"Can I Sail Through The Changes Oceans Have? Can I Handle The Seasons Of My Life?"
There is this daunting feeling that I'm making all of this up. When I think I am happy I will sit down and want to cry. Its all so familiar and played out. I could swear I was happy. I've tried and tried with no results and now I'm back to this town, this mood.
I've been faking it that I don't care. Best friends for 9 years, its impossible not to care. For me atleast. I know you're okay as he kisses away the you that was mine. I miss having you there when it was needed even though you're not needed much these days. I still have to see the absence of you everyday when we don't look at eachother. I have to hear the fake hellos when we're driving to school. I'm witinessing it all fading out and you nor I is trying to stop it. Lets just wave it goodbye and give a pretty little smile, gloss it with a tear, end it movie star style.
I wish I could stay devoid of attachment. That would mean no long, strung out, emotionally unfulfilling last sentiments. It leaves such an empty feeling it makes me feel sick. I wish this were me being dramatic, me being over emotional and making it all up because I've been home to long. Its not though. Its the truth. Which makes it the most bittersweet last words I could possibly give you.
Another awkward silence.
<3
Kate*
I've been faking it that I don't care. Best friends for 9 years, its impossible not to care. For me atleast. I know you're okay as he kisses away the you that was mine. I miss having you there when it was needed even though you're not needed much these days. I still have to see the absence of you everyday when we don't look at eachother. I have to hear the fake hellos when we're driving to school. I'm witinessing it all fading out and you nor I is trying to stop it. Lets just wave it goodbye and give a pretty little smile, gloss it with a tear, end it movie star style.
I wish I could stay devoid of attachment. That would mean no long, strung out, emotionally unfulfilling last sentiments. It leaves such an empty feeling it makes me feel sick. I wish this were me being dramatic, me being over emotional and making it all up because I've been home to long. Its not though. Its the truth. Which makes it the most bittersweet last words I could possibly give you.
Another awkward silence.
<3
Kate*