3266: Aussi Froid Que Noir S'est Leve - Hermione Granger
Here is the fifth fic for Prophesy Week. It's another older fic, this one being 2003
- Twilth Annual Pottersues Contest is going to start soon, so start thinking about the entries you want to enter.
- I decided to go through the older pepper jack cheese entries and found this for our Flash Back Sue.
- This is the problem with famous celebrities doing theater. I'm not saying that Denzel Washington doesn't deserve to go back to theater, but he certainly doesn't deserve his fans to treat him the way they did while he was preforming. Should I also mention this isn't proper etiquette for people viewing a play period? I'd say kids these days, but I honestly don't think these are kids.
TITLE: Aussi Froid Que Noir S'est Leve
PERPETRATOR: bottleofsunshine
SUE-O-METER:
(awful)
COVER/BANNER ART: None... older fic...
SUMMARY:”In their sixth year, the two top students find that they have been chosen in a prophesy. What happens when that prophesy can be a curse...or a spell? R/R!! Luv Y'all!!” The real summary though is this. ”n an old castle, a parchment is unrolled. In gold and silver letters, the fancy script sparkled in the flickering fire. The old man went to sit down. The letters whispered outloud in a many voices, "We believe in the angel, Natasha, and her husband, Evan. The prophecy states..." Oh, what a weird year this will become for a couple Hogwarts students.”
FULL NAME: Hermione Granger... Draco
SPECIES: Granger is high on pepper-jack cheese and unable to act like her normal self. Even her mother starts to notice a difference, but that is only because her mum wants a student with the best grades.
HAIR: Like canon... painfully so. The writer says having it frizzy is the only way it looks good.
EYES: Like canon...
MARKINGS: Nothing specific.
POSSESSIONS: “She threw on a pair of khakis and a white knitted sweater. She quickly loaded up her carry-on items, (including seven 1,000+ page leisure books and some money), and headed out to the car.”
CONNECTION TO CANON: Hermione acts like you expect a lot of female fanfic writers if they were allowed to get away with it. The next day she showers to catch the train and Fred and George have created something called “Slytherin's Drinks” that Harry and Ron seem to have smuggled it in. It seems to involve “pink glittery feathers and all”. Draco walks in, Hermione blushes behind her book. Hinckledoober is the new professor and they got nine new Gryffindors. Both she and Draco get packages which neather can open until Halloween at midnight. Albus is then reminded about the prophesy by “Olivia, Madaline, Bella, Natalie, Heidi, 'Trina, and Analise”. Says Dumbledore to McGonagall's. "Well, Minerva, it seems Natasha and Evan have unleashed the curse...and it has been traced to find the fates resting here in Hogwarts." Dumbledore is worried because no packages have come and then decides to announce that two of the students are in danger instead of just issuing a curfew. Then it is Hermione's sweet sixteen. She gets a letter from Analise saying to take lots of pictures and that they'll get to know each other later. (Creepy...)
ORIGIN: The writer replaces Hermione with some girl who procrastinates with her homework and likes American Idol. The writer changed the characters birthdays. (Weren't they revealed by 2003? Draco's and Hermione's that is?)
SPECIAL ABILITIES:”Under the kitchen table lay a text, forgotten, with a shiny A glowing in the florescent lights. Last-minute was very un-Hermione. You can probably tell she sorta' changed.” Yeah... no kidding. The writer's explanation for this? “Oh, and, I wanted to create a summer Hermione. You know, not everyone can be that serious all the time, ::ahem:: me ::ahem::. So, I'm sorry if you didn't like that OOC, but I promise it's going away with the holidays.” No... I think you just had Hermione act the way you want to act during the summer. There is a big difference.
NOTES: According to Google translate because I didn't want to bother pulling out a language dictionary the title translates to “So Cold That Black Rose”, but a better translation with a bit of translation is “Therefore Cool That Black Rose”. One of the reviewers taking French 2 translated it as “Cold as Black it Raises Itself.” Another is “As Cold as Black itself!” Hermione also hyperventilates despite the fact this is never evidenced in the books.
Anyways... I couldn't read past chapter five.
SAMPLE:
Hermione Granger snorted as she laughed. This 'American Idol' judge was hilarius, but truthful.
"Last time I said someone was the worst singer in America, but you, you are the worst singer in the world." The man, Simon, spat. Hermione couldn't help it, she doubled over at the pained look on the contestant.
It was summer holidays and she was a different person entirely. Snorting like a pig and saying to her mum, "What homework?"
Her hair was still frizzy, and it had no shape. The only thing that looked good with her hair was a ponytail or just letting it wild. Hermione's figure was very hidden, almost as if she were hiding a third breast or an arm from her belly button.
Hermione yawned and stuffed another cheeto in her mouth. "Dear God! Who do these people think they are?"
The ridiculous singers, (some of whom you would scream "That doesn't deserve to be called a singer!"), continued to belt out crazy songs.
"Hermione! Did you do the holiday's homework!" Mrs. Granger screamed up to the den in which Hermione resided.
"Huh?" She zoned into the silly people on TV.
"School's tomarrow, missy! Get your arse down here and do that homework, or I'll personally throw your clothes out the window and kick you out!" Hermione snapped back to reality.
"Merde! How could I forget school starts! Merlin, when do I get a break?" Hermione ran down the stairs, quickly avoiding the death glare sent by her 'knowing' parents.
"Erm...I only have a couple subjects." She skidded to a halt and took out five books.
"Only a couple?" Mr. Granger teased, seeing the piles of books.
"Yes." Hermione quickly wrote in big, wavy letters. "Transfiguration... humans... dangerous...people...screw- ups, no, simple errors... troubling results... arms missing... memory loss... no knowledge of prior training... conclusion is that it is dangerous and shouldn't be done without, erm, proper instructions and permission from the, erm, candidate or subject." She muttered as she completed the 4' parchment. (AN: That is like almost four pages. 11 inches on a paper...)
"Done."
- Twilth Annual Pottersues Contest is going to start soon, so start thinking about the entries you want to enter.
- I decided to go through the older pepper jack cheese entries and found this for our Flash Back Sue.
- This is the problem with famous celebrities doing theater. I'm not saying that Denzel Washington doesn't deserve to go back to theater, but he certainly doesn't deserve his fans to treat him the way they did while he was preforming. Should I also mention this isn't proper etiquette for people viewing a play period? I'd say kids these days, but I honestly don't think these are kids.
TITLE: Aussi Froid Que Noir S'est Leve
PERPETRATOR: bottleofsunshine
SUE-O-METER:
(awful)
COVER/BANNER ART: None... older fic...
SUMMARY:”In their sixth year, the two top students find that they have been chosen in a prophesy. What happens when that prophesy can be a curse...or a spell? R/R!! Luv Y'all!!” The real summary though is this. ”n an old castle, a parchment is unrolled. In gold and silver letters, the fancy script sparkled in the flickering fire. The old man went to sit down. The letters whispered outloud in a many voices, "We believe in the angel, Natasha, and her husband, Evan. The prophecy states..." Oh, what a weird year this will become for a couple Hogwarts students.”
FULL NAME: Hermione Granger... Draco
SPECIES: Granger is high on pepper-jack cheese and unable to act like her normal self. Even her mother starts to notice a difference, but that is only because her mum wants a student with the best grades.
HAIR: Like canon... painfully so. The writer says having it frizzy is the only way it looks good.
EYES: Like canon...
MARKINGS: Nothing specific.
POSSESSIONS: “She threw on a pair of khakis and a white knitted sweater. She quickly loaded up her carry-on items, (including seven 1,000+ page leisure books and some money), and headed out to the car.”
CONNECTION TO CANON: Hermione acts like you expect a lot of female fanfic writers if they were allowed to get away with it. The next day she showers to catch the train and Fred and George have created something called “Slytherin's Drinks” that Harry and Ron seem to have smuggled it in. It seems to involve “pink glittery feathers and all”. Draco walks in, Hermione blushes behind her book. Hinckledoober is the new professor and they got nine new Gryffindors. Both she and Draco get packages which neather can open until Halloween at midnight. Albus is then reminded about the prophesy by “Olivia, Madaline, Bella, Natalie, Heidi, 'Trina, and Analise”. Says Dumbledore to McGonagall's. "Well, Minerva, it seems Natasha and Evan have unleashed the curse...and it has been traced to find the fates resting here in Hogwarts." Dumbledore is worried because no packages have come and then decides to announce that two of the students are in danger instead of just issuing a curfew. Then it is Hermione's sweet sixteen. She gets a letter from Analise saying to take lots of pictures and that they'll get to know each other later. (Creepy...)
ORIGIN: The writer replaces Hermione with some girl who procrastinates with her homework and likes American Idol. The writer changed the characters birthdays. (Weren't they revealed by 2003? Draco's and Hermione's that is?)
SPECIAL ABILITIES:”Under the kitchen table lay a text, forgotten, with a shiny A glowing in the florescent lights. Last-minute was very un-Hermione. You can probably tell she sorta' changed.” Yeah... no kidding. The writer's explanation for this? “Oh, and, I wanted to create a summer Hermione. You know, not everyone can be that serious all the time, ::ahem:: me ::ahem::. So, I'm sorry if you didn't like that OOC, but I promise it's going away with the holidays.” No... I think you just had Hermione act the way you want to act during the summer. There is a big difference.
NOTES: According to Google translate because I didn't want to bother pulling out a language dictionary the title translates to “So Cold That Black Rose”, but a better translation with a bit of translation is “Therefore Cool That Black Rose”. One of the reviewers taking French 2 translated it as “Cold as Black it Raises Itself.” Another is “As Cold as Black itself!” Hermione also hyperventilates despite the fact this is never evidenced in the books.
Anyways... I couldn't read past chapter five.
SAMPLE:
Hermione Granger snorted as she laughed. This 'American Idol' judge was hilarius, but truthful.
"Last time I said someone was the worst singer in America, but you, you are the worst singer in the world." The man, Simon, spat. Hermione couldn't help it, she doubled over at the pained look on the contestant.
It was summer holidays and she was a different person entirely. Snorting like a pig and saying to her mum, "What homework?"
Her hair was still frizzy, and it had no shape. The only thing that looked good with her hair was a ponytail or just letting it wild. Hermione's figure was very hidden, almost as if she were hiding a third breast or an arm from her belly button.
Hermione yawned and stuffed another cheeto in her mouth. "Dear God! Who do these people think they are?"
The ridiculous singers, (some of whom you would scream "That doesn't deserve to be called a singer!"), continued to belt out crazy songs.
"Hermione! Did you do the holiday's homework!" Mrs. Granger screamed up to the den in which Hermione resided.
"Huh?" She zoned into the silly people on TV.
"School's tomarrow, missy! Get your arse down here and do that homework, or I'll personally throw your clothes out the window and kick you out!" Hermione snapped back to reality.
"Merde! How could I forget school starts! Merlin, when do I get a break?" Hermione ran down the stairs, quickly avoiding the death glare sent by her 'knowing' parents.
"Erm...I only have a couple subjects." She skidded to a halt and took out five books.
"Only a couple?" Mr. Granger teased, seeing the piles of books.
"Yes." Hermione quickly wrote in big, wavy letters. "Transfiguration... humans... dangerous...people...screw- ups, no, simple errors... troubling results... arms missing... memory loss... no knowledge of prior training... conclusion is that it is dangerous and shouldn't be done without, erm, proper instructions and permission from the, erm, candidate or subject." She muttered as she completed the 4' parchment. (AN: That is like almost four pages. 11 inches on a paper...)
"Done."