(no subject)
i'm feeling lots of intense emotions lately.
i'd like to do something creative with them but it's all so heavy.
i'm so tired of being bottled up. i'm so tired of blaming myself because it's my fault.
sometimes it just gets suffocating. i have so many stories to tell and i never know where to begin.
i've become too comfortable with nostalgia. memories of the glory days are no longer inspiring. they've become nightmares. no more do they fill me with warmth. they tell me of what was and now is gone.
everything is just so, comfortable... excessively so. in many ways i miss being a teenager. yes, i've grown wiser, but what happened to the spark? to the idealism? to the rebellion against all things mediocre and numb and passionless? have i become what i once loathed? but i don't think it's too late. it never is.
i just have to...
wake up.
not just wake up, but get up.
i've been asleep for too long and there's work to be done.
i'd like to do something creative with them but it's all so heavy.
i'm so tired of being bottled up. i'm so tired of blaming myself because it's my fault.
sometimes it just gets suffocating. i have so many stories to tell and i never know where to begin.
i've become too comfortable with nostalgia. memories of the glory days are no longer inspiring. they've become nightmares. no more do they fill me with warmth. they tell me of what was and now is gone.
everything is just so, comfortable... excessively so. in many ways i miss being a teenager. yes, i've grown wiser, but what happened to the spark? to the idealism? to the rebellion against all things mediocre and numb and passionless? have i become what i once loathed? but i don't think it's too late. it never is.
i just have to...
wake up.
not just wake up, but get up.
i've been asleep for too long and there's work to be done.