Another block of entries...
19 July 2008
LVK
20:00
Dinner starts now. I went to Hubli with Irene and Violet to pick up the third Italian, Verusca, who I like very much. She’s what I would call a true Bohemian and a kindred spirit at that. I will have an amazing time getting to know her better.
I haven’t spoken with anyone in a while now. Like 3 days I think. The last I talked to someone, my sister Susie, I found out that my dad had a heart attack. He’s in the hospital and appears to be fine. It was minor. But it’s still quite troubling for me, obviously. Especially since neither of my parents know that I know. They apparently decided that it’d be best not to tell any of us kids who aren’t at home (everyone but Mike and Susie) because they didn’t want to worry us. Luckily for me, I called Susie’s cell instead of the house phone so I got the DL. I’m beyond upset by this ridiculously idiotic thought process on their part. Maybe I am thinking of this differently than others but he’s my father!!! MY FATHER!!! His life is a part of my life! If there is something wrong I should know immediately and so should John, Grant, Lyndi, and Peter. I wonder how my parents would feel if they found out after the fact from a third person on accident that I was hospitalized for a serious illness. Maybe I’ll keep that in mind should it ever happen. I’m sure they wouldn’t share the same sentiments they seem to have now. How truly asinine. Seriously.
So I’ve just been trying to cope…without getting to speak to my parents. I’ve been reading a lot (when I say reading I mean the Book of Mormon…it’s all I’ve read since I’ve been here in India). Also, praying. Things will be fine, I know. I have faith that Heavenly Father will take care of my family. But, I still wish I could be there. I wish I could see them. I wish there was some way for me to help.
I had chocolate today for the first time in 3 weeks. It was sinful it was so good. I was so happy there were no words. It was exactly the worldly comfort I needed after the news of my dad. Also, the saree and toe rings have been purchased and are AMAZING.
Now, dinner and more introspection. I’d like Ilang to call me very much.
20 July 2008
LVK
18:03
I just got back to LVK from another round of village visits. I really wasn’t in the mood this morning but I’m so glad that I went. First I got to see some manifestations of religious divisions on everyday Indian life. Then I got to conduct my first interview with the Lambanis in Mundgod. The ladies are amazing. Lambanis are a fascinating people.
Oh! And I finally got my biscuits! Parle-G are the single greatest biscuits ever made. Don’t buy chocolate biscuits in India if you are a true appreciator of chocolate. Indian chocolate anything tastes a little different. It’s not a rich, creamy goodness like I prefer. They’ve definitely tainted the chocolate with something else. I’ll probably just be eating biscuits for the next few meals. Haha. They’re just that good. Ahhhh, this all makes sense. Parle-G is a company started in Geneva and Paris. That’s why they’re so good. I just wish there was milk worth drinking around here but I guess we can’t have everything we want.
I’m beginning to think there might be something wrong with my mobile. Either that or my closest friends and family just don’t want to talk to me. I haven’t heard from a soul, nor have I been able to reach anyone, for 4 days now. That’s the longest time I think I’ve ever gone without talking to someone in my inner circle or whatever I call it.
I have a ton of photos to sort and an hour or so of interviews to transcribe so I can start putting things together for my Tanner Presentation. I have some really good thoughts going around in my head right now so I’m gonna keep developing it.
23 July 2008
LVK
18:01
Slumber party with the Italians at Verusca’s room in Jyoti Convent last night. Those girls are so much fun. I’m so grateful that they’re here otherwise this would be a lot more lonely of an experience. Haha. I think I need to go to Italy to visit them sometime…Spring Break maybe…? Anyone interested?
You know what’s great? Indian incense. And Indian rooms with no smoke detectors. I’m going to Goa with Violet and Pash next weekend. That’s going to be quite the adventure, I can already tell. Goa is amazing. We’re going to Penjim which is the capital. I’m excited to really explore my first real Indian city. Also, it will be cool to see a different part of India. I’ve basically explored the intricate details of all of Northern Karnataka so Goa will be quite different. I’m really just trying to get the most out of this experience as I can before it’s over and I then who knows if I’ll ever be back.
First night back at Wellesley I say we all screw unpacking and instead pass out watching Romeo + Juliet. I have totally been craving that movie. Plus I’d rather spend time with you girls then be sleeping and unpacking in my room. Guys are invited too if they want to make the trek out to the Swelles from Cambridge/Boston.
Also, Brooke, you MUST come to Boston this year. I don’t care how but it has to happen! I had a dream about it yesterday. It will be glorious!
24 July 2008
LVK
08:53
Buahahahahahahaha! I finally FINALLY got a hold of Brandon last night! Wow, was it glorious to talk to him again. Two years of waiting and it was well worth it…he’s still as FAN-tastic as ever! I’m so excited for this coming school year for the following reasons:
1. My classes are interesting but luckily not too demanding.
2. I have an amazing boyfriend who I plan on visiting often.
3. Ilang
4. Brandon
5. Kirsten
6. Sheila
7. Martha’s back from Paris!
8. Pete is still at West Point so muchos adventuros (haha) will be happening.
9. Generally, my life is amazing.
Anyway, I’m in a fabulous mood. India has been good to me. Even though my hair is a disaster (the water here is horrible and I need a haircut something fierce). But other than that, and the flip flop tan line on my feet, life is great! I can’t wait to come back to America and Boston and Wellesley and LIFE! It’s like this summer has been a soul searching expedition and now I get to take what I’ve found and bring it back to reality and I can’t even explain how wonderful things will be when that happens.
I have some errands to run today - pick up my saree and pants from the tailor, pick up my train ticket to Goa, wash laundry, fill out CWS forms. I think I’ll read some more scriptures then head out and start checking things off my list. Pash is still in Mainalli. I think he should be coming back today but I’m not sure. Maybe I’ll call him. I have no clue what lays on the agenda from now ‘til Goa.
25 July 2008
LVK
06:21
I woke up at 04:17. To say I ‘woke up’ is a bit of an exaggeration because it implies that I was ever truly sleeping. I basically had no sleep last night because my bed was under attack from all sides. Ants. I hate ants. Anyway, it finally got too ridiculous so I just got up and started reading, showering, randomly looking through photo albums on my computer…whatever, to pass the morning. I stripped the bed and am washing everything today and then I’m going to try to reposition the bed to what I hope will be a less compromising position. Ants are hard to beat though ‘cuz they can crawl on everything so it doesn’t really help to be away from the wall or off of the ground. The only other solution I can think of is to try tucking in my mosquito net all the way around the bed every night after I get in. Though for some reason I still doubt that will stop them. Annoying little buggers.
I had an amazing phone conversation with Will yesterday. We didn’t necessarily talk about anything spectacular or worth note (except Kir’s upcoming baptism!!!!) but I was just in such a good mood and he made me laugh and talking to him always makes me happy. He flies home (to the U.S.) today. I think he’s probably in the air already. Hmmm, I wonder if he reads this? I don’t think I gave him the URL but then again it is on my facebook profile so it’s not like it’d be too difficult to stumble upon it…*shrug* doesn’t really matter. It’s not like my life and thoughts are some secret I keep from him. Haha. I’ll ask him next time he calls.
Random things I’ve been thinking about lately that I need to eventually check out once I can spend some real time on the internet:
1. Wintersession Plans - India, Europe, Jamaica, Boston, Idaho…??? What will I do?
2. Spring Break - I’ve had a lot of thoughts about this. I keep thinking Europe. But we’ll see. That’s still quite a ways down the road.
Wow, interruption to my thoughts…my stomach does not feel good. I’ve been trying to eat a little lighter. No meats. NONE. Only small amounts of sauces since they’re so spicy. Basically I eat white rice. Why do I still not feel well? I guess this is part of the game. I don’t know. Also, there is a bird or a monkey or something outside my window and it makes the most obnoxious high pitched squealing sound. Despite all these things I’m actually still in good spirits. I feel so good. It’s amazing what it does to take a little time to focus on myself and get myself back in line with the lifestyle I should have been living more exactly all along. I feel like I’m overflowing with gratitude all the time. Everything has a silver lining and there’s always something more to learn about the complex beauty of life. Especially when I read the Book of Mormon I feel so grateful. I always learn new things about my Heavenly Father and His love for me. It’s amazing. Life is amazing. Haha. I wish you could all be here to enjoy this moment and these feelings. But then I guess if everyone was here it wouldn’t be the same opportunity for introspection. Anyway,
3. Thanksgiving Break - I usually go down to DC to visit the grandparents but last year I ended up in NYC at the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade which was fun. So I guess my options are really open. Also, Thanksgiving might end up being the same day as my 22nd birthday. It’s either on my birthday or exactly a week after, I’m not sure. I’m not sure whether it’d be bad or good for it to be the same day. If it’s the week before then I definitely get to celebrate with my friends which didn’t happen last year because of Thanksgiving Break. But, if it’s the day of Thanksgiving then I’ll get to spend it with my family which hasn’t happened since I was 18 living back at home. Either way this is probably what I should look into first since it’s approaching the soonest. Post if you have any suggestions about this or the previous two.
Merci beaucoup.
25 July 2008
LVK
07:10
This is only meant for those who understand it…sorry.
WHY ARE THESE BOMBS EVEN HERE?!?!?!?!?!??!?!
25 July 2008
LVK
11:36
Ha, it’s my third LJ post for the day and it’s not even noon yet. I’ve cleaned my room, ate my breakfast, plucked my eyebrows. I even put on make up for the first time in four weeks! It feels good to feel like I look pretty. Then I went out into the town to buy some Parle-G’s and I got lost. Haha. I eventually found my way back but I have to admit I was a little scared for a second. 1. Because I don’t speak the language so asking for directions was going to be difficult, and 2. Because I’m very obviously foreign and everyone on the street is paying attention to me so to appear lost would only make me a bigger target than I already am. But, besides three twenty-something guys following me from sweet shop to sweet shop looking for Parle-G goodness, everything worked out fine. I’ll just have to be more cognizant next time I go out. The problem is that the streets aren’t really straight. They snake in and out of one another and you will think that you’re walking straight and staying on the same road but actually you’re on a different road now. And there aren’t any road signs so it’s hard to know where you are unless you know the shops, etc. Anyway, a little scary but nothing bad happened and it only helped me explore and get to know the town better.
Also, when it’s raining it’s generally a horrible idea to go out. The roads are disgusting (even more so than usual) because not only are they covered in cow manure but now it’s wet and muddy and you can’t avoid the cow manure. Ugh. Gross. Anyway, it washes off.
I feel like I should do something productive today but all my usual options are limited because of the rain. Oh, and it was a monkey. Sightings confirm. The little squealer came up to my window looking for a way out of the rain. I now have 5 wall geckos and a monkey living as my neighbors and friends. Haha. I got rid of the huge cockroach. You and I both no that wasn’t going to last long.
I think I’ll try to power through some things on my Tanner Presentation so I can walk through my thoughts with Pash before he leaves the country. Blah blah blah. I’m a little bit bored for the first time in four weeks. Wow. You can’t really complain about that.
27 July 2008
Tibetan Colony Internet Cafe
16:49
Violet's boyfriend Daniel is here. He came yesterday to surprise her. I'm happy for her because it makes her happy. Though I'm not so happy for myself. Haha. Daniel is American...from LA and he's an expatriot to India. He is a musician and teaches yoga and travels around getting in tune with himself or something. I find him a little grating. But I'm trying to stay positive so I just think about other things. We came to the Tibetan Colony to see the temples and enjoy the surroundings. I love this place very much.
We went to the new temple that was dedicated in January. It's gorgeous and serine. I love it. I like to go there just to think. It's as close as I can get to a sanctuary around here. It's clean and quite and beautiful. I sat for about an hour or so and thought about life. It's so refreshing to contemplate life. I never took time to do such things back home. I'm really learning so much about myself and what I want for my life and how I was to proceed with everything when I get back to the U.S. I feel so good. All the time I feel happy for no reason except that why shouldn't I be happy?
Anyway, life is good...so good.
Peace.
LVK
20:00
Dinner starts now. I went to Hubli with Irene and Violet to pick up the third Italian, Verusca, who I like very much. She’s what I would call a true Bohemian and a kindred spirit at that. I will have an amazing time getting to know her better.
I haven’t spoken with anyone in a while now. Like 3 days I think. The last I talked to someone, my sister Susie, I found out that my dad had a heart attack. He’s in the hospital and appears to be fine. It was minor. But it’s still quite troubling for me, obviously. Especially since neither of my parents know that I know. They apparently decided that it’d be best not to tell any of us kids who aren’t at home (everyone but Mike and Susie) because they didn’t want to worry us. Luckily for me, I called Susie’s cell instead of the house phone so I got the DL. I’m beyond upset by this ridiculously idiotic thought process on their part. Maybe I am thinking of this differently than others but he’s my father!!! MY FATHER!!! His life is a part of my life! If there is something wrong I should know immediately and so should John, Grant, Lyndi, and Peter. I wonder how my parents would feel if they found out after the fact from a third person on accident that I was hospitalized for a serious illness. Maybe I’ll keep that in mind should it ever happen. I’m sure they wouldn’t share the same sentiments they seem to have now. How truly asinine. Seriously.
So I’ve just been trying to cope…without getting to speak to my parents. I’ve been reading a lot (when I say reading I mean the Book of Mormon…it’s all I’ve read since I’ve been here in India). Also, praying. Things will be fine, I know. I have faith that Heavenly Father will take care of my family. But, I still wish I could be there. I wish I could see them. I wish there was some way for me to help.
I had chocolate today for the first time in 3 weeks. It was sinful it was so good. I was so happy there were no words. It was exactly the worldly comfort I needed after the news of my dad. Also, the saree and toe rings have been purchased and are AMAZING.
Now, dinner and more introspection. I’d like Ilang to call me very much.
20 July 2008
LVK
18:03
I just got back to LVK from another round of village visits. I really wasn’t in the mood this morning but I’m so glad that I went. First I got to see some manifestations of religious divisions on everyday Indian life. Then I got to conduct my first interview with the Lambanis in Mundgod. The ladies are amazing. Lambanis are a fascinating people.
Oh! And I finally got my biscuits! Parle-G are the single greatest biscuits ever made. Don’t buy chocolate biscuits in India if you are a true appreciator of chocolate. Indian chocolate anything tastes a little different. It’s not a rich, creamy goodness like I prefer. They’ve definitely tainted the chocolate with something else. I’ll probably just be eating biscuits for the next few meals. Haha. They’re just that good. Ahhhh, this all makes sense. Parle-G is a company started in Geneva and Paris. That’s why they’re so good. I just wish there was milk worth drinking around here but I guess we can’t have everything we want.
I’m beginning to think there might be something wrong with my mobile. Either that or my closest friends and family just don’t want to talk to me. I haven’t heard from a soul, nor have I been able to reach anyone, for 4 days now. That’s the longest time I think I’ve ever gone without talking to someone in my inner circle or whatever I call it.
I have a ton of photos to sort and an hour or so of interviews to transcribe so I can start putting things together for my Tanner Presentation. I have some really good thoughts going around in my head right now so I’m gonna keep developing it.
23 July 2008
LVK
18:01
Slumber party with the Italians at Verusca’s room in Jyoti Convent last night. Those girls are so much fun. I’m so grateful that they’re here otherwise this would be a lot more lonely of an experience. Haha. I think I need to go to Italy to visit them sometime…Spring Break maybe…? Anyone interested?
You know what’s great? Indian incense. And Indian rooms with no smoke detectors. I’m going to Goa with Violet and Pash next weekend. That’s going to be quite the adventure, I can already tell. Goa is amazing. We’re going to Penjim which is the capital. I’m excited to really explore my first real Indian city. Also, it will be cool to see a different part of India. I’ve basically explored the intricate details of all of Northern Karnataka so Goa will be quite different. I’m really just trying to get the most out of this experience as I can before it’s over and I then who knows if I’ll ever be back.
First night back at Wellesley I say we all screw unpacking and instead pass out watching Romeo + Juliet. I have totally been craving that movie. Plus I’d rather spend time with you girls then be sleeping and unpacking in my room. Guys are invited too if they want to make the trek out to the Swelles from Cambridge/Boston.
Also, Brooke, you MUST come to Boston this year. I don’t care how but it has to happen! I had a dream about it yesterday. It will be glorious!
24 July 2008
LVK
08:53
Buahahahahahahaha! I finally FINALLY got a hold of Brandon last night! Wow, was it glorious to talk to him again. Two years of waiting and it was well worth it…he’s still as FAN-tastic as ever! I’m so excited for this coming school year for the following reasons:
1. My classes are interesting but luckily not too demanding.
2. I have an amazing boyfriend who I plan on visiting often.
3. Ilang
4. Brandon
5. Kirsten
6. Sheila
7. Martha’s back from Paris!
8. Pete is still at West Point so muchos adventuros (haha) will be happening.
9. Generally, my life is amazing.
Anyway, I’m in a fabulous mood. India has been good to me. Even though my hair is a disaster (the water here is horrible and I need a haircut something fierce). But other than that, and the flip flop tan line on my feet, life is great! I can’t wait to come back to America and Boston and Wellesley and LIFE! It’s like this summer has been a soul searching expedition and now I get to take what I’ve found and bring it back to reality and I can’t even explain how wonderful things will be when that happens.
I have some errands to run today - pick up my saree and pants from the tailor, pick up my train ticket to Goa, wash laundry, fill out CWS forms. I think I’ll read some more scriptures then head out and start checking things off my list. Pash is still in Mainalli. I think he should be coming back today but I’m not sure. Maybe I’ll call him. I have no clue what lays on the agenda from now ‘til Goa.
25 July 2008
LVK
06:21
I woke up at 04:17. To say I ‘woke up’ is a bit of an exaggeration because it implies that I was ever truly sleeping. I basically had no sleep last night because my bed was under attack from all sides. Ants. I hate ants. Anyway, it finally got too ridiculous so I just got up and started reading, showering, randomly looking through photo albums on my computer…whatever, to pass the morning. I stripped the bed and am washing everything today and then I’m going to try to reposition the bed to what I hope will be a less compromising position. Ants are hard to beat though ‘cuz they can crawl on everything so it doesn’t really help to be away from the wall or off of the ground. The only other solution I can think of is to try tucking in my mosquito net all the way around the bed every night after I get in. Though for some reason I still doubt that will stop them. Annoying little buggers.
I had an amazing phone conversation with Will yesterday. We didn’t necessarily talk about anything spectacular or worth note (except Kir’s upcoming baptism!!!!) but I was just in such a good mood and he made me laugh and talking to him always makes me happy. He flies home (to the U.S.) today. I think he’s probably in the air already. Hmmm, I wonder if he reads this? I don’t think I gave him the URL but then again it is on my facebook profile so it’s not like it’d be too difficult to stumble upon it…*shrug* doesn’t really matter. It’s not like my life and thoughts are some secret I keep from him. Haha. I’ll ask him next time he calls.
Random things I’ve been thinking about lately that I need to eventually check out once I can spend some real time on the internet:
1. Wintersession Plans - India, Europe, Jamaica, Boston, Idaho…??? What will I do?
2. Spring Break - I’ve had a lot of thoughts about this. I keep thinking Europe. But we’ll see. That’s still quite a ways down the road.
Wow, interruption to my thoughts…my stomach does not feel good. I’ve been trying to eat a little lighter. No meats. NONE. Only small amounts of sauces since they’re so spicy. Basically I eat white rice. Why do I still not feel well? I guess this is part of the game. I don’t know. Also, there is a bird or a monkey or something outside my window and it makes the most obnoxious high pitched squealing sound. Despite all these things I’m actually still in good spirits. I feel so good. It’s amazing what it does to take a little time to focus on myself and get myself back in line with the lifestyle I should have been living more exactly all along. I feel like I’m overflowing with gratitude all the time. Everything has a silver lining and there’s always something more to learn about the complex beauty of life. Especially when I read the Book of Mormon I feel so grateful. I always learn new things about my Heavenly Father and His love for me. It’s amazing. Life is amazing. Haha. I wish you could all be here to enjoy this moment and these feelings. But then I guess if everyone was here it wouldn’t be the same opportunity for introspection. Anyway,
3. Thanksgiving Break - I usually go down to DC to visit the grandparents but last year I ended up in NYC at the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade which was fun. So I guess my options are really open. Also, Thanksgiving might end up being the same day as my 22nd birthday. It’s either on my birthday or exactly a week after, I’m not sure. I’m not sure whether it’d be bad or good for it to be the same day. If it’s the week before then I definitely get to celebrate with my friends which didn’t happen last year because of Thanksgiving Break. But, if it’s the day of Thanksgiving then I’ll get to spend it with my family which hasn’t happened since I was 18 living back at home. Either way this is probably what I should look into first since it’s approaching the soonest. Post if you have any suggestions about this or the previous two.
Merci beaucoup.
25 July 2008
LVK
07:10
This is only meant for those who understand it…sorry.
WHY ARE THESE BOMBS EVEN HERE?!?!?!?!?!??!?!
25 July 2008
LVK
11:36
Ha, it’s my third LJ post for the day and it’s not even noon yet. I’ve cleaned my room, ate my breakfast, plucked my eyebrows. I even put on make up for the first time in four weeks! It feels good to feel like I look pretty. Then I went out into the town to buy some Parle-G’s and I got lost. Haha. I eventually found my way back but I have to admit I was a little scared for a second. 1. Because I don’t speak the language so asking for directions was going to be difficult, and 2. Because I’m very obviously foreign and everyone on the street is paying attention to me so to appear lost would only make me a bigger target than I already am. But, besides three twenty-something guys following me from sweet shop to sweet shop looking for Parle-G goodness, everything worked out fine. I’ll just have to be more cognizant next time I go out. The problem is that the streets aren’t really straight. They snake in and out of one another and you will think that you’re walking straight and staying on the same road but actually you’re on a different road now. And there aren’t any road signs so it’s hard to know where you are unless you know the shops, etc. Anyway, a little scary but nothing bad happened and it only helped me explore and get to know the town better.
Also, when it’s raining it’s generally a horrible idea to go out. The roads are disgusting (even more so than usual) because not only are they covered in cow manure but now it’s wet and muddy and you can’t avoid the cow manure. Ugh. Gross. Anyway, it washes off.
I feel like I should do something productive today but all my usual options are limited because of the rain. Oh, and it was a monkey. Sightings confirm. The little squealer came up to my window looking for a way out of the rain. I now have 5 wall geckos and a monkey living as my neighbors and friends. Haha. I got rid of the huge cockroach. You and I both no that wasn’t going to last long.
I think I’ll try to power through some things on my Tanner Presentation so I can walk through my thoughts with Pash before he leaves the country. Blah blah blah. I’m a little bit bored for the first time in four weeks. Wow. You can’t really complain about that.
27 July 2008
Tibetan Colony Internet Cafe
16:49
Violet's boyfriend Daniel is here. He came yesterday to surprise her. I'm happy for her because it makes her happy. Though I'm not so happy for myself. Haha. Daniel is American...from LA and he's an expatriot to India. He is a musician and teaches yoga and travels around getting in tune with himself or something. I find him a little grating. But I'm trying to stay positive so I just think about other things. We came to the Tibetan Colony to see the temples and enjoy the surroundings. I love this place very much.
We went to the new temple that was dedicated in January. It's gorgeous and serine. I love it. I like to go there just to think. It's as close as I can get to a sanctuary around here. It's clean and quite and beautiful. I sat for about an hour or so and thought about life. It's so refreshing to contemplate life. I never took time to do such things back home. I'm really learning so much about myself and what I want for my life and how I was to proceed with everything when I get back to the U.S. I feel so good. All the time I feel happy for no reason except that why shouldn't I be happy?
Anyway, life is good...so good.
Peace.