Lay My Head Down
Title: Lay My Head Down
Author: pri_rage
Rating: PG-13
Pairings: Rachel/Quinn, tiny Puck/Kurt
Disclaimer: Characters not mine, just borrowing them for a bit.
Spoilers: Season One.
Word Count: 4907
Summary: Future Fic. . Rachel left to New York and is coming back for winter break. They used to be good friends, but stopped talking after Rachel left. Rachel goes to a new bar, and is surprised to find Quinn there.
ANI:This is a songfic of sorts, but not really. The name of the fic is after a song by the Indigo Girls. I was going to work and listened to this song and it reminded of many Faberry fics that Quinn left Rachel. So I decided to write about after they left each other, but without a established relationship.
ANII: No beta, so all mistakes are mine. English is not my first language.
Rachel Berry was back to Lima. Not back to stay, only for winter break. But she was back none the less. Most of the other original New Directions were back too, maybe all of them. Rachel wasn’t sure. She just knew she was back, staying at a hotel and that close to the hotel was a new bar, one that wasn’t there last time she was in Lima, or that she had never noticed.
So, as any normal college kid, she decided to check it out, maybe have some beers or something stronger (she wasn’t really planing on drinking at all, but she liked to think as a college kid did). She didn’t have anything else to do. Obviously, she called all other glee kids, because she wasn’t stupid enough to go to a bar alone at night. It might be only Lima, but there are bad people everywhere, and she couldn’t risk her talent.
The place was smoky and dark. There was music playing, too loud in her opinion. The walls, floor and ceiling were black. There was a multitude of colors everywhere, that she had no idea where they came from, but kept the place from being too dark, despite the dark walls. The bar had spotlights for each stool, and she decided to go there to wait and ordered a water. She wasn’t actually planing on drinking, she knew it would be bad for her singing voice.
Rachel Berry, being Rachel Berry, was early. She wanted to take a look at the place before her friends arrived to make sure it was safe. There were five people there at the moment, 4 of which were guys. But she didn’t focus on the people for to long, missing the fact that 2 guys were holding hands, one of them with too much leather, another with clothes too tight to be worn by your everyday regular straight guy. She saw a security guard when she came in, and there was a few more inside. She decided the place was safe.
Soon her Glee friends arrived, and they all sat at a table, the guys ordering beers and the girls ordering multicolored drinks. She got a virgin Cosmo, just so she wasn’t drinking something as boring as water. They were talking loud, but the place was not empty anymore, so it wasn’t weird or anything like that. She was unusually quiet, distant, her mind nowhere and everywhere. Being at home felt weird, something was missing. But no one noticed, or didn’t care.
She studied her friends. Finn looked the same, dressed the same, and acted the same. She wondered what it was that she found so charming about him. It was obviously gone now. Mercedes was even more a diva then she was before, if that was even possible. She was the center of the attention, laughing loudly and gossiping. Tina had no black clothing what so ever, wearing a light jeans and a red shirt. She was less shy, but maybe that was the alcohol speaking. She was sitting at Artie’s lap, so that hadn’t changed. Artie was a completely different guy. His hair was up, and his clothes less... nerdy. Kurt was the same old Kurt, style and attitude.
The others weren’t there. Finn told her Brittany and Santana wouldn’t be coming home for winter break. They lost contact with Matt and Mike, and had no idea what happened to them. Puck and Quinn were.... no one really knew. Some said they got married, some said they are at rehab somewhere, some said they were kicked out of Ohio. With so many rumors going around, they didn’t even care to call them. Not Rachel’s idea, she wanted everybody to be there. But they weren’t and she was left thinking about the two of them. One of them specifically.
Soon the Glee kids decided to go somewhere else. She didn’t know why, she wasn’t really paying attention to their conversation. She decided to stay, which got a weird look from everybody, and a knowing smirk from Kurt. She moved back to sit at the bar and continued with her virgin drinks.
Suddenly the music stopped and she noticed, for the first time, a stage, which was now with some guy introducing some band. She got her drink and moved to an empty table closer to the stage. From the cheering, they were known, and they were good. She looked over the crowd with a smile on her face. One day the cheering would be for her, she knew it. Not in a bar, obviously, but as loud for sure.
Then she noticed why the Glee kids might have left and looked weird at her. She looked around and noticed women and men making out. But not with each other, but with the same sex. Some were just holding hands, and some girls were looking at her, a predatory look in her eyes.
She looked back at the stage, a smile still in her lips. She was never one to define her sexuality, but she never felt uncomfortable in gay bars as her friends seemed to. Even Kurt. She actually liked it better. It wasn’t that she preferred women, but that she preferred the culture. She had, after all, two gay dads, and they always took her to pride parades, and always brought their friends home. She always had fun.
She was taken back to reality when the band started to play. A man and a woman, both with guitars. A guy with Mohawk and a woman with blond hair, to be more specific. Quinn and Puck. Quinn and Puck in a band together. Quinn and Puck in a band together playing at a gay bar.
The party's kicked up a few notches
Look at us getting loose
She leans back against the wall and she watches, tugging her collar like it might be a noose.
Rachel wanted to laugh, but she was mesmerized with Quinn. The girl was wearing a black tank top and a dark jeans. Her blonde hair was curly in some parts and fairly disheveled. She looked older, but not the type of age gained from stress. No, she looked mature. Her face was expressive.
And everyone's tied to their thing
to their past or their drink or the date that they bring
I just get tired all of sudden taking it in.
She was singing a song by the Indigo Girls, and Rachel couldn’t help but laugh this time. Quinn Fabray, Christ Crusader, Celibacy Club and with the most conservative family ever was now playing at a gay bar. Not just any music, but from one of the gayest band of the century. Yes, she had definitely grown up.
And I want to lay my head down on you
Because you're the only solid thing in this room
A room full of changes, strangers, illusion, confusion,
I speak from my heart but I'm not really sure if it's true.
I wanna lay my head down on you.
Listening to the lyrics, she couldn’t help but think the song was directed at her. They had become close friends after she gave the baby away. It started slow, but soon it seemed like they had always been friends. Even though Quinn was back to the Cheerios, she wasn’t the same. They both applied to school in New York. Rachel was planning to ask Quinn to live with her. But when they got their acceptance letters, Quinn decided to stay in Lima. Rachel never understood. The girl got in NYU. Why would she choose Lime, OH over that? Choose to be a Lima loser?
Oh they say don't waste too much time planning
Or you'll get rug ripped out
And the only way you'll be satisfied
Is learning to live without.
But some plan for the kingdom of heaven
And some take their chances and bet lucky seven
I don't know what to believe, I just show up and breathe anymore.
To say that their friendship was just that would be stupid. They both knew there was something more. They never talked about it, never acted on their feelings, but it was there. Santana teased the girls endlessly, but to no avail. They never did anything.
And I wanna lay my head down on you
Because you're the only solid thing in this room
A room full of dressers, professors, lookers, hookers
If I don't get out I'll do something I don't wanna do.
And I wanna lay my head down on you.
But Rachel never dwelled on the fact that she was pretty much abandoned by her best friend. Sure, she was mad for a while, but there was some things about Quinn she never understood. This was one of them. She couldn’t let the fact that she was abandoned once more affect her. She focused on her dream, and so far so good. Julliard, 4.0 GPA, starred in several plays from the school, despite being only a sophomore.
Was it so long ago
That we sat and talked in your car
Your things were all packed
And the place you were headed not really that far
Years later I think
That I would have been much more alive
To have taken you up on your offer and taken that drive
She smiled. She had found a new appreciation to the song. She had heard it before, her fathers were a fan of Indigo Girls. But now the song had a meaning. And coming from Quinn... She felt wetness in her hand that was on the table, and noticed a tear. She was crying. She wiped her face, and straightened in her chair. She noticed a woman approaching the table. She sat in a chair in her table, and smiled at her.
Oh well everything that's come before us leads us to where we are now
And that's simple, I know so why can't I let go of the feeling
That I'm lost somehow
I'm just a ghost looking in
Out of my own life just visiting
In search of a body to have and to hold and to keep and to sleep.
“She’s quite good, ain’t she? I’ve cried myself a few times.” The woman said. Rachel gave her small smile, but her eyes didn’t leave Quinn. The woman didn’t move, but didn’t talk either.
I wanna lay my head down on you
because you're the only solid thing in this room
A room full of missed chance, slow dance, cold fate heartache
I showed up for a party and saw my life story full view
And I wanna lay my head down on you.
After that song, they played from quite different styles, some songs she didn’t recognize. Time flew by, and Rachel had a new favorite band. They announced having a CD with a few songs from the night, and some other tracks Rachel was not familiar with. They left the stage, heading to the bar, getting a beer.
Rachel made her move then, but didn’t move fast enough to get Puck. She wondered how awkward it would be to meet Quinn. She put her arm on Quinn’s shoulder, and the girl turned around, with a smirk. The smirk soon was gone, all left was shock. Rachel was thankfull she didn’t touch Quinn when she was still drinking, or she would be full of beer on her favorite outfit.
“Rachel?”
“Quinn, it’s been a while.” Rachel said with a soft smile.
The blonde girl nodded, her eyes avoiding Rachel’s.
“Do you want something to drink? I can get you anything for free.” Quinn said with a smile, getting a grasp of herself.
“I’m good, thanks. You were pretty good out there. Didn’t know you had it in you.”
“Thank you. Puck taught me the guitar, and we decided to give it a try. Glam was in need of a regular band to play during week nights, and we got the spot. It was pretty exciting.”
“When was that?”
“Right after high school. We made the audition while we were still in school, but I didn’t think we were any good. They called us, and we got the job.”
“You even have a CD?”
“Seems like people really likes us, so we made one. Nothing professional, we used his computer, so the sound is a little rough.”
“I’m impressed. And I want a CD. You guys are really good.”
Quinn answered with a shy smile.
They made small talk. Rachel kept asking about where Puck was, but Quinn made it clear he was not going to be around tonight, had something, or someone, to do. She wasn’t shocked. She didn’t expect the guy to have changed. Although she did wonder where he would find a girl in a gay bar.
The time went by fast, and soon the bar was turning on the lights. Rachel didn’t expect to get along that well with Quinn again.
“So, you’re staying with your parents?” Quinn asked. Since Quinn played in the band, she didn’t have to leave just yet.
“No, at the Hotel across the street.”
“Is everything at home fine?” Quinn asked, concerned.
“Oh, yeah, yeah, it’s fine. But my fathers decided that the house was too quiet, so they have exchange students at home.”
“And you’re okay with that?”
“Yes, I believe it’s important to have family like mine receiving kids from another culture. Non-Americans make a lot of misconceptions about our people, and I believe my fathers are the opposite of the regular American stereotype.”
“But what about not being able to stay at home during winter break?”
“While I would have preferred to stay in a familiar environment, staying at a hotel is like the dorm in New York. And I spend most of my day at home anyway. It’s just a place to sleep.”
“Stay with me.” Quinn blurted out. Rachel inclined her head, studying Quinn.”I mean, it’s not home, but it’s better then being alone. The only problem is that I live with Puck. But we have a bed in our office, so you should be fine.”
Rachel weighed the options. She wasn’t stupid enough to believe that the Hotel would be a better place, but she didn’t know about staying with Quinn. It has been almost two years, and she didn’t know if they could stay in the comfortable relationship they had that night for the rest of the month.
“Sure” Rachel said. It was better then a Hotel, and she could aways change her mind if things got weird.
#####
“I’m sorry if it’s a mess. I always clean, but Puck doesn’t. And he got the house from himself tonight.”
As they entered the house, Rachel noticed the mess Quinn was talking about. There were beer bottles on a table and some other liquor bottles on the floor. They entered the living room, and there was a few clothing items scattered around, and a few more beers.
“Do you want anything to drink?”
“Water will be just fine.”
“I see you still haven’t give in. You know that not alcohol is bad for you. You don’t need to get drunk.”
“As I mentioned several times before, alcohol can...”
“Damage you vocal chords and make you loose control of your actions, thus providing an opening for potential accidents that might affect your nose. I know, I know.” Quinn rolled her eyes, repeating the lesson she heard a hundred times. She handed a cup of water to Rachel and got a beer for herself.
A comfortable silence fell between them, until Puck disturbed the peace.
“Hey, Quinn, I thought we agreed that you wouldn’t be bringing...” Until them Puck hadn’t noticed Rachel. “Rachel Berry? What are you doing here?”
“Hello to you too, Noah.”
“Right, Hi.” Noah said passing her and grabbing two beers.
“And I’m here for winter break.”
“Cool. How’s New York treating you? I heard that there are a lot of hot people there. Maybe I could visit you. Puckzilla invades the city. Wouldn’t know what hit them.”
Quinn rolled her eyes.
“Ignore him.” Quinn said, doing the same.
“New York is great, thank you for your concern.” Rachel answered, choosing to follow Quinn’s instructions.
“Hey Puck, I...” A blonde guy entered the kitchen, just wearing shorts. Rachel furrowed her eyebrows. Why was a half-naked guy on the kitchen calling for Puck? Unless... ”Hey, Quinn, didn’t expect to see you here.”
“Hey, J. I didn’t expect to see you here either.”
“Well, you know Puck. Can’t keep it in his pants.”
That was a change. Puck, gay? Rachel didn’t know what to make of this. She expected from any other guy in Glee club, but never Puck. She looked at Quinn, who seemed to be containing her laugh.
“Uh... Let’s go, J.” Puck dragged the guy from the kitchen leaving them alone.
Quinn started laughing immediately.
“What’s so funny?” Rachel asked annoyed, while running on her brain anything in high school that might have indicated Puck’s sexuality.
“Your face.” Quinn said stopping to talk only for a second and starting to laugh again.
“You should have warned me that his company was male.”
“How the hell would he find a woman that would be up to sleep with him on Glam?” She said, laughing more lightly now, but not stopping completely.
“It’s Noah!” Rachel squealed.
“Well, according to him, he was tired of the female population of Lima, so he decided to try something new.” Quinn stopped laughing, and now was only smiling.” Truth is, I think he was scared of the competition.” She said winking at Rachel.
What ,Quinn flirting with her? I mean, sure they had something back then. But Rachel never expected something so direct from Quinn. She was sure the girl would go through denial, but she seemed to be very comfortable. That is, if she was really flirting with her.
“Could you show me where I’m sleeping. I’m tired.”
“Rachel Berry. If I didn’t know better, I would think you are avoiding me.” Quinn said getting uncomfortably close to the brunette.
“Then I’m glad you do know better.” Rachel snapped at Quinn. She didn’t sound mad, but she didn’t seem to be in the mood to talk, so Quinn let it go.
She led the shorter girl upstairs, showed her the room and gave her a towel for the bathroom.
“We can stop by your hotel tomorrow to get your stuff.” Quinn said and left. Rachel is certain she heard the girl say something like “I missed you.” but couldn’t be sure. So she started thinking about how Quinn Fabray and Noah Puckerman were not drug addicts, or married or convicted. They were together in a band that played at a gay bar. She fell asleep before she could make any sense of the scenario, dreaming of a blonde superstar.
#####
Rachel woke up in a weird place. It was not her hotel, it didn’t look like a hotel room. It didn’t look like home either. She left the bed, and looked at pictures on the wall. Quinn and Puck were together in all pictures, some with musicians and artists. She saw a newspaper clip on their duo, reporting a band competition that they won, a picture of them smiling. She passed her fingers over Quinn smile, noticing how genuinely happy she looked. Maybe she staying in Lima was the best for her. She smiled and heard someone knocking.
“Come in.”
“Hey, I didn’t know if you were awake or not.” She said, two cups of coffee in her hands. She noticed what I was looking at and smiled. “Pretty cool, huh? Puck got so wasted when we won, I thought we would have to use the money we won to pay for medical bills for alcohol poisoning.” She said looking at the picture laughing. She handed Rachel the cup and sat on a desk placed by the bed and crossed her legs. “It was November and the festival was held in an open space. It was so cold. I was wearing a tank top and jeans. I had to jump throughout the show to keep me warm. Imagine doing that with a guitar strapped around your neck. I’m pretty sure we won because they thought I was ‘unusual’ and not because of my music talent.” She said, smiling at the memory.
“That isn’t true. You and Noah are very good artists. I would have expected a little more rock and roll and less folk, but you guys are good.”
“It was fight to get Puck into it. But I told him acoustic guitar was badass and got all the ladies.”
“I thought he didn’t like the ‘ladies’ anymore.”
“He still does. He just prefer men. He says it’s even more badass. Don’t ask me what his logic is, I’ve been trying to find out for a while.”
Rachel smiled.
“While I would love to stay and talk more, I have work in” Quinn looked at her watch. “Right now, actually. Shit, my boss isn’t going to be happy.”
“Do you have to curse?”
“Yes, it’s a great stress release. I’ll call you to pick up your stuff when your done. Feel free to spend all day here, though.” Quinn said, rushing out of the room, leaving a smiling Rachel behind.
#####
A few days passed. Quinn was mostly out of the house, and Rachel was always at home. The brunette always saw Quinn play, meaning she spent most of her nights at Glam. It was fun, and Quinn was fun. Rachel noticed she flirted with anyone with two legs. Despite feeling a little jealous, she couldn’t complain, the blonde flirted with her as much as she did with the others. She didn’t know if it meant anything, Quinn had changed a lot, and she couldn’t read the girl.
One night she talked to Quinn about the glee clubbers, and she was ok with them coming, so Rachel invited them. They decided to make it a surprise.
They sat at the same table as the last time they were there, and Kurt questioned if Rachel was having a coming out party. She ignored him and went after Quinn.
“Hey, how are you doing?” Rachel said after finding her in the bar. They were far from the table, and there was plenty of people that blocked them from the others.
“Freaked out. What if they think it’s stupid?” She said, after downing a cup of something Rachel had no idea what it was. She was sure it had alcohol. Quinn didn’t normally drink before performing, so she knew she was really uncomforable with the situation.
“Hey, you don’t have to worry. If anyone, Puck should worry. Not you. You are amazing. And you guys won a musical festival. That should mean something”
J came and announced their band. Quinn finished a beer and stood up.
“And besides, I have a superior musical training. What I say is more important then what they say.”
Quinn seemed to calm down and laughed at Rachel.
“You haven’t changed a thing, Berry.” She said, and left. Rachel watched her go and then made her way to the table.
“Rachel, why did you abandon us? I don’t feel comfortable here. There are guys giving me creepy looks.” Finn said when she sat at the table.
“It’s called ‘checking you out’. And it’s a gay bar, don’t be shocked.” Kurt said, sounding bored.
“Well, I think you guys would be really interested in seeing their band. They are great, and this coming from me, it means they are really good.” Rachel said with a radiant smile.
Kurt mumbled something under his breath, and those turned backwards from the stage changed their position.
On stage, the mohawked boy took his shirt and threw at some guys. He was now with baggy jeans, pretty much all of his underwear showing, and his guitar. He was singing a song Quinn told her he had written. The blonde was not yet at the stage.
“Puck?” Mercedes squealed. Kurt was pretty much drooling at the sight. The other had either shock or confusion etched on their faces. It was very amusing for Rachel, who had a smirk on her face.
Quinn finally went up the stage, and Rachel forgot how to breath. She heard someone say her name, but she didn’t know who. The blonde musician was wearing something that looked like a bikini top, but it could be her bra, and jeans. Very tight jeans. She had a music note tattooed on her lower abdomen and a navel piercing. Rachel also caught a glimpse of a part tattoo on her lower back, but didn’t see what it was. She really, really wanted to find out.
Yep, Rachel really didn’t think Quinn had that in her.
They played more rock songs that night, and Rachel was as shocked as the other kids. She thought Quinn should stick to rock. It looked much better. Or maybe it was her exposed stomach that looked better.
When they were over, they came to the glee club table and talked loudly and started catching up. Rachel was immobile the whole time, sometimes with her mouth closed, sometimes it was open. She really tried to get over it, but it was hard. Her mind was filled with imaged of Quinn’s stomach, her navel piercing and her tongue going over that perfect part of the blonde’s body.
“You’re drooling.”
Rachel was brought back from her daydream by the girl of her thoughts, who was smirking at her.
“I didn’t know you were still interested in Noah.” Quin said after Rachel didn’t say anything.
“I’m not. You, on the other hand...” Rachel said, looking Quinn up and down.
“Really?”
“Oh My God, I said that out loud, didn’t I?” Rachel said, looking around to see if anybody had heard her. Fortunately, they hadn’t.
“Yes, you did.” Quinn said, moving her chair closer to Rachel, and putting her arm around the brunette.
“Can you just forget it ever happened. I think someone put something in my drink.” Rachel said, picking up her drink and looking at it to see if there something in there.
Quinn was smirking.
“I assume rock night is your favorite?” Quinn whispered in her ear, causing Rachel to blush. The brunette knew there was no way she would be able to deny anything to Quinn. And it’s not like she wanted to.
“You could say that, yes.” Rachel smiled at Quinn.
The blonde lay her head at the brunette’s shoulder and her hand enveloped the girl went to play with Rachel’s hair. They stayed that way for a while, looking at their friends talking, sometimes speaking as well. Puck kept sending knowing looks their way, which the girls ignored.
“Do you want to dance?” Quinn said so quietly, Rachel wasn’t so sure she had spoken at all. She turned to the blonde, who was looking at her. Quinn moved her hand and offered to Rachel, who took it in hers. the blonde stood up, and the brunette followed her.
They went to the middle of the dance floor. On the way, Quinn received several compliments and flirted. Rachel was not amused, but Quinn kept a smile on her face.
They started dancing, the bodies really close, making Rachel warm. Quinn was with one of her smirks. She pulled Rachel close.
“You not jealous of me flirting, are you Berry?” Quinn teased the girl. Rachel tried to move away from Quinn so she could be mad at her, but her bodies were too close, and the brunette just couldn’t think. “You should know they don’t stand a chance against you. We spent too much time not doing anything about ‘us’. It’s time we do.”
With that, Quinn kissed her. It took Rachel a while until she noticed that Quinn, Quinn Fabray, her high school crush, was kissing her. But she didn’t waste time when she did. She tangled one hand in the blonde hair and put the other on the girl’s hip, pushing her closer. She felt a tongue against her lips, and didn’t hesitate to let the girl in. They had to stop to breath, even though they didn’t want to.
It took they a while to regain their breaths, but when they did, they were both smiling.
“Puck was right, you are the best kisser.” Quinn broke the silence. They moved to the bar and Quinn ordered some water.
“How did you know?” Rachel asked. Quinn moved a hair strand that had fallen in front of her face and left her hand at the girl’s cheek.
“You kinda had a problem of being crazy whenever you where obsessed with someone. It wasn’t hard, really.”
“Why didn’t you do something about it?”
“Because I didn’t really know at the time. And I was waiting for you to make a move. You always did. I was hurt that you didn’t.” Quinn pouted.
“That was because with you, it was different. It is different.”
“I know, I’m a girl.”
“No, it wasn’t that. I felt different for you.” Rachel said, not wanting to say the word love just yet.
“Good. I do too.” Quinn said, kissing Rachel with all she had in her, expressing all her feeling through the kiss.
Author: pri_rage
Rating: PG-13
Pairings: Rachel/Quinn, tiny Puck/Kurt
Disclaimer: Characters not mine, just borrowing them for a bit.
Spoilers: Season One.
Word Count: 4907
Summary: Future Fic. . Rachel left to New York and is coming back for winter break. They used to be good friends, but stopped talking after Rachel left. Rachel goes to a new bar, and is surprised to find Quinn there.
ANI:This is a songfic of sorts, but not really. The name of the fic is after a song by the Indigo Girls. I was going to work and listened to this song and it reminded of many Faberry fics that Quinn left Rachel. So I decided to write about after they left each other, but without a established relationship.
ANII: No beta, so all mistakes are mine. English is not my first language.
Rachel Berry was back to Lima. Not back to stay, only for winter break. But she was back none the less. Most of the other original New Directions were back too, maybe all of them. Rachel wasn’t sure. She just knew she was back, staying at a hotel and that close to the hotel was a new bar, one that wasn’t there last time she was in Lima, or that she had never noticed.
So, as any normal college kid, she decided to check it out, maybe have some beers or something stronger (she wasn’t really planing on drinking at all, but she liked to think as a college kid did). She didn’t have anything else to do. Obviously, she called all other glee kids, because she wasn’t stupid enough to go to a bar alone at night. It might be only Lima, but there are bad people everywhere, and she couldn’t risk her talent.
The place was smoky and dark. There was music playing, too loud in her opinion. The walls, floor and ceiling were black. There was a multitude of colors everywhere, that she had no idea where they came from, but kept the place from being too dark, despite the dark walls. The bar had spotlights for each stool, and she decided to go there to wait and ordered a water. She wasn’t actually planing on drinking, she knew it would be bad for her singing voice.
Rachel Berry, being Rachel Berry, was early. She wanted to take a look at the place before her friends arrived to make sure it was safe. There were five people there at the moment, 4 of which were guys. But she didn’t focus on the people for to long, missing the fact that 2 guys were holding hands, one of them with too much leather, another with clothes too tight to be worn by your everyday regular straight guy. She saw a security guard when she came in, and there was a few more inside. She decided the place was safe.
Soon her Glee friends arrived, and they all sat at a table, the guys ordering beers and the girls ordering multicolored drinks. She got a virgin Cosmo, just so she wasn’t drinking something as boring as water. They were talking loud, but the place was not empty anymore, so it wasn’t weird or anything like that. She was unusually quiet, distant, her mind nowhere and everywhere. Being at home felt weird, something was missing. But no one noticed, or didn’t care.
She studied her friends. Finn looked the same, dressed the same, and acted the same. She wondered what it was that she found so charming about him. It was obviously gone now. Mercedes was even more a diva then she was before, if that was even possible. She was the center of the attention, laughing loudly and gossiping. Tina had no black clothing what so ever, wearing a light jeans and a red shirt. She was less shy, but maybe that was the alcohol speaking. She was sitting at Artie’s lap, so that hadn’t changed. Artie was a completely different guy. His hair was up, and his clothes less... nerdy. Kurt was the same old Kurt, style and attitude.
The others weren’t there. Finn told her Brittany and Santana wouldn’t be coming home for winter break. They lost contact with Matt and Mike, and had no idea what happened to them. Puck and Quinn were.... no one really knew. Some said they got married, some said they are at rehab somewhere, some said they were kicked out of Ohio. With so many rumors going around, they didn’t even care to call them. Not Rachel’s idea, she wanted everybody to be there. But they weren’t and she was left thinking about the two of them. One of them specifically.
Soon the Glee kids decided to go somewhere else. She didn’t know why, she wasn’t really paying attention to their conversation. She decided to stay, which got a weird look from everybody, and a knowing smirk from Kurt. She moved back to sit at the bar and continued with her virgin drinks.
Suddenly the music stopped and she noticed, for the first time, a stage, which was now with some guy introducing some band. She got her drink and moved to an empty table closer to the stage. From the cheering, they were known, and they were good. She looked over the crowd with a smile on her face. One day the cheering would be for her, she knew it. Not in a bar, obviously, but as loud for sure.
Then she noticed why the Glee kids might have left and looked weird at her. She looked around and noticed women and men making out. But not with each other, but with the same sex. Some were just holding hands, and some girls were looking at her, a predatory look in her eyes.
She looked back at the stage, a smile still in her lips. She was never one to define her sexuality, but she never felt uncomfortable in gay bars as her friends seemed to. Even Kurt. She actually liked it better. It wasn’t that she preferred women, but that she preferred the culture. She had, after all, two gay dads, and they always took her to pride parades, and always brought their friends home. She always had fun.
She was taken back to reality when the band started to play. A man and a woman, both with guitars. A guy with Mohawk and a woman with blond hair, to be more specific. Quinn and Puck. Quinn and Puck in a band together. Quinn and Puck in a band together playing at a gay bar.
The party's kicked up a few notches
Look at us getting loose
She leans back against the wall and she watches, tugging her collar like it might be a noose.
Rachel wanted to laugh, but she was mesmerized with Quinn. The girl was wearing a black tank top and a dark jeans. Her blonde hair was curly in some parts and fairly disheveled. She looked older, but not the type of age gained from stress. No, she looked mature. Her face was expressive.
And everyone's tied to their thing
to their past or their drink or the date that they bring
I just get tired all of sudden taking it in.
She was singing a song by the Indigo Girls, and Rachel couldn’t help but laugh this time. Quinn Fabray, Christ Crusader, Celibacy Club and with the most conservative family ever was now playing at a gay bar. Not just any music, but from one of the gayest band of the century. Yes, she had definitely grown up.
And I want to lay my head down on you
Because you're the only solid thing in this room
A room full of changes, strangers, illusion, confusion,
I speak from my heart but I'm not really sure if it's true.
I wanna lay my head down on you.
Listening to the lyrics, she couldn’t help but think the song was directed at her. They had become close friends after she gave the baby away. It started slow, but soon it seemed like they had always been friends. Even though Quinn was back to the Cheerios, she wasn’t the same. They both applied to school in New York. Rachel was planning to ask Quinn to live with her. But when they got their acceptance letters, Quinn decided to stay in Lima. Rachel never understood. The girl got in NYU. Why would she choose Lime, OH over that? Choose to be a Lima loser?
Oh they say don't waste too much time planning
Or you'll get rug ripped out
And the only way you'll be satisfied
Is learning to live without.
But some plan for the kingdom of heaven
And some take their chances and bet lucky seven
I don't know what to believe, I just show up and breathe anymore.
To say that their friendship was just that would be stupid. They both knew there was something more. They never talked about it, never acted on their feelings, but it was there. Santana teased the girls endlessly, but to no avail. They never did anything.
And I wanna lay my head down on you
Because you're the only solid thing in this room
A room full of dressers, professors, lookers, hookers
If I don't get out I'll do something I don't wanna do.
And I wanna lay my head down on you.
But Rachel never dwelled on the fact that she was pretty much abandoned by her best friend. Sure, she was mad for a while, but there was some things about Quinn she never understood. This was one of them. She couldn’t let the fact that she was abandoned once more affect her. She focused on her dream, and so far so good. Julliard, 4.0 GPA, starred in several plays from the school, despite being only a sophomore.
Was it so long ago
That we sat and talked in your car
Your things were all packed
And the place you were headed not really that far
Years later I think
That I would have been much more alive
To have taken you up on your offer and taken that drive
She smiled. She had found a new appreciation to the song. She had heard it before, her fathers were a fan of Indigo Girls. But now the song had a meaning. And coming from Quinn... She felt wetness in her hand that was on the table, and noticed a tear. She was crying. She wiped her face, and straightened in her chair. She noticed a woman approaching the table. She sat in a chair in her table, and smiled at her.
Oh well everything that's come before us leads us to where we are now
And that's simple, I know so why can't I let go of the feeling
That I'm lost somehow
I'm just a ghost looking in
Out of my own life just visiting
In search of a body to have and to hold and to keep and to sleep.
“She’s quite good, ain’t she? I’ve cried myself a few times.” The woman said. Rachel gave her small smile, but her eyes didn’t leave Quinn. The woman didn’t move, but didn’t talk either.
I wanna lay my head down on you
because you're the only solid thing in this room
A room full of missed chance, slow dance, cold fate heartache
I showed up for a party and saw my life story full view
And I wanna lay my head down on you.
After that song, they played from quite different styles, some songs she didn’t recognize. Time flew by, and Rachel had a new favorite band. They announced having a CD with a few songs from the night, and some other tracks Rachel was not familiar with. They left the stage, heading to the bar, getting a beer.
Rachel made her move then, but didn’t move fast enough to get Puck. She wondered how awkward it would be to meet Quinn. She put her arm on Quinn’s shoulder, and the girl turned around, with a smirk. The smirk soon was gone, all left was shock. Rachel was thankfull she didn’t touch Quinn when she was still drinking, or she would be full of beer on her favorite outfit.
“Rachel?”
“Quinn, it’s been a while.” Rachel said with a soft smile.
The blonde girl nodded, her eyes avoiding Rachel’s.
“Do you want something to drink? I can get you anything for free.” Quinn said with a smile, getting a grasp of herself.
“I’m good, thanks. You were pretty good out there. Didn’t know you had it in you.”
“Thank you. Puck taught me the guitar, and we decided to give it a try. Glam was in need of a regular band to play during week nights, and we got the spot. It was pretty exciting.”
“When was that?”
“Right after high school. We made the audition while we were still in school, but I didn’t think we were any good. They called us, and we got the job.”
“You even have a CD?”
“Seems like people really likes us, so we made one. Nothing professional, we used his computer, so the sound is a little rough.”
“I’m impressed. And I want a CD. You guys are really good.”
Quinn answered with a shy smile.
They made small talk. Rachel kept asking about where Puck was, but Quinn made it clear he was not going to be around tonight, had something, or someone, to do. She wasn’t shocked. She didn’t expect the guy to have changed. Although she did wonder where he would find a girl in a gay bar.
The time went by fast, and soon the bar was turning on the lights. Rachel didn’t expect to get along that well with Quinn again.
“So, you’re staying with your parents?” Quinn asked. Since Quinn played in the band, she didn’t have to leave just yet.
“No, at the Hotel across the street.”
“Is everything at home fine?” Quinn asked, concerned.
“Oh, yeah, yeah, it’s fine. But my fathers decided that the house was too quiet, so they have exchange students at home.”
“And you’re okay with that?”
“Yes, I believe it’s important to have family like mine receiving kids from another culture. Non-Americans make a lot of misconceptions about our people, and I believe my fathers are the opposite of the regular American stereotype.”
“But what about not being able to stay at home during winter break?”
“While I would have preferred to stay in a familiar environment, staying at a hotel is like the dorm in New York. And I spend most of my day at home anyway. It’s just a place to sleep.”
“Stay with me.” Quinn blurted out. Rachel inclined her head, studying Quinn.”I mean, it’s not home, but it’s better then being alone. The only problem is that I live with Puck. But we have a bed in our office, so you should be fine.”
Rachel weighed the options. She wasn’t stupid enough to believe that the Hotel would be a better place, but she didn’t know about staying with Quinn. It has been almost two years, and she didn’t know if they could stay in the comfortable relationship they had that night for the rest of the month.
“Sure” Rachel said. It was better then a Hotel, and she could aways change her mind if things got weird.
#####
“I’m sorry if it’s a mess. I always clean, but Puck doesn’t. And he got the house from himself tonight.”
As they entered the house, Rachel noticed the mess Quinn was talking about. There were beer bottles on a table and some other liquor bottles on the floor. They entered the living room, and there was a few clothing items scattered around, and a few more beers.
“Do you want anything to drink?”
“Water will be just fine.”
“I see you still haven’t give in. You know that not alcohol is bad for you. You don’t need to get drunk.”
“As I mentioned several times before, alcohol can...”
“Damage you vocal chords and make you loose control of your actions, thus providing an opening for potential accidents that might affect your nose. I know, I know.” Quinn rolled her eyes, repeating the lesson she heard a hundred times. She handed a cup of water to Rachel and got a beer for herself.
A comfortable silence fell between them, until Puck disturbed the peace.
“Hey, Quinn, I thought we agreed that you wouldn’t be bringing...” Until them Puck hadn’t noticed Rachel. “Rachel Berry? What are you doing here?”
“Hello to you too, Noah.”
“Right, Hi.” Noah said passing her and grabbing two beers.
“And I’m here for winter break.”
“Cool. How’s New York treating you? I heard that there are a lot of hot people there. Maybe I could visit you. Puckzilla invades the city. Wouldn’t know what hit them.”
Quinn rolled her eyes.
“Ignore him.” Quinn said, doing the same.
“New York is great, thank you for your concern.” Rachel answered, choosing to follow Quinn’s instructions.
“Hey Puck, I...” A blonde guy entered the kitchen, just wearing shorts. Rachel furrowed her eyebrows. Why was a half-naked guy on the kitchen calling for Puck? Unless... ”Hey, Quinn, didn’t expect to see you here.”
“Hey, J. I didn’t expect to see you here either.”
“Well, you know Puck. Can’t keep it in his pants.”
That was a change. Puck, gay? Rachel didn’t know what to make of this. She expected from any other guy in Glee club, but never Puck. She looked at Quinn, who seemed to be containing her laugh.
“Uh... Let’s go, J.” Puck dragged the guy from the kitchen leaving them alone.
Quinn started laughing immediately.
“What’s so funny?” Rachel asked annoyed, while running on her brain anything in high school that might have indicated Puck’s sexuality.
“Your face.” Quinn said stopping to talk only for a second and starting to laugh again.
“You should have warned me that his company was male.”
“How the hell would he find a woman that would be up to sleep with him on Glam?” She said, laughing more lightly now, but not stopping completely.
“It’s Noah!” Rachel squealed.
“Well, according to him, he was tired of the female population of Lima, so he decided to try something new.” Quinn stopped laughing, and now was only smiling.” Truth is, I think he was scared of the competition.” She said winking at Rachel.
What ,Quinn flirting with her? I mean, sure they had something back then. But Rachel never expected something so direct from Quinn. She was sure the girl would go through denial, but she seemed to be very comfortable. That is, if she was really flirting with her.
“Could you show me where I’m sleeping. I’m tired.”
“Rachel Berry. If I didn’t know better, I would think you are avoiding me.” Quinn said getting uncomfortably close to the brunette.
“Then I’m glad you do know better.” Rachel snapped at Quinn. She didn’t sound mad, but she didn’t seem to be in the mood to talk, so Quinn let it go.
She led the shorter girl upstairs, showed her the room and gave her a towel for the bathroom.
“We can stop by your hotel tomorrow to get your stuff.” Quinn said and left. Rachel is certain she heard the girl say something like “I missed you.” but couldn’t be sure. So she started thinking about how Quinn Fabray and Noah Puckerman were not drug addicts, or married or convicted. They were together in a band that played at a gay bar. She fell asleep before she could make any sense of the scenario, dreaming of a blonde superstar.
#####
Rachel woke up in a weird place. It was not her hotel, it didn’t look like a hotel room. It didn’t look like home either. She left the bed, and looked at pictures on the wall. Quinn and Puck were together in all pictures, some with musicians and artists. She saw a newspaper clip on their duo, reporting a band competition that they won, a picture of them smiling. She passed her fingers over Quinn smile, noticing how genuinely happy she looked. Maybe she staying in Lima was the best for her. She smiled and heard someone knocking.
“Come in.”
“Hey, I didn’t know if you were awake or not.” She said, two cups of coffee in her hands. She noticed what I was looking at and smiled. “Pretty cool, huh? Puck got so wasted when we won, I thought we would have to use the money we won to pay for medical bills for alcohol poisoning.” She said looking at the picture laughing. She handed Rachel the cup and sat on a desk placed by the bed and crossed her legs. “It was November and the festival was held in an open space. It was so cold. I was wearing a tank top and jeans. I had to jump throughout the show to keep me warm. Imagine doing that with a guitar strapped around your neck. I’m pretty sure we won because they thought I was ‘unusual’ and not because of my music talent.” She said, smiling at the memory.
“That isn’t true. You and Noah are very good artists. I would have expected a little more rock and roll and less folk, but you guys are good.”
“It was fight to get Puck into it. But I told him acoustic guitar was badass and got all the ladies.”
“I thought he didn’t like the ‘ladies’ anymore.”
“He still does. He just prefer men. He says it’s even more badass. Don’t ask me what his logic is, I’ve been trying to find out for a while.”
Rachel smiled.
“While I would love to stay and talk more, I have work in” Quinn looked at her watch. “Right now, actually. Shit, my boss isn’t going to be happy.”
“Do you have to curse?”
“Yes, it’s a great stress release. I’ll call you to pick up your stuff when your done. Feel free to spend all day here, though.” Quinn said, rushing out of the room, leaving a smiling Rachel behind.
#####
A few days passed. Quinn was mostly out of the house, and Rachel was always at home. The brunette always saw Quinn play, meaning she spent most of her nights at Glam. It was fun, and Quinn was fun. Rachel noticed she flirted with anyone with two legs. Despite feeling a little jealous, she couldn’t complain, the blonde flirted with her as much as she did with the others. She didn’t know if it meant anything, Quinn had changed a lot, and she couldn’t read the girl.
One night she talked to Quinn about the glee clubbers, and she was ok with them coming, so Rachel invited them. They decided to make it a surprise.
They sat at the same table as the last time they were there, and Kurt questioned if Rachel was having a coming out party. She ignored him and went after Quinn.
“Hey, how are you doing?” Rachel said after finding her in the bar. They were far from the table, and there was plenty of people that blocked them from the others.
“Freaked out. What if they think it’s stupid?” She said, after downing a cup of something Rachel had no idea what it was. She was sure it had alcohol. Quinn didn’t normally drink before performing, so she knew she was really uncomforable with the situation.
“Hey, you don’t have to worry. If anyone, Puck should worry. Not you. You are amazing. And you guys won a musical festival. That should mean something”
J came and announced their band. Quinn finished a beer and stood up.
“And besides, I have a superior musical training. What I say is more important then what they say.”
Quinn seemed to calm down and laughed at Rachel.
“You haven’t changed a thing, Berry.” She said, and left. Rachel watched her go and then made her way to the table.
“Rachel, why did you abandon us? I don’t feel comfortable here. There are guys giving me creepy looks.” Finn said when she sat at the table.
“It’s called ‘checking you out’. And it’s a gay bar, don’t be shocked.” Kurt said, sounding bored.
“Well, I think you guys would be really interested in seeing their band. They are great, and this coming from me, it means they are really good.” Rachel said with a radiant smile.
Kurt mumbled something under his breath, and those turned backwards from the stage changed their position.
On stage, the mohawked boy took his shirt and threw at some guys. He was now with baggy jeans, pretty much all of his underwear showing, and his guitar. He was singing a song Quinn told her he had written. The blonde was not yet at the stage.
“Puck?” Mercedes squealed. Kurt was pretty much drooling at the sight. The other had either shock or confusion etched on their faces. It was very amusing for Rachel, who had a smirk on her face.
Quinn finally went up the stage, and Rachel forgot how to breath. She heard someone say her name, but she didn’t know who. The blonde musician was wearing something that looked like a bikini top, but it could be her bra, and jeans. Very tight jeans. She had a music note tattooed on her lower abdomen and a navel piercing. Rachel also caught a glimpse of a part tattoo on her lower back, but didn’t see what it was. She really, really wanted to find out.
Yep, Rachel really didn’t think Quinn had that in her.
They played more rock songs that night, and Rachel was as shocked as the other kids. She thought Quinn should stick to rock. It looked much better. Or maybe it was her exposed stomach that looked better.
When they were over, they came to the glee club table and talked loudly and started catching up. Rachel was immobile the whole time, sometimes with her mouth closed, sometimes it was open. She really tried to get over it, but it was hard. Her mind was filled with imaged of Quinn’s stomach, her navel piercing and her tongue going over that perfect part of the blonde’s body.
“You’re drooling.”
Rachel was brought back from her daydream by the girl of her thoughts, who was smirking at her.
“I didn’t know you were still interested in Noah.” Quin said after Rachel didn’t say anything.
“I’m not. You, on the other hand...” Rachel said, looking Quinn up and down.
“Really?”
“Oh My God, I said that out loud, didn’t I?” Rachel said, looking around to see if anybody had heard her. Fortunately, they hadn’t.
“Yes, you did.” Quinn said, moving her chair closer to Rachel, and putting her arm around the brunette.
“Can you just forget it ever happened. I think someone put something in my drink.” Rachel said, picking up her drink and looking at it to see if there something in there.
Quinn was smirking.
“I assume rock night is your favorite?” Quinn whispered in her ear, causing Rachel to blush. The brunette knew there was no way she would be able to deny anything to Quinn. And it’s not like she wanted to.
“You could say that, yes.” Rachel smiled at Quinn.
The blonde lay her head at the brunette’s shoulder and her hand enveloped the girl went to play with Rachel’s hair. They stayed that way for a while, looking at their friends talking, sometimes speaking as well. Puck kept sending knowing looks their way, which the girls ignored.
“Do you want to dance?” Quinn said so quietly, Rachel wasn’t so sure she had spoken at all. She turned to the blonde, who was looking at her. Quinn moved her hand and offered to Rachel, who took it in hers. the blonde stood up, and the brunette followed her.
They went to the middle of the dance floor. On the way, Quinn received several compliments and flirted. Rachel was not amused, but Quinn kept a smile on her face.
They started dancing, the bodies really close, making Rachel warm. Quinn was with one of her smirks. She pulled Rachel close.
“You not jealous of me flirting, are you Berry?” Quinn teased the girl. Rachel tried to move away from Quinn so she could be mad at her, but her bodies were too close, and the brunette just couldn’t think. “You should know they don’t stand a chance against you. We spent too much time not doing anything about ‘us’. It’s time we do.”
With that, Quinn kissed her. It took Rachel a while until she noticed that Quinn, Quinn Fabray, her high school crush, was kissing her. But she didn’t waste time when she did. She tangled one hand in the blonde hair and put the other on the girl’s hip, pushing her closer. She felt a tongue against her lips, and didn’t hesitate to let the girl in. They had to stop to breath, even though they didn’t want to.
It took they a while to regain their breaths, but when they did, they were both smiling.
“Puck was right, you are the best kisser.” Quinn broke the silence. They moved to the bar and Quinn ordered some water.
“How did you know?” Rachel asked. Quinn moved a hair strand that had fallen in front of her face and left her hand at the girl’s cheek.
“You kinda had a problem of being crazy whenever you where obsessed with someone. It wasn’t hard, really.”
“Why didn’t you do something about it?”
“Because I didn’t really know at the time. And I was waiting for you to make a move. You always did. I was hurt that you didn’t.” Quinn pouted.
“That was because with you, it was different. It is different.”
“I know, I’m a girl.”
“No, it wasn’t that. I felt different for you.” Rachel said, not wanting to say the word love just yet.
“Good. I do too.” Quinn said, kissing Rachel with all she had in her, expressing all her feeling through the kiss.