ARCHBITCH OF CANTERBURY
DARLING CONGREGATION, a warm good evening and a sticky pudding welcome to every single one of you. I cannot express how wonderful it is to see every single one of your lovely, pretty faces. Reverend ladytiferet and I were so happy to see such intent mass participation last week when the Sunday Service reared again into action like an engine of a vintage muscle car. It was a gorgeous and thrilling sight to behold.
You all deserve a round of applause.
WELL DONE, ALL OF YOU, WELL DONE.
BE IT FICCING, BE IT FLAILING, COMMENT-PORNING, PROPOSITIONING FELLOW MEMBERS OF THE CONGREGATION. YOU HAVE ALL DONE BRILLIANTLY.
I couldn't help but notice quite a few bright faces, you know who you are, oh new mass-attendants. I hope you enjoy the sermons and come back again. Please make yourselves at home in the parish. Flock, make them feel welcome. That is, after all, what we do. Preach and devirginise.
PREVIOUS WEEKS:
The First Sunday Service
The Second Sunday Service
The Third Sunday Service
The FourthSunday Service
The Fifth Sunday Service
The Sixth Sunday Service
The Seventh Sunday Service
Last Week's Sunday Service
>
AU
Prompt
Esca/Marcus - Drunken Vegas Wedding
Esca and Marcus wake up in Vegas, in a bed, naked, with wedding bands on their fingers (bonus points if they are Cladagh rings :) and only vague recollections of the previous night and what got them there
it would be awesome if they know of each other but arent exactly fond of the other and if there is a reason they had to stay married for a certain amount of time
what can I say, I love love/hate relationship and clichés :P
FILLED ONCE: interpol15 whom I might or might not have stalked since I saw her genius prompts over at the kmm, broked her vow of silence and joined with this lovely little mini-fill Woke-up Married vague, cleaned-up mini-fill
FILLED TWICE: lalazee honestly deserves an award for her steadfast valiant conduct, she is like the crusading knight, bringing rescue consisting of banter and pissy Esca in our darkest hour This Is Going To Become A Habit
Prompt 4
Esca/Marcus, D/s AU
Esca is a Dom who likes being fucked, Marcus is a sub who likes pleasing his master.
FILLED ONCE: Cardinal naninande has took the bait and started a wonderful snippet and SHE FUCKING BETTER CONTINUE OR I SWEAR I'LL DRAG HER THROUGH OUR CHURCH. BY HER HAIR. D/S 'verse snippets (Cardinal, you better write some porn for this one, we don't want the situation getting on the wrong side of sticky like on the last conclave)
FILLED TWICE: Bishop lulahbelle oh how one can count on her, whenever there's need for smouldering intense porn oh she is ever so keen to please the congregation and you can find it here
>
1) Esca/Marcus - matchmaking Placidus
the wonderful temperance_k asked for:
Since I'm 50~ pages away from finishing the book, I've been tortured by many prompts. NONE OF THEM are as appealing as inadvertent matchmaking!Placidus.
It's pretty much canon, I could QUOTE it at you, and so please, anons, I would like Placidus' snide remarks continually forcing Esca and Marcus together until they really are together, and Placidus' complete and utter horror at realizing what he has done. Double bonus points for Marcus and Esca being pretty oblivious throughout.
2) Esca/Marcus, military AU
Marcus is an American officer on loan to the British military, assigned to temporarily lead a special forces squad and bring them up to date on American techniques and procedures. One of the soldiers, Esca, is not too happy about a Yankee telling him what to do.
Bonus points for Esca's polite "yessirs" while he's glaring, seething with rage or smirking.
More bonus points if Marcus's attempts to put Esca in his place end up with Esca topping the hell out of him (he can top from the bottom, I don't mind).
Even more bonus points for the use of military equipment and weaponry during sex.
) Esca/Marcus- AU, druid!Esca
Can be bookverse or movieverse, but I would like Esca to be both a warrior and a druid, a keeper of the tribe's traditions. Suppose he managed to keep his druidic powers secret, unlike being the chieftain's son, warrior elite etc, etc. But somewhere post-book/movie, while they're all happily farming, something terrible happens, animals dying, no crops, horrible weather, or Marcus gets really sick, whatever you like. And Esca is suddenly very fierce and BAMF and performing obscure bloody rituals, maybe tattooing Marcus to ward of evil spirits... It's all very mysterious and Marcus is promptly smitten. Or even more smitten than before. You know. Maybe Esca needs to fuck Marcus in Stonehenge to prevent the end of the world.
4) Esca/Marcus, anger issues, stand-off
Marcus has a temper and anger issues.
Esca is the only one who doesn't back down or back off.
Bonus points if Esca is still a slave.
I absolutely adore this, cause it has so much potential for wonderful and spot-on characterization while still being quite short and general. There seem to be quite a few fics out there with Marcus as the 'sappiest Master ever' but, I am of the fraction that things might not have been as rosy.
5) Esca/Marcus, Roman AU, powerful Esca
I'd like to read about Esca being in a position of power in the Roman empire, in spite of his ethnic background (is it even historically possible? it should be, it's an AU - maybe he's an emissary or a South-North Relations consultant, or an auxilia officer who got promoted for something extraordinary, IDEK, sorry :)), while Marcus is still an active military commander.
6) Esca/Marcus, modern AU, suicidal!Esca, hitman!Marcus, angst&violence
Esca wants to die (reasons up to the author), but he wants an honorable death (as far as it's possible) so he uses a middleman to contract a hit on himself.Marcus is a recognized professional, he always researches his targets thoroughly, so he knows that his target wants to die but will fight to his last breath.
Cue respect, guys bonding while trying to kill each other, and a happy ending :)Bonus points if Esca has some kind of a military (or similar) background and will pose some challenge for Marcus.
7) Esca/Marcus - massage & frotting
While Esca is still slave he's instructed to massage Marcus's bad leg. Marcus (who is wearing no trousers/leggings) lies on his stomach on the table while Esca massages him. Eventually the tension and UST builds between them until one day Esca's hands move further up, massaging Marcus's ass, etc, and that leads to frotting (either against each other or Marcus rubbing off against the table while Esca massages him).
8) Esca/Marcus/Esca, magical threesome
Happy (Pre-)Gay Farmers era.
Tired with all the hard work, Esca wishes there were two of him. Both he and Marcus are shocked then the wish is fulfilled. The new Esca is exactly the same as the old one and they get along splendidly, work, hunt and sleep together in a perfect unison. After a couple of days they begin to notice Marcus's foul mood. They come to a conclusion that he feels left out and lonely.
Cue both Escas seducing Marcus and making him feel wanted and needed :)
OH ALL YE FAITHFUL, this week it was up to Reverend ladytiferet to pick two canon prompts and for my humble humble self, to choose those of the alternate variety. We cannot help but hope that there is something for everyone in this week's Service and that donation will tumble, aplenty, onto the altar steps.
Prompt 1
Esca/Marcus - movieverse, hate-sex
What it says on the tin - true, rough, merciless hatesex with Marcus and Esca seeing each other as equals and trying to get the upper hand.
They are both frustrated and hate each other and themselves for how much they care about the other, even though the other doesn't deserve it... Standard drill there :)
I don't care who ends up bottoming, Although I would appreciate the result to be kind a draw with both of them losing/winning :)
JUST LIKE BACARDI MOJITO AND COSMOPOLITAN THIS PROMPT IS A TRUE CANON CLASSIC. WE ALL KNOW THAT THOSE SMOULDERING LOOKS ESCA AND MARCUS WOULD EVENTUALLY END UP IN BACKS HITTING WALLS AND THOSE OLDE ROMAN SHELVES GROWING RAGGEDY WITH THOSE FRANTIC THRUSTS AGAINST THEM. THIS HAS SO MUCH POTENTION FOR BRAIN-BURNING HOTNESS AND RAW, UNCOUTH, RAKING TENDERNESS.
I GET DREAMY-EYED JUST THINKING ABOUT IT GOD.
Prompt 2
Esca/Marcus, movieverse, blindfold
Esca is a more dominant person in their relationship on any given day, but once in a while he needs to relinquish control, so he lets Marcus blindfold him.
Bonus points for confident, authoritative, but calm and caring Marcus.
!!!!!!!
Prompt
Esca/Marcus, due south AU
Marcus first came to england on the trail of the killers and besmirchers of his father and for reasons that don't need exploring at this juncture, he has remained attached as liaison to Scotland Yard.
Bonuses for: Cradoc as Vecchio, Esca as Kowalski, Aquila as his uncle's ghost, who visits him on lieu of his dad, who's been missing in ghostland for a while, and Esca having a dance step rug in his apartment and a gossipy landlady who tells Marcus everything about his habits.
AHAHAHAHA I REFUSED TO INFORM THE OTHER REVEREND ABOUT THIS PROMPT LOL. BUT SINCE YOU HAD TO BE UNDER A ROCK IN ORDER NOT TO HEAR ME MOANING ABOUT TIF MOVING TO CANADA, I SIMPLY *HAD* TO REQUEST SOMETHING INCLUDING CANADIAN MOUNTIES. TO EASE THE PAIN, FLOCK, TO EASE THE PAIN.
Look at me, Reverend. My heart is in tatters, you have left me here, in woe, like an ill-begotten maiden, next time you see me I'll be drinking absynth oot the bottle and fucking talentless poets! MARK MY WORDS, REVEREND TIF FOR WOE IS ME.
ANYWAY I HOPE YOU'LL ENJOY THIS PROMPT IF IT IS INDEED FILLED.
Prompt 4
Esca/Marcus, Modern AU, kissing booth
Marcus and Esca meet at a kissing booth. Sparks fly.
Yes, I just watched She's The Man. :D
THIS PROMPT HAS BEEN SUGGESTED BY OUR KEEN, OH EVER SO KEEN, ALTAR GIRL ninja_orange AND WHO ARE WE TO DENY HER? IT'S SIMPLE YET IT'S SIZZLING.
who else but the amazing, the wondrous, the utterly lovely lalazee to fill this prompt? And of course she has in the sizzling Worth More Than a Dollar and filled for the second time, by the lovely lulahbelle in her slightly darker Lift Me UP
I hope that you have genuinely enjoyed our prompts for this
evening and that they will serve to please you in the most carnal of ways.
As always we are very open to everyone; old and new, for next week's Service or just let us know of things more general, do not hesitate to contact us via PM, email, a pigeon or a long distance hamster and we shall respond to you with spectacular promptness.
Always remember to SIN BOLDLY
We remain,
Your Obedient Servants in Porn,
The Reverends
GOD SPEED, FAITHFUL ONES, GOD SPEED.
oh and I would have forgotten, the Libernalia sign-ups are now open. I know a lot of you are busy writing your Big Bangs, but for those who do not this might a more apprealing option, with 1K minimum it's doable in a couple of afternoons ;)
take part in the eagle_exchange and Sign Up
YOUR CHURCH NEEDS YOU.
You all deserve a round of applause.
WELL DONE, ALL OF YOU, WELL DONE.
BE IT FICCING, BE IT FLAILING, COMMENT-PORNING, PROPOSITIONING FELLOW MEMBERS OF THE CONGREGATION. YOU HAVE ALL DONE BRILLIANTLY.
I couldn't help but notice quite a few bright faces, you know who you are, oh new mass-attendants. I hope you enjoy the sermons and come back again. Please make yourselves at home in the parish. Flock, make them feel welcome. That is, after all, what we do. Preach and devirginise.
PREVIOUS WEEKS:
The First Sunday Service
The Second Sunday Service
The Third Sunday Service
The FourthSunday Service
The Fifth Sunday Service
The Sixth Sunday Service
The Seventh Sunday Service
Last Week's Sunday Service
>
AU
Prompt
Esca/Marcus - Drunken Vegas Wedding
Esca and Marcus wake up in Vegas, in a bed, naked, with wedding bands on their fingers (bonus points if they are Cladagh rings :) and only vague recollections of the previous night and what got them there
it would be awesome if they know of each other but arent exactly fond of the other and if there is a reason they had to stay married for a certain amount of time
what can I say, I love love/hate relationship and clichés :P
FILLED ONCE: interpol15 whom I might or might not have stalked since I saw her genius prompts over at the kmm, broked her vow of silence and joined with this lovely little mini-fill Woke-up Married vague, cleaned-up mini-fill
FILLED TWICE: lalazee honestly deserves an award for her steadfast valiant conduct, she is like the crusading knight, bringing rescue consisting of banter and pissy Esca in our darkest hour This Is Going To Become A Habit
Prompt 4
Esca/Marcus, D/s AU
Esca is a Dom who likes being fucked, Marcus is a sub who likes pleasing his master.
FILLED ONCE: Cardinal naninande has took the bait and started a wonderful snippet and SHE FUCKING BETTER CONTINUE OR I SWEAR I'LL DRAG HER THROUGH OUR CHURCH. BY HER HAIR. D/S 'verse snippets (Cardinal, you better write some porn for this one, we don't want the situation getting on the wrong side of sticky like on the last conclave)
FILLED TWICE: Bishop lulahbelle oh how one can count on her, whenever there's need for smouldering intense porn oh she is ever so keen to please the congregation and you can find it here
>
1) Esca/Marcus - matchmaking Placidus
the wonderful temperance_k asked for:
Since I'm 50~ pages away from finishing the book, I've been tortured by many prompts. NONE OF THEM are as appealing as inadvertent matchmaking!Placidus.
It's pretty much canon, I could QUOTE it at you, and so please, anons, I would like Placidus' snide remarks continually forcing Esca and Marcus together until they really are together, and Placidus' complete and utter horror at realizing what he has done. Double bonus points for Marcus and Esca being pretty oblivious throughout.
2) Esca/Marcus, military AU
Marcus is an American officer on loan to the British military, assigned to temporarily lead a special forces squad and bring them up to date on American techniques and procedures. One of the soldiers, Esca, is not too happy about a Yankee telling him what to do.
Bonus points for Esca's polite "yessirs" while he's glaring, seething with rage or smirking.
More bonus points if Marcus's attempts to put Esca in his place end up with Esca topping the hell out of him (he can top from the bottom, I don't mind).
Even more bonus points for the use of military equipment and weaponry during sex.
) Esca/Marcus- AU, druid!Esca
Can be bookverse or movieverse, but I would like Esca to be both a warrior and a druid, a keeper of the tribe's traditions. Suppose he managed to keep his druidic powers secret, unlike being the chieftain's son, warrior elite etc, etc. But somewhere post-book/movie, while they're all happily farming, something terrible happens, animals dying, no crops, horrible weather, or Marcus gets really sick, whatever you like. And Esca is suddenly very fierce and BAMF and performing obscure bloody rituals, maybe tattooing Marcus to ward of evil spirits... It's all very mysterious and Marcus is promptly smitten. Or even more smitten than before. You know. Maybe Esca needs to fuck Marcus in Stonehenge to prevent the end of the world.
4) Esca/Marcus, anger issues, stand-off
Marcus has a temper and anger issues.
Esca is the only one who doesn't back down or back off.
Bonus points if Esca is still a slave.
I absolutely adore this, cause it has so much potential for wonderful and spot-on characterization while still being quite short and general. There seem to be quite a few fics out there with Marcus as the 'sappiest Master ever' but, I am of the fraction that things might not have been as rosy.
5) Esca/Marcus, Roman AU, powerful Esca
I'd like to read about Esca being in a position of power in the Roman empire, in spite of his ethnic background (is it even historically possible? it should be, it's an AU - maybe he's an emissary or a South-North Relations consultant, or an auxilia officer who got promoted for something extraordinary, IDEK, sorry :)), while Marcus is still an active military commander.
6) Esca/Marcus, modern AU, suicidal!Esca, hitman!Marcus, angst&violence
Esca wants to die (reasons up to the author), but he wants an honorable death (as far as it's possible) so he uses a middleman to contract a hit on himself.Marcus is a recognized professional, he always researches his targets thoroughly, so he knows that his target wants to die but will fight to his last breath.
Cue respect, guys bonding while trying to kill each other, and a happy ending :)Bonus points if Esca has some kind of a military (or similar) background and will pose some challenge for Marcus.
7) Esca/Marcus - massage & frotting
While Esca is still slave he's instructed to massage Marcus's bad leg. Marcus (who is wearing no trousers/leggings) lies on his stomach on the table while Esca massages him. Eventually the tension and UST builds between them until one day Esca's hands move further up, massaging Marcus's ass, etc, and that leads to frotting (either against each other or Marcus rubbing off against the table while Esca massages him).
8) Esca/Marcus/Esca, magical threesome
Happy (Pre-)Gay Farmers era.
Tired with all the hard work, Esca wishes there were two of him. Both he and Marcus are shocked then the wish is fulfilled. The new Esca is exactly the same as the old one and they get along splendidly, work, hunt and sleep together in a perfect unison. After a couple of days they begin to notice Marcus's foul mood. They come to a conclusion that he feels left out and lonely.
Cue both Escas seducing Marcus and making him feel wanted and needed :)
OH ALL YE FAITHFUL, this week it was up to Reverend ladytiferet to pick two canon prompts and for my humble humble self, to choose those of the alternate variety. We cannot help but hope that there is something for everyone in this week's Service and that donation will tumble, aplenty, onto the altar steps.
Prompt 1
Esca/Marcus - movieverse, hate-sex
What it says on the tin - true, rough, merciless hatesex with Marcus and Esca seeing each other as equals and trying to get the upper hand.
They are both frustrated and hate each other and themselves for how much they care about the other, even though the other doesn't deserve it... Standard drill there :)
I don't care who ends up bottoming, Although I would appreciate the result to be kind a draw with both of them losing/winning :)
JUST LIKE BACARDI MOJITO AND COSMOPOLITAN THIS PROMPT IS A TRUE CANON CLASSIC. WE ALL KNOW THAT THOSE SMOULDERING LOOKS ESCA AND MARCUS WOULD EVENTUALLY END UP IN BACKS HITTING WALLS AND THOSE OLDE ROMAN SHELVES GROWING RAGGEDY WITH THOSE FRANTIC THRUSTS AGAINST THEM. THIS HAS SO MUCH POTENTION FOR BRAIN-BURNING HOTNESS AND RAW, UNCOUTH, RAKING TENDERNESS.
I GET DREAMY-EYED JUST THINKING ABOUT IT GOD.
Prompt 2
Esca/Marcus, movieverse, blindfold
Esca is a more dominant person in their relationship on any given day, but once in a while he needs to relinquish control, so he lets Marcus blindfold him.
Bonus points for confident, authoritative, but calm and caring Marcus.
!!!!!!!
Prompt
Esca/Marcus, due south AU
Marcus first came to england on the trail of the killers and besmirchers of his father and for reasons that don't need exploring at this juncture, he has remained attached as liaison to Scotland Yard.
Bonuses for: Cradoc as Vecchio, Esca as Kowalski, Aquila as his uncle's ghost, who visits him on lieu of his dad, who's been missing in ghostland for a while, and Esca having a dance step rug in his apartment and a gossipy landlady who tells Marcus everything about his habits.
AHAHAHAHA I REFUSED TO INFORM THE OTHER REVEREND ABOUT THIS PROMPT LOL. BUT SINCE YOU HAD TO BE UNDER A ROCK IN ORDER NOT TO HEAR ME MOANING ABOUT TIF MOVING TO CANADA, I SIMPLY *HAD* TO REQUEST SOMETHING INCLUDING CANADIAN MOUNTIES. TO EASE THE PAIN, FLOCK, TO EASE THE PAIN.
Look at me, Reverend. My heart is in tatters, you have left me here, in woe, like an ill-begotten maiden, next time you see me I'll be drinking absynth oot the bottle and fucking talentless poets! MARK MY WORDS, REVEREND TIF FOR WOE IS ME.
ANYWAY I HOPE YOU'LL ENJOY THIS PROMPT IF IT IS INDEED FILLED.
Prompt 4
Esca/Marcus, Modern AU, kissing booth
Marcus and Esca meet at a kissing booth. Sparks fly.
Yes, I just watched She's The Man. :D
THIS PROMPT HAS BEEN SUGGESTED BY OUR KEEN, OH EVER SO KEEN, ALTAR GIRL ninja_orange AND WHO ARE WE TO DENY HER? IT'S SIMPLE YET IT'S SIZZLING.
who else but the amazing, the wondrous, the utterly lovely lalazee to fill this prompt? And of course she has in the sizzling Worth More Than a Dollar and filled for the second time, by the lovely lulahbelle in her slightly darker Lift Me UP
I hope that you have genuinely enjoyed our prompts for this
evening and that they will serve to please you in the most carnal of ways.
As always we are very open to everyone; old and new, for next week's Service or just let us know of things more general, do not hesitate to contact us via PM, email, a pigeon or a long distance hamster and we shall respond to you with spectacular promptness.
Always remember to SIN BOLDLY
We remain,
Your Obedient Servants in Porn,
The Reverends
GOD SPEED, FAITHFUL ONES, GOD SPEED.
oh and I would have forgotten, the Libernalia sign-ups are now open. I know a lot of you are busy writing your Big Bangs, but for those who do not this might a more apprealing option, with 1K minimum it's doable in a couple of afternoons ;)
take part in the eagle_exchange and Sign Up
YOUR CHURCH NEEDS YOU.