President said. He had replaced the ball gag. It comforted him.

"Yes, Mike, I will, and bigly, too."

[nonelvis]

I hate you. I mean, you're an absolute fucking genius, but I hate you.