0006: The Girl All the Bad Guys Want - Ginny Weasley
Gads, I've been doing this less than a week, and I'm already building up a backlogue of these darn Sues. >.< And to think I thought this was going to be difficult.
Well, we've had a Hermione Sue. Let's try a Ginevra Sue. Why do the ones who like to pose as canon characters always go after Draco?
TITLE: The Girl All the Bad Guys Want
PERPETRATOR: dracoscutie
SUE-O-METER: (how bad is it?)
WRITING: ***
SUEAGE: ***
WRONGNESS:
***
FULL NAME: Unknown
SPECIES: Human/Witch
HAIR: "She had brilliant curly auburn hair"
EYES: "Her eyes had become brighter and more mysterious, looking more like chocolate with a little bit of yellow in them"
MARKINGS: None, but it does go into some detail about her "amazing complexion" and "great tall, slim body that most girls would kill for."
POSESSIONS: The keys to whatever trunk or closet she's locked up Ginny Weasley in.
ORIGIN: Unknown
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Pretending to be Ginny Weasley
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Convincing everybody this flaming goddess is Ron's little sister. Making Draco turn suddenly into a Sweet, Helpful Guy. Turning Colin Creevy into a lust-crazed rapist.
NOTES: The author calls herself 'dracoscutie.' Danger! Danger, Will Robinson!
This fic actually starts off fairly well, with Ginny thinking about how she's always imagined having a beautiful, romantic wedding. This I can buy - Ginny seems like the quiet, romantic type who'd daydream about something like that. Unfortunately, this is the fic's high point.
I can't comment too much on Ginny's characterization after that point, since we don't know her very well in the books... I suppose that's why it's tempting for authors to Sue her. If we don't know what she's really like, you can make up any old crap you want and nobody can complain too much. And to be totally honest, Ginny gets on my nerves a bit, anyway.
And then there's Draco. I'm tempted to classify this story as a Draco Sue instead of a Ginny Sue... heck, maybe it's a double Sue! Maybe both Draco and Ginny have been replaced by their evil doubles from another dimension! I'll have to take a look and see if this fic's Draco has a goatee and bad eyebrows.
*checks*
Okay, apparently not, but this can't be the Draco Malfoy we know and hate. This Draco obviously doesn't care about his position as a Seeker, since he went to a 'Wizarding Gym' (*snerk*) and bulked up over the summer. Not only that, but he wonders how a nice woman like his mother could ever have married somebody as awful as his father (!) and steps in to save a Weasley from a (completely out-of-the-blue) attack.
The whole story is so absurd (and rather romance-novel-esque) that I had a hard time choosing a sample to post. I finally settled on the ridiculous rescue scene, but before we do that, I just have to show you this paragraph describing Ginny Sue:
Draco had a chance to study Ginny as she slept soundly across from him. Her eyes, though they were closed, he had seen to be a dark chocolate brown with a tinge of yellow. She had lost a few pounds, not that she needed it, making her look extremely fragile and angel-like with her milky white skin. Her hair was what stunned Draco the most. Soft, curly, auburn curls were cascading down towards the floor. Who knew that the trademark Weasley hair could be so beautiful?
SAMPLE:
Ginny put all of her stuff on the train and began looking for an empty compartment.
Finally, she found one.
"Of course! The last one!" Ginny said exasperated, sitting down just as the train lurched forward. Ginny looked out of the window at the beautiful countryside when she heard someone enter her compartment. Ginny looked up and saw the eyes of Colin Creevy.
"Hey Gin, what's up?" he asked, seeming very bubbly.
"Not much and with you?" Ginny questioned politely. She didn't really like Colin all that much, she always found him a bit annoying.
"Same old thing." Colin beamed. "But listen Gin, I thought that maybe sometime this year you and I could grab a bite to eat when we're in Hogsmeade." He suggested, trying to act nonchalant.
"Colin, that's really sweet of you but, I'd rather just be friends if that's okay." Ginny said sincerely.
Colin's eyes flashed red in anger.
"Gin, I really thought you liked me this year." Colin said, standing up. Ginny didn't know how to react so she remained quietly seated. "Why don't you like me Gin?" Colin yelled coming closer to her.
"Colin, Ginny began, trying to be a voice of reason, "I barely know you. And you just came in here and announced that you liked me - I just don't know you." Ginny said, shaking her head.
"Don't make excuses, Gin," Colin whispered, his eyes flashing once more. He stepped forward and grabbed Ginny by the arms, He held her so tight that Ginny knew that there would be large purple bruises there in the morning. Colin forced her against the wall, still holding her only be her arms. "I love you Gin. You will love me too. Even if I have to make you." He whispered as though he had lost it.
He brought his face to hers, and he came crashing down hard on her lips. He was hurting her so badly and she was trying to fight back but she couldn't. He was trying to force her to kiss him too but he noticed that it wasn't working and began biting at her lips. She could taste the blood leaking through her closed lips. Just when her strength was nearly gone and she was about to give in, she heard someone else enter the compartment. This didn't stop Colin, if anything he bit down harder on her lip making her cry out in pain, before Ginny heard a deep voice yell,
"Expelliarmus!"
* * *
Ginny looked up, still tasting the blood that now coated her lips. She saw a pair of concerned gray eyes.
Draco Malfoy.
Ginny stumbled backwards, thinking that perhaps he was here to hurt her too.
"Are you okay?" Draco asked.
Ginny nodded, not looking at him but sinking to the floor.
"Are you sure?" Draco said. He couldn't see her face, it was hidden by her beautiful, glossy, auburn hair. Her crouched down next to her.
"N-n-no." Ginny whimpered. She began crying from all the pain she was experiencing.
Draco was shocked that she had changed her mind. He pushed her hair out of her face to reveal her bloody lips.
"Oh my gosh!" Draco gasped, looking at the damage that had been done. "You're bleeding!"
Ginny nodded.
Draco pulled of his t-shirt he had been wearing and pressed it gently to her mutilated lips. This was only to buy time to remember the healing charm that he had just learned. He then muttered it under his breath.
"Better?" He asked.
Ginny nodded, still whimpering.
"Don't worry, it'll be alright." Draco attempted to sound soothing. He didn't know why he helped her and not enjoyed the suffering of a Weasley, but he didn't care. He pulled Ginny into his arms and let her sob openly on him.
Well, we've had a Hermione Sue. Let's try a Ginevra Sue. Why do the ones who like to pose as canon characters always go after Draco?
TITLE: The Girl All the Bad Guys Want
PERPETRATOR: dracoscutie
SUE-O-METER: (how bad is it?)
WRITING: ***
SUEAGE: ***
WRONGNESS:
***
FULL NAME: Unknown
SPECIES: Human/Witch
HAIR: "She had brilliant curly auburn hair"
EYES: "Her eyes had become brighter and more mysterious, looking more like chocolate with a little bit of yellow in them"
MARKINGS: None, but it does go into some detail about her "amazing complexion" and "great tall, slim body that most girls would kill for."
POSESSIONS: The keys to whatever trunk or closet she's locked up Ginny Weasley in.
ORIGIN: Unknown
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Pretending to be Ginny Weasley
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Convincing everybody this flaming goddess is Ron's little sister. Making Draco turn suddenly into a Sweet, Helpful Guy. Turning Colin Creevy into a lust-crazed rapist.
NOTES: The author calls herself 'dracoscutie.' Danger! Danger, Will Robinson!
This fic actually starts off fairly well, with Ginny thinking about how she's always imagined having a beautiful, romantic wedding. This I can buy - Ginny seems like the quiet, romantic type who'd daydream about something like that. Unfortunately, this is the fic's high point.
I can't comment too much on Ginny's characterization after that point, since we don't know her very well in the books... I suppose that's why it's tempting for authors to Sue her. If we don't know what she's really like, you can make up any old crap you want and nobody can complain too much. And to be totally honest, Ginny gets on my nerves a bit, anyway.
And then there's Draco. I'm tempted to classify this story as a Draco Sue instead of a Ginny Sue... heck, maybe it's a double Sue! Maybe both Draco and Ginny have been replaced by their evil doubles from another dimension! I'll have to take a look and see if this fic's Draco has a goatee and bad eyebrows.
*checks*
Okay, apparently not, but this can't be the Draco Malfoy we know and hate. This Draco obviously doesn't care about his position as a Seeker, since he went to a 'Wizarding Gym' (*snerk*) and bulked up over the summer. Not only that, but he wonders how a nice woman like his mother could ever have married somebody as awful as his father (!) and steps in to save a Weasley from a (completely out-of-the-blue) attack.
The whole story is so absurd (and rather romance-novel-esque) that I had a hard time choosing a sample to post. I finally settled on the ridiculous rescue scene, but before we do that, I just have to show you this paragraph describing Ginny Sue:
Draco had a chance to study Ginny as she slept soundly across from him. Her eyes, though they were closed, he had seen to be a dark chocolate brown with a tinge of yellow. She had lost a few pounds, not that she needed it, making her look extremely fragile and angel-like with her milky white skin. Her hair was what stunned Draco the most. Soft, curly, auburn curls were cascading down towards the floor. Who knew that the trademark Weasley hair could be so beautiful?
SAMPLE:
Ginny put all of her stuff on the train and began looking for an empty compartment.
Finally, she found one.
"Of course! The last one!" Ginny said exasperated, sitting down just as the train lurched forward. Ginny looked out of the window at the beautiful countryside when she heard someone enter her compartment. Ginny looked up and saw the eyes of Colin Creevy.
"Hey Gin, what's up?" he asked, seeming very bubbly.
"Not much and with you?" Ginny questioned politely. She didn't really like Colin all that much, she always found him a bit annoying.
"Same old thing." Colin beamed. "But listen Gin, I thought that maybe sometime this year you and I could grab a bite to eat when we're in Hogsmeade." He suggested, trying to act nonchalant.
"Colin, that's really sweet of you but, I'd rather just be friends if that's okay." Ginny said sincerely.
Colin's eyes flashed red in anger.
"Gin, I really thought you liked me this year." Colin said, standing up. Ginny didn't know how to react so she remained quietly seated. "Why don't you like me Gin?" Colin yelled coming closer to her.
"Colin, Ginny began, trying to be a voice of reason, "I barely know you. And you just came in here and announced that you liked me - I just don't know you." Ginny said, shaking her head.
"Don't make excuses, Gin," Colin whispered, his eyes flashing once more. He stepped forward and grabbed Ginny by the arms, He held her so tight that Ginny knew that there would be large purple bruises there in the morning. Colin forced her against the wall, still holding her only be her arms. "I love you Gin. You will love me too. Even if I have to make you." He whispered as though he had lost it.
He brought his face to hers, and he came crashing down hard on her lips. He was hurting her so badly and she was trying to fight back but she couldn't. He was trying to force her to kiss him too but he noticed that it wasn't working and began biting at her lips. She could taste the blood leaking through her closed lips. Just when her strength was nearly gone and she was about to give in, she heard someone else enter the compartment. This didn't stop Colin, if anything he bit down harder on her lip making her cry out in pain, before Ginny heard a deep voice yell,
"Expelliarmus!"
* * *
Ginny looked up, still tasting the blood that now coated her lips. She saw a pair of concerned gray eyes.
Draco Malfoy.
Ginny stumbled backwards, thinking that perhaps he was here to hurt her too.
"Are you okay?" Draco asked.
Ginny nodded, not looking at him but sinking to the floor.
"Are you sure?" Draco said. He couldn't see her face, it was hidden by her beautiful, glossy, auburn hair. Her crouched down next to her.
"N-n-no." Ginny whimpered. She began crying from all the pain she was experiencing.
Draco was shocked that she had changed her mind. He pushed her hair out of her face to reveal her bloody lips.
"Oh my gosh!" Draco gasped, looking at the damage that had been done. "You're bleeding!"
Ginny nodded.
Draco pulled of his t-shirt he had been wearing and pressed it gently to her mutilated lips. This was only to buy time to remember the healing charm that he had just learned. He then muttered it under his breath.
"Better?" He asked.
Ginny nodded, still whimpering.
"Don't worry, it'll be alright." Draco attempted to sound soothing. He didn't know why he helped her and not enjoyed the suffering of a Weasley, but he didn't care. He pulled Ginny into his arms and let her sob openly on him.