One-shot - Tatsuya's Story 1/2 [song-fic]
Yeah, so as I promised, my first one-shot that I write for real, I mean, it's not a dream, it's just my imagination~ And for my first attempt, I'm using Ueda Tatsuya's solo, Ai no Hana... I really don't know why, it just, when I'm listening to this song, I just wanna write something... Weird, right? So, here it goes~~ Douzo...
Tatsuya’s Story… ~~ [Based on the song by Ueda Tatsuya - Ai no Hana]
Title: Tatsuya’s Story…
Rating: Judged it by yourself??? I really didn’t know what to put here… [gomen, ne~~?^^]
Summary: One day, Tatsuya found something that makes him think about his past time… The past that he thought he would regret, but… How much that memory changes his life, or it was just a memory, a past memory…?
Notes: Suddenly, I get fired up to write something regarding this song… This song really gives me a feeling, a melancholic feeling, but somehow, I like it… So, here it is… And, this fic is un-beta-ed… The reason? I didn’t have any beta~~ (^_^)
*#*#*#*#*#*#~*~#*#*#*#*#*#*
“ano ato itsumo no you ni kiteita namida to
arubamu itsumo no you ni nagame teta kata sumi de hitori…”
Tatsuya looks around his apartment. “Ah~ Finally, living alone… No more nagging from Yumi nee-chan…” Tatsuya see the weather outside through the window. “Rain…” That word comes from his lips when he sees the rain. He smiled. “I’m wondering if I could see a rainbow after this, after there’s no rain pouring.” And he still smiled. He walks to the balcony of the apartment, trying to view the rain more close. Accidentally, he kicked something on the way to the balcony. “A box…” He said it slowly. “What box is this? Why I didn’t remember that I have this box?” He asked to himself. He feel interested about what was actually were inside that box. He squat, and unwrapped the box slowly and carefully. He looked inside the box.
“Album?” Tatsuya shocked. He didn’t remember that he had bought any album from his old house. “What album was this?” He asked himself. His mind was still thinking about the album, the album that he didn’t remember he owned. He sits at the floor. His hand begins to flipping the album. His eyes stopped at the first pages. The first picture.
“Ryo-kun?” The word slipped out from his lips. He could only say that name. The name that he had erased from his mind, quite a long time ago.
Ryo was a guy that had hurts his feeling before. It was around five years ago, when the story between them started. The story that maybe had made Tatsuya felt sic to fall in love with anyone, anymore…
*#*#*#*#*#*#~*~#*#*#*#*#*#*
“mata mienai mirai ni obieteiru
dareka dakishime te tada aishite hou shi~i…”
Tatsuya did realize, he can’t lie about his own feelings. He wasn’t feeling sick to fall in love to anyone, buy he actually afraid to do that… He kept thinking, what if he’ll be hurt again? And what if at that time, his heart can’t be healed anymore? He was actually just afraid to fall in love, anymore…
But the truth too, he really wanted to be loved. He really wants to feel the warm embrace from someone, feeling to protect and be protected. He really wants to fall in love again, even at the same time he afraid to…
*#*#*#*#*#*#~*~#*#*#*#*#*#*
“ai no kakera wa
nigedasanu you ni kudake no you ni
ryouoto de dakishime
tono mama kisetsu ga toomi sugitemo
ano yasashi sama wasurenai…”
Seven years ago…
“Happy anniversary Ryo-kun~ Happy 1st anniversary~” Tatsuya pushed Ryo’s bedroom door. He had plan a surprise for Ryo, but it seems like it was vice versa. It seems like Ryo had plan a bigger surprise for Tatsuya. Tatsuya was so shocked when he realized that Ryo weren’t alone at his bedroom. Lying next to Ryo was a woman. At that time, Tatsuya feel so pain at his chest.
“How could you doing something like this to me, Ryo-kun?” Tatsuya run after he screams those words. A box that he had held all this time, fell from his hand. He run away, as fast as possible, run away fron Ryo’s house. Tears drops at his cheek as he run. He want to cry. He just need to… He just want to…
Ryo that was so shocked about what had just happen get u from his bed. He walks slowly to the box that Tatsuya had left. He open it slowly, his hand were shaking, and he look what was inside the box.
Ryo shocked. “A cake?” He just look at the cake. He was too shocked about what had just happen. “A cake?” He repeat his words.
It is. It was a cake. The content of the box was a cake. A cake that Tatsuya had made with all of his heart. A cake that Tatsuya had decorate with all of his heart. A cake. Specially made for him, Ryo.
“Tatsuya…”
“Tatsuya, I’m sorry… Forgive me, Tatsuya…” Ryo knocks Tatsuya’s bedroom door a few times. “It’s all was a mistake… I’m sorry… I don’t know how it could be like that… Please, give me a chance… Tatsuya…” Ryo beg for a chance for correcting his mistake.
Tatsuya still crying. He just need to… “Leave me alone, Ryo!” Tatsuya scream in his cry. “I don’t need you to be here! Just go, Ryo!”
Ryo let out a sigh. “I’ll be back, later…” Ryo try to give some space for Tatsuya, hoping that his mistake will be forgiven. He walks away. But someone stop him.
Yumi, Tatsuya’s sister was there, in front of Ryo’s face. She’s having fire inside her eyes. Fire of anger. She was so mad at Ryo. PANG!!! Yumi slap Ryo’s face ones. “That’s for hurting my little brother’s feeling!” Yumi then walks to Tatsuya’s bedroom. She knocks the door twice. “Nee, Tat-chan… I’ve prepared some meal for you… I’ll be leaving now, since my class will start really soon… Remember to eat, ok? Ja~ I’ll go now…” Yumi walks a few steps before heading back to Tatsuya’s bedroom. “Nee… I’ll be back quite late tonight, around 10 p.m., maybe… Or late than that… So, don’t wait for me tonight.” She then walks out.
Ryo just look at Yumi when she walks away. He was shocked when he realized that he had just been slapped by Yumi. Too shocked to even do or saying anything.
Now…
“Why, in the first place, I fall in love to him? Is he a very good guy, until I can love him that much?” Tatsuya just smile when his eyes stuck a photo. “Maybe, he was a good guy…”
Eight years ago…
“Ne, Tatsuya… Why are you crying?” ask Ryo while he put his arms around Tatsuya’s shoulder.
“No… Nothing…”
“Tatsuya, if nothing was happening, you will not be here, isolating yourself, and having tears flow down from your cheek…” Ryo wipe away the tears from Tatsuya’s cheek.
“Was I wrong?” Tatsuya take a deep breath. “Am I wrong for being so weak?”
Ryo just staring Tatsuya’s face and smiling. “Ne Tatsuya, do you want to know something?” ask Ryo suddenly.
“What?”
“You hate yourself like this, but I like this as it was…”
Tatsuya look at Ryo’s face - did not understand. “What do you mean, Ryo-kun?”
“You said that you hate yourself so much, someone that was weak, someone that always need someone else to help you, someone that always depends on the other people, but I like it… Because I feel - you need me, and I’ll always be there for you.” Ryo smile to Tatsuya.
Tatsuya stunned by what Ryo said just now. He somehow doesn’t really understand what Ryo mean by that.
“Ne Tatsuya, would you accept me as someone special in your heart?”
“Yes.” Tatsuya was shocked about what Ryo ask him just now, but he was more shocked of his own answer. ‘Oh my GOD! My lips say it without I want to -’
Ryo smile brightly as he listened to Tatsuya’s answer. He was so happy when Tatsuya accepting him as ‘someone’, not just a ‘no one’… He was shocked too, since he never put such a high hope that Tatsuya will accept him. “Ne Tatsuya, I promise from this time onwards, I’ll protect you… Because you are so special for me…”
Now…
“Did I actually make a wrong decision at that time? For accepting him inside my life? Am I wrong?” Tatsuya asked himself as he continues flipping the album. Remembering the past of him own life - trying to recall back the memories that somehow fade from his mind.
Eight years ago…
Kazuya looked at his cousin. “Really?”
Tatsuya nodded his head a few times.
“But a few of my friends said that he’s not a good guy, you know… He’s kinda playboy and things… You really do date him?”
Again, Tatsuya nods his head. “I don’t know what was happening actually… I just - open up a bit of myself - that’s all… It was like that, I think…”
“Did Yumi know about this?”
“Yumi nee-chan? Of course she knows it. I never kept any secret from her and you know that…” Tatsuya laugh a bit.
“The truth is, I’m jealous to you, Tatsuya…” Kazuya said suddenly.
“Why?”
“Yumi nee-chan really loves you so much. She such a good sister, wasn’t it?”
Tatsuya smile as he heard what Kazuya just said about his sister. “She is… If wasn’t because of her, I won’t be this Tatsuya. I’ll be a weaker Tatsuya than this. It definitely wasn’t an easy thing for you if everyone, a lot of people, look down to you, and having no one to support you. But she there, for me… Always… Such a lucky me to have her as my sister, right?”
Tatsuya does love Yumi so much. Yumi was the best sister Tatsuya could ever have - that was the thing that he always says to his own self. Yumi was always protecting Tatsuya, support Tatsuya, show Tatsuya how much she love him, and Tatsuya too - was so thankful for having a sister like her - Yumi.
Tatsuya have a weak body. He can’t move so much, or he’ll collapse or so. Tatsuya hate this body so much, He can’t do a lot of things that the other could do, or even the things that he want to do. Since he was little, his classmates do look down upon him. He did once call a sissy - by a girl. He was so upset every time he remembered it. He’s not a sissy. He’s a guy. A man. Not a sissy. Not at all. But he could say nothing, even to try to deny it - somehow, it does sounds true to him - because he has a weak body, different from the other guys.
“But Tatsuya, I hope that you won’t be too serious about him… I afraid that you’ll get hurt, sooner or later…
Now…
“If I’m following Kazuya’s advice, maybe at that time, I won’t be hurts by him… Maybe, when I’m seeing he and that woman, I could face him and just say - oh, its okay, I’m not loving you too actually… But… It was impossible for me for not to fall in love to him.”
Eight years ago…
“Who was she, Ryo-kun?” Tatsuya pointing his index finger to the girl that was holding Ryo’s hand.
“Tatsuya? She was… She… Me…” Ryo let out a sigh. He realized, he could give no excuse to Tatsuya. “Misa - she was my girlfriend.”
Tatsuya run, leaving Ryo and the girl just like that. The girl just look Tatsuya as he walks away.
“Tatsuya!!!” Ryo scream as he run, chasing Tatsuya that was still running. “I’m sorry!!! It was just a mistake!!! Tatsuya, I’m sorry!!!”
Now…
“How stupid I am to giving him a chance after that accident. After meeting him holding a girl’s hand, I almost lose my life… My body, my heart - it can’t really take it. But he comes back to me, asking for a second chance, and I give it to him. And he repeats it - I find himself with a girl, at his bed, during our first anniversary… I’m such a stupid person…” Tatsuya put that album aside. He looks out through the window. “Now, I really hope to see a rainbow after this - after rains stop pouring…” He smile again, for the nth time of the day, despite the pain that he feel right now - remembering the past. “Because he was nice to me… Very kind towards me… And because of that, I can’t hate him...”
*#*#*#*#*#*#~*~#*#*#*#*#*#*
“Sashikomu hikari ni sukoshi
Memai wo todomete
Watashi wa tsutsumikomu you ni
yasashiku hanabira ga mau…”
“It was still early on spring. And it always raining…” Tatsuya put the album beside him. “If the raining stop before evening, I could take an evening walk, maybe I could see sun-setting too…”
That evening, Tatsuya walk at the park near his apartment, alone… He felt a bit cold. The rains just stop when he decides to walk outside. He keeps walking along the park. Sakura petals fall over him, gently.
*#*#*#*#*#*#~*~#*#*#*#*#*#*
“Kono machi no kesshiki no iro wo kawatte
adokenai yasashii kaze ga houhou wo naderu…”
“A few weeks ago, it was still winter… All of these sakura trees were still covered with snow…” Tatsuya smile, again. “Ne, Ryo-kun… Somehow, I don’t know why, but I felt thankful to you, because you did once said that you love me. I believe, there’s no one in this world will say it to me, since no one did love me like you did, Ryo-kun…”
Tatsuya’s Story… ~~ [Based on the song by Ueda Tatsuya - Ai no Hana]
Title: Tatsuya’s Story…
Rating: Judged it by yourself??? I really didn’t know what to put here… [gomen, ne~~?^^]
Summary: One day, Tatsuya found something that makes him think about his past time… The past that he thought he would regret, but… How much that memory changes his life, or it was just a memory, a past memory…?
Notes: Suddenly, I get fired up to write something regarding this song… This song really gives me a feeling, a melancholic feeling, but somehow, I like it… So, here it is… And, this fic is un-beta-ed… The reason? I didn’t have any beta~~ (^_^)
*#*#*#*#*#*#~*~#*#*#*#*#*#*
“ano ato itsumo no you ni kiteita namida to
arubamu itsumo no you ni nagame teta kata sumi de hitori…”
Tatsuya looks around his apartment. “Ah~ Finally, living alone… No more nagging from Yumi nee-chan…” Tatsuya see the weather outside through the window. “Rain…” That word comes from his lips when he sees the rain. He smiled. “I’m wondering if I could see a rainbow after this, after there’s no rain pouring.” And he still smiled. He walks to the balcony of the apartment, trying to view the rain more close. Accidentally, he kicked something on the way to the balcony. “A box…” He said it slowly. “What box is this? Why I didn’t remember that I have this box?” He asked to himself. He feel interested about what was actually were inside that box. He squat, and unwrapped the box slowly and carefully. He looked inside the box.
“Album?” Tatsuya shocked. He didn’t remember that he had bought any album from his old house. “What album was this?” He asked himself. His mind was still thinking about the album, the album that he didn’t remember he owned. He sits at the floor. His hand begins to flipping the album. His eyes stopped at the first pages. The first picture.
“Ryo-kun?” The word slipped out from his lips. He could only say that name. The name that he had erased from his mind, quite a long time ago.
Ryo was a guy that had hurts his feeling before. It was around five years ago, when the story between them started. The story that maybe had made Tatsuya felt sic to fall in love with anyone, anymore…
*#*#*#*#*#*#~*~#*#*#*#*#*#*
“mata mienai mirai ni obieteiru
dareka dakishime te tada aishite hou shi~i…”
Tatsuya did realize, he can’t lie about his own feelings. He wasn’t feeling sick to fall in love to anyone, buy he actually afraid to do that… He kept thinking, what if he’ll be hurt again? And what if at that time, his heart can’t be healed anymore? He was actually just afraid to fall in love, anymore…
But the truth too, he really wanted to be loved. He really wants to feel the warm embrace from someone, feeling to protect and be protected. He really wants to fall in love again, even at the same time he afraid to…
*#*#*#*#*#*#~*~#*#*#*#*#*#*
“ai no kakera wa
nigedasanu you ni kudake no you ni
ryouoto de dakishime
tono mama kisetsu ga toomi sugitemo
ano yasashi sama wasurenai…”
Seven years ago…
“Happy anniversary Ryo-kun~ Happy 1st anniversary~” Tatsuya pushed Ryo’s bedroom door. He had plan a surprise for Ryo, but it seems like it was vice versa. It seems like Ryo had plan a bigger surprise for Tatsuya. Tatsuya was so shocked when he realized that Ryo weren’t alone at his bedroom. Lying next to Ryo was a woman. At that time, Tatsuya feel so pain at his chest.
“How could you doing something like this to me, Ryo-kun?” Tatsuya run after he screams those words. A box that he had held all this time, fell from his hand. He run away, as fast as possible, run away fron Ryo’s house. Tears drops at his cheek as he run. He want to cry. He just need to… He just want to…
Ryo that was so shocked about what had just happen get u from his bed. He walks slowly to the box that Tatsuya had left. He open it slowly, his hand were shaking, and he look what was inside the box.
Ryo shocked. “A cake?” He just look at the cake. He was too shocked about what had just happen. “A cake?” He repeat his words.
It is. It was a cake. The content of the box was a cake. A cake that Tatsuya had made with all of his heart. A cake that Tatsuya had decorate with all of his heart. A cake. Specially made for him, Ryo.
“Tatsuya…”
“Tatsuya, I’m sorry… Forgive me, Tatsuya…” Ryo knocks Tatsuya’s bedroom door a few times. “It’s all was a mistake… I’m sorry… I don’t know how it could be like that… Please, give me a chance… Tatsuya…” Ryo beg for a chance for correcting his mistake.
Tatsuya still crying. He just need to… “Leave me alone, Ryo!” Tatsuya scream in his cry. “I don’t need you to be here! Just go, Ryo!”
Ryo let out a sigh. “I’ll be back, later…” Ryo try to give some space for Tatsuya, hoping that his mistake will be forgiven. He walks away. But someone stop him.
Yumi, Tatsuya’s sister was there, in front of Ryo’s face. She’s having fire inside her eyes. Fire of anger. She was so mad at Ryo. PANG!!! Yumi slap Ryo’s face ones. “That’s for hurting my little brother’s feeling!” Yumi then walks to Tatsuya’s bedroom. She knocks the door twice. “Nee, Tat-chan… I’ve prepared some meal for you… I’ll be leaving now, since my class will start really soon… Remember to eat, ok? Ja~ I’ll go now…” Yumi walks a few steps before heading back to Tatsuya’s bedroom. “Nee… I’ll be back quite late tonight, around 10 p.m., maybe… Or late than that… So, don’t wait for me tonight.” She then walks out.
Ryo just look at Yumi when she walks away. He was shocked when he realized that he had just been slapped by Yumi. Too shocked to even do or saying anything.
Now…
“Why, in the first place, I fall in love to him? Is he a very good guy, until I can love him that much?” Tatsuya just smile when his eyes stuck a photo. “Maybe, he was a good guy…”
Eight years ago…
“Ne, Tatsuya… Why are you crying?” ask Ryo while he put his arms around Tatsuya’s shoulder.
“No… Nothing…”
“Tatsuya, if nothing was happening, you will not be here, isolating yourself, and having tears flow down from your cheek…” Ryo wipe away the tears from Tatsuya’s cheek.
“Was I wrong?” Tatsuya take a deep breath. “Am I wrong for being so weak?”
Ryo just staring Tatsuya’s face and smiling. “Ne Tatsuya, do you want to know something?” ask Ryo suddenly.
“What?”
“You hate yourself like this, but I like this as it was…”
Tatsuya look at Ryo’s face - did not understand. “What do you mean, Ryo-kun?”
“You said that you hate yourself so much, someone that was weak, someone that always need someone else to help you, someone that always depends on the other people, but I like it… Because I feel - you need me, and I’ll always be there for you.” Ryo smile to Tatsuya.
Tatsuya stunned by what Ryo said just now. He somehow doesn’t really understand what Ryo mean by that.
“Ne Tatsuya, would you accept me as someone special in your heart?”
“Yes.” Tatsuya was shocked about what Ryo ask him just now, but he was more shocked of his own answer. ‘Oh my GOD! My lips say it without I want to -’
Ryo smile brightly as he listened to Tatsuya’s answer. He was so happy when Tatsuya accepting him as ‘someone’, not just a ‘no one’… He was shocked too, since he never put such a high hope that Tatsuya will accept him. “Ne Tatsuya, I promise from this time onwards, I’ll protect you… Because you are so special for me…”
Now…
“Did I actually make a wrong decision at that time? For accepting him inside my life? Am I wrong?” Tatsuya asked himself as he continues flipping the album. Remembering the past of him own life - trying to recall back the memories that somehow fade from his mind.
Eight years ago…
Kazuya looked at his cousin. “Really?”
Tatsuya nodded his head a few times.
“But a few of my friends said that he’s not a good guy, you know… He’s kinda playboy and things… You really do date him?”
Again, Tatsuya nods his head. “I don’t know what was happening actually… I just - open up a bit of myself - that’s all… It was like that, I think…”
“Did Yumi know about this?”
“Yumi nee-chan? Of course she knows it. I never kept any secret from her and you know that…” Tatsuya laugh a bit.
“The truth is, I’m jealous to you, Tatsuya…” Kazuya said suddenly.
“Why?”
“Yumi nee-chan really loves you so much. She such a good sister, wasn’t it?”
Tatsuya smile as he heard what Kazuya just said about his sister. “She is… If wasn’t because of her, I won’t be this Tatsuya. I’ll be a weaker Tatsuya than this. It definitely wasn’t an easy thing for you if everyone, a lot of people, look down to you, and having no one to support you. But she there, for me… Always… Such a lucky me to have her as my sister, right?”
Tatsuya does love Yumi so much. Yumi was the best sister Tatsuya could ever have - that was the thing that he always says to his own self. Yumi was always protecting Tatsuya, support Tatsuya, show Tatsuya how much she love him, and Tatsuya too - was so thankful for having a sister like her - Yumi.
Tatsuya have a weak body. He can’t move so much, or he’ll collapse or so. Tatsuya hate this body so much, He can’t do a lot of things that the other could do, or even the things that he want to do. Since he was little, his classmates do look down upon him. He did once call a sissy - by a girl. He was so upset every time he remembered it. He’s not a sissy. He’s a guy. A man. Not a sissy. Not at all. But he could say nothing, even to try to deny it - somehow, it does sounds true to him - because he has a weak body, different from the other guys.
“But Tatsuya, I hope that you won’t be too serious about him… I afraid that you’ll get hurt, sooner or later…
Now…
“If I’m following Kazuya’s advice, maybe at that time, I won’t be hurts by him… Maybe, when I’m seeing he and that woman, I could face him and just say - oh, its okay, I’m not loving you too actually… But… It was impossible for me for not to fall in love to him.”
Eight years ago…
“Who was she, Ryo-kun?” Tatsuya pointing his index finger to the girl that was holding Ryo’s hand.
“Tatsuya? She was… She… Me…” Ryo let out a sigh. He realized, he could give no excuse to Tatsuya. “Misa - she was my girlfriend.”
Tatsuya run, leaving Ryo and the girl just like that. The girl just look Tatsuya as he walks away.
“Tatsuya!!!” Ryo scream as he run, chasing Tatsuya that was still running. “I’m sorry!!! It was just a mistake!!! Tatsuya, I’m sorry!!!”
Now…
“How stupid I am to giving him a chance after that accident. After meeting him holding a girl’s hand, I almost lose my life… My body, my heart - it can’t really take it. But he comes back to me, asking for a second chance, and I give it to him. And he repeats it - I find himself with a girl, at his bed, during our first anniversary… I’m such a stupid person…” Tatsuya put that album aside. He looks out through the window. “Now, I really hope to see a rainbow after this - after rains stop pouring…” He smile again, for the nth time of the day, despite the pain that he feel right now - remembering the past. “Because he was nice to me… Very kind towards me… And because of that, I can’t hate him...”
*#*#*#*#*#*#~*~#*#*#*#*#*#*
“Sashikomu hikari ni sukoshi
Memai wo todomete
Watashi wa tsutsumikomu you ni
yasashiku hanabira ga mau…”
“It was still early on spring. And it always raining…” Tatsuya put the album beside him. “If the raining stop before evening, I could take an evening walk, maybe I could see sun-setting too…”
That evening, Tatsuya walk at the park near his apartment, alone… He felt a bit cold. The rains just stop when he decides to walk outside. He keeps walking along the park. Sakura petals fall over him, gently.
*#*#*#*#*#*#~*~#*#*#*#*#*#*
“Kono machi no kesshiki no iro wo kawatte
adokenai yasashii kaze ga houhou wo naderu…”
“A few weeks ago, it was still winter… All of these sakura trees were still covered with snow…” Tatsuya smile, again. “Ne, Ryo-kun… Somehow, I don’t know why, but I felt thankful to you, because you did once said that you love me. I believe, there’s no one in this world will say it to me, since no one did love me like you did, Ryo-kun…”