(no subject)
this is what the one year anniversary of 9/11 means to me:
it means getting woken up at 0400 by my room mate and best friend and being told that she was just in a really bad car accident and that her car is totalled. it means having nightmares for the rest of the night that everyone i love is going to die in a car accident. it means buying a box of mint milano cookies for $2.69, a vanilla coke for $1.25 and a newspaper with a tattered flag on the front page for 23 cents. it means calling the vet and finding out that i have to take jadzia and ezri in tomorrow because they are having upper respiratory problems and they need antibiotics. it means figuring out how i am going to smuggle them onto the bus to get them to the vet. it means finding a way to get ezri to the vet without her pooping on everything cause she still gets really nervous. it means walking around school and seeing some people with american flags sticking out of their backpacks and then hearing people talk trash about them a few feet away. it means having way more reading than i can handle for my classes. it means that i have to hold my patriotic tongue so that i don't lash out at wannabe hippie assholes who don't appreciate the fact that they live in the greatest country on earth. it means finding out that my boyfriend didn't get the job he really wanted even tho he passed through every interview with flying colors and even got called in to take a tour of the place. it means not knowing what the fuck is going to happen in the next 10 years or even 5 years or even 1 year at the rate things are going in the world. it means reading the new york times eveyday for the past year and seeing things get worse and worse while most people remain completely clueless. it means that maybe gene's timeline will happen and WWIII is inevitable. it means that today is roxann dawson's birthday and it sucks that her (and everyone else's on this day) birthday is going to forever have this shadow over it. it means finding the strength within myself to see that this has been a shitty day and that i can't blame it on the date. it means appreciating life and love that much more than i did yesterday. it means forcing myself to see the world through rose-colored glasses when it's easier to see it through ashes. it means that i am alive for one more day so i better get off of my ass and do something productive.
that's what the one year anniversary of 9-11 means to me.
it means getting woken up at 0400 by my room mate and best friend and being told that she was just in a really bad car accident and that her car is totalled. it means having nightmares for the rest of the night that everyone i love is going to die in a car accident. it means buying a box of mint milano cookies for $2.69, a vanilla coke for $1.25 and a newspaper with a tattered flag on the front page for 23 cents. it means calling the vet and finding out that i have to take jadzia and ezri in tomorrow because they are having upper respiratory problems and they need antibiotics. it means figuring out how i am going to smuggle them onto the bus to get them to the vet. it means finding a way to get ezri to the vet without her pooping on everything cause she still gets really nervous. it means walking around school and seeing some people with american flags sticking out of their backpacks and then hearing people talk trash about them a few feet away. it means having way more reading than i can handle for my classes. it means that i have to hold my patriotic tongue so that i don't lash out at wannabe hippie assholes who don't appreciate the fact that they live in the greatest country on earth. it means finding out that my boyfriend didn't get the job he really wanted even tho he passed through every interview with flying colors and even got called in to take a tour of the place. it means not knowing what the fuck is going to happen in the next 10 years or even 5 years or even 1 year at the rate things are going in the world. it means reading the new york times eveyday for the past year and seeing things get worse and worse while most people remain completely clueless. it means that maybe gene's timeline will happen and WWIII is inevitable. it means that today is roxann dawson's birthday and it sucks that her (and everyone else's on this day) birthday is going to forever have this shadow over it. it means finding the strength within myself to see that this has been a shitty day and that i can't blame it on the date. it means appreciating life and love that much more than i did yesterday. it means forcing myself to see the world through rose-colored glasses when it's easier to see it through ashes. it means that i am alive for one more day so i better get off of my ass and do something productive.
that's what the one year anniversary of 9-11 means to me.