One-shot - Ai Nante Part 1/3 [song-fic]

[princess_ai_a]

A/N: Just an experiment… And it turned out to be a one-shot…  It was supposed to be RyoDa, but the result was Akame… I really don’t know why… (>_<) Hope you’ll like it… Hope you’ll enjoy this story as much as I enjoy writing it… (^_^) Yeah, and forgive me for the mistakes of timeline if there’s any of it… Since I’m not sure with a lot of thing, actually… Comment, please? I’m still a learner… So, I really need comments… *bow* Onegaishimasu~~ Ah, and it was un-beta-ed… So, I’m sooo sorry for all the grammatical errors… Reason? I didn’t have any beta-er… Is there anyone want to help me with it?


~*~ KAZUYA’S SIDE ~*~

“dore dake aruitekitan darou
furimuitara namida no ato
kizutsuke kizutsuki tadoritsuita basho
ima koko ni kimi ga iru…”

Tatsuya pat Kazuya’s shoulder a few times. “Are you okay?”

“…” No answercome out from Kazuya’s mouth. He just staring at the letter. The letter that Jin give him before Jin go to Los Angeles. LA.

“Kazuya…” Tatsuya call him again.

“…” Kazuya still refuse to say anything. He walk to the couch, and curl up into a ball. He hug a small pillow… The couch pillow.

Junnosuke, Koki, and Yuichi just watch Kazuya and Tatsuya as Tatsuya tries to talk to Kazuya. They really don’t know what they should do to make Kazuya say something. Even a word. Since yesterday, since Jin had gone, since he received that letter from Jin, Kazuya refuse to talk to anyone. Even to his own family member, not his parents, nor his siblings. Not Yuicchiro, not Koji, not even to Yuya, his closest siblings. They know it after Koki received a call from Yuicchiro, Kazuya’s eldest brother, that was so worried about his conditions.

Tatsuya look to Yuichi. He let out a sigh before walk to the other and sited himself beside Junnosuke. “Luckily, we had no activity this week. Or else…” Again, he let out a sigh.

“Is his condition right now did have something to do with ‘that’ letter?” ask Koki. He look at Kazuya. He know, he realize, in any second, tears will drop from Kazuya’s eyes. He did see that face before, and he hate to see it again. It was early last year. And it was because of Jin. So as now. Kazuya’s debut with Tomohisa makes the other member upset, and a lot of people too. Jin was so mad when he knows about it. About the debut. Of course it was an upset thing for all of them, because Kazuya debut before they, the most important, he debuted not as a part of KAT-TUN. Just in a temporary unit called Shuuji to Akira. They were upset, but they just congratulated the younger guy so that he won’t feel so bad. But Jin. Jin let out his anger directly to Kazuya. Directly to Kazuya’s face, before he walks away from Kazuya. Just like that. The other could do nothing for Kazuya. But luckily at that time, Tomohisa were there, always for Kazuya, to help the younger guy gain back his spirits. But now, Koki doubt that anyone in this world could actually help Kazuya. No one… No one could help him heal those wounds. It just - no one.

Tatsuya look at Kazuya, too. “Probably…” Tatsuya was so worried about Kazuya. Kazuya is not a person that will tell anything to anyone else. He is a type of person that’ll keep everything, everything inside his heart. Just for himself.

Kazuya just watch a guy with a girl from far away. He walks slowly, following the couple. He smirks. “Now I know how does it feel to be a stalker.”

The couple walks towards a building. Kazuya stop walking. “So, you really did something like this to me, huh?” He takes out his cellphone, dialing a number. “Can you come to my apartment? I need your help with something. … You can? … Ok… … Thanks… …” He then take an elevator to 9th floor. He waited his ‘guess’ next to the elevator’s door.

A few minutes later, a guy comes out from the elevator. Quickly, Kazuya grab his hands. The guy turn back, shocked at first, but he smile to Kazuya after that.

“Hai…” Kazuya said as he waves his right hand to the guy. A smile rose at his lips. He then bowed a little to that guy.

“Why? Why you want to meet me? And why it was here?” The guy smiling to Kazuya.

“I need your help… But please, don’t ask anything yet, okay?” Kazuya then grab the guy’s left hand, make him walk to his apartment. While he was in front of his apartment’s door, he take a deep breath, before letting it out, and start to open the door with his keys.

“Are you okay?”

Kazuya nod his head. “I think so… Perhaps…” Kazuya smile to that person. Kazuya try to give the sweetest smile to that guy, but he knows, he realized, that it - his smile - looked so pathetic.

That person pats Kazuya’s shoulder a few times.

When they were in the apartment, Kazuya pulls the guy to his bedroom. That guy just following Kazuya, even he got no idea what Kazuya was trying to do - not even one thing. When they were in front of the door - the bedroom door - they both could hear sounds that come from that room. Passionate sounds, moans, and all the worst sound that Kazuya could ever think about at that time - was heard by him and that guy. Kazuya’s hand was a bit shaky, but that guy doesn’t know why. Because of anger, sad, pain or what - that guy really don’t know. He tightened the grab at that person hand. He then put his arms at that guys shoulder. That guy really doesn’t know what is happening, but he can’t ask or say anything. His lips was like had been sealed by something. Slowly, Kazuya opened the door - the bedroom door.

As expected by Kazuya, Jin was there, at their bed, with a woman - a naked woman. Kazuya was stunned, so does Jin, that women and that person.

‘He was there, with a woman, at our bed…’ Kazuya thinks.

Jin just looking at Kazuya. His hands were busy pulling the comforter to cover his body, and that woman’s body. Jin really does thought that Kazuya will get angry to him - or something like that. But his thought was all wrong.

Kazuya smiling to Jin. His hands were already embracing Tomohisa’s waist. “Ne, YamaPi… It seems like we come at the wrong time, ne~? Let’s go to your place, then…” Kazuya was still smiling at that time.

Tomohisa’s eyes focus on Kazuya’s eyes. It was teary. Tomohisa does realize that Kazuya was actually holding back his tears. He embraced back Kazuya, a little too tight, and smile back to Kazuya. “I think so, too, Kazuya. Let’s go to my place, then…” Tomohisa then pull Kazuya’s hand, making them both out from that apartment, from that building.

The tears that Kazuya had held all this time, finally drop from his cheek, down to the earth. He just walks following Tomohisa’s step.

Tomohisa now understand what Kazuya was trying to do. ‘I understand it Kazuya… Your pride was so high until you did something like this, ne? You really don’t want to be seen as the one that loss… You’re so you, Kazuya…’ Tomohisa bite his lower lips. Jin was his best friend, the best friend of him. But it doesn’t mean that he could accept everything from him. Especially if it hurts other people. He just can’t approve that kind of actions. And it was Kazuya, someone that he cares. Someone that he thought as his own little brother, even in a lot of times, Kazuya was treating himself as someone younger. He can’t accept it at all. No one in this world have the right to hurt other people - it just no one.

Tomohisa walks them to a park. It was afternoon, so it was a safe place for them to be there. There’s not a lot of people were there in times like this. Tomohisa make Kazuya sit at the park’s bench. He himself then sits beside Kazuya. Right after he sits, Kazuya embrace him tightly.

Kazuya keep crying like a little baby. He don’t even care if any fans were there, if anyone seeing him crying, seeing him with Tomohisa - he just don’t care. He keeps crying without saying anything. A few people that were there looking at them, because of Kazuya’s sudden loud cry.

“It’s okay, Kazuya… It’ll be okay…” Tomohisa move his palm up and down at Kazuya’s back.

“Kazuya… Kazuya…”

Kazuya opened his eyes slowly. A few seconds later, Koki’s worried face could be seen y him.

“Are you okay?” ask Koki. His voice was a bit shaky, he was really does worried about the younger guy. “Do you actually crying right now?”

Kazuya touch his cheek. He could feel his fingers were wet, because of tears that he didn’t know how it could happen ‘Am I crying in sleep?’ But he didn’t have the answer. “I… I’m having a bad dream just now…” Kazuya then just walks out from the dressing room as he wipes his tears off.

The other just watching Kazuya as the youngest guy walks out. “Yeah, a dream… About Jin…” said Junnosuke. But he gain angry glares from the other. Realized he just saying something wrong, he just look down, continuing playing his PSP. “Gomen…” He mutters it.

Yuichi takes his bag, and take out an MP3, and starts practicing his beatboxing, as slowly as possible. Tatsuya just flipping through a magazine, while Koki send a mail to one of his little brother, with an unknown reason of big grin on his face.

A few minutes later, Kazuya comes in while his hands wiping his wet face using a small towel. Nothing comes out from his mouth.

Suddenly, an idea pop-out from Tatsuya’s head. “Ne Kazuya, why not you sleep at my place? Since there’s no one in my house right now… Well, I’m sure the other agrees about this, right?” Tatsuya wink to the others.

The other just nods their heads a few times.

Kazuya just look to the other’s faces, one by one. A few seconds later, he nods twice, agreeing Tatsuya’s suggestions. “Okay…” he said as smile rose at his lips.

Right after Kazuya said his word, the door suddenly opened by someone. Two people entering the room - Tomohisa and Ryo, with a big and bright smile at their face.

“Ne, Kazu-chan~~ Do you want to go out with us tonight?” ask Tomohisa happily.

Kazuya was about to saying something, but being cut by Koki. “No! He’ll coming with us, to Tat-chan’s house…” Koki say it as he crossed his hand.

Tatsuya just smile as he sees the childish part of Koki and Tomohisa. He then pats Kazuya’s shoulder a few times and smile to Kazuya when Kazuya look at his face. “Ne, it’s up to you…”

Kazuya just stare Tatsuya’s face. “Must I choose? Can’t I just go back to my apartment alone?”

“NO!” answer five guys - Tomohisa, Ryo, Tatsuya, Yuichi, and Koki. Junnosuke was sit, still, playing his PSP, without saying any word - afraid if he’ll say something wrong again.

Another idea pop-up in Tatsuya’s head. “Or… You too could come to my place…?” ask Tatsuya as he smile to both Ryo and Tomohisa.

“Ok~!” Tomohisa squeaks. Listen to Tomohisa’s agreements, Ryo just nod his head a few times. “So, we’ll come to your place around 7 p.m., okay? Bye~!” Tomohisa say as he was dragged by Ryo to go out from KAT-TUN’s dressing room, because Yuya is calling them from outside.

“Ah~! You two have come…” Tatsuya said as he opened the door. “Come in…”

“Woah~~! Tat-chan wearing apron, so cute~~!” Tomohisa poke Tatsuya’s cheek that was blushing at the moment.

“Hey! I’m a guy, if you did not realize it yet. So, don’t call me something like cute, ok? I’m a guy…” He pat Tomohisa’s back.

Ryo just walk following Tatsuya with smile at his lips, his mind still thinking about what Tomohisa just say to Tatsuya. The truth is, he never thought about seeing Tatsuya like that - the other side of Tatsuya that was that gentle. Which it was kinda cute, Ryo did thinks. He didn’t hate Tatsuya, but it was impossible for them to become friends. Almost impossible, actually. Because they had nothing in common at all - not a single thing. He keep walking, still following Tomohisa, that bring him to the guestroom. Junnosuke was like the time Ryo sees him, still playing his PSP, in his own world, while Koki and Kazuya was playing chess. ‘Chess?’ Ryo thinks.

Koki smirks. “Kame-chan, this is bad~~” Koki laugh. “If this situation continue, you’ll lose, Kame-chan~”

Ryo sited himself beside Koki, interested in their games.

Tomohisa walks following Tatsuya to the kitchen. There, he sees Tatsuya cooking something, and Yuichi chopping something. He looks at both of the guys while smiling.

Tatsuya smile to Tomohisa. “It was just pasta. I hope you’ll like it…”

Tomohisa nod his head a few times. “Ah~ It’s okay… But, are you alone in this house?”

“My parents were on holiday, and all of the maids were on their leaves. So, yeah… I’m, alone… Well, all of our maids were girls, so…” Tatsuya smile, he knows that Tomohisa understand what he means.

Tomohisa just smile, he does understand what Tatsuya mean. “How was he?” ask Tomohisa, about Kazuya.

Tatsuya was still smiling. “A little bit better than before. He look strong, doesn’t he? But I believe, we both, all of us, does know the truth. Inside him, wasn’t as strong as the outside…” Tatsuya let out a sight, before continue. “He’ll be okay…”

Yuichi and Tomohisa just listen to Tatsuya’s words. Inside them, they do hope the same thing - Kazuya will be okay.

Later that night, Koki and Yuichi decide to come back to their homes. One of Koki’s little brother suddenly got flu, and Yuichi forget to fed up Mister, his puppy, and he was so sure that none of his family member did fed it up.

While watching a DVD, Junnosuke fall asleep at the couch, left four men who still awake. Tatsuya walk to a room and appear with a comforter. He then covers Junnosuke’s body with it. Tatsuya bring Tomohisa and Ryo to a bedroom for the guest.

“I hope this was okay for you two. Kazuya, he’ll sleep with me.”

Tomohisa and Ryo just nods their heads, agree. Both of them step into the room, looking at the bed. ‘Why it was a bed for two? Isn’t there is any single bed?’ both of them thinks the same thing.

When Tatsuya walks away from there, they both just looking at each other, no, staring to each other. The truth is - Ryo hate when he needs to sleep with Tomohisa, even if they sleep at separate bed - he just hates it. First, Tomohisa is so scary when he was sleeping. He’ll kick anything, anyone that was around him. And second, he sometime did some un-definite sound when he was sleeping. Ryo did felt it once, when they were out for a holiday - for just two of them. The place that they supposed to stay was out of empty room for separate bed, so they actually need to share the bed - just like now.

“Don’t kick me!” Ryo scream, suddenly. “If you did like what you did did during our holiday at that time, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life - NO - you won’t even live to regret it.” Ryo then just grab the towel that Tatsuya had put at the bed and walk to the bathroom.

“Ne, Ryo-chan~ You didn’t need to be that angry~ It was an accident…” Tomohisa pouts.

Half an hour later, Ryo found himself sleeping at the floor. He felt so pain at his back. “I’ll kill you, YamaPi… I’ll kill you tomorrow… I’ll kill you…” Ryo keep cursing until he sleeps back at the floor. He was too tired even to get up to sleep at the couch outside.

A few minutes later, the door was opened, slowly. Tatsuya appear with smile at his lips, before fade - because he was shock finding Ryo sleeping at the floor. Listen to the sound that was made by the door, Ryo open his eyes. Tatsuya then squat beside Ryo.

“Why are you sleeping here?” ask Tatsuya.

“That guy-” Ryo’s index finger pointing at Tomohisa. “-will kill me by his kicks…”

Tatsuya keep looking at Tomohisa’s sleeping style. The only word that he could think - ugly. He never thought that he could see an idol sleeping like that. He smiles. “I have a futon at me room, let’s sleep there?”

Ryo followed Tatsuya to his bedroom. It was a huge room, like a prince’s would have - that was Ryo thinks about. ‘He was a son of such a rich person… Lucky boy…’

Both of them, Ryo and Tatsuya were shocked when they realized that Kazuya was crying, but in his sleep. Ryo want to wakes Kazuya up, but stopped by Tatsuya.

“Let him cry… He won’t cry if he was awake… Such a pride he has…”

Ryo just nod.

Tatsuya bring out a futon from a wardrobe, and ready to sleep at the futon.

But Ryo force him to sleep at his own bed. “He might need you if he awake suddenly. I… I’m not so good to comfort other people…”

Tatsuya nod.

“ai nante
kimi dake sa
itsudemo motome sugite
ai nante
kimi nashi ja imi nai yo
ikirarenai…”

“Jin~!!!” Kazuya run, chasing Jin. “Jin~!!!”

Suddenly, Jin stops walking. “WHAT DO YOU WANT KAZUYA?! WHAT DO YOU WANT?!” Jin screams. “Why you need to debut with Pi first?! Before KAT-TUN?! Why Kazuya?! Why?!”

“It wasn’t my decision, Jin… It was Kitagawa-san’s decisions… I didn’t have any other choice, Jin…” Kazuya hug Jin from back. “I’m sorry Jin… I’m sorry…”

In just a second, Jin freeing himself from Kazuya’s embraces, and walks away from Kazuya - just like that.

Kazuya kneeling. Tears that he had hold this entire time move down from his eyes, to his cheek, to his chin, down to the ground. “Don’t leave me, Jin… Don’t leave me, please, Jin… I love you, Jin… I always love you… Please don’t leave me Jin…” cry Kazuya, even he does realize that Jin weren’t there anymore.

“JIN!!!” Kazuya screams. His breath was fast. He moves himself, to a sit position. He takes a pillow, hug it. Hug it tightly - as tight as possible. Beside him, Tatsuya just looking at him, with questioning look, but Tatsuya didn’t say anything.

Ryo wakes up slowly, open his eyes slowly, so slow, even he just listen a very loud scream made by Kazuya, because he was so tired. He could look Kazuya and Tatsuya was sit at the bed, without saying anything. He could also see Kazuya’s hard breath.

A few second after that, Tomohisa appear at Tatsuya’s room with such a panic face. “What happen?!”

At this moment, Kazuya is already in Tatsuya’s embrace. Both Ryo and Tomohisa knows that Kazuya was crying in Tatsuya’s embrace.

“I’m sorry… *hicks* I’m having a bad dream just now… *hicks* I’m sorry… *hicks*” Kazuya says in his cries.

For the first time, Tatsuya and the others see Kazuya like that. His walls of pride were break down. His crying like a small kid that lose his candy.

Tatsuya touch Kazuya’s head, trying to convince Kazuya that he was there, and he will always be there for him.

Feel relieved because nothing was actually happen, Tomohisa walks towards Ryo that just looking at Kazuya and Tatsuya. “Ryo-chan~ Why are you sleeping here~? I miss you, Ryo-chan~” Tomohisa tries to hug Ryo.

Feel like just get an electric shock, Ryo push Tomohisa away from him. “You’re the one that kick me out from that bed…” Ryo then full the comforter to cover his body, ready to continue to sleep.

“Ryo-chan~” Tomohisa tugging the blanket.

Ryo just clicking his tongue to Tomohisa.

Kazuya and Tatsuya laugh seeing Tomohisa’s and Ryo’s actions.

“Ne, Tat-chan… I promise to you that I’ll be strong. Not just from outside look, but in here too…” Kazuya put the palm of his hand at his own chest. “I’ll try my best, to be the best. I’ll try my best, to make sure that you and the other will not worrying about me too much. And I’ll try my best to become strong, not only for me, but for everyone that around me, that always be there for me…”

A smile rose at Tatsuya’s lips. He nod. “Un… But you, Kazuya, need to remember this, always… That you’re not alone… If you feel like you need to say something, share things, or anything, you always have me, Yuichi, Koki, and Junnosuke too… Okay? And those two humans too.” Tatsuya pointing his index finger to Tomohisa and Ryo, before continue, “Don’t keep everything just for you, okay?”

“Thank you, Tatsuya…”