:-D
i just got home from visiting sheena n nick. so much fun. lol but fer real though. . sheena n justin left to go get justin 2 tattoos and me n nick chilled up there for an hour and a half maybe more. . . lol. i dunno we talked but like not like non-stop. i dunno i enjoyed it though. he was like bored out of his mind. i kind of was too. but we made the best of it. its ok cuz i really enjoy just being around him. he always puts a smile on my face. when sheena n justin got back he gave me a hug since i was leaving and was like i dunno how to explain it. . oh well. . . but i was like u should walk me outside. . . . so then he gave me a few good-bye kisses and yeah. . . finally i left :-/ i def didn't want to tho. . . i *heart* being around him. i would be devistated if anything happened between us. like i dunno if things got messed up and like we ended up not together. or another girl came between us or something. i haven't been fer real happy in a long time. i have seriously had to pretend i was happy and make myself believe wut was going on in my life made me happy. . . but it didn;t. but nick, makes me really happy. i don't want to be away from him because im afraid he will find some other girl and forget all about me. i am like deathly afraid of losing him and i really don't even have him. . . how do i always manage to fall completely head over heels for a guy before i really get to know him? i seriously just get lost in his eyes and i get butterflies in my stomach when i get near him. i know it sounds cheesey but thats really how i feel. and i can't believe i am actually admitting to it. if he saw this he would prolly think i was *f*in crazy. but i *heart* him and really enjoy being around him. and i hope things either stay how they are or get better. no worse. but i think im don't for now. . . . <3
<3
<3