Bah...
Home life is getting nutty again... my Mom is on constant warpath. Two weeks ago she didn't talk to anyone for a week. This week? She's attacking me constantly.. It's pretty much retarded. I honestly can't handle her anymore, but I don't really know what to do.
If I leave, my poor brother and sister are stuck here. With them. My parents who obviously have killed all happiness for each other, and are now trying to spread their mission to everyone else. And, I am sure if I leave in a way my Mom doesn't "agree" with, she'll stop talking to me. She's threatened it enough damn times for me to get that she means it. Last time she kicked Al and I out, she wanted to go through every single box we packed to take out anything that she didn't think "belonged" to us, or that she had given us for gifts for Christmas or birthdays...
Want to know why she currently is so pissed at me? Because I haven't given her any money in two months, but she hasn't asked, or reminded me that I owe her SO much money. Best part? Went through the list of all the money that I owe her, and $120 isn't owed to her. Isn't that great? SO, after I prove that $120 of this owed money isn't owed to her, she FREAKS out on me and still is bitching about how I owe her so much money. Excuse me? I owe you maybe $150, and last time I checked, YOU PAY ME. So, if you're so concerned about the $150 I owe you, why haven't you been docking my pay? Oh, because I don't realize that this isn't about the money, it's about the fact that I owe her and don't care. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! See how everything is turned around? You can prove her wrong, and then that's not the reason why she was mad. She was also angry because Allen didn't go to work yesterday, and she had to. WHat the fuck? It's his job, if he wants to call off, he can. It's not any of your damned business.
Best part? I tried to give her the money, then she wouldn't take it. "I don't know what this is for. I need the list. I don't have a purse near by, so where am I supposed to put it? I don't even know how much this is." So, after all of her bitching, I try to give her JUST what she wanted, and then she doesn't want it because the circumstances are the circumstances she wants. And, quite frankly, I am not begging her to take what little fucking money I have.
My Dad is always on her side when she's attacking Al or I, because she isn't attacking him and he just wants her to not bitch at him. I want to rip his throat the fuck out. Mainly, he has no idea what's going on and wants to put his stupid, crazy two cents in. He never makes sense and I want to stab him. It's lovely.
I feel so goddamned trapped its unbelieveable. If I leave, I lose my family, my stuff, my wedding... it's fab! So, I sit here and take the abuse. Just take it...
If I leave, my poor brother and sister are stuck here. With them. My parents who obviously have killed all happiness for each other, and are now trying to spread their mission to everyone else. And, I am sure if I leave in a way my Mom doesn't "agree" with, she'll stop talking to me. She's threatened it enough damn times for me to get that she means it. Last time she kicked Al and I out, she wanted to go through every single box we packed to take out anything that she didn't think "belonged" to us, or that she had given us for gifts for Christmas or birthdays...
Want to know why she currently is so pissed at me? Because I haven't given her any money in two months, but she hasn't asked, or reminded me that I owe her SO much money. Best part? Went through the list of all the money that I owe her, and $120 isn't owed to her. Isn't that great? SO, after I prove that $120 of this owed money isn't owed to her, she FREAKS out on me and still is bitching about how I owe her so much money. Excuse me? I owe you maybe $150, and last time I checked, YOU PAY ME. So, if you're so concerned about the $150 I owe you, why haven't you been docking my pay? Oh, because I don't realize that this isn't about the money, it's about the fact that I owe her and don't care. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! See how everything is turned around? You can prove her wrong, and then that's not the reason why she was mad. She was also angry because Allen didn't go to work yesterday, and she had to. WHat the fuck? It's his job, if he wants to call off, he can. It's not any of your damned business.
Best part? I tried to give her the money, then she wouldn't take it. "I don't know what this is for. I need the list. I don't have a purse near by, so where am I supposed to put it? I don't even know how much this is." So, after all of her bitching, I try to give her JUST what she wanted, and then she doesn't want it because the circumstances are the circumstances she wants. And, quite frankly, I am not begging her to take what little fucking money I have.
My Dad is always on her side when she's attacking Al or I, because she isn't attacking him and he just wants her to not bitch at him. I want to rip his throat the fuck out. Mainly, he has no idea what's going on and wants to put his stupid, crazy two cents in. He never makes sense and I want to stab him. It's lovely.
I feel so goddamned trapped its unbelieveable. If I leave, I lose my family, my stuff, my wedding... it's fab! So, I sit here and take the abuse. Just take it...