Fifty Shades of Crap: The snailmail project

[prettyh]

ETA: Temporarily public.

This is mainly for necromommycon's amusement, but for anyone else who has subjected themselves to the horror that is the E.L. James series of dubcon and terrible writing (or for those who were wise enough to avoid and just want a laugh), you can take a glimpse at what several of us have done to a copy of the heinous first installment

Comments

[necromommycon]

OMG, I love this post.

I came here to share this sentence: “Elizabeth walked slowly around her room, stopping to touch and examine some of her more treasured possessions: a turquoise and silver bracelet Todd had brought back for her from his last article she’d written for The Oracle.” I don't even know WHY; I just read that, and thought "H. needs this sentence in her life, STAT."

Someday we're going to create our own cracked-out answer to SVH, just as ridonculous and soap-opera-ish, but hopefully not set at a high school so there can be sex scenes.

[necromommycon]

...and I just saw the Cassie Clare edit. Crying with LOLs.

SHE'S EVERYWHERE

[prettyh]

WAIT, WHAT? WHERE?

Re: SHE'S EVERYWHERE

[necromommycon]

Someone has changed "Angel Clare" from Tess of the D'Urbervilles to Cassie Clare.

Worst. Rape. Ever.

Re: SHE'S EVERYWHERE

[prettyh]

Ahahahahaha! I hadn't caught that one! There is much debate in the margins about Tess; I'll have to make sure I upload every relevant picture.

Clary popped up yet again in my Entertainment Weekly magazine. I gagged and tore the page out.

MOAR PHOTOS (fixed, I hope)

[prettyh]

Edit: I do not know why some of these are STILL NOT UPRIGHT, but fine.
Edit the sequel: Fixed, maybe?

Also, feel free to share with the others who've contributed. :D

Re: MOAR PHOTOS

[necromommycon]

I will never be able to look at the Cirque de Soleil again without giggling.

The "zzzz"s at the end are killing me.

Re: MOAR PHOTOS (fixed, I hope)

[hippie_chick]

LOL "Cirque du Soleil". LOOOOOOL

LOL "ZZZZ" "ZZZZ" "ZZZZ"

This is awesome.

[prettyh]

LOLOLOL. I don't know why, either, but it's sort of making me want to read that damn book again. But I HATE YOU TODD.

We could set it in college, although calling it "SVU" might lend itself to more sex crimes than sexcapades... o.O

[necromommycon]

I *loved* that book. Those books. The whole mini-series or whatever it was called.

[prettyh]

...there are OTHERS?!? I thought it was a one-off! OH, DEAR. OH, NO. I don't think I have the strength to resist.

[prettyh]

Oh, ye gods, NOOOO, not THAT series! I did hear about the latter two Shades books, although I know nothing about them (for which I'm thankful) and have no clue how it all turns out (TEAM ETHAN).

Nae, I meant the all-grown-up-now Sweet Valley High book. Of which I thought there was only one! I read it in, like, a day. It was literary crack. AWESOME.

[hippie_chick]

Haha! I went back, re read and realized you're not talking "Fifty Shades" there so deleted. :)

[necromommycon]

There's a whole string of them! The bunch where Elizabeth might be going to jail, culminating in the trial, and then the evil twin, and the Return of the Evil Twin (or evil twin 2, or whatever it was called) with the evil girl's twin!
...I either need more or less caffeine. I can't tell which.