Fen
Sometimes, when I play with the search feature at the Pit, I scare myself. Today is a good example. I give you All For a Bloody Thesis, which features one Ginny "Car" Weasley going back in time, presumably to frolic with Jack Sparrow. Car is short for "Carrot" and is a nickname given to her by "Draco Malfoy, her best friend, [who is] entirely and unequivocally homosexual." In her bio the author mentions Faith/Jack Sparrow and Dawn/Legolas as two of her favorite ships.
I ask you, what kind of crack are these people smoking?
TITLE: Pirate to the death
CULPRIT: jeyke
SUMMARY: "A young girl, having been stranded on an island for practically all of her life meets the Captain himself (by there I mean Jack of course) and goes off to find her past, with, as her only clue a map (classic story line, I know...)"
BEST LINE: "'Cry not liuhl one, sshh,' came the whisper, 'Ther' may be 'naught but tears teh cry upon m'whithr'd arm, bu' I'd see m'self dead, buried an' all, before y'cem teh h'rm.'" My brain hurts.
THE VERDICT
Walk the plank, bitch.
NAME: Fen
EYES: not described
HAIR: "hair burnt red by the sun"
DISTINGUISHING FEATURES: I guess looking like a boy. Also, Jack thinks there's something about her that says "I'm hiding something" and he thinks that Sue looks like she could "beat the living daylights out of any one of his crew." What. Ev. Er.
OH SO SPESHUL POSSESSIONS: A sword that she got from... somewhere.
OBNOXIOUS AND/OR IMPLAUSIBLE ORIGIN: Pintel found her on an island as a baby and raised her.
OBNOXIOUS AND/OR IMPLAUSIBLE CANON CONNECTIONS/AFFILIATIONS: Is a complete and total bitch to Jack. Will end up his one true love, most likely.
SOOPER SPESHUL ABILITIES: Being a loon.
THE "PLOT": Honestly, I don't have much of an idea exactly what's going on in this one. The prologue is just a few paragraphs of dialogue with an "accent" so horrific that I don't have the patience to try and figure out what it says. The gist, however, is that dude's found a baby on an island somewhere. We get a little timestamp of fifteen years later and Jack has been marooned on said island. I have no idea what time in relation to the movie this takes place or how Jack has managed to get himself marooned again. Anyway, Sue is hanging around on the island still. She threatens and ties up Jack for... well, no reason, really. She strikes me as being a bit nuts. Of course, living one's entire life on an island with Pintel might make someone nuts. He's the mystery man who found her you see (as revealed in chapter three). But then she seems the kind of nuts where she's not really supposed to be nuts, but a kick-ass grrl. In my wholly objective, personal opinion, she's batshit crazy. She's also, apparently, rather androgynous since all she has to do is tie her hair back to make Jack think she's a boy. Or maybe she's a hermaphrodite. Either way, Jack says that he'll get her off the island if she doesn't kill him. He gets her to gather a bunch of wood to build a raft. Apparently, this island is half a day away from Tortuga on a proper boat, so they're going to row there in on their raft. Jack goes off to do his business in some trees or something and Sue rages at the universe because apparently Pintel is dead.
NOTES: Uhm... yeah. Crappy!
I would complain that Sue has impressive social skills for someone who's spent their entire life with one other person... but while she doesn't act how I think that would cause someone to act, she, certainly, doesn't act normal either. Of course, that psychotic air that she gives off probably wasn't intentional. You never know with these Suethors.
Also, I nominate the horrible dialogue in the prologue for "Worst Accent Ever."
Hey, now that I think about it... when we hit a milestone number of Sues that would actually be a good category for a little awards thingy.
EXCERPT:
--the Hell?
Chapter 1: A desolate spit of land
The sun dropped, leaving 'naught but the faintest trickle of rosèd peach in the distant horizon. The wind whipped past the sodden ropes whisking foam- spray from the crashing waves. A child's cry screamed out, the only sound to be heard in the deep storm. Rotten, the planks of a sunken ship drifted deeper into the blooded water, that, as it neared the shore, broke into a thousand crashes. The last colours drained away into the depth of the night, hiding the crimes of the former day and opening doors to those that the wayward darkness had not ushered back to their safe haven.
A crackling came from the bushes bordering the shore. Someone crept softly down to the water side, "Cry not liuhl one, sshh," came the whisper, "Ther' may be 'naught but tears teh cry upon m'whithr'd arm, bu' I'd see m'self dead, buried an' all, before y'cem teh h'rm." the song flowed softly out to the clouded sky, it's soft melody calming to tired minds. A content gurgle came from a bundle of blankets. "Yer bin real brave yer have, in yer place, I'd not 'ave bin able teh keep my eyes from closing But there ain't neh need teh worry yerself now; I be wiv yer, me liuhl darlin'" He bent down and layed his lips softly to the baby's forehead, "I'll never let a tear cross yer cheek, engel. I's jus' yer an' me now. All the others, wel, the'r kind o' not 'ere no more, see wha' I mean. "Enyway, don't you be a' worrying yerself. Ye'll be fine, tiptop as the french cap'n used teh say" He looked down at the tiny bundle in his arms and, although it was too dark to be sure, gave such a look of love, one would have thought it his own child.
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Fifteen years later
Jack pushed through the undergrowth, "God damn it," he cried out. He was getting to have enough of "all this maroonin'" as he called it. Second time an' all that that year.
"I mean," he said to no-one in particular-indeed there appeared to be no- one in these god forsaken parts, "it's not like I was the only one havin' a bit to drink. Shouldn't 'ave expected anythin' else from Barbossa's kin, though, really," he muttered the last bit angrily under his breath, his eyes whirling around. His arms flailed out either side as if to keep him balanced and let's just say that he wasn't really "a' walkin'" in a straight line... He squinted at the near empty bottle clutched in his hand, "God, anyone would think he tapered with the rum", he took a few more crooked steps, "Bloody 'ell, stop hittin' me, would yer!" Clutching his head he looked around. Funny, there didn't seem to be anyone there, maybe he had bumped into a tree. He grinned idioticly, "Yeah, that must've been..." He whacked into a low hanging branch and of a sudden his complaints were cut short as he fell back, forced into a starry oblivion.
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He came to, watching as the world tipped gradually back into focus. He shook his head and went to push himself into an upright position, when he felt hard metal cool against the nape of his neck.
"Don't...make...one...move" forceful words filtered to his ears from behind. Jack's mind whizzed - this might be a problem.
"Yeah...well... I'll just be goin'..." he made a move to push the blade away.
"I said and will now repeat... Do not make a move, " he was whirled around and someone grabbed his collar, the point of the sword now pushed down hard against his chest - the stranger was obviously not just making fancy threats. "or I shall transperce your heart."
"Aha, really, yer don't say. Well, I'd be in a bit of a tricky position if yer did, don't yer think..." Jack retorted, attempting unsuccessfully a diplomatic aproach.
"That has absolutely nothing to do with me."
"Well, no, not exactly. But I was thinkin'" he gestured with his arms, still dazy from the rum, which, he thought, had to have been drugged, "if you're stranded here for the same reason as I am, you might need a bit of help gettin'...unstranded." Jack flashed her a grin. The stranger grimaced, Ugh, of all the bad things that could happen... It just had to be a drunken pirate that came along, didn't it. Oh well, she thought, it's not as if there is any other way to get away from here, except swimming, but I'll drown before I even see land. She knew from what little distances she had swum with her pa' that there was no other island within miles, and she had swore on everything she held true that she'd follow the map. The map. Her hand flew to her side... No it was still there.
Jack watched her, Now that is interesting, he thought
"And you have a boat, I suppose?"
"A ship, luv', a ship... the Black Pearl, in fact. Jack started to ease up as the stranger lessened their grip.
"Luv'?" She thought quickly, remembering in one blow all her pa' had told her about pirates... 'taking advantage' of young girls. She'd go under disguise - this...pirate...would never need know. Her looks, she knew, were enough to class her as a boy, well, when her hair was tied back.
"Slip o' the tongue" Jack eyed warily as the sharp blade pushed harder.
"And this ship of yours, it would be passing by, would it?" A gust of laughter burst out from the stranger's throat. "I have lived on this spit of land my entire life and not once has a living person set foot on it's earth, nor one ship anchored on it's shore."
"Who said she wasn't waiting just off shore?"
"I am not a fool, nor am I blind." something in her voice made Jack know she was not joking, and he didn't keep up the pretence.
"Allright, here's the deal" He made himself a bit comfier, causing the stranger to raise an eyebrow. "You let me go free," he gestured wildly with each word, "an' I'll get us teh Tortuga. The only real port in the carribean" He added, seeing his captor's lost look. "What say you?"
"What say you?" This is going to take some getting used to, she realised as she repeated his words, unsure of their meaning.
"What the exactly do you think about my proposition?" He couldn't take it anymore... his head felt like it was splitting in half and this... hellcat... was getting on his nerves.
"Sounds allright," she sat back, keeping her father's sword against Jack's chest. Then frowned, "And precisely what would I do when I got there? I have no money..."
"Ha, well..." Jack looked her - or what was visible of her - up and down, "there's a lot o' space at Tortuga... a lot o' men looking fer 'pleasurable company', as you'd call it." He grinned, showing gold teeth that shone in the sparse rays, "I'm sure you could find some...occupation."
Another burst of laughter, Well, here it goes, she thought grimly "And they'd be gay, would they?" She leant into the light, revealing the face of a sixteen year old "boy" - or so Jack thought - crowned by what must have been shoulder length hair tied scruffily up behind a bandanna. He looked like he was about to burst out laughing and make some catty remark, but, remembering the point against his chest, he just widened his kohl-lined eyes and said "You never know. Sorry, I think I got the wrong end of the stick..."
"You disgusting scallywag. You would have made a woman sell herself?"
Jack eyed the blade again, rather cautiously and thought a while. "I'll give you a place on me ship."
She stared at him, then looked around, sadness creeping to her eyes as she remembered her pa'. She sighed and turned back to Jack - who gave her a curious look - and said matter of factly,
"I accept, on two conditions. One, I want the best cabin on your mangly ship, two, you'll never call me luv' again if you want to keep your tongue. It'll be...Fen." That statement provoked a straightened back and murderous look from Jack. That's me ship you're insulting, you cross-eyed idiot.
"There's only one cabin in me ship, Fen, and that be me own!"
Fen stood up, smiled patiently, whilst bringing her sword to draw blood from his neck. He winced. "I'd think pretty quick if I were you, mister, because the other option is a slit throat..." "That'll be captain to you," he muttered
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What did you think of it? It's my first time so don't come down to hard on me, but please tell me everything... Is Jack true to his nature? I'm not all that sure he is. Too much description? Not enough? PLEASE REVIEW. Everything you say will be taken into account (so don't go mad!) And do you feel it gets a bit long at the end? Oh yeah, are the dialects allright or do they not work?
Thank you for reading it, hope you weren't too bored. See you at Chapter 2!!!
Angst, angst, angst. It's always angst. Why can't any Sues ever be happy? Wait, I take that back. I don't want the universe to provide me with any Sparklypoos, or whatever they'd be called in this fandom.
Chapter 3: Past sickness
"So this father of yours... Yer said he was a member of the Royal Navy. Did he tell yer of the pirate tha' wreaked 'avoc on the fleet? Rather handsome man... Had no match in a sword fight... Some even called 'im..." He swallowed and tried to focus, "Some even called 'im..."
"Yes? Don't stop..." Fen 'encouraged', even though she could easily see he was completely stoned and knew she should take away the bottle of rum she'd given him. Well, I will... she thought, I might just have a bit of a laugh first... She smiled mischeviously. She wouldn't go too far. Just a little joke.
"I jus' need to go alleviate meself," Jack tottered to his feet, his darkened dreadlocks rocking to and fro.
Fen watched him disappear into the trees, now to start on that little trick...
She crept away, down quite far from where Jack had entered.
Some wood would be a good start, then a bit of fire and water... That'll be just right, she thought spotting some relatively dry sticks littering the ground and a couple more, still green pushing out from some young trees.
Fen hacked the branches off, edging nearer to the the borders of the rich undergrowth that blanketed the whole of the centre of the island. This was going to be a good one, teach him right for trying to boast so much. She looked up, it was covered in shadows; the night was beginning to take its toll. She shivered, a slight salty breeze brushing her bare arms.
All of a sudden a sweep of homesickness took hkold of her. Homesick when you've never left home... impossible. But she had left it or rather - it had left her - it had flown back to the past. A single tear made it's way down her cheek. She shook it angrily off. Two weeks, only two weeks. That wasn't much when you thought about it. It wasn't much at all. And the bitter anger that wracked her heart had not yet disappeared. She laughed grimly, As if it would.... She looked down to the pile of sticks laying on the sand. She wasn't in the mood anymore. Couldn't care less if the 'Captain' fell off the cliff or boasted until the ocean's had dried to salt crusts. She just wanted it to go back to normal, back to the way it had been before, when Pintel had taught her to play, taught her to jump and scream from joy. Taught her to use a sword - and she hadn't half fought well when she'd known how to - it had been in her blood and with every parry her mind had soared, soared to meet the seagulls flying in the distant skies. She shivered again, but this time the breeze came from somewhere else, some distant past, wrought with memories, all beautiful and pure, they half jumped out to the twilight, rejoicing to be let out, to be remembered - she had tried to lock them away too hard. True it had only been two weeks, but two weeks was still eternity. Eternity and the slightest moment, what was she thinking, it couldn't be both, could it? Cripes, she was getting herself confused there.
She leant against a nearby tree, feeling it's rough bark, just smelling it, feeling it. Gosh it was real, real like nothing else, real in some still distant way. That's what her life amounted too, when you thought about it, wood, sea and wind. Yeah... wood, sea and wind. The memories flooded back.
"AAAAAHHHHH," she yelled, punching the tree, "AAAAHHHHHH, JUST GET OUT OF HERE, ALLRIGHT!!" She punched it again and again, putting all the strength she had behind the blows, letting her soul flow through.
"AAAAAHHHHH!" She sagged to the floor, raising her fists to the sky. She stared at it. She'd rip every star out of it if she could, rip them out and then apart and force them down into the bottom of sea and just watch them drown. She'd pulverise every bit of beauty in this world if someone gave her the power. It wasn't right, it wasn't allowed. But he was gone...
She felt sleep creep to her eyes. I'm not going to sleep now.... I can't possibly... What.... about.... that.... pirate...
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Jack observed 'him' from a distant. Funny lad, this Fen was. One minute he had all the cheek and self assurance in the world, next he was battering trees. Weird. He definitely needed to keep an eye on him. A sharp one at that. He could be off in the head. And that was worse than being untrustworthy. Gee, when you thought about it, it was even worse than being trustworthy!
Oh well, plenty of rum left. He grinned at the sight of a full chest of grimy bottles. He did owe Fen one there - it was good stuff. And what's more, there was lots of it...!
He stretched out on the sand, yawned, looked up at the stars, squinted, looked at them again, shook his head and took a swig of rum.
They'd have to be leaving at sunrise if they were going to row all the way to Tortuga. Well, it wasn't all that far away, half a day on a proper ship. But with a makeshift sail... Well, even he'd not be able to pull that one off!
Aw, who cared? All that mattered until that sunrise was that he had something good to drink, and it wasn't that that was lacking...
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Well, hope you liked it. If anyone thought it was a bit soppy or too much details, then you know exactly what to do.... And I'd be happy to change it.
But wait a sec', I nearly forgot... no-one reads this blasted story.... Damn.... you don't mean to say I'm talking to thin air.... Who would have thought of it....
Sorry, when I said no-one, I obviously wasn't counting you etheriums angel.... Thank you ever so much for your review! I love ones that say what I got wrong, so thank you.... Though, sorry to have to ask, but what do you mean by POV? *headdeskheaddesk*
There'll be more speech in the next one promise... But two chapters in two days is good, well for me anyway...
Please review!!
I ask you, what kind of crack are these people smoking?
TITLE: Pirate to the death
CULPRIT: jeyke
SUMMARY: "A young girl, having been stranded on an island for practically all of her life meets the Captain himself (by there I mean Jack of course) and goes off to find her past, with, as her only clue a map (classic story line, I know...)"
BEST LINE: "'Cry not liuhl one, sshh,' came the whisper, 'Ther' may be 'naught but tears teh cry upon m'whithr'd arm, bu' I'd see m'self dead, buried an' all, before y'cem teh h'rm.'" My brain hurts.
THE VERDICT
Walk the plank, bitch.
NAME: Fen
EYES: not described
HAIR: "hair burnt red by the sun"
DISTINGUISHING FEATURES: I guess looking like a boy. Also, Jack thinks there's something about her that says "I'm hiding something" and he thinks that Sue looks like she could "beat the living daylights out of any one of his crew." What. Ev. Er.
OH SO SPESHUL POSSESSIONS: A sword that she got from... somewhere.
OBNOXIOUS AND/OR IMPLAUSIBLE ORIGIN: Pintel found her on an island as a baby and raised her.
OBNOXIOUS AND/OR IMPLAUSIBLE CANON CONNECTIONS/AFFILIATIONS: Is a complete and total bitch to Jack. Will end up his one true love, most likely.
SOOPER SPESHUL ABILITIES: Being a loon.
THE "PLOT": Honestly, I don't have much of an idea exactly what's going on in this one. The prologue is just a few paragraphs of dialogue with an "accent" so horrific that I don't have the patience to try and figure out what it says. The gist, however, is that dude's found a baby on an island somewhere. We get a little timestamp of fifteen years later and Jack has been marooned on said island. I have no idea what time in relation to the movie this takes place or how Jack has managed to get himself marooned again. Anyway, Sue is hanging around on the island still. She threatens and ties up Jack for... well, no reason, really. She strikes me as being a bit nuts. Of course, living one's entire life on an island with Pintel might make someone nuts. He's the mystery man who found her you see (as revealed in chapter three). But then she seems the kind of nuts where she's not really supposed to be nuts, but a kick-ass grrl. In my wholly objective, personal opinion, she's batshit crazy. She's also, apparently, rather androgynous since all she has to do is tie her hair back to make Jack think she's a boy. Or maybe she's a hermaphrodite. Either way, Jack says that he'll get her off the island if she doesn't kill him. He gets her to gather a bunch of wood to build a raft. Apparently, this island is half a day away from Tortuga on a proper boat, so they're going to row there in on their raft. Jack goes off to do his business in some trees or something and Sue rages at the universe because apparently Pintel is dead.
NOTES: Uhm... yeah. Crappy!
I would complain that Sue has impressive social skills for someone who's spent their entire life with one other person... but while she doesn't act how I think that would cause someone to act, she, certainly, doesn't act normal either. Of course, that psychotic air that she gives off probably wasn't intentional. You never know with these Suethors.
Also, I nominate the horrible dialogue in the prologue for "Worst Accent Ever."
Hey, now that I think about it... when we hit a milestone number of Sues that would actually be a good category for a little awards thingy.
EXCERPT:
--the Hell?
Chapter 1: A desolate spit of land
The sun dropped, leaving 'naught but the faintest trickle of rosèd peach in the distant horizon. The wind whipped past the sodden ropes whisking foam- spray from the crashing waves. A child's cry screamed out, the only sound to be heard in the deep storm. Rotten, the planks of a sunken ship drifted deeper into the blooded water, that, as it neared the shore, broke into a thousand crashes. The last colours drained away into the depth of the night, hiding the crimes of the former day and opening doors to those that the wayward darkness had not ushered back to their safe haven.
A crackling came from the bushes bordering the shore. Someone crept softly down to the water side, "Cry not liuhl one, sshh," came the whisper, "Ther' may be 'naught but tears teh cry upon m'whithr'd arm, bu' I'd see m'self dead, buried an' all, before y'cem teh h'rm." the song flowed softly out to the clouded sky, it's soft melody calming to tired minds. A content gurgle came from a bundle of blankets. "Yer bin real brave yer have, in yer place, I'd not 'ave bin able teh keep my eyes from closing But there ain't neh need teh worry yerself now; I be wiv yer, me liuhl darlin'" He bent down and layed his lips softly to the baby's forehead, "I'll never let a tear cross yer cheek, engel. I's jus' yer an' me now. All the others, wel, the'r kind o' not 'ere no more, see wha' I mean. "Enyway, don't you be a' worrying yerself. Ye'll be fine, tiptop as the french cap'n used teh say" He looked down at the tiny bundle in his arms and, although it was too dark to be sure, gave such a look of love, one would have thought it his own child.
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Fifteen years later
Jack pushed through the undergrowth, "God damn it," he cried out. He was getting to have enough of "all this maroonin'" as he called it. Second time an' all that that year.
"I mean," he said to no-one in particular-indeed there appeared to be no- one in these god forsaken parts, "it's not like I was the only one havin' a bit to drink. Shouldn't 'ave expected anythin' else from Barbossa's kin, though, really," he muttered the last bit angrily under his breath, his eyes whirling around. His arms flailed out either side as if to keep him balanced and let's just say that he wasn't really "a' walkin'" in a straight line... He squinted at the near empty bottle clutched in his hand, "God, anyone would think he tapered with the rum", he took a few more crooked steps, "Bloody 'ell, stop hittin' me, would yer!" Clutching his head he looked around. Funny, there didn't seem to be anyone there, maybe he had bumped into a tree. He grinned idioticly, "Yeah, that must've been..." He whacked into a low hanging branch and of a sudden his complaints were cut short as he fell back, forced into a starry oblivion.
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He came to, watching as the world tipped gradually back into focus. He shook his head and went to push himself into an upright position, when he felt hard metal cool against the nape of his neck.
"Don't...make...one...move" forceful words filtered to his ears from behind. Jack's mind whizzed - this might be a problem.
"Yeah...well... I'll just be goin'..." he made a move to push the blade away.
"I said and will now repeat... Do not make a move, " he was whirled around and someone grabbed his collar, the point of the sword now pushed down hard against his chest - the stranger was obviously not just making fancy threats. "or I shall transperce your heart."
"Aha, really, yer don't say. Well, I'd be in a bit of a tricky position if yer did, don't yer think..." Jack retorted, attempting unsuccessfully a diplomatic aproach.
"That has absolutely nothing to do with me."
"Well, no, not exactly. But I was thinkin'" he gestured with his arms, still dazy from the rum, which, he thought, had to have been drugged, "if you're stranded here for the same reason as I am, you might need a bit of help gettin'...unstranded." Jack flashed her a grin. The stranger grimaced, Ugh, of all the bad things that could happen... It just had to be a drunken pirate that came along, didn't it. Oh well, she thought, it's not as if there is any other way to get away from here, except swimming, but I'll drown before I even see land. She knew from what little distances she had swum with her pa' that there was no other island within miles, and she had swore on everything she held true that she'd follow the map. The map. Her hand flew to her side... No it was still there.
Jack watched her, Now that is interesting, he thought
"And you have a boat, I suppose?"
"A ship, luv', a ship... the Black Pearl, in fact. Jack started to ease up as the stranger lessened their grip.
"Luv'?" She thought quickly, remembering in one blow all her pa' had told her about pirates... 'taking advantage' of young girls. She'd go under disguise - this...pirate...would never need know. Her looks, she knew, were enough to class her as a boy, well, when her hair was tied back.
"Slip o' the tongue" Jack eyed warily as the sharp blade pushed harder.
"And this ship of yours, it would be passing by, would it?" A gust of laughter burst out from the stranger's throat. "I have lived on this spit of land my entire life and not once has a living person set foot on it's earth, nor one ship anchored on it's shore."
"Who said she wasn't waiting just off shore?"
"I am not a fool, nor am I blind." something in her voice made Jack know she was not joking, and he didn't keep up the pretence.
"Allright, here's the deal" He made himself a bit comfier, causing the stranger to raise an eyebrow. "You let me go free," he gestured wildly with each word, "an' I'll get us teh Tortuga. The only real port in the carribean" He added, seeing his captor's lost look. "What say you?"
"What say you?" This is going to take some getting used to, she realised as she repeated his words, unsure of their meaning.
"What the exactly do you think about my proposition?" He couldn't take it anymore... his head felt like it was splitting in half and this... hellcat... was getting on his nerves.
"Sounds allright," she sat back, keeping her father's sword against Jack's chest. Then frowned, "And precisely what would I do when I got there? I have no money..."
"Ha, well..." Jack looked her - or what was visible of her - up and down, "there's a lot o' space at Tortuga... a lot o' men looking fer 'pleasurable company', as you'd call it." He grinned, showing gold teeth that shone in the sparse rays, "I'm sure you could find some...occupation."
Another burst of laughter, Well, here it goes, she thought grimly "And they'd be gay, would they?" She leant into the light, revealing the face of a sixteen year old "boy" - or so Jack thought - crowned by what must have been shoulder length hair tied scruffily up behind a bandanna. He looked like he was about to burst out laughing and make some catty remark, but, remembering the point against his chest, he just widened his kohl-lined eyes and said "You never know. Sorry, I think I got the wrong end of the stick..."
"You disgusting scallywag. You would have made a woman sell herself?"
Jack eyed the blade again, rather cautiously and thought a while. "I'll give you a place on me ship."
She stared at him, then looked around, sadness creeping to her eyes as she remembered her pa'. She sighed and turned back to Jack - who gave her a curious look - and said matter of factly,
"I accept, on two conditions. One, I want the best cabin on your mangly ship, two, you'll never call me luv' again if you want to keep your tongue. It'll be...Fen." That statement provoked a straightened back and murderous look from Jack. That's me ship you're insulting, you cross-eyed idiot.
"There's only one cabin in me ship, Fen, and that be me own!"
Fen stood up, smiled patiently, whilst bringing her sword to draw blood from his neck. He winced. "I'd think pretty quick if I were you, mister, because the other option is a slit throat..." "That'll be captain to you," he muttered
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What did you think of it? It's my first time so don't come down to hard on me, but please tell me everything... Is Jack true to his nature? I'm not all that sure he is. Too much description? Not enough? PLEASE REVIEW. Everything you say will be taken into account (so don't go mad!) And do you feel it gets a bit long at the end? Oh yeah, are the dialects allright or do they not work?
Thank you for reading it, hope you weren't too bored. See you at Chapter 2!!!
Angst, angst, angst. It's always angst. Why can't any Sues ever be happy? Wait, I take that back. I don't want the universe to provide me with any Sparklypoos, or whatever they'd be called in this fandom.
Chapter 3: Past sickness
"So this father of yours... Yer said he was a member of the Royal Navy. Did he tell yer of the pirate tha' wreaked 'avoc on the fleet? Rather handsome man... Had no match in a sword fight... Some even called 'im..." He swallowed and tried to focus, "Some even called 'im..."
"Yes? Don't stop..." Fen 'encouraged', even though she could easily see he was completely stoned and knew she should take away the bottle of rum she'd given him. Well, I will... she thought, I might just have a bit of a laugh first... She smiled mischeviously. She wouldn't go too far. Just a little joke.
"I jus' need to go alleviate meself," Jack tottered to his feet, his darkened dreadlocks rocking to and fro.
Fen watched him disappear into the trees, now to start on that little trick...
She crept away, down quite far from where Jack had entered.
Some wood would be a good start, then a bit of fire and water... That'll be just right, she thought spotting some relatively dry sticks littering the ground and a couple more, still green pushing out from some young trees.
Fen hacked the branches off, edging nearer to the the borders of the rich undergrowth that blanketed the whole of the centre of the island. This was going to be a good one, teach him right for trying to boast so much. She looked up, it was covered in shadows; the night was beginning to take its toll. She shivered, a slight salty breeze brushing her bare arms.
All of a sudden a sweep of homesickness took hkold of her. Homesick when you've never left home... impossible. But she had left it or rather - it had left her - it had flown back to the past. A single tear made it's way down her cheek. She shook it angrily off. Two weeks, only two weeks. That wasn't much when you thought about it. It wasn't much at all. And the bitter anger that wracked her heart had not yet disappeared. She laughed grimly, As if it would.... She looked down to the pile of sticks laying on the sand. She wasn't in the mood anymore. Couldn't care less if the 'Captain' fell off the cliff or boasted until the ocean's had dried to salt crusts. She just wanted it to go back to normal, back to the way it had been before, when Pintel had taught her to play, taught her to jump and scream from joy. Taught her to use a sword - and she hadn't half fought well when she'd known how to - it had been in her blood and with every parry her mind had soared, soared to meet the seagulls flying in the distant skies. She shivered again, but this time the breeze came from somewhere else, some distant past, wrought with memories, all beautiful and pure, they half jumped out to the twilight, rejoicing to be let out, to be remembered - she had tried to lock them away too hard. True it had only been two weeks, but two weeks was still eternity. Eternity and the slightest moment, what was she thinking, it couldn't be both, could it? Cripes, she was getting herself confused there.
She leant against a nearby tree, feeling it's rough bark, just smelling it, feeling it. Gosh it was real, real like nothing else, real in some still distant way. That's what her life amounted too, when you thought about it, wood, sea and wind. Yeah... wood, sea and wind. The memories flooded back.
"AAAAAHHHHH," she yelled, punching the tree, "AAAAHHHHHH, JUST GET OUT OF HERE, ALLRIGHT!!" She punched it again and again, putting all the strength she had behind the blows, letting her soul flow through.
"AAAAAHHHHH!" She sagged to the floor, raising her fists to the sky. She stared at it. She'd rip every star out of it if she could, rip them out and then apart and force them down into the bottom of sea and just watch them drown. She'd pulverise every bit of beauty in this world if someone gave her the power. It wasn't right, it wasn't allowed. But he was gone...
She felt sleep creep to her eyes. I'm not going to sleep now.... I can't possibly... What.... about.... that.... pirate...
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Jack observed 'him' from a distant. Funny lad, this Fen was. One minute he had all the cheek and self assurance in the world, next he was battering trees. Weird. He definitely needed to keep an eye on him. A sharp one at that. He could be off in the head. And that was worse than being untrustworthy. Gee, when you thought about it, it was even worse than being trustworthy!
Oh well, plenty of rum left. He grinned at the sight of a full chest of grimy bottles. He did owe Fen one there - it was good stuff. And what's more, there was lots of it...!
He stretched out on the sand, yawned, looked up at the stars, squinted, looked at them again, shook his head and took a swig of rum.
They'd have to be leaving at sunrise if they were going to row all the way to Tortuga. Well, it wasn't all that far away, half a day on a proper ship. But with a makeshift sail... Well, even he'd not be able to pull that one off!
Aw, who cared? All that mattered until that sunrise was that he had something good to drink, and it wasn't that that was lacking...
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Well, hope you liked it. If anyone thought it was a bit soppy or too much details, then you know exactly what to do.... And I'd be happy to change it.
But wait a sec', I nearly forgot... no-one reads this blasted story.... Damn.... you don't mean to say I'm talking to thin air.... Who would have thought of it....
Sorry, when I said no-one, I obviously wasn't counting you etheriums angel.... Thank you ever so much for your review! I love ones that say what I got wrong, so thank you.... Though, sorry to have to ask, but what do you mean by POV? *headdeskheaddesk*
There'll be more speech in the next one promise... But two chapters in two days is good, well for me anyway...
Please review!!